The Snarls in Pursuing Love
by Sangfly
Summary: Kel and Dom. Its all yours.
1. Chapter 1

Late night happenings

Kel gave her glittering gown a one last tug before she entered the room the serving man had led her to. Her back ached from standing perfectly straight all night and her head spun lightly from the amount of wine she had consumed. It was that, or converse with the conservatives hounding her and dance. She had no wish to partake in either so as an alternative she nursed her drink that night. It was the final Mid Winter ball of the year and she was greatly relieved. Only four days and she would be riding back to New Hope with the Kings Own. It was a promising chance to be entertained on the ride alone. Kel needed to get out of the palace.

Once in the dimly lit and small sitting room Kel dipped into a low curtsy to the elegant white haired woman sitting on the couch. She figured if she was going to dress as a Lady for the night, she would act as one. The woman was expected, but the man next to her was not. Ilane had called Kel, her daughter, herself but never mentioned that Baron Piers, her father, would be there as well. Both were out of their party gear and donned light traveling clothes.

When Kel stood strait again both of her parents were beaming at her. Unexpectedly her mother swept her up in a hug, squeezing Kel till her eyes bulged slightly before letting go. Piers squeezed his youngest daughters shoulder smiling softly. She never ceased to amaze him. She was beautiful in her glimmering golden party gown Lalasa had made to fit her perfectly. Her hair was let to its natural sun streaked waves and pinned back from her face and her hazel eyes were barely touched by kohl making them seem longer. Her wide, full mouth was colored and she looked almost god born. She didn't seem like his Kel.

But she was, and he knew it.

"You look beautiful tonight." Ilane told her daughter to her discomfort. She smiled when Kel frowned. "We'll miss you."

That was right. How could she forget so easily? They were leaving back to the Yamani Islands for a year to visit the Empire and the Royal house, and this time she wouldn't be with them. Her heart twisted with worry and concern. What if something happened to her or them? This would be the last time they get to say goodbye. She was leaving back to New Hope in four days.

She hugged her mother then, feeling nothing like the woman she was. The woman who saved countless lives, who fought immortals, who killed mages and fought with the creations they made. She was the first female page, the first Lady Knight to fairly gain her shield, but right now it felt like she was five again and huddled behind her mother's skirts.

"You'll write?" she asked.

"As soon as we get there," Ilane promised and squeezed her daughter back. After a few moments they drew apart both with tears brimming in their eyes. Laughing wetly Ilane whipped her daughters face. "It's only for a year. We'll be back."

Kel nodded and then hugged her father. "If you get ambushed by pirates or Scanrans I'll come after you." She promised weakly.

He chuckled and brushed her hair back, holding her in front of himself to look at. "No need for that, Kel. We'll be fine." He squeezed her shoulders affectionately before stepping back. "Now, it's late." Kel looked around the room and noticed the candle had burned down two hours past midnight. She hadn't noticed. Piers continued. "We'll be leaving in a few hours and you need to go for bed. I know you still wake up early."

Kel nodded and hugged them both again, kissing their cheeks. She knew her father was right, and she left them to finish their packing with a shaky goodbye. Wobbly from the amount she had drunk that night she used the wall as a support as she made her way to her rooms. The hall was empty and Kel could hear stifled giggles and whispers as the last party goers made their way to their rooms.

Quietly she slipped into her room and quickly pulled off the uncomfortable dress that clung to her. Remember to kill Yuki for telling Lalasa to change the dress I asked for design, Kel thought as she looked at the now wrinkled ball gown she threw on her desk chair. It had a low cut neckline and the color was far too flashy for her taste.

Silently she slipped into her nightgown and looked at her small, one person bed. Jump was curled up on the blankets and snoring loudly. She wished she could do the same, but her nerves were getting the better of her and burned away all her exhaustion. She was worried about her parent's departure, New Hope, the war, the up coming weddings, Tobe staying at the palace when she left to work with the horses, her friends, herself…. She wasn't sure what she would do after the war ended. She was already restless as it was and she knew new Hope wouldn't need her once Scanra calmed down. She didn't want to be a solitary knight. She wanted to work. She needed to keep busy.

I can't stand it here. She looked around at the cold stone walls. She was trapped in that room. Normally at New Hope Kel would be up on the battlements, doing her best to stay awake and keep the nightmares at bay. Now she stood in front of her bed actually welcoming sleep only to have it deny her.

Typical, she thought as she pulled on a Yamani styled robe. It was a deep midnight blue with elegant flowers covering the sleek silk. Kel preferred it when she had to don something over her night clothes. Its sleeves were wide and the robe itself long. The silk held in her body heat as she slipped back out into the hall.

She stuck to the dark halls at first not wanting to be seen till she found herself outside in the courtyard. A few yards away was a low branched layered tree barely touched by the snow. It was ideal for climbing and her fingers twitched for movement. Quickly she trotted over to it as fast as she could in an attempt to keep the snow from soaking the hem of her robe, but it was little help.

Quickly she scrambled up the frozen branches and sat with her legs swinging in the air. The winter air nipped at her face making her cheeks pink. Her teeth chattered but she welcomed the feeling. She wasn't one to purposely cause pain to her body, but the chill kept her from thinking about her worries.

Dom wandered outside when the ball had finally ended, chocking for fresh air. His head was tingling deliciously from the drink he had taken in, and it made his body heat rise. He needed the cold air. It wouldn't sober him up completely but it would help him walk a bit straighter.

He had been stupid, having a drink every time he saw his cousin and his fiancée kiss. They were getting married, of course they would partake in a lot of kisses. At least I didn't spill anything on my uniform, he thought as he stumbled through the courtyard. He was dressed in his dress uniform, a mixture of silver blue and black. At some part of the night he had lost his sergeants band. Some young lady probably had it at the moment.

He squinted and quieted his steps when he saw a shadow in one of the courtyards trees. It moved slightly and he heard the rustle of silk. Ah, a lady. He moved forward without announcing his presence. Once under the branch the woman was seated on he saw that she was downed in a Yamani styled robe. An early riser, no, she simply couldn't sleep. Only Kel and her friends rise so early and their probably still asleep. He contemplated over who the woman was as he studied the design on her robe. He came to a decision that he would just introduce himself.

He hoped he wouldn't stumble as he climbed up the branches wishing he had leaned away from his glass. Once at the woman's level he sat next to her on the branch. She didn't move, didn't even seem to breathe. Her hands were folded delicately in her lap, moonlight reflecting off white scars. Dom smiled. So this was one of the fighting ladies.

"Hello," he whispered, leaving his voice thick so if his words slurred it would be less noticeable. The lady jumped and her robe slipped against the ice on the branch. She screeched when she slipped back and Dom reached out quickly grabbing her around the waist and pulling up and into his side for support. He stifled a laugh. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you, Lady."

She looked up at him, hazel eyes large and deep. Her sun streaked blond hair fell half in her face and curled slightly at her pink cheek bone. Her skin was tanned and smooth, her mouth full and partly open from fear of falling. Her nose was delicate and dusted with freckles. He knew this face. He had looked into those hazel eyes countless times over the past few years. He was shocked speechless. He hadn't seen her all night and was sure she had skipped the ball as Raoul used to. Now he saw the scant amount of face paint on her lids. She had been there, he just hadn't noticed.

"Kel," he managed, "what-why are you up here?"

"I could ask you the same thing." She pulled back from him, her face icy and cold. He watched her as she slid down from the branch and landed gracefully on her feet, something he wasn't sure he could do in his state.

"What's wrong?" he asked referring to her mask. She only wore it during battle now or in a fight. Something had to be wrong.

She paused for a moment and turned back to him, face still slightly chilled. That hurt him. She held out a helping hand to him when he didn't move from his perch. "You're drunk." She stated. He winced. She must have heard some slur that gave him away.

She kept him from falling as he clumsily climbed down. He took a stab in the dark when he heard her tongue click on the top of her mouth as she said the two short words. "So are you."

She glowered at him for a moment, before her face melted and she smiled rubbing her head. "Yeah, it was an accident. I- I've never drank so much before. No more then a few sips." That made him grin, that and her own smile. Her face brightened. "I hope I didn't disappoint you, or am I wrong when you were looking to romance some strange Lady?"

Dom frowned for a second before smiling. "Never My Lady Knight, our Protector of the Small. Who could possibly be disappointed when in the presence of one as marveling as yourself?" He took her hand and bowed grandly, kissing her fingertips. He looked up into her eyes, falling down to his knees. "Tell me, gentle lady, what is it that has you distressed?" He held her hand to his cold cheek and it warmed it to a degree that it turned his skin pink. "I would wish to burn your problems from your beauteous face. Only tell me."

"At the moment, Dom, you're the only thing causing me distress. If you could call this that."

He dropped her hand from his face and clutched his heart, falling back into a drift of snow. He smiled when he heard Kel's giggles and sat up in the snow pile only to have a snowball hit him in the chest. He looked at the spot where it had hit him on his already wet tunic then at Kel who had her hands at her sides. Water dripped from her fingertips.

"My Lady!" Dom sputtered in false rage. He pulled himself from the snow but Kel had already taken off, giggling as she stumbled and ran from him. "I will not be ignored!" he bellowed as he took chase.

It wasn't hard to catch her, she kept tripping over the folds of her robe and obviously hadn't had much experience with being mobile and intoxicated as he. "Got ya'," he laughed when he wrapped his arms around her waist. Before she could pull back he had her over his shoulder and was walking to a deep snow patch.

"No, Dom, no!" Kel protested as she wiggled to get away from him. He wrapped his arms around both her legs and held them together so she couldn't kick him. "Dom!" she yelled and he threw her into the snow, grinning as he watched her stand back up wet.

"You look like an angry cat." He informed her. Her hair was damp and the pins that had held it together had fallen out. Her robe had slipped open and she shivered when wind pulled it open further. Dom looked at her, shaking in a thin , wet cotton nightgown that clung to her. Heat rushed through him when he noticed just how her body, particularly her chest, had reacted to being cold.

She stocked over to him, snow in both her hands, and hurled one handful at his face where it hit him squarely. When he opened his eyes she was right in front of him. His breathing hitched and she took her other handful and rubbed it into his hair, making it as wet as her own. She took a step back, looking over her work. "You look funny wet." She commented and began walking away.

Dom shook his head, making his hair stick out in points. "Where are you going?" he asked, following her.

She didn't look back when she answered. "Well, I'm soaking wet, slightly pissed, and freezing. What else am I going to do? I'm going to find a drink."

"Well then," Dom pulled a flask from in his tunic and passed it to her after taking a swig. "You should have said so."

He followed her to her rooms with idle chatting and fell into a chair as she lit a branch of candles. Jump raced up to him, panting happily before returning to his spot on her bed, falling asleep once more. The room lit Kel pulled off her robe and began running a brush through her hair, now grown past her chin by two inches. Dom watched her as he drank from his flask.

"Leaving again soon." She mumbled as she set the brush down. Tiredly she sat across from him on her couch, well, she half sat half laid down. Dom looked at her legs, her hips, her chest. He couldn't help himself. He took another swig to distract himself and past the flask to her.

Kel took it and took a deep gulp, surprising him. She must have had something upsetting on her mind. "I didn't see you tonight." He commented, his voice muffled as he pulled his wet tunic over his head. Getting up he set it in front of the fire place and began working on making a bigger fire. "Did you walk out on us Protector? Too many men hounding you for a dance?"

"Funny Dom. I was there." She guzzled the rest of the brandy and dropped the flask to the floor. "You're out of brandy."

"What?" he turned and picked up the flask. He looked at her shocked. "This was full Kel."

"You had some too." She reminded him, closing her eyes.

He sighed and turned back to the fire place, pulling off his shirt and putting it with his tunic to dry. He flopped down on the couch next to Kel. To his surprise she rested her head in his lap, her guards down thanks to the brandy. He wrapped his arm around her to rest on her shoulder, a natural position. "Well, who were you with all night then, if you did go?" he asked.

"Hmm, conservatives." She said sleepily. Her laugh was soft. "That's why I was drinking."

"Oh, sorry." It was quiet after that. She's really tired, Dom noted her limp legs and the tight shoulder muscles. When he looked at her face again she was asleep, frowning and whining softly. She couldn't even relax in her sleep. He closed his eyes and rested his head against hers, feeling her breath against his face. Slowly he fell asleep as well, worry for his best friend creasing his forehead.

Kel woke up not long after she had fallen asleep, panting and cringing. Her mind raced with pictures, a collage of the dying and the dead. Children's cries rang in her ears and she panicked, jumping to her feet and knocking Dom over. She fell from her fighting position when she remembered Tobe was in the stables, but that only let her mind remember the dream clearer.

She hugged herself, cringing as the pictures hit her. The voices and their cries sounded so real that she wanted to cry herself. She bit her lip and forced her eyes shut to prevent it, but she was shuddering and gasping as more memories hit her.

"Kel?" something tugged at her arm, trying to make her turn and let herself go. Reluctantly she turned around and looked up at Dom, a tear escaping the corner of her eye and rolling down her red cheek. Dom looked surprised, and hurt, and sad all at the same time. She could feel empathy radiating off of him as he pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly to his chest. "Kel." He whispered into her hair and kissed her forehead.

Kel let him hold her as she worked to calm her heart. She didn't know if it was because her crush for so many years was hugging her half naked, or because of her dream, but it was hard to control her thoughts.

Suddenly she pulled back, breaking from his hold. "Shit!"

"What?" Dom asked. He watched her as she scrambled around the room. His eyes widened and he looked away quickly when she tugged off her nightgown and pulled on her breeches.

She ignored his presence and continued to change. She tugged on her boots and bolted for the door, blowing out the branch of melting candles as she past. Dom followed after her, tugging on his shirt.

It was still dark out when Kel made it to the stables. The years of traveling with the Own paid off and she had Hoshi saddled in minutes. Dom didn't even try to stop her, and instead saddled up his gelding.

Pulling herself up on Hoshi she took off as fast as she could not caring if Dom was behind her. She was being stupid and rash and silly, but she didn't care. She raced through Corus, heading down the empty and dark streets. There was no noise but for Hoshi's clomping steps.

She halted at the gate leading out of the city and tied Hoshi up quickly. Ignoring the guards that watched her warily she clamored to the ladder up to the top of the battlements and began to climb.

When she reached the top she saw the sun peaking over the land and a carriage off in the distance. Biting her lip she sent a prayer to the goddess to watch her mother and father on their trip. To watch her family. She couldn't protect them anymore, the moment they stepped on the boat she couldn't do anything. She was sworn to her realm and they were leaving it. She couldn't defend them as a knight and she hated it. What was the point of knighthood when you couldn't even protect your loved ones?

Arms snacked around her and she leaned back knowing it was Dom behind her. "I'm sorry." She whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I just don't want them to get hurt when I'm not around. It's too dangerous now." She knew deep down inside that they would be fine, that the Scanrans were frozen where they stood at the moment by Tortallan soldiers, but her heart wouldn't listen.

Dom squeezed her and rocked slightly back and forth. Kel was reminded of when she had done the same to Tobe when he was frightened or crying. It felt odd for someone to be doing the same for her, holding her together.

"It's alright," he whispered back. He didn't try to turn her away from the road. He let her look off at the spot where her parents had disappeared in. "They'll be fine. They'll be back next year and you'll be leaving to New Hope in a few days. You can see your people again." He tried to cheer her up with that fact, but she knew that her time there was numbered. Soon New Hope would be a town, and she would be a position-less knight. Stuck at court with nothing to do but attend balls and keep in practice.

They stood there and watched as the sun rose slowly. Eventually Kel turned and looked at Dom, smiling weakly. "Lets go see Neal and get him to make us some hangover remedy. My head hurts."


	2. Chapter 2

Cranked Rode-trips

Silently and quickly Kel cinched up Hoshi and loaded up her few saddlebags. It was finally time to leave and she was hoping getting back to New Hope would cause some sort of release. The past few days had been torture as she waited for their departure. Her friends had tried to distract her, but she still twitched when the quiet took over and she had nothing to do but relax. Kel didn't relax well and her friends were concerned.

Riding Hoshi out she waited with a group of men from the Own who would be coming back to the fort with her. New Hope was one of the forts in Tortall with the lowest number of soldiers and most action. Third company would be station at New Hope under her command till Raoul came back from Fort Giant-killer. Then he would take over and lead them to survey the surrounding ground of the camp to see how they faired.

Kel's impatience to leave rose steadily. When Raoul arrived on Drum she was the Yamani Lump, emotionless as she sat on top of Hoshi. Raoul laughed. "We're leaving shortly Kel, you don't have to worry."

"I don't want to get caught in ghastly weather." She mumbled.

Raoul grinned and looked up at the cloudless azure sky. "Kel, it's not going to storm on us or even floury. You know that."

She looked at him and gave a sheepish grin. "Yeah, I know Sir. I just want to get out of here."

Raoul nodded understanding. He was like her on that topic and he would be relieved to be away from the palace and it's balls. The yard was anything but quiet as the men waited for the late risers to arrive. Neal showed not long after Raoul and Kel talked with him about the wedding.

"It's not going to be perfect," he sulked. "I hate that we have to do it at New Hope rather then Queenscove, but what can we do in war? Yuki' s leaving after we're gone, probably tomorrow afternoon. She said she would pick up your dress and bring it with her. Lalasa is coming as well with my blossom. Something about giving you another fitting before the big day."

Kel sighed at the thought of another fitting. They already gone to a million and the dress was already made. Shouldn't it be over? She listened to Neal and laughed at his descriptions of the ceremony though she had heard it all before.

They were waiting on a lone person now, she could tell by how restless the men were getting. She herself was far past restless. It was when Dom rode up on his horse that it snapped.

"There's my Best Man!" Neal yelled upon his cousin's arrival. Dom rode over to ride between Neal and Kel at the front of the company. Kel, Raoul and Flyn all looked at him darkly as Neal slapped him on the back.

Dom grinned at them all and looked at Kel. It was when he heard she had disobeyed Lord Wyldon and had gone after her refugees he realized how much he really loved her. Loved her strength, her humor, her smile, her laugh. He just loved _her_. He always had. When he had first seen her on the back of her huge gelding he had know she wouldn't fall. She was too stubborn. He had made it a point to speak to her on her first day when he realized Raoul had taken her as his squire. He remembered her, a five foot nine adolescent covered in bruises, and looking at her now he could see the change. She was a woman, and at the moment, slightly pissed.

"Something wrong?" he asked, already guessing the answer. He just wasn't expecting her reaction. She pulled an elegant ruby colored fan from her belt in a fast motion and rapped him over the head with it. "Ow!" he rubbed his skull. "What was that for?"

"Tardiness is not expectable, Dom." She said, tucking her fan back into her belt. She looked at Raoul. "Would you call your men into motion, Sir?"

He nodded and the flags were raised and they moved out at a steady pace. Dom nudged his dappled grey horse next to Hoshi, glad Kel had left Peachblossom back at New Hope. He smiled brightly at her and she only looked blankly back at him. That was worse then a scowl, he hated her mask. "Oh, come on Kel." He pulled out a flask and held it out to her. Elegantly he rose a dark brow and her insides melted agreeably. "Drink?" he offered.

Her mask slipped and she glared openly at the flask making Dom laugh when she rubbed her head. "No thanks," she declined.

He sighed jokingly and tucked the flask away, pulling out another. "I thought you might say something like that." He held out the other flask to her with a dazzling smile. Her stomach flipped with the smile and she had to work to cover the heat rising to her cheeks. "Tea?"

He saw her doubtful look and twisted off the cap, holding it out for her to smell. She instantly noticed the odor of green tea. She looked at him. "You drink this?"

Dom never had been taught as she had to cover emotion and she saw the blush before he looked forward. He pressed the flask in her hand and she took a swig, watching him. "No," he replied looking ahead still. "I've just seen you drink it is all."

"Oh." He meant he bought it for her. She took another drink of it. "Err- really it's not worth buying here. Too much money. I get mine from home where we have a storage of it from Yamani. It's cheaper."

Suddenly Dom turned and grinned at her. The grin threw her off and made her throat close. "It's alright. I have deep pockets Kel." He said suggestively. Her chest ached and her skin burned. "Very deep pockets."

She was unable to hide the blush or how her eyes grew larger. Dom savored the look, basked in it. He could never tell her how he felt, but he could always fantasize what it would be like together. Moment's like this when he broke through to her weren't rare but he savored them like he would never witness them again.

She looked forward and cleared her throat so her voice wouldn't brake. "Well, your house is old. You've probably accumulated a lot of money."

"Hmm, I-"

"That's right!" Neal cut him off. He looked at Kel grinning. "I almost forgot. Yuki said to remind you to practice your fan dance for the ceremony or she'll find another maid of honor."

Kel grinned at him. "Good, then I wont. The last thing I want is to be in the wedding." Her eyes tightened when she looked at him. "Specially one where I have to wear a dress."

"You couldn't wear breeches! Yuki would kill me if I let you!"

"Personally," Dom cut in, "I like you in breeches better." He looked down at her legs, eyes purposely lingering. Kel turned a dark color. Pulling her foot out of the stirrup she kicked him.

"Shut up Dom," her voice was commanding.

Neal looked at his cousin with raised brows. "You, dear Dom, have to do the dance with her."

"What?" Dom yelled, startling the whole company into listening. "How can you ask me to dance at your wedding as performance? With a fan no less!"

The company began to chuckle and Kel giggled at his silliness. "It's not really dancing Dom. It's fighting with fans, remember? A _Shukusen_," she opened hers and let him see the blade. "Neal showed the one Yuki gave him, right? The one he almost cut his fingers off with."

Dom rubbed a scar on his arm, exposed by his pushed up sleeves. "He did more then just show me." He glared at his cousin who grinned back.

"You said it didn't look sharp enough to cut wood, and Yuki was to frail to put that much power on a blow." Kel glared at him and Dom shrugged, knowing she was annoyed at the comment. "You deserved it."

"So I have to do a dance with Kel using that?" He nodded to her hip and the fan there.

Neal nodded. "Just a dance, no fighting. I voted for a duel but Yuki said it would be upsetting for your mother to see Kel kill you and she didn't want all the blood."

"And as a good pet he didn't disagree." Kel amended and dodged the smack Neal aimed at her, steering Hoshi to her right out of reach. Dom's calm gelding didn't move as Hoshi got closer and Kel's leg pressed to Dom's. A pang in her lower stomach shot through her body and she couldn't breathe. All the air seemed to thicken around them, and she couldn't see strait. She was too dizzy and caught up in her own reaction to notice Dom having an inner battle with himself.

She led Hoshi back into formation when she had caught herself. "Sorry," she choked. Neal was laughing when he noticed his cousins and friends red faces.

"Don't be," Dom breathed. He really didn't want her to be sorry. He wanted to touch her again and see what would happen. See if his body would actually shut down completely from the contact of their skin, but friends didn't do that. She was his friend.

The rest of the ride was pretty quiet and they made camp when darkness fell. Kel set up her tent quickly and unrolled her bedroll inside the shelter. After she was finished she helped light the fire and was headed to Hoshi to join the patrol group when Raoul grabbed her shoulder. "I think you should stay behind and get dinner before the other men come back, Kel."

She looked up at him. "Sir-"

"Kel," he interrupted her. "If I gave the choice to get some rest to one of the other men they wouldn't turn it down. Just try to rest up tonight. I don't want you stressed. I'm trusting you with my men when I leave and I need you level to deal with them. You know how they behave."

Kel nodded once, not happy with staying behind, and headed off to the bonfire to watch as some of the men made their dinner. She settled down by a half asleep Neal who looked at her oddly. Obviously he hadn't thought she would stick around for long. "Raoul made me stay behind." She said curtly.

Neal nodded and went back to resting his eyes. Kel watched the flicking fire and scooted closer to the flames till the heat burned a hole in her knee. She watched as the flames snaked up and licked at the black kettle of heavy portage the men had placed over it. It was too cold to hunt and none of them were up to it. Soon the riding parting came back to report that the area was secure.

When Kel got her bowl she tried to eat as fast as she could and burned her tongue doing so. She wanted to get into her tent. She wanted to get out of her wet clothes and into her bedroll. She was only halfway through her bowl when the snow next to her broke as someone sat down. She turned to face Dom grinning at her with his dinner.

He noticed her fast pace. "Don't want to eat with us poor lonesome soldiers?" he asked teasingly. His face was suddenly sullen. "And here I was thinking you like me."

I do like you. Far, far too much, she thought to herself. "Eat your food Dom before it gets cold like the rest of us."

"Ah," he said in recognition. "The Ladies cold, is that it?"

Kel was never one to complain of harsh weather, but she wasn't in her best mood. "We're all cold, and wet, and tired." She droned and spooned another mouthful of her dinner. "We're stuck outside like this for a while. I knew I shouldn't have gone to the palace, but the king ordered it. I don't know why he needed me there, he had Raoul. All I did was be bashed by conservatives and get drunk with you."

"As my memory serves you were drunk before that." He grinned. "Wow, I think that's the most I've heard you complain." He chuckled warmly when Kel blushed.

"I'm just cranky Dom." She sighed.

Dom looked at her face as she watched the fire. Her skin was its healthy tan, but there were deep purple bruises under her eyes showing many sleepless nights. Like always there was tension in all her muscles and she sat slightly slumped. She looked like she would fall asleep any moment, that is if it just got quiet enough, but she never did. She sat there, fixated on the fire with her empty bowl cradled in her hands like a child.

Quickly he finished off his meal and wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into his side in what he hoped looked like a friendly gesture. She rested her head on his chest and he hoped she wouldn't hear his rapid heartbeat. Dom could feel her breath press his tunic closer to him and tried to refocus his mind to not give himself away. "Maybe if you got more sleep you'd feel better," he suggested lightly already knowing the answer.

"I'm fine," she bit her lip to hold in a yawn. She hadn't slept at all the night before and it was dragging down on her. "I-I just got to get back to the fort. See the refugees."

He heard the truth in the words. She was hoping that would help pull her out of this sleepless slump. She was hoping that would stop the nightmares he knew she must be having. He was hoping on that too now. He wanted his Kel back, his happy Kel. Absently he pulled her closer to him till she was practically half in his lap.

Kel stopped breathing for a few seconds. She was so close to him, almost lying on top of him. She could feel his heart beat where her ear was rested. Her voice hitched when his hand rubbed her shoulder softly. "Dom r-really, I'm fine. Just a little tired and cranky."

"And cold," he reminded her. It was quiet for a moment. "Kel," he kept his voice hushed. "You know you can talk to me, if you're upset. Need anyone to share your feelings with-"

"I said I'm fine, Dom." She cut him off. He nodded and watched the fire, letting her lean into him. Between the two of them they weren't cold anymore, and when Dom looked at her she had fallen asleep on him again.

Neal came up behind them. He and Dom exchanged worried looks before Neal nodded. "Bring her back to her tent before she freezes." There was anxiety in his cousin's voice, and that made Dom anxious as well.

"Do you know…." He trailed off when Neal shook his head, "Right." He picked Kel up and cradled her in his arms. As he carried her to her tent he wondered if Neal knew of his crush on her, if that's why he let him bring her to her tent rather then doing it himself.

No. He couldn't.

Without difficulty Dom shrugged through the tent flap and bent down to his knees, setting Kel on her bedroll. She was shivering again without his body heat and was biting her bottom lip in her sleep. Dom reached out and eased his finger over her bottom lip, trying fleetingly to make her let it go. When she didn't immediately he pulled back and watched her, shuddering from the cold and giving off muffled groans. She looked tired, and not getting any satisfaction out of her sleep.

She would be warmer if she didn't have all her wet clothes on, Dom thought to himself. His hand snuck up to the hem of her tunic, fingering the blue fabric. No, he thought pulling back his hand. It wouldn't be right.

But Neal would have done it if it was him. He has had to take off bits of her clothes before in order to clean her wounds. Dom's hands slipped back up to the edge of her tunic, fingertips scooting under the fabric to feel the cotton of her undershirt. It would be a friendly gesture, him caring for her needs as a friend.

He started off with the basics, pulling off her boots and wet socks, putting the clothes away in one of her saddlebags. It was when he was unlacing her belt he realized he was stalling. After coiling up the belt and putting it away he took a deep breath before settling himself next to her. Propping her sleeping form up and against his chest he waited for a second for her to wake up. She only stirred and let her arms wrap loosely around his waist as though it was the most natural thing in the world. Her breathing was steadier then but she still shuddered.

Gently he pulled up her tunic and tugged her arms from their holes. He laid her back on her bedroll and gazed at her for a moment in her damp dark grey shirt. Folding up the Mindelan branded tunic he tucked it with the rest of her clothes. Taking a moment to steady himself he watched her before he quickly unlaced her breeches and tugged them off of her easily.

He sat there with her breeches in his lap, looking at her legs unwillingly. He bit his lips together. Some how, even though she wore breeches or leggings over them, Kel's legs were as tan as the rest of her. Must have gone swimming during the summer and…. He couldn't finish his thought. Kel moved in her sleep, turning on her side. Her knees were together, legs overlapping one another by the calf. Dom watched as her leg slid over the other as she stretched in her sleep, her knees breaking apart from each other.

Was it completely wrong for him to be getting hot watching one of his best friends sleep after he undressed her? Even if he loved her?

He looked down at his lap, disgusted with himself as he struggled to calm the blood rush going through his body. Dom folded her breeches and put them away before looking at her again. Seeing her in only a shirt and her loincloth was indescribable. She was so graceful it even seeped into her as she slept, make her every turn seem like a dance move.

Then he looked at her shirt only and chewed his lip. He had made it this far, might as well go all the way. Again Dom propped her up against his chest. Heat flooded him again as her skin touched his, when she sighed into his tunic in final content. He held her fantasizing, wishing, that that contentment was his doing. That just being in his arms was what was making it easier for her to rest.

Taking a breath he pulled her shirt over her head, leaving her bare to him in nothing but her breast band and loincloth. That was too much for him. He thought of war and famine fiercely. He thought of plagues and murder and rape, but nothing helped. He looked back at her, hot and heavy but cooled at her face. She was so peaceful now and he never wanted the smile that graced her lips to fade.

Laying her back he tucked her snuggly into her bedroll, fighting the urge to crawl in with her. To hold her longer and make sure her smile never left. She was his everything. She understood his needs. Dom could talk to her. She was the most giving and thoughtful person he knew. She was there when it was hard, and she made him feel important.

Dom admired everything about Kel. Her self-discipline and control fascinated him limitless. Her confidence and goals, her interests were compatible with his. Her optimism on life and people made him believe that life was worth living, people worth trusting.

He was watching her, leaning over her face and simply looking at her. Bits and parts of him were shredded and he felt something clog his throat, choking him. And he couldn't even tell her how she inspired him. How he loved her. It killed him, his job, hers. Both their occupations kept them apart for long periods of time, and his would never allow him to be close to her. He hated how Kel's mask kept him from her, and how both of them slept cold and alone at night.

He wanted her more then anything. He would give up the Own if she would have him. If she wanted a Knight he would get Raoul to convince the king to let him be taught even at his age. If she wanted a commoner he would drop his rank just to be with her. But Kel never showed any affection other then friendship, or even brotherly love. He wanted so much more, he wanted it all, but he couldn't have any of it. She wouldn't have him. She wouldn't have anyone.

That was her only boundary he hated. It made him so frustrated at times he caused physical violence, but never to her. Not her.

He was surprised when a tear shattered on Kel's cheek. Then he realized that it was a sob that was clogging his throat. He swallowed but it didn't go away. He was scared to open his mouth and another traitor's tear broke on Kel's face.

He had to get out of there.

Leaning down he softly cupped her cheek that was wet from his tears and kissed her forehead. A small smile spread over her face that made another tear roll from his eye and drip off his chin. He knew he shouldn't, that it would just make things harder, but he let himself believe that he was the cause of her fit-less state. For the moment that calmed the sob.

He stroked her cheek softly. "How can I love you?" he asked. This was too much. He stood, and with one last look to Kel left the tent. He bypassed the group of men around the bonfire not wanting to see his cousin and explain what took him so long. Instead he went to his own tent and stripped himself. Crawling into his bedroll sleep hit him hard.


	3. Chapter 3

The Arrival

Kel could see New Hope's walls just ahead, but she stayed with the company. It took all her will power not to kick Hoshi into a trot. She was so close now, and she could finally give her mind over to the numbing task of work. She had thought she was hiding her anxiousness well, but apparently not.

"Your heart's going to burst if you keep it up." Dom drawled. He seemed in a foul mood the past couple days. "We're almost there."

"We would get there sooner if the horses could move faster." Kel bit her lip looking at the mud and snow under them. They had to move their mounts carefully to not have them fall and break themselves or their owner. She had to admit, though, she didn't want to push Hoshi into an injury. "If we just didn't have such a messy terrain."

"It can't be that bad." He said with insolence and snorted. "It's just mud. We've tracked in it before."

"But you're not a horse Dom." Kel reminded him taken aback by his attitude. "It's a bit different."

"I bet I could race you through mud and win."

She looked at him. His face and voice were completely self-righteous but what he had said…it was so silly! "Dom-"

"I could," he interrupted her. She glared at him. "I could race you from here to New Hope, in the mud, and win."

"If it's a race you want, fine." She motioned for the whole company to stop and Raoul came to her side frowning. Before he could get two words in she slid from Hoshi and took off her over coat. Going through her saddle bags she pulled out a pair of leather shoes with laces that were more suitable for running then her boots. She put them on doing her best to not get mud on her feet and handed Hoshi's reins to Raoul who took them with confusion.

"Have someone lead Hoshi for me," she instructed him rather then asking. Raoul just blinked at her, stunned. Kel shrugged it off and turned to Dom who was still on his horse. "Well, get down here."

"Why?" he asked dumbly.

She bit the inside on her cheek in annoyance. "You questioned my skills Domitian of Masbelle." He visibly winced at the use of his full name. "Now we race, or would you like me to hit you with a glove first?"

"And it being Kel she would most likely swing too hard and break your nose," Raoul drawled once he had assessed the situation. He glared at the sergeant for being so dense and insulting Kel's skill.

Kel beamed at Raoul and turned back to Dom. He heaved a sigh and slid from his gelding's back. "Fine then," he muttered coming to her side as Neal took up Dom's reins and winked to Kel. Dom got into a running position. "Shall we start then?"

"Ready, set, go!" Kel yelled quickly and took off. She heard Dom yell '_cheat_' behind her but didn't stop. She focused on her breathing and steadiness not wanting to tire and slow down.

The sound of pounding feet came up behind her, but Kel did not increase her speed. Instead she let Dom get ahead on her. Ten feet or so ahead he looked back frowning. He began running backwards watching her, wondering why she wasn't trying to get ahead of him.

"Having a bad day?" she asked casually as she ran.

He dropped back to run at her side. "Not really," he huffed. It had taken a bit of energy to get ahead of her and run backwards. "I wouldn't call it that exactly."

"Then what's wrong?" she asked. He looked at her oddly, she sounded as though the running didn't affect her at all. She noticed him looking and laughed. "Wyldon always had us run the curtain wall. He cured me from running like I had a kimono on." She smiled at him before frowning again. "But what's wrong? Normally you're a great riding partner."

Great riding partner, he thought sourly. Another useless skill. "Nothing's wrong," he lied poorly. He had never let his infatuation with her affect their friendship before, but lately it was getting harder and harder to pretend it didn't hurt to be around her and just friendly. He wanted more; he wanted her to share what was happening to her with him. He couldn't stay with her forever, and he was scared for her when he wasn't there anymore. He wanted to be a bigger part of her life, more then a friend.

Kel hated the blank look on his face. Her normally happy friend looked truly miserable in her eyes, though she was sure no one else but for maybe Neal and Raoul would notice. She wanted him to smile again, would do anything to make him. Without thinking Kel tackled Dom into the mud.

Kel straddled his stomach while Dom looked up at her with big eyes. A mixture of feelings filled him, one being prompted mainly from her sitting on him as she was. "What was that for?" he asked.

Kel shrugged; face smooth though she felt like blushing. She stuck her finger in the mud and wiped the mud on the tip of Dom's perfect nose leaving behind a brown circle. Using it like finger paints she began drawing lines on his cheeks, not moving from where she sat on him.

Mud was seeping into Dom's shirt and getting in his hair, cold and dirty, but he never moved. He was scared to. Scared he would frighten Kel off him if he so much as twitched. She could be so skittish some times. It was funny really; a woman who killed mage devices would avoid an awkward moment like the plague. He laid there with his hands restrained to his sides so he wouldn't touch her, so he wouldn't pull her any closer to him. He watched her face as she drew lines on his with mud, not caring that she was getting him so dirty. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Making you into a kitty," she replied and smiled at him. She finished the whiskers on both of his cheeks and leaned back, looking at her work. Her eyes were shining with laughter. "You make an _adorable_ cat," she told him seriously.

Dom let himself get ahead of himself for once and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her down so she was lying on his chest with her nose touching his. Kel looked at him wide eyed in shocked and Dom could feel her heart beat through her chest. He savored it. _He_ made her react like that. Dom grinned and rolled so he was on top of Kel, straddling her as she had done to him.

Kel still watched Dom wide eyes as he got his finger muddy. The mud was cold she had to admit, but she didn't feel any of it. His skin was so warm and was pink from the heat. It turned her own skin pink. A pang went off just under her stomach and she wiggled trying to decrease the pressure.

Dom tisked her when she wiggled and grabbed her arms, holding them above her head in the mud. He had to move forward to do so and Kel swallowed hard when his face rested an inch from hers. Gods he was beautiful with his dark hair, even with mud in it. When she let out a strangled breath Dom's deep blue eyes grew misty.

His breath was hot as he spoke, burning her cheeks. "I can't let you get away with that." He smeared mud over her freckled nose grinning, and then drew whiskers on her cheeks. He pulled back his hand, still leaning forward on top of her. "Meow."

She smelt so good to him, even through the mud. Her scent was almost a bitter-sweat thing, a mixture of the Yamani teas she drank and the dried fruit she gave her birds. Dom didn't want to ever move, something about that smell was stimulating, but he saw her cheeks growing red. He loved the color, loved that he could make her do it, but suddenly he wasn't sure of himself. He was never sure of himself around Kel, a person who knew herself so well it almost made him jealous. Her eyes were still big, she was breathing shallowly, and even though it intoxicated him he wasn't sure that his presence did the same for her. He didn't want to just step over her values, even the ones he hated.

Kel shivered when Dom pulled himself off of her. She didn't want to talk, she didn't want to move. She had been staring again, and she knew it, but he stared too. She bit her lip and let him help her up. He was staring because you had mud on your face, she told herself glumly. To avoid his gaze she looked down at her tunic that clung to her from the mud and plucked it, stalling for time to control her mask. When she looked up her face was calm. She quirked a brow at him.

"You spend too much time with Meathead," Dom accused.

"Really," she tried to wipe the mud from the front of her tunic but just got her hands muddy. She looked at her hands with exasperation before smiling. It was just another reason to touch him.

When Kel wiped her hands clean on his sleeve Dom froze. Feeling his muscles tense she pulled back quickly flushed. It was stupid for her to take advantage of the moment; it just showed her immaturity and made them both awkward. She wanted to mount herself up as use as a quintain in embarrassment, to joust with Raoul so she could be thrown from the saddle. Any kind of self punishment for her display.

Evening her breathing she made herself sound casual, slipping a lock on her mask. "Ready to run? The company's going to catch up with use else wise."

Dom opened his mouth to tell her it was fine, that she could touch him all she wanted. That he _wanted_ her to, but he instantly closed it and nodded. Kel smiled weakly at him, and began to run again. He followed, keeping at her speed, staying at her side.

Silently they ran, each in their own thoughts. Kel's head spun. Great relationships are built on common ground, she thought, her mind ticking. Me and Dom have a great _friendship_. Even in her thoughts it hurt to say the word. It was worse then any of the words Joren had said to her in her page and squire years. We have similar interests and I always enjoy being around him. He seems to like doing things with me well enough. We talk about most of the things that happen to us, I _like_ talking to him. It easier then it even is with Neal. I never can get bored with Dom. He's too interesting.

She looked over at Dom. He was in his mood again, looking blankly forward. Kel frowned. How could he change back so quickly? He had been smiling and painting her face with mud no more then five minutes ago. His face could make a Yamani seem expressive, but he was still devastatingly handsome in his muddy uniform. Her heart saddened at the empty expression.

Not for the first time Kel wondered what it would be like for them to be more then friends. To actually be together. It wasn't a completely ludicrous idea, but for the fact that he wasn't attracted to her romantically. We have similar values, she noted mentally. Similar priorities. Dom has always respected my values and beliefs. He respects my boundaries, though he does like to tiptoe on them. He doesn't ask me to be anybody but myself, never prompted me to change. She swallowed. That was what made their friendship so strong, but if they were together…it could be great. She loved him for himself and he her, but he liked her as a friend.

Kel took a deep breath and pushed back the thought. The knowledge that she could be happy with Dom, but never would was no good. There was no point in making herself depressed. She was almost to the fort.

Her heart picked back up when she remembered and she increased her speed. Dom accelerated as well, but pants began to tare from his chest. Kel looked over to him, a smile breaking across her face. "Low stamina, Sergeant?" she asked, eyebrow raised.

Dom's eyes nearly fell from his head. Kel, Keladry of Mindelan, just made an implication. Not just that but she made it to him about his _bed manners_. He was shocked, but he loved the flash of teeth as she grinned, cherished how she laughed at his stunned face. His frozen demeanor melted a little. He couldn't be unaffected by her when she was smiling at him, it had been hard enough to keep himself distant the past few days. When she spoke with him he would try and ignore her words, ignore her laughing at Meathead, do everything he could to not think about her.

It hadn't worked one bit and his heart felt like exploding the entire time, causing him physical pain.

"Keladry!" he yelped. She continued to laugh at him as she ran, making her side begin to ache from her over worked abs. Dom was grinning again and she was proud of her work. She couldn't have a depressed sergeant.

"What?" she asked all innocence. She shrugged in her running. "You, Wolset, Fulcher, even Qasim and Lerant and the rest of the Own say things like that to each other all the time."

"We're men!" she laughed at him harder.

"And I'm just one of the guys." She told him to his displeasure. He frowned at her. Did she really think that? Did she really not notice that some of the men had looked at her as a woman rather then an authority figure? Had Neal never told her of the time they had been in a fight for catching a new recruit oggaling her? How Neal wouldn't let Dom hurt the man?

He snorted, trying to sound casual as he said, "Well, you're an extremely beautiful man. Of course, not as beautiful as you are as a woman."

Dom drank in her blush, but it was gone all too quickly. "Didn't you get all the flirting out of your system at Mid Winter?" Kel asked with a calm and slightly amused face. Dom soured inside. And there was her mask again, not only blocking out her expression but his pleasure. That was how it always was between him and Kel. It was like smelling a sweet but never tasting it. It drove him mad.

"It's a never ending supply, Lady." He informed her. Kel picked up speed when New Hope came closer into view, allowing them to spot men on the walls. He had to work to keep up with her. It wasn't as bad as racing Neal who had horse blood, but it still was torture. He gasped out his next sentence. "It's one of the resources that never runs low."

Kel laughed at him and Dom felt like passing out in exhaustion just listening to her. She was so happy to be back, he loved her joy, but did she have to be so chipper when running? She still didn't even seem affected. "And what did you do," she asked, "before I was a squire in the Own? Which of the men did you flirt with?"

"Raoul-said-I- was-a good-flatterer." He huffed. Kel just laughed and picked up more speed.

The forts gates were opened when they reached them and both Kel and Dom ran straight in. Immediately Dom stopped and sat down in a snow bank, laboring to breathe. Kel chuckled at him. "Gave you a run for your money, didn't I Dom."

"Yes," he said through gasps.

"Kel!" Dom looked up to see a group of small children running over to them. He noticed a few of them from before who Keladry had conversed with. They ran over to her, dropping the snow they had been playing with from their hands. She bent down to her knees bringing herself to their level and allowed them to tackle her with hugs and kisses, squealing with delight and begging for piggyback rides. Absently he noticed most of them were little girls who looked at her with eyes full of admiration.

Kel laughed. She would miss them all when she was ordered to leave. It was one of the best parts of New Hope. Standing up again Kel picked up a little blond girl who had been watching her and balanced her on her hip. She didn't remember the face or brown eyes, so she thought to introduce herself. "Tell me," she said lightly to the girl. "Have there been any attacks since I've been gone? I haven't heard a thing."

The little girl shook her head. "Na'ah. They still won't let us play outside the walls alone, but no bad men have came."

Kel nodded. "Good report missy, you would make an excellent Rider." The girl beamed at her.

"Not trying to recruit another one of them, are you?" Kel turned to glare at Dom who was still lounging in the snow. He grinned and shrugged at her. "You don't think the queen put the idea in every little girl she greets? You don't need to spread the water, Mother. It can do it itself."

She scowled at him and poked out her tongue. The little girl looked to Dom then Kel. "Why are you covered in mud?" Reaching out she grabbed Dom's nose, wiping off the mud smear there. "You look like kitties."

"I'd say so," a voice said. Both Kel and Dom looked up and Kel set the little girl down. The children ran off to continue playing. Raoul came over to them as a hostler took Drum and the Own lead their horses to the stables. Raoul pinched Dom's cheek making the other man scowl. "I always thought you looked kittenish."

Dom smacked Raoul's hand away and pointed accusingly at Kel. "She did it."

"Tell me you didn't like it." She retorted and his stomach sank a bit. Oh, he did like it. Too, too much. Kel looked away from him at Raoul who studied her muddy face taking in the whiskers.

"And I suppose you got your payback, Dom?"

"Not nearly enough," he grinned and looked Kel over. She shivered. His face gave away nothing but impish intentions, and she was beginning to wish Raoul didn't have to leave. Dom looked as though he was ready to stir up some trouble.

Raoul seemed to notice and scowled at Dom. "I want to talk with the men after dinner in an hour." He told the sergeant sternly. "Go tell them."

Dom pouted for a moment and sulked off to do so with a final wink to Kel. Raoul turned back to her and raised both his brows. She shrugged. She didn't understand Dom's behavior today either. Raoul grinned at her. "You might want to come too. It might be informational. You will have to keep a close eye on them."

She nodded. "I'll come by the barracks after dinner. Till then if someone asks for me I'm off for the baths and will be writing a report in my rooms till dinner."

Like Raoul had promised the meeting with the Own after dinner was _informational_. After dinner Kel and Neal both entered the Own's barracks and were hit by a storm of rolled up clothes made to act as snowballs. "Alright, stop." Kel demanded when they didn't immediately cease. A smaller cloth flew and landed on her head, unrolled. Calmly Kel pulled in off and looked at it. Her face dropped and she threw the loincloth at Neal. "Guys, gods that's disgusting!"

"Ah, come on Keladry." Wolset swept her up and began spinning her. "We're just having fun. Celebrating coming back to New Hope."

"Put me down." Kel demanded. Her head was spinning and she didn't want to throw up her meal. Wolset set her down and grinned before heading back to a game of cards he had been winning. Kel looked around. Already the barracks were a mess of clothes and papers. The men huddled together making bets and playing cards. The room roared with conversation and she looked over to Neal who looked stunned. The men should have been tired from the ride. They shouldn't be joking and fighting as they were.

Neal shrugged and joined a group of men who were occupying a cluster of beds, perched on the headboards and where ever else there was room. She followed Neal, curious of the group.

There was money laid out on a bed in the middle, separated in piles. Most of it was coppers, but she did see a silver or two in the piles. "Midnight, on the Own's roof, all night." Fulcher was looking directly at Dom who eyed the piles of money.

"Two?" he asked referring to the piles. Fulcher nodded and Dom brushed his hand over his chin and the bristles of dark hair that showed he needed a shave. Considering it for a moment longer he grinned at all the men. "Deal. How much would that equal to all together?"

"Twenty-five coppers, three silvers." Fulcher measured, counting through two of the piles.

"What are they betting on?" Kel asked Qasim.

The Bazhir looked around at her and grinned. "If Masbelle can sleep on the barrack roofs all night. You know how cold it gets so far north in the winter." Kel frowned. Normally the Own's challenges for one another were more difficult. Qasim noticed her questioning look. "He also has to do it naked with one blanket."

"You're getting greedy Dom," Fulcher accused. "You already have three silvers. That's one more then anyone else in the bets."

Dom was sitting on the edge of the bed closet to the money. His face was even smugger then it had been when he claimed he could beat Kel in a foot race. "I have expenses Fulcher. I still don't have a proper amount of clothes since the last time you burned them." He glared at the man. Fulcher looked at him blankly, eyes of an innocent.

"But if we didn't burn them, you would just find them. That wouldn't be fun."

"I'll put two silvers against him." Kel said, tossing the money to Fulcher who caught it grinning at her then the money in his hands. Kel grinned back. "There's no way he'll be up there all night."

"Commander!" Dom looked at her like his heart had been ripped from his chest. "Lady Keladry, how can you have such low standards for me?"

"Because I know you." She laughed as he feigned sorrow. "Plus-"

"Quiet men," Raoul had come. Quickly Fulcher swept the money into separate leather sacks he pulled from inside a pillowcase and stashed the bundles under the mattress. Raoul moved over to the center of the room and the other men obediently surrounded him, hiding the money they were betting and brandy they drank. Raoul saw, it wasn't hard, but never mentioned anything. Kel caught his eyes and quirked a brow. He simply smiled.

"They're like children," he informed her when she came to his side. "You have to let them get away with some things."

"You mean you purposely let them off their leashes and into my fort?" Kel asked her old Knight Master.

"Exactly." He turned to his men. "As you know, I'm leaving you to the commander of the fort." He nodded to Kel and a few men gave their whoops, clapping their hands. Raoul cut into their celebration, "And I've advised her to be on her toes. To keep you on yours." To that they booed playfully.

"Quiet," Raoul demanded and it was instantly so. "You need to remember the boundaries as usual. Follow the normal rules and others since I'm not here to punish you properly." A few of the men grinned at that fact, and Kel wasn't sure if she wanted to take them on anymore. Having extra soldiers was always great, but this didn't seem like extra protection.

"Rule number one, no hurting Kel. No placing Kel in a potentially dangerous situation, she can find them on her own just fine without your help. No throwing Kel or any other refugee out the windows or over the fort walls." He looked at Dom and his friends frowning. "No getting Kel drunk or intoxicated. Refrain from destroying the fort. No burning or blowing up anything of importance and don't torture or patronize any of your fellow company men. I hope I have covered all bases, oh, and don't kill anyone unless they come at you with a sword, please. I think that's it."

Kel froze. Now she was sure she didn't want Raoul to leave. Were they really that bad? "Your curfew is to be in the barracks by two. You're big boys and I'll let you stay up as late as you want as long as you get your work done in the morning, but you have to be back here by two." He paused for a moment, thinking over what he was about to say before he did so. "Since Flyn is traveling to Giant-killer with me and Lerant that leaves Dom at the highest rank, under Kel's watch of course." Kel looked over to Dom. He was smiling roguishly at her and she looked away quickly. She was going to need help with them, she was sure. Neal and Merric were both at the camp with her, but she wasn't sure if that was enough.

"Hopefully he wont screw this up." Neal drawled quietly to Kel at her side. She smothered a laugh.

Raoul nodded to them, said a farewell and that he needed sleep before leaving. Neal followed him out, but Kel stuck around for a bit longer. She talked with the men, assessing what they had planned. She was in way over her head. Silently she preyed to the Mother for help with them. It seemed only the gods, and Raoul, could control this bunch.

She left once she began realized that none of the men had any intentions of going to bed. They would be tired tomorrow. Dom followed her out, not listening when he brain told him to sit back down and have Fulcher recount his bets. He fell at her side as she walked through the dark camp. "What's your first command, Lady?" he asked.

She scowled at him. "Don't call me that."

"Fine, _commander_," Dom corrected himself, though he preferred to call her Lady. It was his unconventional way of flirting with her without her really detecting it. "What're my orders?" he asked again.

Kel thought for a bit. Obviously she hadn't really thought of any job for him to do so quickly. There really wasn't much work for her to have him do at night. She sighed. "Just try to have the men get some sleep while Milord is gone."

"I'll work on that," he promised, grinning. His face fell fast into a serious look that didn't suit him. "And if you could do me a favor." Kel looked at him, waiting. "Go to bed tonight and sleep. Lock your door too and keep Jump with you if you can find him on your way to your rooms. Shut the shutters and lock them-"

"Why would I need to do any of this Dom?" Kel interrupted.

"Some of the men are-"

"If they're that rowdy then maybe I should have a talk with them." She interrupted him again. "I don't want you all plaguing my fort and playing with the refugees. They have work in the morning too."

"Please let me finish Kel." Dom chuckled. Kel flushed at the sound and nodded, covering her liking for his laugh with her mask. Dom scowled seeing it slip into place. "Some of the men are happy to see Milord leave us to your care." He said it as if she was babysitting them like her nephews. "That might inspire some pranks. Nothing real dangerous, but it's a good thing to avoid. With Raoul gone they'll want someone other then each other to harass."

"Are there any other warnings I'll be needing?" Kel asked sarcastically.

"Not a warning really more of a request." Dom grinned at her in the dark. She looked at him. "When you look out your window tonight, don't look at the barrack's roof. It's bad enough I have to do it, and that you bet against me." He looked at her again in mock hurt and Kel laugh.

Reluctantly Dom whispered to her a goodnight and headed back to the barracks. Kel went to her rooms and did as he asked, but for having Jump with her. He must still be with the men, she thought as she opened her window for the sparrows. They were just as good as a guard dog. She locked her window again and crawled into her bed. She lie there awake, because she was scared of what she would see when her lids closed.

But Dom had asked her to sleep. Unwillingly Kel closed her eyes and let the terrifying nightmares begin. A spear punctured her heart as she welcomed the images into her mind, letting them bombard her with memories and old possibilities. She let her head fill with sharp cries that she had heard over and over but never was able to stop. Slowly she fell into her own mental war.


	4. Chapter 4

Sick in More than One Way

Kel sat up in bed; her gasps curdled together causing her to choke. Her nose burned and her nasal cavity was completely cleared by her hot salty tears. Her entire face ached, and sometimes she wondered if crying hurt more then battle wounds themselves. It sure seemed that way.

A scream cut into her skull and she covered her ears only to have the shrill voice increase in its pitch. Her heart iced over and parts shattered off. The broken bits mixed with her bloodstream and flowed through her body, cutting her from the inside. Pain splintered out from her core and her brow broke out in a sweat. She knew the pain wasn't real, that she was just reliving other pains from over the years as a page, squire, and Knight, but that didn't stop the constant cutting and invisible scars.

Moving around a little Kel felt the sheets chafe against her back and groaned. She had sweated through them in her sleep and they would need to be changed again. The sparrows were perched on the headboard and chirping softly in concern. Kel groaned once again as an unreal icicle shattered into her just above her heart, filling her with shivers. Though she was trembling in the painful cold, her hands burned like they were coated in blazebalm.

She knew she couldn't lie in bed any longer, letting the ice slither through her. The sparrows were getting upset, and she needed to get up before her sleep deprived mind drew her back to the dreams that caused the ice. Pulling herself up was painful, but she did it. After a moment Kel balanced herself on her feet and moved to grab her glaive. Weighing it in her hands she started a dance.

Spinning it in her hands she made sure her every step was perfect, focusing her mind only on her physical body and the weapon at hand. Deftly she sliced through the air and thrust the pointed blade out to invisible enemies. Using her shoulders she put more force behind her blows and picked up speed. She swung down as if to sweep an opponent's legs out from under them and came back up, making a center stab. Her muscles flexed as she shifted from defensive to offensive. As she settled into the familiar dance she focused on her breathing and her muscles as they tightened and loosened, producing heat for her frozen body.

By the time she had finished light was cracking through her shutters and she was covered with even more sweat, dripping with it. Shaking her head it splashed onto the sparrows that cheeped at her with the indignity. Kel smiled to them before putting her glaive back up on the wall. Running her hand, that quivered from exhaustion and trauma from her night's rest, through her hair she moved into her washroom and found a bath drawn for her. By the steam that rose from it she could tell it was still warm.

As she sank into the water Kel fixed her eyes on the ceiling rather then closing them. Raoul would be off by midday and she was panicked over how to deal with the men. It was silly, she had been with the Own when she was a squire and they had been at New Hope and Haven before. There was no reason for her to be anxious. Raoul was just trying to frighten her.

She flicked the water with her finger as she assessed what she would need to do that day to finish her for report Lord Wyldon. She perked up when she realized she would have to review the entire camp, going over the damage they had sustained since her departure a month back. She would be able to hand herself over to the numb emotionless work. She would be able to separate her body from her mind.

With that in mind she quickly dressed and dried her hair. After cleaning her teeth and brushing her hair out of its snarls she let the sparrows out. The sun had already lit the sky multiple colors, but had yet to break over the battlements. Some people were already up and about, making their way to the mess. Grabbing her sword belt Kel did the same.

When she walked into the mess she was shocked to see half the Own with their breakfast. She had partially expected them to sleep through the first meal. Grabbing food from the cooks who greeted her kindly Kel went and sat with them. When she took a seat on the long bench Fulcher grinned at her and slid four silver coins to tap against her plate.

"How long did he last?" Kel asked as she slipped the coins into her belt purse. She would have to remember to have a messenger bring them to Corus with a letter for Tobe. He probably needed extra spending money for treats when Stefan let him ride some of the horses through the city.

A plate hit the table harshly across from her and she looked up to see Dom scowling at the other men. "Not even three hours." Fulcher chuckled. "When he came back he was blue. It took an hour of sitting in front of the fire place to get him to even twitch a finger."

Kel scowled at Dom. "You could have killed yourself," she scolded him. His eyes were half lidded and his grip on the fork in his hand loose. She reached out and pressed her hand to his forehead. It was borderline hot. "Dom, you may have to see Neal. You don't want this to progress into anything."

Without thinking Dom closed his eyes all the way and pressed his face into her hand, making it slip to cup his cheek. "I'm fine," he fibbed. His internal organs felt like they were cooking, but he didn't want to admit it. Admit that he had purposely sat out in a drift of snow with no clothes on.

Kel moved her hand from his bristled cheek and lightly held his chin, pleading for him to look at her with the touch. Hesitantly he opened his bloodshot eyes and met hers. Even in his state he noticed how the dreamers glimmering fog they had to them didn't vanish even in her sleep ridden state. Her hazel eyes drooped in the corners slightly in unrest. When he looked closely he saw that the skin under her eyes was somewhat puffy, and her bottom lid a little red. Had she been crying? Or was it just another reaction from little sleep?

"Gods Dom," Kel breathed. His face was so pale he could have been suffering from blood lose. She could feel his pulse hammering out of tempo against her fingers. He looked tired, and sick, and tender to the touch. It wasn't the normal feel of the sergeant. Her friend never looked so weak to her.

Dom visibly slumped in disappointment as Kel pulled back her warm fingers. It was so hard to be friends. His simply touching her made his heart ache for days, and he wondered what her affect of touching him would leave him. He would dream about her fingers tonight; that was for sure. His mind would baffle over the long, gentle fingers of a hand with white scars that formed a tattoo worthy of the gods. A hand that read the history of her life in an ancient script she alone could read.

"You know what," Kel picked up both of their plates, pulling the fork from his hand and resting it next to his food. "We can eat in the infirmary. I want you to have some healer look at you." Kel stood up from her spot on the bench in a fluid motion making it scarcely possible to tell she could collapse any moment into a harsh sleep. She came to his side and nudged him with her knee, urging him to get up as he looked blankly forward, shivering from the contact and rising fever. "Come on," she nudged him again and Dom bite his tongue hard. Her touch burned at the same time as it cooled him with a tingling feeling. "I won't let you eat till you see a healer." She warned.

One more time, he told himself as he sat ridged, giving away no signs that he planned on moving. Just one more time and I'll get up. I'll give in. "Why should I, Mother? I'm perfectly fine here. Just a little hot."

Kel pressed her thigh harder into his side since she couldn't hit him, and also just to touch him. The air was sucked from Dom's lungs. That was it; he had pushed his strengths too far. The consequences for letting her touch his face was simply a recurring fantasy, but for letting her touch him with a body part that was so close to being private would cause him dreams that would leave him aching in the mornings. The kind of dreams the men could never learn he had.

She pressed her hip into him now harder then she did her leg and he rocketed from his seat. "Fine," he choked hoarsely. He didn't even try to cover it with a cough or sneeze. She would just assume it was from the fever he was developing. He clumsily detangled his legs from the bench as the other men laughed at his pale skin and lead feet. Kel glared at them. It wasn't right for them to find his amusing in his condition.

Dom ambled slowly at Kel's side as he followed her to the infirmary, willing to draw the walk out as long as possible. "I should start calling you Meathead." Kel mumbled and shook her head. "This is my fault. I should have stopped the betting instead of actually betting against you. I should have locked you all in the barracks and forced you into extra layers just incase. Now you have a fever and we'll have to merge your squad with Aiden's-"

"Kel," he interrupted. "I think my corporals can handle things for a while on their own and it's just a fever. Neal's Baird's son. A small fever, he can take care of that in a minute." His chuckle was throaty and slightly torn. "Only you can blame yourself for something that was completely my fault."

"I'm commander, I'm watching these people inside the fort and that includes you men. I can't just let you run around and kill yourselves." She stopped herself when she felt clammy fingers under her chin.

He was going to dream about touching her face that night anyways. The feeling of her hand on his face was going to plague him, but he couldn't stop himself as he reached out and made her look at him. Her smooth warm skin burned his fingers as he turned her head. He did his best to stay calm and natural when he looked her in the eye, meeting her exquisite stare evenly, but when he opened his mouth his voice cracked like a pre-pubescent. "Technically me and the men are not part of the fort. Just an extension. You don't need to take care of us. Like Raoul said," he grinned crookedly at her but didn't really putting himself in the gesture, "we're big boys."

Kel nearly dropped the plates she was holding just looking at him. Pulling away her chin she started walking again. Slowly Dom followed. The infirmary was nearly empty, and just as she was hoping Kel spotted Neal through the open door leading to his office. Waving off a young trainee healer she demanded Dom to lay on one of the empty cots. Grumbling he did and she set both their plates on a table stand next to the bed.

"Neal?" she knocked on his open door.

"Yes…?" He finished reading the last sentence from the book he held. He glanced up and dropped his book, loosing the page. He turned his look form her and glared at the now closed book before looking her way again. "What brings you down here so soon? Isn't it a bit early for me to be patching up your bones?" He looked her over and cocked a brow. "You seem fine."

"Your cousin brings me here." She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned back, letting him see Dom on the cot. "Can you give his a look at? He doesn't seem well."

"Now you finally see where I'm coming from." He got up and stood next to her in the door frame, looking at his sick cousin. He shrugged, looking indifferent. "Sorry, but I've worn low lately." He faked a yawn and Kel glared at him. "My dear cousin will have to do his healing himself."

"Come on Neal." Kel growled in exasperation. "You did a full physical on me after you found out Wyldon kissed my forehead. Dom sat out in the cold naked for three hours and is your blood-kin. As a knight and a healer you're sworn to help him. Remember the vows we took all through or training-"

"You're worse then the Lioness," Neal huffed and walked to his cousin. Kel followed. "And The Stump's kiss could have been laced with poison. I was looking out for you. Some gratitude!"

"Stop squawking, Meathead." Dom held his suddenly pounding head. "I agree with your father, I wish I could tie your tongue in knots."

"I've told you, that's insubordination." He scoffed. "It's Sir Meathead. Now, what's this I hear about you sitting outside naked?"

"Neal you were there last night. You know exactly what happened." Kel levered Dom, who had propped himself up on his elbows, back down to rest on his pillow. The touch sent his body aching again. "He's getting a fever and probably is tired. Fulcher said it took a while for him to start moving again."

"How long?" Neal asked, all teasing gone from his tone. He began pulling away Dom's shirt and rested a hand on his cousin's forehead, then on his bare chest over his heart. Coolness flooded though him and his eyes fluttered shut, trusting Neal wouldn't hurt him.

"Little over two hours to begin moving again, and an hour to get to sleep." Dom mumbled as pressure pulled behind his eyes. Sleep began to clog his throat and he shifted to keep himself awake.

"And you sat out there for three hours?" Neal asked. Dom and Kel both nodded. Neal thought as he worked as did Kel. Kel had left the barracks around nine which meant if Dom went out right after she left he never slept till either three or four hours past midnight. She chewed her lip. He hadn't gotten more then two or three hours of sleep. That wouldn't help his fever.

Dom opened his eyes and looked up at Kel as Neal pulled back. There was the sweetest sadness in her eyes and he knew she was still blaming herself for his stupid behavior. He didn't want her to feel responsible for something that had nothing to do with her, but he didn't want to look to fade either. It made it so much easier to imagine. It made the dreams feel real for a while, that that sadness wasn't just a friends concern.

"You're an idiot, Dom." Neal's voice cut through Kel's sad look and she glared at him. Dom glared as well at his cousin for cutting his fantasy short. Neal talked to both Dom and Kel. "You strained you circulatory system, having it try to pump more blood to warm your muscles. Your body can't take much stress and needs rest. I want you in here rather then the barracks. You need quiet and sleep." He left to get something from his office.

Kel met Dom's eyes and the melodic look of concern was etched into her face again. Dom struggled to sit up once more and she rushed to his side to help him. "I can do it mys-" He cut himself off when she gave him a warning look. Grudgingly Dom let her prop a pillow behind him and another that she had grabbed from the neighboring bed. "Kel, really," he insisted but didn't know what to say to put her at ease. She stepped back when he was sitting up right. Dom sighed. "Thanks."

Neal came back. He pressed a mug of tea in Dom's hand and instructed him to drink it. Dom, knowing healers, pinched the bridge of his nose and quickly drank down the liquid. Neal snatched back the mug from him when it was drained. "It wasn't that bad." He snapped. "I just gave you something mild for your head."

"You liquidized horse manure." Dom accused in a choked voice. Neal seethed at him before snapping at him to lie back down. Dom didn't refuse Kel's help this time and took the moment to appreciate the sizzling feeling that spread up his spin from her hands on his bare back. Her concerned face never changed and he was relieved that, for the moment, she had thrown her mask aside. He let her feel his face again checking the fever, let her trail her hands down his neck to see if she could catch his pulse, let her brush her fingers over his chest to feel his full body heat. He knew his body gave evident signs of his pleasure, his chest had grown warmer and his nipples hard, his eyes were glazed and his heart began to hammer. He didn't try to stop her, couldn't. Dom just relied on Kel's inexperience with men that she couldn't tell. "You're worrying." He murmured, voice husky from the added on heat she caused him. "Don't be."

"He's right," Neal looked at Kel. Quickly she pulled her roaming fingers back disappointing both Dom and herself. "He'll only have to stay here the day and the night. A couple more teas and sleep and he'll be the same as usual tomorrow." He looked at his cousin then. "Sleep," he demanded and Dom immediately closed his eyes.

"I've work to do." Kel murmured and stepped out.

She was back at the infirmary a little while after midday with a plate for Dom incase he had woken up. He hadn't and all the healers had cleared out, still hanging around close enough so they would know if they were needed. Little activity was happening at the fort due to the flurry of snow that was falling. She had only been able to see Raoul off and check the battlements merlon. She saw a few cracks but not many. They already had the material to fix them, but she still planned on putting it in her report. She didn't like to leave anything out and Wyldon wanted thorough reports.

Kel was sitting on a cot next to Dom's bed writing out notes for her report when she heard a moan. She looked up at Dom, setting down her quill. He moaned again and shifted in the small bed. She watched him for a second more. He continued to shift and turn, but didn't make another sound. She turned back to her report. He moaned again and began to twist under the covers as his moans continued to get louder. He groaned with his eyes still shut. His legs stretched out, pulling the sheet and coverlet off of his chest to leave it to the cold air. His back arched slightly and he was gripping the corners of the mattress, his fingers gone white. His entire body strained with a built up pressure.

It wasn't till Kel moved closer to him did he scream. The yell echoed through the empty room and Kel rushed to his side, kneeling down next to the bed and pulling at his hands to let the mattress go while she called his name. His body went ridged for a moment before shuttering. "Dom," she said, moving closer to his head, looking down at him. She squeaked in surprise when his eyes snapped open, staring her down with a hollow hunger. "Dom," she whispered again, not knowing what to do. There were no healers around. Should she get one? But she didn't want to leave him like this. He was panting heavily, covered in sweat, and slightly pink.

To her surprise he lifted a quivering hand and cupped her cheek, stroking her face softly with his thumb. His eyes still had their hollow look, but began to glitter faintly. "Dom," she found she was only capable of a whisper. It didn't matter. He was so close to her he would catch her words. "Dom, are you alright?"

"More then," he whispered back. He followed the line of her jaw, stroking two fingers back and forth in a soft touch. His hand traveled down her neck, fingers brushing over her collarbone. His hand stopped abruptly and he glared at the lacings of her shirt. Dom ripped his hand back and sat upright, looking around frantically. He looked down at the bed he was in like he didn't remember ever laying down. Suddenly his eyes widened as he realized something and he looked down at Kel, his eyes pleading something she didn't understand.

"You screamed Dom." Was all she could think to say.

Dom stared at her. She was looking back at him without her mask on. He took his time to speak. Slowly he took in her wide shocked eyed, feeding from the emotion he could see flicking across her face. Fear, concern, sadness, all at once mixed with something he couldn't detect precisely. He took in them all greedily. Her emotions, all of them, were a treat to him. Seeing her real face was his obsession. His mind froze for a moment before backtracking. His dream, Kel…. He looked down at the sheets over his legs again and moved. He had discarded his breeches before he had fallen completely asleep, and he felt something slippery and warm over and between his legs. Panic hit him hard. No, not now! Not with her right next to him, staring at him. His head snapped back to Kel and he winced. She had said something.

"Wha- what?"

"You screamed in your sleep Dom. Are you alright?" She reached out a hand and pushed back his sweaty hair, feeling his forehead. His skin was scorching, but not for the reason she thought. She moved closer and cupped his cheek in her hands, trying to make him look at her while she wiped away the sweat. He shuttered in her hands from what he had seen behind his lids seconds ago. The thoughts of her, of them, made it hard to stand her touch. It made him want to hold her down and press his lips to every part of her, starting with her own. He met her eyes and choked back a whine seeing the sweet sadness back. It was like salted sugar. Kel stared back at his hollow eyes. "You were thrashing a bit too and clutching the bed. What happened?"

Gods no. He had yelled. He had actually made noise. Dom started breathing heavily and unreasonably. He was broken. He would never be able to sleep without making a noise. It was going to be impossible with the men. Dom wanted to punch himself for the stupidity. He had let himself have one touch too many. Now was his time to start paying.

"Dom?" Kel asked. She could see something sour pass over Dom's mind. She stroked his cheek with her thumb as he had done to her when he woke up, scratching her skin on his forming whiskers. "Please tell me."

"Nightmare." He croaked out, knowing she'd believe the lie.

He was right. Kel's face dropped in concern. She removed her hands from his face and sat on the corner of his bed. Without hesitation she wrapped her arms around his shoulders giving him a hug like he had to her at Mid Winter. She didn't want that for her friend. Not what she had to go through. It was bad enough for one person. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No," he said quickly. She was too close. A few more inches and she would be sitting on the evidence of what he had really been dreaming of. He felt like the truth was written on his body, that its odor clung in the air and any moment she would detect it. "Not unless you share yours."

Kel pulled back and looked at him, brow furrowed. She couldn't tell him though she wanted to. She already had two shoulders to carry the burden. She didn't need four, and she couldn't explain the dreams precisely and have them sound average. First of all he would think she was mad for feeling imaginary pain, second for the things she had seen. He was a warrior, seen battle and death, but she just wasn't sure if he saw it the same way_ she_ did, if it wasn't just different for her because she was The Girl. Out of all her knight friends she never heard one of them mention night terrors like hers. Even the Lioness.

"Dom-"

"No," he interrupted. "It has to be fair, Kel."

Kel stood from the bed to his relief and sorrow, taking a step back. "I'm going to find Nealan. He probably has another tea for you somewhere." She told him and hurried out before he could object. Dom flopped back on the cot and closed his eyes, wondering how he was going to explain this to his cousin. He was going to find out, Dom couldn't stop that. He glared at the ceiling in a slow torture as he let his embarrassment burn color into his cheeks.

Neal walked into the room not long after Kel left with her at his side. He looked at his cousin for no longer then a second before heading to his office again to fix him another concoction. Kel sat down on the cot where she had left her notes and watched Dom who blankly looked off. He visibly tensed noticing she wasn't collecting her things to leave and Neal came back into the room. It was obvious he could feel the anxiety between the two by his frown.

Neal handed the brew to his cousin and he gave an odd look as Dom adjusted the blankets around him before taking the cup. He had scooted forward as if to cover something. "So, Kel said you had a nightmare?" he asked conversationally. He watched as Dom's grip on the cup tightened and Kel's face slipped into her mask.

"Yes." He took a swallow from the mug and gagged as a reflex to the acidy tea rolling down his throat. He glared at the black liquid. "What rancid fowl did you squeeze this from?" he asked Neal seriously.

Neal ignored the comment. "Care to share?"

"This?" he held out the tea to his cousin. "You can have it all if you want, Meathead."

"I meant your nightmare Domitan." Neal let his nerves get the better of him and snapped at the man who looked blankly at him. "You're thicker then the battlements, you know that?"

"No, I didn't cousin." Dom took another sip from the mug and drank it down with a few choking sounds. He pressed the mug back into his bitter cousin's hands and looked at him expectantly. "Was that all you needed?"

"Dom-" Kel opened her mouth.

"You know my pretenses, Lady Knight." He whispered hotly, cutting off her plea. Looking at her Dom only saw her mask, her face blank and calm. "Fair's fair. When you tell me I'll tell you."

"You know I can't do that-"

"You can't?" He asked stiffly. "I always thought you had some capability of speech Kel. Why can't you sleep at night? Why is it you wince every time the talking stops or you have nothing in your hands?" he nodded down to her hand that was clutching the quill. She dropped it instantly. "Tell me why you never leave your sword behind anymore? Why you insist on bringing it to meetings and even meals with friends?" He paused for a second to breathe. "Why were groaning in your sleep back on the rode when I put you in your tent? Why did you wake up crying and holding yourself in Corus?"

Her mask didn't waver. "No reason."

"Maggot's arse!" he spat. "I'm your friend Kel, you can tell me. How long has it been? Through your squire years, with you to Scanra? You still don't trust me!"

"Dom you're sounding like Neal." Uncontrollably her mask slipped and he could see pain flash briefly in her eyes. "What about you, Dom? You're not tell-"

"I will!" He grabbed her arm impulsively and tugged her off the other cot, pulling her so she was on her knees on the floor, closer to him. Her papers spilt to the floor along with her quill. The ink wobbled on the table but didn't fall over. He moved his grip from her arm and took on ink stained hand. "I'll tell you exactly what I dreamt if you tell me what your nightmares are. If you let me help." He waited, but when she gave no answer his gripped tightened. "You're worrying us all sick Kel! Your friends. We all want to help."

Coldly Kel pulled her hand back and turned her back from him, collecting her papers. Standing again she had her mask in place. "I'm sorry Dom, but I don't quite understand." She nodded to him and clapped Neal on the shoulder as if nothing had happened. A horn called outside and she looked out the door. The gate was being raised. "Yuki must be here early Neal. Probably finished packing and left not long after us." She stepped out of the infirmary saying faintly that she would greet his fiancées party.

Neal stood motionless for a moment, wanting to see Yuki but frozen for the time being. He looked at him cousin. "That was…" he fumbled. "Bad."

"You think?" Dom snapped. He flopped back on the bed again and hit his head on the wall doing so. He wrinkled his face. "Sir Meathead, would it be alright if I changed beds?"

"Why?"

Dom's face heated noticeably. "The sheets are dirty." Neal frowned and stepped forward, pulling back the blankets from the stop where Dom had pulled them. His jaw dropped and he looked to Dom, then back at the sheets. "Yeah," Dom mumbled, getting up quickly and pulling on his breeches.

"You… you-"

"Yes Meathead?" Dom growled.

Neal scrunched his face up in disgust. "Dom, I hope you know sick people are treated here. It's not an ideal place to have wet dreams." He pointed to the bed. "Strip the sheets and put them in the basket over their. If it happens again-"

"It wont."

"If it does," Neal went on. "You'll have to clean them yourself." He watched his cousin quizzically as he pulled the sheets from the bed. "May I ask how long have you left them like that?"

"Not long," Dom snapped back. He walked across the room and threw the sheets in the provided basket. "I would have done something earlier, it's just…."

"Just…?"

Dom turned and looked at his cousin, cheeks flushing. "Kel was here. She heard me scream…woke me up."

"You screamed?" Neal laughed. Biting his lip Dom nodded and Neal laughed all the harder. Dom swung at him but he dodged the hit. "Oh gods, and Kel was here! Did she know-of course not. She's _Kel_." After a moment more of laughter at his cousin's expense he looked back at Dom sternly. "Get some more rest. I'm going out to see Yuki." He walked from the room, grinning before he broke out into a trot.

Falling on the cot Dom rubbed his face in relief to finally be alone. He winced. He had yelled at Kel. He never yelled at her. Sure he had been frustrated, but never yelled. He bit his cheek. He always had a soft stop for Kel, and right now that part of his heart was crumbling. Turning on his side he closed his eyes only to see the face that overwhelmed him every day. He welcomed the picture and others in complete submission. It wasn't hard for him to come to the conclusion. He was sick.


	5. Chapter 5

Visitors

Human or Likewise

Kel was furious but hid her anger behind her Yamani mask. Dom was lucky she didn't draw steal on him when he started bombarding her with questions. If it were Neal or anyone else she wouldn't hesitate, but this was _Dom_. She inwardly glowered. Why did he last longer then the other infatuations she had? She was fickle, switching interests from one man to another, but she could never get Dom out of her head even when she tried. It had lasted years, her silly obsession. It never went away.

It was the way that he made her feel, she supposed. When she had a crush on Neal as a page he simply treated her as a friend, a comrade. Cleon had treated her as a warrior and a woman, but never seemed capable of both at the same time. Dom was just different some how, but she couldn't tell. He respected her as a warrior and a comrade, but sometimes it felt like he forgot she was a woman. He would flirt, of course; Dom flirted with everyone, but the things he said sometimes, about other ladies in the court, it was almost like he didn't think she wouldn't take offence in it for her gender. Like since she spent her time with men she would care less on what insulted her sex.

It didn't matter. She couldn't trust him anyways. Even if he did have the slightest interest in her he was nothing but a hopeless flirt.

Kel shoved Dom to the back of her mind, but his memory still lingered noticeably. Ignoring it Kel walked slowly and calmly to the raised gate and the traveling party that had just entered. She covered her surprise when she didn't only see Yuki and a few soldiers. With her was a group of her fellow worriers. Buri nimbly jumped from her mountain ponies back and landed on her feet without dropping her cross-bow. Faleron of Kings Reach, on of her friends from her training, handed his reins to a hostler and gave Kel a shy wave, walking over to her with his hands in his breeches pockets as Alanna the Lioness and Yukimi dismounted with a bit more difficulty thanks to their short stature.

"What are you all doing here?" Kel asked after receiving a hand shake, then spontaneously a hug from Faleron. She grinned at Merric's older cousin. "I thought you were on the boarder, and shouldn't Alanna and Buri be put on field or at least with the riders?"

"I'm still on leave from Mid Winter." He informed her. About to say something else a female voice interrupted him.

"Jon _insisted_ that I stay off the field for a while to heal up a bit." The Lioness came and joined them, propping her elbow on Faleron's forearm, too short to get any higher without falling over. Faleron stiffened and it was plain that the knight had taken enjoyment out of tormenting him on the road; either with her sword at her hip or her wit. She slapped his arm and lent off of him. Faleron chuckled softly and moved further from her to Kel's side.

Kel looked at the older Lady Knight. She looked tired, very tired, but still Alanna. There was something else lacing her face. Concern? Was there something wrong? No, Kel thought. She would've known.

"You came to the right place." Kel informed her idol. "There hasn't been any action here really. Not since I left."

"It's not just New Hope." Buri and Yuki had joined them. Buri clasped hands with Kel. "The other forts are getting a slower run of Scanrans, though," her face soured, "the immortals that had been staying up in the northern realms are coming down. More and more people are moving away from their capital, there for the immortals are moving away from the people, heading down here."

Kel frowned. "Did you see any?"

"Several," Yuki supplied. "There was an entire band of centaurs not far from here. There's probably some more lingering in the wood."

Kel nodded hope flaring behind a calm face. Finally something! "We'll send a couple squads out. Raoul was going to go over the area when he got back, but we wouldn't want to wait." Kel stopped when their eyes shifted to something behind her and she looked. Nothing was there. Something pulled on her breeches and she looked down. A little refugee boy was looking at the group, standing half behind Kel and holding onto her leg. She recognized his face.

"Hello," she moved so he was no longer hidden behind her legs. Kel knelt down and picked him up as he watched the other adults. She looked up to see Yuki hiding a smile with her fan and the rest laughing with their eyes. "I think introductions are in order." She named the boy and he looked up at her shocked, obviously he hadn't thought she would remember him. Kel pointed out each person for him. "Sir Faleron of Kings Reach, Merric's cousin. You remember Merric? He works with me sometimes?" He boy nodded his head and Faleron smiled to him. Kel moved on. "Buriram Tourakom. Commander of the Queens Riders, and marrying Sir Raoul this spring."

Buri winked at her. "Another wedding for you to star in," she said. Kel scowled. There was more seriousness in her voice then teasing. She snorted at the K'mir.

She indicated Alanna. "The Lioness and Kings champion, Alanna of Pirate's swoop and Olau. And Lady Yukimi noh Daimoru, Yamani worrier woman and The Meathead's fiancée. They're here for their wedding." She looked down at him. He was staring openly at the group. From where he was balanced on Kel's hip he gave a messy half bow before hiding his face in the front of Kel's shirt, childish bashfulness taking over.

"Hello," she heard him mumble into her chest to the others.

Kel refrained from chuckling and pulled the child from her, setting him back on his feet. "Your mother must be wondering where you are, it's almost supper. If you move quickly you might be able to tell the others who all arrived." The red faced boy nodded and trotted off to brag to the other children about the worriers he met. Turning around Kel glared at the adult's grins. "What?" she demanded.

"Do they follow you around?" Faleron asked. Kel looked at him quizzically.

"I think He's referring to how you have a knack to attract all things cute and adorable." Yuki explained, snapping her fan shut and letting Neal see her smile as he trotted over to them.

"I bet you won't last the week before obtaining something fuzzy or feathered." Faleron challenged smugly. Kel glared at Neal as he swept Yuki up and kissed her, a too public display for the Yamani making her blush, before turning her look to Fal. He shrugged.

The rest of the day she spent discussing wedding plans and assembling a riding party of two own squads to search the surrounding area for immortals. Yuki was having both Alanna and Buri as braids maids and Fal, and Merric would be grooms men. Kel was disappointed, though unwillingly flattered, that she was the maid of honor still. Worse Dom was still best man and the two of them would be spending a good amount of time at the ceremony together. They sat next to one another at the meal, had to dance the first dance, and still do their fan dance. She cringed at all the opportunities for him to ask her about her dreams, try to get her to explain them. Why she had them.

The problem was she didn't know. Every night she just dreamt of a mixture of the things she had witnessed over the years, nothing had meaning. Not really. Just memory.

Later in the evening the next day Kel, Alanna, Buri, Neal, Merric, Fal, and Dom's and Aiden's squads would be out for an immortal hunt, splitting into groups with at least two knights and ten men plus one. They talked over splitting the groups as they ate at dinner. Kel and Alanna would go with Dom's group with Neal seeing as Aiden's squad already had enough mages, though they didn't have the Lioness. It worked out with Buri working with the archers in Aiden's squad as he was short on them. Merric was a fair shot as well and Fal was handy with a sword, so the groups seemed even enough.

Kel didn't go to bed that night till late. Instead of going to bed after talking with the new arrivals she walked the battlements, checking the arrow-slits and making sure each quiver mounted on the stone wall was full. It was tedious and she knew that she was just avoiding going to her room and sleeping, but it was best to put it off for as long as possible. Reluctantly she turned and descended the stairs when her head began to spin two bells after midnight. Sleep was inevitable and she couldn't try to avoid it.

The next morning Alanna was watching Kel carefully. The table was chatty with Neal and Yuki going over more plans and the others groaning at the ideas, but it was the best man and maid of honor who were silent. Dom stared at his breakfast, pushing the eggs around the plates rim. Kel was slumped, eyes darkened with tired bruises till it looked like she was wearing face paint. Alanna was interested. Her fingers didn't itch with healing magic but the two both looked…_sick_. "Are you alright, Kel?" Alanna asked and Kel looked up.

"Oh," she gave a convincing smile that she was sure the older woman didn't buy. "I just stayed up late last night with a few things is all. I'll be better once I get to moving around and finish checking the grounds."

Of course Alanna didn't believe her, being a page once herself she had learned to lie and see through them. Looking over to the quiet sergeant she saw him eyeing Kel with resentment and grief. Spotting her eye on him, Dom turned back to his eggs quickly.

Kel had finished going over the camp quicker then she expected due to the sunny sky. After saddling up Peachblossom the two groups galloped out of the gate, splitting with Dom's squad headed north while Aiden's led south. Spreading out in a fan with a horse's width between them they galloped around the area, looking for traces that something had passed through. Eventually the groups where split in half to cover more ground but still with a back up. It wasn't more then half an hour later when a soldier frantically came galloping back to their group.

"We need the whole party for this one." He said panting as he pulled the horse up in front of Kel. She patted Peachblossom and warned him to not bite the other horse. She commanded the man to report. "No more then three miles out we made it when our look out came rushing back saying a group of Tauros' were ahead, and sure enough when we sent a small party there were six all over seven feet."

"A group?" the Lioness asked clearly disbelieving. "Tauros' don't travel together, and why so many?"

"They're getting smarter." Kel said absently, more to herself. "The more they're in civilization they realize they'll be hunted and killed just for their nature. If they travel in a group that size they can't be taken down by a group of villagers." And their victims have no chance of running, she added to herself. She nodded to the man. "Alright, let's move out at a trot. We don't want to leave them alone for too long, or for the Tauros' to get too much further."

They followed the man to the other group quickly. Out of all of the immortals she had faced over the years she never cared for this particular one. She would have tea with a Spidren before purposely meeting a Tauros'. When they met up with the other half of the squad Dom turned a scowl at the messenger. "I told you just the men and to send the women back." He hissed.

The soldier glared back at him. "Why bother? She wouldn't listen if I did, and why send our commander and Champion back? They'll be a-"

"Inconvenience once the creatures catch their scent. Send them back with a few guards."

"And cut your own numbers in half, Sergeant Domitan?" The Lioness asked. "Currently we outnumber them by more then half, which is good. Now, if you send the women back you loose a section of you numbers, then plus the men you send with us. It would be as if we were in split groups again, and the chances would be that the immortals find our retreating scent and follow to the fort. It's best for us to stay in an assembly."

Dom bowed to the Lady Knight. "No disrespect Sir Alanna, but I-"

"Was just concerned for your friend," She cut him off tartly. Alanna nodded to Kel who sat atop Peachblossom, looking forward calmly. She hated when people spoke about her with her still in the room. Alanna's look was hard. "Don't be. Lady Keladry has been fighting immortals as long as you if not longer. She started killing Spidren's at age eleven. She killed mage machines as a squire. You have nothing to worry about." Kel fought the blush that spread over her cheeks and glared at the woman next to her.

"But these-"

She cut him off again and Dom began coloring. "We know of their nature Sergeant. All women do." She tapped her sword hilt. "That's why we have these." She turned to Kel, her look business. "Lead on?" she asked. Kel nodded and they both looked to Dom who stiffened. With a grunt he called his men out and they began to lead the way to where they had found the immortals and followed their trail after that.

Kel listened hard once they were on the trail. When they came to the immortals, she wasn't surprised to see them, though what she saw was shocking. Of course she had known what they looked like, ever since they returned from the Divine Realms every mother had all but tattooed that picture on their daughters arm. But seeing pictures in books, and seeing six clustered together twenty feet away was completely different. Each hovered over seven feet and were completely naked, showing off russet brown skin and the evidence that there were only males in their species. When one turned its horned, bull-like head and saw the worriers he pulled back his lips in a snarl, showing off large teeth. The rest of them turned and Kel saw predator's eyes as they rested on her and Alanna. A tendon jumped in the thick neck of one of the Tauros' neck as he looked at Kel. She drew her sword once she saw his body's intentions. Taking a step closer on his splayed hoof he breathed in deeply through his flat nose, his bull's tail whipping behind him faster.

"Fan out," Kel demanded, finding her voice. The men spread from her sides giving each other space to move. As if just noticing the men the Tauros froze for a moment, before taking another advancing step towards Kel. Her palm growing with sweat Kel rose she sword as a warning, but the Tauros charged. She swung as he got close, but he jumped back from the blade as she swung and came back to his charge. Countering her swing she brought her blade up, then back down clipping his collarbone as her blade sunk into his shoulder.

The Tauros screamed and pulled back, yanking her sword with him. Stumbling back the immortal pulled it from his russet skin, tossing it to the ground behind him. He turned back to Kel, rage flickering in his hunter's eyes like an oil slick. He charged again, less confidence behind his attack, but more force. Kel reached behind her and pulled her glaive from the sling that held it to her back. Steering Peachblossom with her knees she sliced at the immortal, putting her weight behind the force. Her aim was good, and the blade sunk into him deep, before she tore it through his stomach letting blood and organs fall along with him. With the remainder of air in his lungs the Tauros screamed, a deep harsh rasp that made her shudder. She would dream of that as well, surely. Even for their instincts, Kel pitied having to kill the immortals because of the gods. Because they couldn't change who they were, just as she or anyone else couldn't.

Something pulled on her leg forcefully, dragging her askew on her saddle before she grabbed the horn and pulled herself up as the force yanked again. She looked down and another Tauros had come up on her, trying to pull her from the saddle. Derom, a corporal in Dom's squad, was fending off another who was going for the Lioness. Kel struggled to stay in the saddle as she got her glaive into a position in which she could swing, but Peachblossom reared as another Tauros came at her, throwing Kel from the saddle and to the snow harshly. She heard a rip and as she hit the ground ice cut into her leg in sharp, but small bites. Her breeches had ripped from where the Tauros had been holding her, mid thigh till the cloth hung from her calf. It was practically ripped all the way around but for a few strings of fabric holding it together.

The Tauros who had ripped her pants descended on her, mouth pulled up at the corners in satisfaction giving her view of his plated teeth. Kel gripped her glaive and just as the Tauros reached out to her clothes sliced through his throat. He sputtered, choking on his blood, before his entire weight fell on Kel, his wide naked human chest pressing her deeper in the snow as his blood spilled on her. She struggled, trying to get out from under the dead corps, but it was too heavy and she was shaken by his proximity. As she struggled she had forgotten of the other Tauros. It gripped her shoulder harshly, ripping her out from under the dead body and throwing her back a few feet to skid on the snow. It pulled up the back of her tunic and her back felt like it was on fire.

Kel tried to scramble up, to retrieve her glaive from under the dead Tauros' back, but the living one was moving towards her, his tail whipping faster behind him as he approached; each step more purposeful then the last. He was on her in a second's notice, large body hovering over hers and radiating a sickish heat. Kel's head was dizzy with panic and fear as the immortal began pulling at her clothes, not bothering with ties just grabbing and pulling. She yelled and pushed against his human chest as he pulled away the shred of remaining cloth the other had started, letting the main part of her left leg freeze in the snow. He continued to grope at her clothes till, suddenly, he stopped. A copper, salty smell filled Kel's lungs and she noticed fresh blood as it sunk into her clothes like the other Tauros. The Tauros bellowed and shot up, turning on the two forms behind him.

Kel took that moment to quickly scramble up, and make a dash for her glaive. Pulling it from under the dead Tauros she turned back to the other, not wanting to keep her back to an attacker. Dom and Gildes of Veldine crouched before the now dead Tauros that had just been on her. Both their swords dripped with blood. Biting her lip Kel quickly looked around at the others. There were no more immortals, but half the men were missing and Alanna was gone. She slowly walked over to Dom.

"Sergeant, where are half of our men?" she asked with low formality.

Dom looked at her, his face distant and cool. "There were others, Sir Keladry. Four more ahead of them. When they heard us attack they came back to assist. Lady Alanna and a few of the other men moved ahead to look for any more once we had a handle on these. Alanna made contact with one of one of Aiden's mages. They'll come back with the other squad."

She simply looked at him. How could she miss four more immortals? She had been so shocked from the three that went after her she didn't see any others, or hear any yells. Dom stood strait, leaving his sword to stand in the snow on its own, but still at the ready. "You should've stayed back Kel."

She scowled at him then, breaking from her reverie. "I was doing fine Dom. I killed two of them myself."

"You let one get close, and fell from your horse. Knights don't fall Kel. If you were paying more attention to all of your suroundings, you wouldn't have."

"Peachblossom reared when I was off kilter from one pulling me to the side." She said it coolly, evenly. "I couldn't do anything about it."

"You let him get too close and you dropped your weapon." His voice was stone. "Then you got thrown by that creature before he-"

"Enough, Dom." Kel interrupted him, feeling stupid. He was right, she was completely sidetracked the whole fight. Someone could have been hurt because she wasn't on defense, or she could have been hurt. She looked down at herself. She was covered in blood, her left leg showing completely from where the Tauros had ripped away her pants. She felt bruises forming over her back and shoulders from landing on the snow and falling from Peachblossom's back. There was no savior damage, but there could have been. She looked back up at Dom who was still standing before her, cold. "Thank you for the rescue." She told him sincerely and bowed, wincing when she came back up.

Without waiting for an answer she turned and walked over to Peachblossom, calming him with pats and whispers. Slowly he calmed and the other riding group came back, Buri not looking much better then Kel herself and Alanna was scowling. Quietly the group rode back to the fort.

Kel trudged to her rooms after bathing and once their got to the work on reports. She just decided to use her old one as notes and write a new one that would include the visitor's arrival and the immortal hunt and the Tauros' odd traveling behavior. She was though four pages and the sun was setting outside her shutters. Just as she moved to wet her quill there was a knock on the door. "Come in," she called, blowing on her paper to dry.

She turned when she heard the door click shut and was about to tell whoever it was to open it when she noticed blue eyes. "Dom," she greeted as he walked through her office, looking around. She scowled. It wasn't as if it was his first time being in her quarters. "Dom is there something you need? I'm in the middle of my report and I'd like to send it out soon. Wyldon will want to know about today."

Still looking around absently Dom looked at her weapons, cleaning rags, shuffled through a few letters, as he made his way to the door leading to her sleeping quarters. Opening the door he walked in, closing it partly behind himself. Kel stood strait up, temper flaring. "Dom," she followed him, intent on getting him out of her way as she worked. She was borderline numb at the moment, so close to the complete lack of sensation she desired. She wouldn't let him break that feeling for her.

He had the nerve to lie on her bed as he looked at her Yamani porcelain lucky cats that sat on her windows edge. He turned to look at her, an impish smirk on his face. "So, you like cats?"

"What's this about Dom?" Kel ignored his question. "I'm busy a-"

"I just wanted to give you something." He patted the space at his side, big enough to fit another body to lie down but still would have to be pressed to his side. "Sit down," he invited.

Kel sat, facing him. "What did you want to give me?" she asked, exasperated. She looked at his face, and was relieved some to see that he wasn't cold as he had been earlier. He was grinning mischievously at her, a sign he was up to something. She gave him a suspicious look.

Dom crossed his arms behind his head, and Kel looked him over. He was in a simple shirt and trousers, the lacings on his shirt undone showing off his collarbone and the top of his chest. His dark brown hair that was cut just below his ears and still damp from washing an hour or so ago but mostly dry and settling in messy waves. He wasn't wearing his boots; he had kicked them off at the door. Dom was grinning at her, his teeth glittering and making her stomach flip. "Reach under my shirt Kel."

She was caught completely by surprise. "What?" she yelled before muffling herself to a whisper. "_What?_"

"Reach under my shirt." He insisted, taking her hand in his and drawing it to the hem of his cream shirt. Her fingers brushed over the skin exposed above the start of his trousers and the end of his shirt. It made her tingle to feel him, not knowing he had the same reaction to her own touch. Kel didn't move, just kept her hand on his lower stomach. Heat filled her, raced up her arm and settled in her chest. She looked up and met sapphire eyes, holding Dom's gaze. Her heart ached at her attraction for him. Six years was a long time to hold a fleeting affection, but she realized that it wasn't fleeting. She wasn't fickle with Dom. Ever since she had met him that first day she had liked him, though she had pushed it back with other thoughts. It was still there.

Dom watched her as her fingers pushed up the hem of his shirt, slowly but getting there. When she stopped he nudged her with his leg. "Keep going," he urged. "It's just my shirt Kel. It's not like-"

"It's not that," she pulled back her hand and pointed at the lump. "It's _moving_."

Dom looked down and sure enough the lump was quivering. He smiled at it then looked up at Kel, eyes twinkling. "No surprise. It likes your voice already."

Kel frowned and without hesitation lifted his shirt to his collarbone. Curled up in a ball on Dom's smooth stomach was a purring cat, almost completely silent as it looked at her with pale jade eyes. Its fur was such a rich brown it was almost red in color, and had black paws. Out of all the things she had thought he had hidden, this was the last. Reaching out she ran a finger between the kitten's ears. It stood, arched its back, and let her run her finger down its spine. It was so small; she could fit the kitten in her hand. Probably wasn't even a year old.

"He's yours." Dom explained, watching her and the kitten.

Kel picked up the kitten and looked him over. He was a healthy weight, clean, strong, and definitely male. She cuddled him to her chest and he captured her thumb with his paws, licking it with his rough tongue. Kel looked up at Dom who was grinning at the kitten. Setting the kitten on Dom's other side she threw her arms around him, hugging him. "Thank you Dom. He's adorable. Where did you get him?"

When Kel pulled back Dom was a little light headed. He scooted over on the bed a little and Kel laid down next to him. The kitten climbed right over Dom, scratching the man's bare chest with his claws as he did, and settled on Kel's stomach. Dom glared at the cat as he pulled his shirt down and Kel laughed, tugging the kitten's ear. "One of the villagers gave him to me…we'll, I asked first. They said that this was their third litter from the mama and they still got twelve out of her."

Silence drew on after that. Kel thought, while Dom watched her. Sighing, she looked at the ceiling. "I'm sorry for yesterday." She said it quietly while the kitten nuzzled its head against her palm. "You were right. It's not fair for me to expect you to tell me something that I won't even tell you." She turned her head and looked at him. He turned his too and their noses pressed together, making him smile.

"I'm sorry, too." He admitted. "I shouldn't have yelled at you and I hated myself after I did it, even today when I got mad for your being attacked. I didn't mean to insult your skills, Kel, I was just worried."

Kel was hesitant. "Do you still want to hear about my dreams?" Dom nodded eagerly and scooted closer as a comfort. She didn't know how to explain, so she just did it the best she could. "Well…Dom, you're in the Own. You know it just gets worse and worse everywhere you go to help. Everything I've seen that produces violence or is the consequence of it I dream of. I thought it would be over a while after Stenmun and Blayce were dead, but it isn't. That was over a year ago and I still have nightmares, though, they're not the same as the ones the Chamber was giving me. They're not warnings or messages. It things from the Own, the killing devices attacking Haven, Scanra…." She took a breath. "Then there's pain, like I'm being attacked all over again but I can't stop it. Frozen swords run me through when I wake up in the mornings and at night." Unconsciously she moved her hand over her breast, feeling the pain in her memory. "It's so unnaturally cold. I feel frozen, but not numbed so I won't feel it. That's still there." She looked at him. He was still. Thinking.

"You're tough, Keladry."

She smiled at him, relieved he didn't think she was out of her mind. "I know, people always tell me. That and if I would stop picking up my sword I wouldn't be as toned and probably sm-" She stopped dead sentence when he put two fingers over her lips. She quivered from the touch.

"I didn't mean it as masculine." His eyes danced with amusement looking at her. "You're toned yes, but there is no denying you're a female Kel. You can't fool anyone. Especially not me, I know all too well. What I meant was you're psychologically tough, being able to handle all this stuff on your own for so long, handling the accusations of your shield and worth. You're probably the most mentally resilient person I know, though I'm sure you could beat me with a sword as well." He made his face radically sullen.

She beamed at him. "Yes, I'm sure I can, but at least you're allowed use a hammer. No one at any of the forts I've visited will let me help with building. When I ask they just say some Own's sergeant said I would drive a nail through my hand." She looked at him pointedly, accusingly.

Dom laughed. "We should honor such a hero." He chuckled louder when Kel stuck her tongue out at him.

In a fluid motion Kel grabbed the back of his head and kissed his forehead. She pulled back and grinned at his blush. "A reward for my hero," she explained. The cat on her stomach _murted _as if to say yes and they both laughed.

"What are you going to call him?" he asked after a moment.

"I'm going to name him after his papa." She decided, a smile pulling at the corners of her mouth.

"And who's that?" He asked, propping himself up on his elbow and watching her as the kitten hooked and unhooked his claws in her tunic front. Kel didn't move to stop him; the cat was going to be spoiled he could tell. She looked at Dom pointedly. "Me?" he asked and she nodded. "Won't that be a little odd, me and your cat having the same name? I might get confused and think you're calling me when you're just talking to him."

"I never call you Domitan." She reasoned. "I'll call him Domitan and you Dom."

"You call me Domitan in situations around conservatives and when you're mad." He pointed out, but Kel shook her head.

"No, then it is Sergeant Domitan or Domitan of Masbolle. Look, you have two choices here." She grinned. "I can call him Dom and you Kitten, or I can call him Domitan and you Dom."

"Stick to the latter, please." He insisted, grinning. "Though, I do like how you pronounce the word kitten. It sounds like you're blowing a whistle when you say the 'I'. Almost like a three year old." He chuckled at her scowl before his face became very serious. He embraced her warmly, causing Domitan to _murt_ a protest. "I'm glad you told me why you can't sleep," he murmured, pulling back. "I understand where you're coming from. All of the Own has had night terrors, but you have more responsibility then us, you've seen more. It's only natural for yours to be worse. I just wish they weren't so painful, and that I could do something to stop them."

Kel embraced him back, glade she had him. Glad he understood. The squeeze was a bit too tight and she winced as he crushed her tender shoulders. He recoiled instantly. Without stopping to think Dom sat up and lifted Domitan from Kel's stomach, settling him on the pillow he had just been resting on. He motioned for Kel to sit up. She did, and he lifted the back of her shirt without asking. Her back was pink and raw, littered with tinny but deep cuts that were the make up of her snow burn. Lifting her shirt higher he saw a large bruise shaped like fingers curl over her shoulder. "Are there more?" he asked, referring to her bruise. She nodded. "Where?"

He heard her hesitate. "Err…when it-it had me pinned down and wa-was…." Dom grinned at her stammering and turned so his face was in front of hers, looking at her. She was blushing, he was amazed by the color, and the fact he cracked her without trying. She glared at him, regaining herself. "They're no where I am comfortable with you looking."

"Fine," he sighed and looked at her with pitiful and yearning eyes, drawing a laugh from her. He laughed along with the sound. "Do you have anything for this?" He asked.

"Yeah, second drawer on the nightstand." She instructed him to her container of bruise balm and warned him of its smell. When she heard muffled chokes Kel chuckled.

Dom's smooth fingers where cool as he spread the balm over her bruise. She closed her eyes and let herself drift, thinking of nothing but the heavy smell filling the room and Dom's touch.


	6. Chapter 6

Cur and Kitten

Kel's eyes opened to a very beautiful, very close, sergeant's face. Dom looked completely content with himself as he slept. She had been completely content herself. It had been one of those rare nights were she dreamt of nothing. Her imagination had come up with nothing but the sweet blankness that she desired beyond all the rest. The corner of her mouth quirked up but she refrained herself from grinning idiotically. Waking up to Dom's face wasn't a let down, either. Today was going to be easy.

It was an hour past dawn, she had slept in, and she knew she had to get up. Pushing off the coverlet that covered her she tried to turn only to find that Dom's arms held her down. Feeling her move he tugged her closer to him, crushing her to his warm chest so forcefully she was breathless. She stared at his chest, confused by it's naked state. When last night did he take off his shirt, and better yet when did they fall asleep? The last thing she remembered was him rubbing the balm into her shoulders. She could still smell it in the room; he must have left the cap open.

Kel moved again and noticed that she didn't feel cloth over skin, but skin on skin. She almost screamed when she saw nothing but her breast band covering her. Moving her legs to get away from him, to wake him up so he'd let her go, she felt Dom's trousers chafe her calves and thighs. Her legs were bare as well.

Dom had been sleeping quietly and he had thought Kel wouldn't mind too much that he fell asleep there. Something hard hit his shoulder and he groaned squeezing his eyes closed tighter. It hit him again and he rolled over, trying to avoid the un-pleasantry. There was an indignant gasp and something hit the side of his head. Provoked, Dom opened his eyes to a sight. His aggravation quickly fled when he saw a red faced, nearly naked Kel laying on his chest. She scowled at him and he grinned back. "Good morning My Lady."

"Let go Sergeant." She growled, her voice and face deadly. "Where did my clothes go?"

"I folded them and placed them on your bedside table, Protector. You had some nasty bruises on your legs, but that bruise balm you have works miracles. Do you know where I could get some?" He asked casually, not loosening his grin when Kel began to wiggle.

If you let her keep doing that you're going to have a situation worse then her sword's tip at your nose. At the thought Dom let her go and she slid herself off of him. He would like to avoid the awkward moment he had experienced back in the infirmary. At least Kel hadn't noticed it then. If it happened now there was no way he could hide it. She would obviously be suspicious of him wanting to hide under her blankets.

Kel pulled the coverlet off the bed as she stood, wrapping it around herself quickly before she glared at Dom. "Explain." She demanded. When he didn't even sit up she snapped, "I told you I didn't want you seeing me like that. Like this."

Dom turned his head and looked up at her, his dark hair falling into his face. "I thought you were normally happy in the morning. When Neal wrote about you he said you were the one to pull their heads out of their bowls so they wouldn't drown in their morning porridge." He looked at her accusingly, his eyes first taking in her facial expression before traveling down to read her body language. She shuffled, self-conscious as he assessed her. He grinned. "Did you at one point get to Neal too late? I always thought it a bit odd that a man his age could still act as a child, maybe it was the lack of oxygen to his brain that did him some damage."

"Dom," Kel sighed turning her back to him. "Get your shirt back on."

"Do I make you uncomfortable?" he asked.

Kel snorted, tugging the coverlet around her tighter before she disappeared into her dressing room. Domitan _meowed_ and sat on Kel's pillow. "Uncomfortable is an understatement, Dom. Waking up this morning practically naked with you balancing me on top of you was beyond unnerving." Liar, her mind accused as she tugged on a shirt.

"Unnerving," Dom muttered softly to himself as he picked up his own shirt from the cold floor. He tugged it on, and ran his fingers through his hair to attempt to make it stay down. "I didn't hear the word unpleasant or repulsive." He smiled then frowned as he tried to untangle a knot in his hair.

Kel came out and glared at him before she saw his hair. Going into the privy room she retrieved a comb and a bowl of water. Like she had done while she was a page Kel grabbed a chair and dragged it over to Dom, standing on top of it so she would be taller then him. Knocking his hands away form his snarled hair she past him the bowl and told him to hold it out for her. He did and she wetted the comb before gently running it through the knots, pulling them apart slowly.

Dom closed his eyes as she smoothed out his hair and ran her fingers through it to be sure all the snarls were gone. It seemed like such an intimate moment that he didn't want to speak. All he wanted to do was stitch the feeling of her stroking hands into his mind to remember forever, but he knew the moment wasn't intimate. He would have to say something to break his train of thought before it did him damage. "I remember reading of this too." He mumbled as she worked on his part, using more water to do so. "You really are a Mother…the goddess herself." He yelped when she hit him with the comb on the shoulder. A tender part between the webbing of muscle.

"Don't make such a comparison." Kel scorned him as she got back to work. Honestly she could have finished his hair a while back, but she just enjoyed the soft touch. "I'm sure she wouldn't appreciate it."

"Then what am I to compare you to if I can't compare you to the goddess herself?" Dom huffed, rubbing his shoulder with his free hand. "There's no comparing you to anything _earthly_."

She hit his shoulder again, but not as hard. She had to admit she liked the compliment. Kel pulled back the comb and took the bowl from him after she climbed down from the chair. He stood before her, patting his hair to see if it would fall out of place. She knocked his hands away again. "Well," he grinned. "Am I decent?"

"You're never decent Dom." Kel laughed as she moved to put the comb and bowl away. Quickly she cleaned her teeth and straightened her own hair. She would have to wait for a bath. "You look fine though. Your shirt's not even dirty for carrying a cat around in it." She reached down and picked up Domitan who happily purred to see her. She let him snuggle to her chest before placing him on her shoulder. It took a while but he found his balance and hooked his claws into her shirt to keep himself in place.

"You're bringing him with?" Dom asked.

"He has to eat too." She pointed out. Ignoring him as he laughed Kel walked from her room, waiting for him so she could lock up.

Dom watched her as she bent to press the key into the door knob, turning it so the tumblers fell into place. He looked down the hall quickly when she stood strait. "I was wondering about something Milord said before he left." Kel said as they walked to the mess. "How is it that you are of highest rank? There are other sergeants, why are you above them?"

"Because I'm simply privileged." He sighed when she looked at him in disbelief. "You couldn't even pretend to agree with me, could you? It's because of my higher rank as a soldier and a noble."

"But there are other nobles in the Own." Kel pointed out. "Aiden has Emmet of-"

"Fenrigh is simply a soldier." Dom interrupted. "And there is no other noble house in the own that's a higher rank then Masbolle. There for that leaves me."

"That seems like a deficient system." Kel frowned.

"Not really. If Raoul didn't trust me he wouldn't have given me the job, and if I didn't think I could do it I wouldn't have excepted. I've seen what happens when a person is given a job they cant control." Kel shivered. She knew as well, remembering when she was a squire and saw Dom's corporal killed. The worst part was that Dom , Raoul, even the man himself knew he couldn't handle the job.

"I hope you can control it." She murmured as they walked into the mess. She headed over to the food and filled her plate. He followed suit.

"You don't trust me, Lady Knight?" he asked teasingly.

Kel smiled at him warmly, maybe his cold front wouldn't return for a while. "I've always trusted you Sergeant." She said before turning to head to her table. She missed Dom's face as it broke out in a delighted grin.

When Kel sat down someone cleared their throat. Looking around she saw Lalasa sitting quietly at the opposite end of the table, smiling at her old mistress. "I've missed My Ladies presents the past day and a half working on her dress. And apparently your cat." She said, eyes twinkling. "Yukimi decided to add another layer to it. Gold, cream embroidery."

"Lalasa it's great to see you." Kel smiled as well before her face went flat. "Another layer? There were already two when I last was fitted."

"You will try on the modified kimono after you finish eating. All the other ladies are in Yukimi's room at the moment and are awaiting our arrival. Yuki said she would like to see if they could try something out on your hair and what face paint you should wear so hurry up. You don't want them coming down here to get you with their fans." Lalasa informed her and stood. "I'll see you there, Lady Keladry."

"It's Kel, Lalasa." She reminded her friend as she walked past to the door. Lalasa smiled and nodded before stepping out. Kel sighed and looked down at her food. So much for an easy day, she thought and stood. Tossing her untouched food she walked out of the mess to follow her old maid. Domitan curled around her neck and purred into her ear softly.

Osbern clapped Dom on the shoulder as he took as seat with a few of the Own. "Where were you last night, Dom? The sergeant's quarters were quiet without you." The other sergeant asked him teasingly. "We missed your moans."

He must have not of been as silent as he thought.

Dom yanked his shoulder from the other mans hold and set down him food, sliding onto the bench next to Wolset. The soldier looked at his sergeant and frowned. "What does he mean? Are you all right?" Aiden and Balim burst into laughter hearing him.

"He sounded just fine to us." Aiden said through chuckles. "Enjoying his torture even."

"Oh…." Wolset's face was blank in his understanding before shattering with a grin. "Oh!" He turned to Dom and punched him hard on the shoulder. "Who was it, one of the court ladies from Mid Winter? It's not a refugee, is it?"

"Neither." Dom quickly took a bite from his roll in attempt to avoid speaking.

"It has to be one of the two." Balim pointed out to them. "Or it could have been a trollop from the streets in Corus."

"I would never!" Dom protested. His fork clattered against his plate loudly when he dropped it.

"You have." Wolset grinned. "Second day in the Own, remember? We went to that tavern."

Right, Dom took up his fork again and filled him mouth as the men laughed at his expense. How could he forget that night? He had gotten himself so drunk he couldn't see straight. When he had gone to drills the next morning Dom had to sit down and put his head between his knees. Not the best impression for your first week.

As Dom looked off and ate the conversation changed from him, which he could only be thankful for. A handsome, dark haired man who had arrived with Yuki and her party was sitting by Neal who had just sat down. Playfully the man Dom didn't know spoke with Neal and hit him with his piece of bread. Neal glared at him.

"May I ask who's pelting my Meathead Cousin with grains?" Dom asked, the corner of him mouth twisting up in an easy half grin. "Domitan of Masbolle." He extended his hand to the man who assessed him with dark eyes.

He took Dom's hand in a firm grip. "Faleron of Kings Reach." He introduced himself with a small smile. The name rang bells in Dom's mind. He had heard it, or read it at some point. "I was on the lethargic half of the hunt. It's a shame only your squad got the focal run of immortals and we got the scraps. Kel always gets the best out of a fight."

"Faleron." Now he remembered from Neal's letters. "You were a year ahead her and Sir Meathead weren't you? You were with them as pages when you got hit by bandits."

Fal's cheeks flushed lightly. "Like I said. Kel always gets the best out of a fight."

That's when Dom remembered Kel had taken over Faleron's command, leading the pages to safety. That must have been a topic made for sore teasing with other boys. Dom shrugged, seemingly casual. "Don't sweat it. No one knows better then myself that Kel can demote any male from his rank. I thought I was a fair swordsman till we dueled, and there is no way I would challenge our dear commander in a jousting match. Not with that bruiser she rides."

"Since you've mysteriously disappeared last night, Dom," Neal drawled, "it's time to bring you up to speed." His face was strait, but his eyes flashed with mischievous intentions. "We'll be celebrating tonight at the barracks. A bachelor's party. Will you be off dreaming of your lady love while you bed one of the poor refugee girls, something I severely imagine Kel would not commend, or do you plan on coming along with the fun?"

Dom thought on it for a moment. It could be something he might avoid, could spend the time doing something more important. But the problem was he had nothing of importance to do. This would be a good chance for his behavior to be looked over by the men. If he had another night like the last few he would have a better chance of nobody noticing if they were all drunk. Plus he needed the time to forget. "I'll be there." He told Neal surely.

Neal's grin contained nothing but pure evil. "Good. You can help us kidnap Kel then. Gods know she wouldn't come unless forced."

Dom froze. Shit. And he couldn't even turn down going now. Neal quickly finished eating and stood, motioning for the two to follow suit. "Come along pets. My beautiful wife has asked me to have you put on your ceremony costume so Lalasa may check it. Merric keeps hiding from me so it'll just be the two of you."

"Again?" Both men groaned in unison. The look Neal gave them made them shoot up from their seats with their trays. It was a look saying he would kill even his closest friends if they didn't follow his love's will. Grumbling both men followed as Neal decreed them to move to his quarters.

After changing into the dress tunic and leggings Dom walked with his cousin and Fal without noticing where they were going precisely. He was more concentrated on the cloth covering him. He had to admit they were comfier then his Own's dress uniform, but the colors…didn't suit his taste. The cut of the golden tunic was different as well, with a higher collar that unbuttoned down to the top of his chest. The pale gold was matched with a cream that was his breeches. The embroidery of his tunic was also the cream color, the patterns so intricate he couldn't follow them. The end product made it look as if the golden fabric was sprouting ghostly flames.

Dom looked over to his cousin and Fal who where chatting amiably, not noticing his silence. Faleron was dressed similar to Dom, but the colors switched. Golden flames sprouted form his cream chest. His golden leggings glittered and drew the attraction of whoever they past as well as Dom's tunic did. He was relieved that most people were already at their work stations for the day and less would see them. Dom didn't want the attention just then and especially not for looking so silly. But there was no possible way that the eyes would stay on him and Fal. No. The eyes would no doubt turn to Neal who was, rather then wearing the colors of Queenscove as custom, completely clad in scarlet and trimmed in gold. All of their dress was a tribute to Yama, the goddess of fire and chief goddess of the Yamani's. She was the creator of the islands and of the Yamani's, there for he would pardon her himself for bringing him his Yukimi.

It wasn't until the other two stopped did Dom realize where they were. It was like going in a large circle and he was back at Kel's rooms. There were voices coming from inside, and seeing as the other men were not moving to knock they would be spying.

"You get anywhere near me with that Yuki and I will hit you with my fan." Kel warned. Her voice made the men exchange worried glances. There was no hiding the anger in the tone.

"You're forgetting that she already took away all your fans at the moment." Buri's voice reminded Kel as there was a thrashing sound. "Sit back down. Alanna has your sword and _naginata_ already and there is nothing in the realm that would make me move to let you get your axe."

Neal knocked then and the room went silent. Within seconds the door was wrenched open and Alanna surveyed the men before stepping aside to let them come through. "You're late." She informed them briskly as she closed the door behind them. "Neal let Lalasa look at you first."

"I will not wear that!" Kel burst from the dressing room wearing two open kimonos. They flapped back from her exposed body, covered by her breast band and loincloth. Her face was painted a shade lighter, her cheeks pink and her eyes lines. She had her hair twisted up in a knot at the back of her head that was decorated with a large magnolia. When she saw the men staring at her she stopped, standing in front of them in as much shock as their stunned faces held. Buri let out a snort before bursting into laughter which Alanna followed. The men were still surprised, staring openly. Neal was the first to look down at the floor. Faleron soon followed suit and Dom quickly did the same. He clutched his fists and dug his nail into his palms to redirect his thoughts.

Yuki came out from the dressing room calmly and gripped Kel's shoulder. She still didn't moved. Mortified into a frozen state. Yuki tugged her and she stumbled, following the short Yamani back into the dressing room. "That," they all heard Yuki say sternly, "is why you must wear the obi, Kel. If you don't like it too bad. I'm sure you'd rather wear it then letting your robes fly open in the middle or the ceremony."

Under Buri and Alanna's chuckles there was another sound. Dom lifted his eyes again and looked towards Neal who, by all appearances, was choking. His face was red, eyes bulged, jaw set. Any moment Dom was sure his cousin would explode, and he did. Breaking down Neal let out his laughter and was quickly silenced as a cherry red fan came spinning out from the dressing room. Sucking in a startled breath Neal dodged the fan and it clattered against the stone wall.

Yuki pocked her head from the dressing room. "Anyone dead?" she asked unconcerned. She surveyed them with laughing eyes and drew her head back into the smaller room. "Kel, you're loosing your aim. We'll have to work on that while I'm here."

"I'd have had him if you would have let me out to at least aim." Kel fidgeted in the robes and Yuki rapped her with her own fan. Kel stopped moving and let her friend dress her in the new and final robe. When Yuki secured the kimono in place with the stiff sash called an obi. She called for Lalasa to look Kel over.

She held very still as her former maid tugged at the wide triangle shape sleeves, looked for loose strings, and checked the fit. It was almost like having to be at the healers as a young girl and Yuki was her mother, watching closely to hit her with a fan if there was any sign of her resistance. Lalasa took a step back, grinning. "You look very beautiful, My Lady. The fit is right and everything. There is nothing to improve."

"I hope that means I can take this off then?" Kel muttered through gritted teeth. The two women laughed and nodded, helping her from the kimono. When they began to help her dress in her breeches Kel stopped them. "I can dress myself." She informed her friends. They looked disappointed for a moment before Yuki got to work letting down her hair and Lalasa went to harass Neal.

When Kel stepped from the dressing room in her normal breeches she saw Neal being tugged and prodded at worse then she had been. She grinned at the sour face he was making towards Lalasa. Faleron was leaning against the wall talking with Alanna. When he saw Kel his face flushed and he smiled. Kel felt color creep into her own cheeks but ignored it, smiling back at him. Buri tapped her on the shoulder. Kel looked down at the shorter woman. "You behaved?" She asked. Kel nodded warily. It was impossible for her to be tired form only putting on clothes, but she was. Buri smiled. "Good. Sit down then and stay out of the way."

Kel didn't hesitate. She was going to take the offer when she still had the chance. She flopped down on her bed next to Dom and glared up at him when he smiled down at her. "I'd like to speak with you about something."

"What ever do you have on your mind, Lady Fair?"

"What's on my mind is the number of times you've seen me in my under clothes." She hissed quietly. Dom grinned wolfishly. She shoved him. "If it happens again-"

"I'll be a happy man." Dom interjected.

"You're incorrigible!" Kel snapped and he laughed. "If it happens again your insides will be out. Understand? If I wake up again and find my clothes are missing thanks to you I will not hesitate in killing you."

Dom poked out his lips. "Fine, but it's not my fault Kitten. It's just nature that women loose their clothes around me."

"Ew!" Kel cried, covering her ears. "Dom I don't want to hear that from you."

"But you know it's true." He grinned, watching her as she leaned back from him and Domitan toyed with her hair. The sparrows sat on the window edge watched as the sergeant scooted closer to their human. "You know I'm irresistible." Kel laughed at that and Jump looked at her from the floor by Lalasa's sowing kit, good ear pricked forward. Dom poked out his lips again in a ridiculous pout. "I've seen you looking at me Kel. I know you want it."

Kel smothered her smile and worked her face into a blank, serious mask. "And what would this 'it' be, Sergeant?" she asked.

Dom moved so his lips were right by her ear. "Me," he whispered softly. He didn't know what he was doing, what he was thinking. All he knew that the warm body next to him shivered under his touch. All he knew was that he liked it.

Kel forced control into her body, slowing her heart beat and pushing back the warm glow that burned her cheeks. She slid into a different mask. It wasn't her calm Yamani training, but a playful and joking face. She stared at Dom, letting her eyes snap wide in shock. "Neal!" she whined. "Your cousin's corrupting my innocence."

"Since when do you complain to the Meathead?" Dom asked, leaning away from her again.

"Since when have you begun to sexually harass my friends?" Neal asked and Lalasa hit him for moving. He winced. "Could you spare Kel from your immoral ways?"

"She liked it."

"I'm scarred for life." Kel informed him. Her mind back tracked for a moment. "Wait…did you call me _kitten_?" she asked in disbelief. "What's with your sudden obsession with cats? First you're painting my face with whiskers, then you get me a kitten, and now you're calling me one."

If you knew my real obsession, he silently told her, wishing he really could. "You put whiskers on me first." He reminded her. "And yes, I did call you Kitten. What are you going to do about it? Hit me?" A soft, but still strong force snapped his head to the side. He turned back to Kel and looked at her, looked at the pillow in her hands.

"Cur." She called him smugly.

Dom squinted at her. "Arf arf, yip yap, grrr." Both of them laughed.

The day continued on into the night. After an hour of walking the walls Kel went on another hunt with only Aiden's squad, taking down three Spidrens. The squad of men found entertainment in teasing Kel over her face paint. How could she have forgotten to wash it off? Merric came along, anything to avoid Neal during the daylight hours. Kel herself kept herself busy, but out of habit. She hadn't had a nightmare, but that didn't mean they wouldn't come back. She finished her report, neatened her room, and played with Domitan and Jump till dark smothered out the light. Dejectedly she pulled on a loose nightshirt and crawled into bed.

It was when the camp was deep in rest when Dom started feeling incredibly stupid. He crept slowly next to Wolset behind Neal who held up the lamp. On Wolset's other side was Fulcher with rope and a gage. They were all going to die, and Dom knew it.

Faleron stumbled when they were outside of her room and was shushed violently. Neal tried the knob, and of course found it locked. He looked at Dom. "Won't you do the honors, cousin?" he whispered.

"Me?" Now he couldn't even tell Kel he hadn't meant to go along with their plan. Neal knew he had lock picks in his belt and that he could use them. Silencing a sigh between gritted teeth he pulled out a few long and slender strips of metal and fitted them into the key hole. He worked as quietly as possible, but there were a few clicking noised coming from the tumblers. Suddenly they began to spin, snapping the bits of metal in the key hole.

Dom swore and looked up. Kel was standing above him with her closed _shukusen_ in hand. She was holding the ladies fan as a thrusting weapon, pretty and deadly as ever. Dom stared at her face. Her eyes were blood shot, her cheeks pale. The _shukusen_ fell from her fingers and clattered to the floor. Her hands were shaking, her whole body trembling slightly.

Dom shot to his feet and grabbed the doorknob. He kicked the base of the fan and it slid into Kel's room. Softly grabbing her shoulder he steered her back and closed the door behind him in the stunned men's faces. The room was dark, pitch black, but he could tell Kel was right in front of him. Her warmth seemed to radiate off of her and only to him, ignoring every other direction in the room. The darkness was tempting, and her irregular breaths on his face alluring. The thoughts stopped then. It was then he remembered what had her so tired, so weak. "I'm sorry." He whispered and felt around in the dark. His hand brushed against her shoulder and he slipped his arms around her, hugging her warmly.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was horse. "Why are Neal and the others outside the door?"

Dom grunted and disengaged the hug, still keeping his arms around her however. "Bachelors party. They wanted to kidnap you. I'm sorry. I didn't want to get mixed up in this, really I didn't. I just wanted everyone to get drunk so I could sleep in peace."

Kel was quiet. "You never did tell me what your nightmare was about." She murmured. Dom dropped his arms completely. Kel took that as a refusal. "I told you Dom. You have no reason not to trust me."

Dom looked at the door. The men could hear them if they were loud. A fight wouldn't do him any good then. "It's not that." He hissed, keeping his voice low. He scrambled for a second, but the lie wasn't hard to come up with because it wasn't a lie at all. She was one of his nightmares, but not his only. "You were in the Own with me for four years Kel. You know some of the things I've seen. I have friends and comrades who are killed before my eyes every year. I went to Scanra with you. I didn't see everything you did, but I saw enough."

His veins filled with lead when she hugged him. He didn't deserve her touch. He hadn't told her what she asked for, he just compromised. "Thank you," she whispered and his stomach sank. "It was stupid, but I just wanted the ground to be even."

I am a terrible, _terrible_ person. He let her pull back and rummage around in the dark for breeches. Pulling on a pair she opened the door and the men fell at her feet, attempting to look as if they hadn't been pressing their ears to the wood by shooting to their feet and grabbing her. She let them, but threatened to ring their necks it they so much as tied her hands together. Over her shoulder she asked Dom to lock up and tossed him the keys as Faleron picked her up and threw her over his shoulder.

"Brut!" She called him as he and the rest of the men started off down the hall. Dom quickly locked up and followed, envying the other man the feeling of the lady draped over him. When his hand moved on her thigh with little regard Dom stiffened.

The night was long for Dom. He drank, and thought, and watched Kel. She had adjusted to the men better then he had thought. She drank with them, but much like Roual only had juice. It seemed Mid Winter was a onetime thing. She laughed at their stories and jokes and excepted their challenges in arm wrestling. When Volorin complained that arm wrestling was too simple of a task was when they got rowdy. That's when the wrestling matches started.

The beds were pushed back against the walls and crammed together to give them a good space in the center of the room. Bets were made as people were partnered off and Dom was surprised when Kel bet for Wolset against Osbern. He could see her method though he wasn't sure he agrees with it. Wolset was only a soldier and Osbern a sergeant. Most likely to happen would be Osbern underestimates Wolset and looses because Wolset would over run himself to prove his worth. That was exactly what happened and Kel jeered when she received her coppers.

"It's your turn, Lady Keladry." Osbern said sorely. He surveyed the room slowly and rested his eyes on Dom drowning himself in his cup. Dom set it down, eyeing it suspiciously wondering why the brandy suddenly tasted different. "Dom." Osbern called and his head shot up.

"You're having me fight a drunk?" She asked in disbelief. "That's no fight."

"I'm not drunk." Dom got to his feet and staked over to them. "And I could beat you, Lady Knight. Kitten's mistaken herself for a lion." He reached out to grip her wrist, but found himself flying to smack the ground. He gasped as the air was pressed from his lungs. Struggling to get up a boot pressed on him and held him down.

"One, two, three. Down." Kel lifted her foot from him and crouched by his side. She slapped the floor loudly with her hand. "I win. Anything broken?"

"My pride." He winced as she helped him up.

Kel laughed at his pained face. "I'm sorry. That may leave a bruise." She brushed him off and Dom grunted, the liquor making it harder to control his bodies actions. He fought it and won out as she stepped back. Kel nodded to him and the other men. "If you'll excuse me but I'd like to take a walk. It's too hot in here. I'll be back." The men waved her off and nodded. Kel smiled and turned from them, giving Dom's shoulder an apologetic squeeze.

Dom watched as Kel stepped from the Owns barracks. He wanted _something_ with her. Something to satisfy his need for her at the moment, so he came to a quick decision, and hated himself for it. It was wrong, but in a way it could help them both. Maybe he hadn't deluded himself and it really was him that kept her nightmares at bay. Maybe his presence would help her, hers would certainly help him. He was taking advantage, but Mithros wouldn't let him stop. Quietly he followed her out, ignoring the drunk men calling for him. He felt like a predator stalking his pray, and it felt good. For once he was following through on his desires. For once he would pursue his Lady Knight.


	7. Chapter 7

An Offer

Kel made her steps soft and direct though she had no clue where her destination was. It didn't matter. The snow at her feet was staining her breeches bottoms wet and the wind whipping color into her cheeks. The cold air brought her roaming mind back to herself before numbing it to a degree that all she could think of was the correct way to walk. Right left right left, easy. She silently padded along a dark turn and smiled to herself. It wasn't like the years she had spent at the palace and in Roual's service. Kel never had to be cautious where she went alone. The refugee's wouldn't harm her, they loved her.

"I'll miss that love."

"What love, Lady Knight?" There were foot steps coming up from behind her and Kel twirled on the balls of her feet. Dom walked towards her grinning as always, but there was something different. He was standing straighter, surer of himself somehow, but his hands were curled into fists. He walked straight past her, turning down an ally between two brick buildings. "I can't imagine someone ever stop loving…." His words drifted of as he walked further away.

Kel looked into the ally he had disappeared into only to see Dom standing just a few feet from the entry way. His words hadn't quieted as he walked off, just as he spoke. He stood there grinning widely at her, waiting for her to follow. Something about the look in his eyes made her stomach knot as it at the same time dropped to her feet. She took a step after him into ally mouth and took another step as he slowly inched back further from the entry. "Dom," she began, "are you all right? You seem…odd."

"I'm great Kel, really. It's you I'm worried about." He took another step back followed by two more till he was eaten away from her sight by shadows. There was no noise then. No crunch of snow under boots or even a whistle in the wind.

"Dom?" she squinted to see him. Something told Kel that she should wait till he came back out to talk to him or go around to the ally's exit. She trusted Dom, had since forever, but he was drunk. He had to be. Without sense in her actions she took a step forward before following him into the dark. It wrapped her like a chilling blanket. "What do you mean?"

Something hot slammed into her, but not harshly. It pressed her to the frozen wall with enough force to make her gasp though. It pinned her there and it wasn't till she lifted her hands and felt fabric on her fingers did she realize that it was Dom holding her there. Dom's chest pressed to hers to keep her in place. She scrambled, not knowing what to think of the feeling spreading through her, trying to get away. It was no use. He had her barred in with his arms held up, palms flat on the wall at her back. "Dom-" she breathed but he cut her off.

"I've been thinking." His tone was hushed, husky even. Kel felt his chest vibrate with the intensity in his voice. It made the back on her knees weaken and she leaned forward. Dom seemed perfectly fine with that, pressing her harder against the wall with his body. He put pressure on her hips to keep her up and she almost gasped at the sensation it sent rocketing through her. Dom continued, oblivious to her reaction. "Nights when I'm with you you've seemed a little more normal in the morning, like your old self. I don't know if it is from the company, though you didn't notice me really a few times, you were already asleep, or something else but it seemed to help. Like you hadn't had the nightmares or forgot them all together." There was a pause. "I want to make a deal with you, more like an arrangement really."

"What?" She was so confused at the moment Kel just wanted to sit down in the snow and think. His body heat was doing maddening things to her brain.

"I'm willing to be a distraction." He explained his voice still low. "Get your mind away from certain thoughts before you go to bed, ware you down a little." He leaned in closer to her, his mouth by her ear. "There's nothing more comforting then a warm body next to you."

"You're offering ss...s-"

"Sex."

His breath scorched her skin and she tried to break away from him, scared of what she would do. His arms moved and took hold of both her biceps, pulling her back. "How long have I known you?" he asked, holding her tightly to him. She looked at him oddly, what was his point? He was offering her something like _this_ and all he could ask was how long they'd been friends? She remained silent and Dom smiled shortly to himself, bringing his face to her neck. "Please answer me." He whispered against her skin, kissing her at the nape below her ear. Kel wiggled against him and the wall as he nibbled her lobe, producing a sound between a sigh and a whine. "How long?" he asked quietly.

"Around si…ah! Stop!" she gasped when he bit down harder, but still lightly, making his presence better known. He wanted her panting when she answered him. He wanted her to feel the attraction.

"What was that you were saying before?" he murmured. His mouth wondered from her ear, moving down her jaw line and to her neck. His long nose moved softly down her neck in a line, stopping every so often to leave behind a bruising kiss. At the nape of her neck he showered her with soft butterfly kisses that made Kel dizzy.

"Six years." She answered breathlessly in a whisper. She couldn't pronounce her words fully, but it didn't matter. Dom just wanted her to say it. He knew the answer very well.

"And how old are you?" Another question he knew.

"Twenty."

"And I?"

"Dom-" He lightly ran the tip of his tongue up her neck, cutting off her objection and making her shiver. He drew his face level to hers, holding himself so his nose touched hers. His breath was warm against her face, and she was surprised she couldn't smell any of the liquor he drank on him. Oddly enough he smelt like the juice she had been drinking. "Twenty-six," she answered, her lips brushing just barely against his as she spoke, but not in a kiss. Her heart tightened when his wide mouth smiled.

"See?" he asked; voice cheerful but still hushed. His dark hair tickled her cheek. "I've known you since you were fourteen. I can tell when you're upset and I don't want anything or anyone to hurt you. I would never purposely harm you, Kel. We're close to the same age, both old enough to partake in such activities. There's no reason not to, and it's worth a try. If it helps….it could be worth it."

She couldn't think of a reason to say no. Truthfully she wanted it terribly, wanted him. Just to know how it felt, to know how _he_ felt, even just once. He was confusing her, watching her with no commiseration for her distress. She didn't like it and Kel shoved him back. Dom took a step back from her more, looking at her squarely. He grinned. "This doesn't change our friendship Kel, or my offer."

"Go back to the barracks, Dom." Kel tried to put lead in her words, but they wobbled helplessly. She didn't wait for him to leave, she couldn't. Instead she turned and walked quickly from the ally.

She worked to make her steps even, but she stumbled a few times. Kel wanted to run. Run from her desires and needs. He's drunk, she told herself as she trudged through the snow blindly. He'll forget it by the morning. It'll never come up again.

But she knew it would. Kel would never let herself forget the feeling on his skin on hers, his lips on her. She was incapable of it. She walked faster in the snow, straight into the stinging wind. She closed her eyes as she walked, working her way through the fort by memory so the wind wouldn't bring her eyes to water. That was the last thing she wanted. Tears.

She climbed the battlements and greeted the men on watch. Silently she found her own empty spot on the wall and looked off at the frosty darkness before her, trying not to think. It was impossible. Her heart began to pick up when she remembered his fingers, his breath, _him_. She couldn't think those thoughts though. Kel wouldn't let herself and shoved them back with other thoughts. Tomorrow she would work with her _shukusen_ with Yuki for the wedding. Dom would be there. Kel winced. She could ignore him but for the dance. She wasn't fooling herself. That was going to be hard.

This is all your fault, she thought to think air. She didn't know who to place the blame on. Obviously Dom had initiated the whole situation, but she hadn't moved to stop it till it was far too late. She had let it progress into something that could ruin everything.

I won't let it. She thought fierily. One stupid, drunken accident won't ruin our friendship.

"Neal!" Dom whined back at the barracks. He was quite content with himself, letting the pictures flash in his memory. It was a numbing feeling in his chest, relaxing. He was trying to meet that feeling with another from his drink, but the spirit wasn't taking affect. He turned to his cousin. "Don't you have anything stronger then this?"

Neal grinned at him, throwing a set of dice. "Of course, but not for you. We switched your drinks after you got here Dom. That just juice."

Dom eyed his cup with resentment. How could he not notice? He would admit his mind was on other things, but he should have been able to tell. "And why is it you did such a terrible thing?"

"You're in command now Dom." Aiden said as he grudgingly palmed Neal a few coppers. He wasn't having a good night with his bets. "I doubt Kel would find it amusing if you staggered around drunk. You have work to do."

Dom grinned widely. "She could never be mad at me." He said it with confidence, his next words more suggestive then he intended. "I wouldn't let her."

Neal turned to look at him. "Watch it," he cautioned sharply. Kel was as good as a sister to him. Dom was like his brother. Between the two of them he knew Kel could take care of herself better then Dom, but he would defend her from his cousin if needed. "There are several ways to kill with healing magic. Remember that."

"I didn't mean anything by it, Sir Meathead. Calm down."

"You better not call Yuki that once were married." Neal warned as he counted his bets.

The next morning Kel was determined not to remember the night before. Dom on the other hand wasn't as willing. At breakfast Kel felt something knock into her knee, and then quickly pull away. She didn't think anything of it and didn't look up from her food. The table was crowded that morning with a mixture of her knight friends, Buri and Yuki, and some men from the Own. Kel was pressed between Merric and Fal who were nodding off every so often. Merric sulking as he toyed with his food. Apparently Lalasa took advantage of Merric's sleep-ridden state and gave him a fitting. He wasn't happy about it.

"Where did you go off to last night?" Fal asked her sleepily. His eyes were half lidded and his smile droopy. "Missed some pretty interesting challenges."

"I went to check up on Jump and let him out for a bit. When I got back to my room I accidentally fell asleep." It wasn't all a lie. She did accidentally fall asleep but up on the wall. Her body was stiff and achy from the experience.

Something hit her knee again.

"What are those purple marks on your neck?" Yuki asked. She reached across Neal on the opposite end of the table and touched a spot on Kel's neck. Then another. "Their bruises. Where'd you get them?"

Kel had made a lie for that when she noticed them that morning after she found out that her bruise balm did nothing to help this sort of bruise, if that is what they truly were. Her lie wasn't a good one, but it would service. "Well you did whack me a few times yesterday. I would have been shocked if it didn't leave a mark."

Yuki's dark brows came down. "I don't remember hitting your neck."

Kel shrugged and took a bite of food, allowing the conversation to change itself. "Hopefully you'll take pity on me and not hit me too hard. I've never used a _shukusen_ before." Dom who sat on the other side of Neal said amiably making Yuki laugh and agree, saying she was a nice teacher.

"And as particular as Oakbridge the master of ceremonies." Kel told Dom companionably. "When I was a squire she taught me a few new tricks. Gave me more bruises then Milord on horseback." Dom looked at the Yamani in false fear.

Yuki blushed. "Your form was terrible. The only way to fix it was force you to."

"Force me into more cuts and bruises then I needed. It was almost as bad as feeding the griffin." Every one at the table laughed at the comparison and Yuki hid her own smile behind her fan. Something under the table hit Kel's leg again and she looked up. Dom's eyes caught and held hers. Kel swallowed hard.

A slow smile spread over his face and Dom winked. He slid his knee to rest on the outside of hers and hooked his calf around hers. He never pulled his eyes from hers as she felt fingers on her knee.

Kel pulled back as if she had been burned, and she had. His fingers scorched through her breeches and burned her skin. She was sure if she checked later there would be marks. She couldn't look at him and concentrated on her food. Fear rolled up her throat suddenly. Did anyone notice?

Her eyes flicked up at the table and she purposely looked at the end furthest from Dom. No one there noticed. Slowly her eyes shifted up the table, looking at every person's face. The Own was nursing their hangovers and not paying attention to her torment, too intent on their own to notice her. Fal had his head on the table and Merric was leaning against her, his eyes closed. They didn't see anything. Yuki was talking animatedly with Buri a few seats away which was odd behavior for her. She was more Tortallan then she gave herself credit for.

Then Kel's eyes rested on Neal. He had both hands on the table, curled into fists, one holding a knife. He was looking at her harshly, but it wasn't quite a glare. His face grew harder when he turned his look to Dom who coolly took a sip of water and stood. He clapped his visibly steaming cousin on the back and walked over to dump his trey. Neal stabbed a piece of ham on his plate, missing the wink Dom threw Kel before he exited.

"Tell me if he does something. If he gives you any problems don't resist in any urges you have." Neal advised, not knowing what kind of urges she did have. Kel almost laughed at the implication he would have been giving her if he did know. Neal ripped a chunk of meat off of his plate and speared it with the tip of his knife. He held it up to his lips like it was a fork. "His left leg is his weak spot." Neal popped the piece of meat in his mouth and stabbed another.

Yuki saw and smacked his shoulder. "Don't act like a barbarian Nealan." She scolded and Neal flinched at the use of his full name. Kel chuckled, doing her best to make her voice normal. She didn't want Neal mad at Dom. She didn't want anyone know about Dom's offer and behavior. She had to act normal so others would think it was.

After diner Kel went to her rooms and grabbed her fan. Domitan jumped to her shoulder and settled there. When Alanna saw him her eyes brightened noticeably and she laughed. She scratched Domitan and the scruff and he purred, jumping to her. Alanna let him loop around her neck and Kel grinned. It seemed the older knight had a love for cats. Magical or not.

Kel left them with each other and walked to Yuki. She was grumbling curse words under her breath in Yamani, complaining of the snow and ridiculous males. Neal and Dom were a few feet from her, tossing two closed fans back and forth between each other. It was actually a humorous thing to watch. They would beam at the other when they caught it by the base and run shrieking when they didn't think they could land the catch. Neal's hand was already bleeding slightly, but Dom was yet to be cut.

"I've got a knack." He proclaimed when the two broke apart. He pointed the end of the fan at Kel grinning. "I could take on our Protector already."

Yuki snorted and pulled out her own fan. She hit Dom hard on the shoulder without resistance. He hissed and dropped his pointed arm, glaring at the little woman. "If you weren't about to become family I would get you for that."

"No you wouldn't." Neal drawled and came to his wife's side. He draped a protective arm over her shoulders, pulling her to him. "I wouldn't let you."

"Are we going to practice?" Kel asked, feeling this had gone on long enough. They turned to look at her as if noticing her for the first time. She scowled at them. "If not I could find more important things to do. Neal, I think you should go back to the infirmary. Merric's out with a patrol and not himself today. He insisted he was fine but he's a little off kilter which means you might get him as a patient later. The Own isn't in the best shape either," she glared at Dom. "You may see some of them later if there's an accident."

"What?" Dom asked in response to the glare. "I didn't drink."

"I saw you."

"It was fruit juice." Dom told her, snapping his fan open then shut again. Kel noticed it as one of Yuki's. If he broke it she would kill him. "They switched my drink."

He hadn't been drunk. He had meant what he said. Kel shook it off quickly. No, she still wouldn't think of it. She snapped her fan open and the light bounced off the pale blue silk. "Let's start."

Dom wasn't as confident after the first practice dance, in fact he was sweating and in a blind panic. He had dropped the fan several times and froze almost every time it came down to him. Kel couldn't help but giggle. This man had fought in wars and battles. He was having difficulty throwing a fan. After a while Yuki just had him throw it for himself till he got used to the feeling. Alanna took his place in the circle and they began a game.

It was little over an hour when Dom began to complain. "I got it," he insisted and Yuki had him stand with Kel. Slowly they tossed a single fan back and forth and it was true Dom had the throw down, but his catch was a little off. Kel stopped the throwing.

Dom watched as Kel walked to him and grabbed his hand. Her fingers seared into his as she positioned his grip on the fan. "Every time it comes at you grab it like this." She instructed. "Catch it any other way and you have a better risk of being cut. Catch it like this and you're never cut."

"Tricky missy," he mumbled as he studied his finger placements. He burned them to memory before looking at Kel again. It took everything he had not to grab her like last night, and slowly he was beginning to regret his rashness. No, never. He couldn't regret the decision. Not when he remembered the sensation that filled him as his lips swept her neck. Remembering it only made him want to do it again and again.

Only in due time, he told himself. The thought made him bash himself internally. Suddenly he felt like a villain, like he was pealing Kel from her innocence. He watched her as she walked back to her spot in the snow. It was more like dancing. Her booted feet knocked snow up around her in a glittering flurry, some sticking to her breeches and sparkled before melting as she turned to face him again. She moved with catlike grace as her jumped to catch the open fan he threw to her. The metal caught the light and shimmered as she spun, gently tossing it back to him.

Dom held out his hand and caught it as she instructed, the metal pressing coolly into his palm and his fingers quickly fell into place. He tossed it so it would cartwheel in the air before Kel caught it. She grinned at him, a sign he was doing well. He basked in the approval.

Dom watched closely as she worked a spin into her throw and caught the fan when it came to him. Her elegant movements didn't cover one thing. She was a killer, maybe not by nature, but physically she was lethal. Her toxic movements as she caught the fan and threw it again were deadly accurate. He watched as her muscles danced beneath her clothes, lean and smooth as she jumped and turned. There wasn't a thing innocent about her. She was implacable in her steps, every move fatal to his survival. One sharp thrust and quick spin and Dom would be dead, but she had control.

If she wanted to she could kill him, but she wouldn't. Kel was kind, gracious, loving, supportive, caring, sympathetic, gentle, thoughtful, compassionate, benevolent, and considerate. His list could go on forever. She was also brutal when needed, like when she was fighting, and forbidding, but Kel was never spiteful. She wasn't the vindictive sort and no where near callous and merciless. Kel was charitable yes, and empathetic with a kind heart, but she wasn't innocent. She could take care of herself. She could be ruthless if needed. She was an adult, mature and fully developed. If she accepted his offer it was her choice. He wasn't forcing it on her. It was her option to say yes or no. He just prayed for her sake and his she would say yes. For that one moment in the ally he had felt whole as she leaned into him, dizzy with his touch. Her smell had intoxicated him and Dom could still smell her on his skin. Her spicy and sweet scent was burned in his nose but he wanted it now more then ever.

He tried the turn he had watched her do before throwing the fan, twisting his body before snapping forward again. Kel jumped and caught the fan, grinning as she landed. Both she and Dom were panting. "You're getting better," she told him as she twirled the fan over her hand and then the other. She watched the others throw the fans higher.

Dom watched them as well as they opened the fans in the air to make a rainbow blur. He winced as they sped up. "But I'm still beginning." He muttered as he watched them. He looked at Kel out of the corner of his eyes. She was standing at rest, her arms crossed over her chest and her fan tucked up the crook of her elbow. Dom took his advantage and moved to her side, draping his arm over her shoulders. He drew lines on her shoulder with the tip of his finger.

Kel stiffened and tugged back instantly. Dom let his arm drop to his side and kept it there. "I'm not going to force you into anything Kel." He told her sincerely. "It's your choice."

"No," she said gruffly and he smiled.

"Not so fast. I want you to actually think on it. I want you to talk with me about it," he saw her wince at the concept and frowned. "Does that bother you?"

"No," she pushed her voice low as if she thought the wind would grab it and throw it the every set of ears. "It doesn't bother me at all."

Dom grinned. "Don't lie. You don't like to talk about sex." She squirmed at the use of the word, like he was throwing it around as a too casual phrase. "It's just intercourse. Making love, coitus, mating, sex, call it what you want. It's human nature. Instinct."

"Please Dom." She looked at him with pleading eyes. Dom's stomach jumped with surprise and delight. Behind a careful shield he could see want. He could see her desire for what he offered. "Just stop," she begged.

His eyes were soft but Dom shook his head. "No. I'll let you think on it, I'll wait as long as it takes with an open invitation, but I won't let you forget." He trailed his hand up her back, tracing her spine to make his point. She trembled. "Little reminders, like at breakfast, to prompt you."

"Neal's going to kill you if he learns what you're talking about." She warned him. Dom knew it took a lot at the moment for her to keep her voice smooth. He saw her nails sink into her arm to stop her from something. He wanted to pull her hand away and grip it so she couldn't do it again. "He already gave me permission to hurt you at need. He wants me to tell him if you do anything."

"Will you?" He doodled aimlessly between her shoulder blades. Dom could care less about his cousin at the moment. It was her and him he wanted to discuss.

"No." She didn't move to rid herself of his hand and it elated Dom to a point he couldn't wash away his grin. "He'd kill you, then probably me and the rest of the fort. I can't let that happen."

She made a joke. Dom could have bubbled over with hysterical laughter just out of joy then if it wasn't for the horn call. Kel's head shot up as she saw a riding party come in. She knocked away Dom's hand and began walking to Merric's patrol. Dom growled under his breath at the lost touch.

"Yuki keep teaching Dom." Kel instructed as she walked over to the group of riders. She noticed some blood on swords and on the men. Merric looked about to fall from the saddle. Kel steadied him when he dismounted. There was a cut going down his thigh that slowly leaked blood. His halberd slipped and fell to the ground. One of the hostlers picked it up as he led the horse away.

"Hand full of spidrens." He gasped, putting weight on his damaged leg. Kel moved to his other side and braced him, walking him to the infirmary after calling for the other men to have themselves checked. Kel demanded for all of them to attend no matter how small the scratch. She wouldn't have them die of infection. Merric continued to brief her. "There's no raiders out there. They're all frozen further up north but the immortals, _Mithros_, they're everywhere. There were ogres, goddess bless the fact they're not rash. I wouldn't want to take on something that big. There were even wyverns. I haven't seen them since I was little in the Immortals war. Didn't see any giant's but we found prints. How could they possibly have had so many with them?"

"Scanra was safer for them. Everyone was spread apart or in the capital. There was more of a chance for them to survive before the war. Now they're filtering into us." Kel frowned. "That's going to cause trouble."

"We ran past a centaur group when we were headed back, but I didn't dare have the men associate with them. I couldn't tell if they were rouge or not and the men were already bruised. We wouldn't be able to take on a whole herd."

"When Milord comes back he'll go out with a squad and check them out." Kel assured him. She led him into the infirmary and let him sit on a cot, wincing when his leg bent.

"Why Lord Roual?" Merric asked as he shed his tunic and shirt. He had a cut going over his chest that Kel had missed. "Why not just have you go out with a squad if you want to pull rank?"

"It's not that," she argued, taking his clothes and passing them to an assistant. "Milord has had experience with the centaur. He would be better at communicating and setting boundaries with them. He-"

"Doesn't get offers to mate with them." Neal interjected as he came to Merric's side. Kel glared at him.

"How'd you know that?" she demanded. The Own had given her a hard time with that fact and still irked her with it on occasions.

"My dear cousin told me a while back." Neal told her absently as he directed Merric to lay back. His hand glowed a faint green. "I thought you were just trying to get rid of me earlier. I didn't think we'd really get any wounded patrols today."

Merric looked at Kel in mock hurt, and then real pain as Neal touched his leg. "You didn't trust me Commander?" Merric asked through gritted teeth.

"You when you're fully awake always." She smiled, feeling out of place in the suddenly lively infirmary. "When you're not, never. Don't even bother writing up a report till Neal tells me you're revived from the blood loss."

Merric coughed a laugh through his pain. "Don't worry Mother, I wasn't planning to. Not all of us enjoy writing reports."

Kel bowed out then, she had new work to do now that her fort was in a possible red zone. Wyldon would want another report, she needed to recheck the battlements, and the refugees needed to know of the new threat. Kel sparked at the chance for action, to be a combat knight like she wanted rather then riding a desk, but part of her sank. The refugee's were now in danger along with herself and her friends. There was the chance of new nightmares to come. She shook it off. It was a knight's life. She could live it as well as any other.

Kel looked around when she was out of the infirmary, breathing in air that wasn't tainted with the metallic sent of blood. Hollow blue eyes caught hers before disappearing. Kel's stomach twisted sharply. No, she could go through a knight's life alone. She didn't need the kind of companionship he was offering, no matter how much she wanted it. Dom irked her in a way. How he could be like her but still not. He had said he had nightmares, and his eyes held the same empty void her felt in her gut. Was he feeling as she was? Would it be better for the both of them to go through it together?

She had too much to think of, too many complicated thoughts. They all screamed for her attention at once and her temples throbbed. Without willing herself to Kel considered Dom's offer. It stuck with her, she couldn't shake it. Walking through the snow she didn't even bother to try and push him back this time. He had sunk claws into her core and she wouldn't shove the sergeant out of place. He was stuck on her, and there was nothing she could do to counter that.


	8. Chapter 8

Meeting the Herd

The next few days moved quickly and were a blur of work and planning. The battlements had every weapon at hand and since it was immortals they were dealing with blazebalm was brought out and stored by the Drop-holes where they could be used at need. The refugees were panicked briefly with the new threat but began getting back to their work once they realized the situation was being handled. Kel sent out armed guards to make sure Raoul came back safely which he wasn't completely pleased with.

"I'm a knight." He told her the moment he came through the gates. "I didn't spend years of training for nothing." He seethed when she reminded him there weren't any immortals around all those years back when he trained. He dismounted. "Same thing, a knight's a knight."

The next morning he wasn't in any lighter mood and neither was Buri. "The wedding is delayed for now. The best time for it will probably be summer and no sooner." Buri informed them as Raoul glowered into his food. Startled eyes stared at them before turning to Neal and Yuki.

"No," Neal growled at the silent question. "The wedding is still going to happen." He turned to Yuki. "We still only have a week."

"One week and we're all a nice heap of glittering silk and an appalling golden hue. _Can't wait_." Dom drawled sarcastically. His hand was rested just lightly on top of Kel's under the table, stroking her fingers as his reminder. Though she knew she should Kel didn't pull back. She had forgotten how big his hands really were and the number of scars he owned to. His hand on hers actually made hers look dainty and pale in comparison. He turned her hand over and began tracing the lines on her palm, and she noticed he favored her scars rather then the natural creases there. He seemed to compare their skin tone, scars, and even size. He balanced her hand on his palm once and her fingers only went up to his second set of knuckles. Curling his fingers they covered the tops of hers.

Neal glared at his cousin. "You sound as pretentious as a court lady having to wear a dress made last minute. You're as good as a court lady, the amount of time it takes for you to get ready for any kind of function."

"And you're not, Meathead?"

"No, I'm not."

Kel chuckled and her friends turned to her. "You groom yourself more then a cat, Meathead." She stroked Domitan, who was sitting on her lap licking his paws, for emphasis. "You spent hours preparing for serving duty for Mid Winter and always made a fuss over your hair. You still did as a squire and I'm sure Yuki would say that you still do now."

Neal turned to his fiancée and raised and arched brow. To slow to hide the smile Yuki covered her mouth with her fan and nodded. Neal threw his hands in the air. "You've turned my own fiancée against me!"

After midday Kel and half the King's Own rode out from the fort with her and Raoul at the lead. He grinned at her, his mood seemingly better. "I'll talk things through with your little immortals. You have nothing to worry about." He teased her.

"Just don't fall from your horse." She shot back at him grinning.

"I haven't done that for a long while, Lady Keladry." The men heard, and they found themselves in the same conversation as they had been when she had first been Raoul's squire.

"Only twice on the ride back from Giant Killer." On of the men she sent for him called from the flank of their party.

"Then on our way to the capital," Flyn added.

Raoul turned on him. "_Insolent cur_."

When the company spotted the centaur herd it wasn't difficult stopping them. Seeing a company of their size made the herd stop in their tracks. "Stay back. If we need help we'll send for you. Flyn, Lerant, and Kel, let's move forward."

Kel nodded and nudged Hoshi forward. The centaurs shifted when they saw the advancing four and two rode ahead to meet them half way. They're tame, Kel observed as she watched the advancing two. They looked like the typical centaurs she had seen over the years. The torso of a human joined at the human's waist to the horse's withers where the neck would be. Out of the other liminal beings that now roamed the realms they were the friendliest, though they didn't associate with humans often and had a some rouges. These seemed civilized enough. She watched as the herd moved to place the children in the middle with the women. The men circled around them protectively, the adolescent males sending more then a few cautious glances to the four riders.

The approaching two had their weapons bare, but they were at rest with their bows hooked over their shoulders. The older one was holding a few arrows in hand while the younger had a quiver full on his other shoulder. When they stopped in front of them they eyed Kel. She remembered the inspection they were giving her from when she was fourteen. It was almost the same, but maybe a bit more appreciative. Kel could only imagine; she was five eleven now and still a strong build. The centaurs bowed their heads each.

The eldest had silver hair spilling over his tan shoulder. The other looked awkward next to him. He was young, an adolescent by all appearances, with cropped black hair and a harsh look when he lifted his head. Raoul cleared his throat. "I believe introductions are to be made." He commented conversationally. He grinned to the immortals. "I'm Raoul of Goldenlake and Malorie's Peak. This is Lady Knight Keladry of Mindelan, Protector of the Small." Kel glared at him for the unnecessary add on, but Raoul didn't even notice her look. He introduced Flyn and Larent swiftly and explained the Own's bulk behind them. "We were hoping to discuss a few things with you if that would be fine. Recently we have gotten a rather large flow of immortals coming in and out of the area and we would like to sift through them and see any trouble."

The silver haired one grinned as friendly as Raoul. He was a dun on his horse half and his human skin was weathered and held a glowing copper tone. He could have been Carthaki from the waist up by his looks. Kel was relieved to see he was good natured. Centaurs could be good, bad, or a mixture of both. She liked that she wasn't seeing any bad side, a hopeful sign. The young male didn't seemed quite as good natured. He was still scowling, though it seemed directed at her more then the other three and his fingers danced over the belt around his waist. There were no knifes present, but there were signs that there had been recently. Kel bet the elder had commanded him to disarm himself. His eyes flashed as he studied their mounts coldly, and Kel remembered centaurs considered horses slaves. She stroked Hoshi on the withers when the mare began to fidget. Kel whispered reassuringly to her and the young centaur blew a snort through his nose.

"It would be beneficial for the herds safety to learn about the surrounding homo-sapiens." The eldest said it more to the youth then to the worriers. He looked at Kel, then back to Raoul who was obviously in charge of the discussions. "I am Blackhoof, herd elder and chief." He bobbed his silver head. He looked to the adolescent at his side.

"Ezhno," the young centaur replied and ducked his head as Blackhoof had. It was an odd name; Kel had never heard anything like it before. The other names she had heard them use normally had something to do with their appearance or suroundings. Ezhno could have been named several things from his appearance. To match his hair his eyes were black, a brown so dark you couldn't tell the color. His skin was tight over muscles and glittered pale before connecting to pale grey horse withers. Pink and red scars ran over him like decoration, showing a harsh life even for the lack of years on him. From his human half he looked about Kel's age, maybe two or three years younger. His face never changed in expression as he looked back up at them, his scowl fixed into place. Kel looked to Blackhoof again when Ezhno caught her eyes on him.

"My apprentice is a bit of a recluse." Blackhoof said apologetically. He glared at Ezhno and snorted. "He doesn't realize he'll have to communicate with outsiders when he takes my place." Ezhno stamped at the ice below him at the comment.

"We would just like to understand your herd. Come to a bit of an understanding." Kel said calmly. "I'm the commander of a nearby fort. I would like to know that it would be safe for my refugees to move around freely. No offence, but we've had trouble with other centaurs in towns and such."

Blackhoof shook his head. "No offence. We know our kinds natures can vary. We were actually a section of a larger herd that we have separated ourselves from. Starvation in Scanra this time of year is fatal and the winter is harsh on us. Tortall still has its bad weather, but nothing like the storms in Scanra. We aren't looking to raid any villages; our former herd hardly got any profit from their thefts. There is less populous in this area, more room for hunting and such."

"May our men stake down their horses?" Raoul asked courteously. "It would be best to discuss other matters before dark."

Blackhoof agreed without hesitation and Flyn called the Own forward. Kel rode Hoshi over to the horses and dismounted. The Own were all taking the saddles from their mounts and placing them on the spare riding blankets to keep them from the snow. Kel watched as the men moved closer to the herd, but not enough that they merged. A few younger centaurs ventured over in groups and pairs and the men communicated with them easily. Young fillies and colts tugged at the men's burnooses and giggled at their jokes. Adults watched them closely, but smiled at the youngling's antics.

Kel pulled her own burnoose back from her shoulders and sifted through one of her saddle bags for a comb. She wasn't going to involve herself in the conversation between Blackhoof and Raoul. Kel knew her presence wouldn't be needed and she wanted to do something with her hands rather then discuss hunting boundaries. Finding a comb she went to Hoshi and began working the tangles from the mare's thick mane. As she fixed the forelock Kel ran her finger over the white star that was half concealed by the brown hair. Hoshi blew on her gently and Kel traded in the comb for a curry and got to work on removing dust from the horses barrel. Hoshi's withers quivered and she gave a pleased grunt.

Snow crunched behind Kel but she didn't acknowledge it. Hoshi whinnied and blew out a snort, stomping a warning hoof. "Do you treat all your serfs so well?" A throaty voice murmured harshly from her side. The air around her shifted in aroma, smelling like lemongrass and earth, something that wasn't expected till mid spring. Kel twisted quickly. She dropped the curry in shock as she met dark eyes no more then six inches from her face.

Kel remained silent till her heart slowed to normal, staring back into Ezhno's eyes without flinching. When she was level again Kel broke eye contact and bent to get the fallen curry. She felt him watching her and met his eyes again when she stood straight. "I treat both my horses the same." She murmured as she packed away the grooming tool. "I only have two; one for battle and tilting and another for travel." She pulled the comb out again and moved to Hoshi's flank, patting her along the way so the mare wouldn't be spooked.

Ezhno watched Kel as she softly smoothed out the horses long tail, catching seemingly every knot. His voice was husky as if he had just been bellowing for the past hour and he throat was dry. "She doesn't seem like she's seen much fighting." He said, referring to Hoshi.

Kel glanced at him from the corner of her eye before turning back to her work. "She's my rider. Peachblossom, my gelding, is my war horse; very big strawberry roan, kind of old, plenty of scars with a bad temper. I obtained him as a page at the palace. His previous owner was abusive and marked him with scrapes and gashes from rowels. He was too big for me for years but I still rode him to keep his from being put down."

"Very heroic," Ezhno sneered.

Kel looked at him, her face a void of emotion. "He's my watch horse, saved my life countless times in battle. We're a team, nothing heroic or prideful about it. He watches my life and I return the favor."

It was silent and Kel began to move around. She grabbed Hoshi's wool blanket and covered her from withers to flank again, smoothing the blanket of its wrinkles. Tapping the mares leg she silently asked for her hoof. Hoshi complied and lifted it for Kel, letting her check for any bits of rock or ice that may have gotten stuck during the ride. After checking each hoof and giving them a scraping Kel stood straight, content that Hoshi was set. The mare yielded and let her owner tether her to the ground.

Ezhno was still there, watching her as she finished. She turned to him, looking back at him silently, waiting for him to say what he wanted. She fumed internally when he looked her over, eyes skimming over every inch of her body. Kel didn't move, it didn't even look as though she was breathing. Her face stayed Yamani calm as Ezhno smirked and moved closer to her. He reminded her of Greystreak as he began circling her. Each time he made a pass he met her eyes, his showing amusement.

"You're lucky," he finally murmured.

Kel held her body naturally, relaxed but still unmoving, "And why is that?" she asked.

He stopped circling behind her. His tail flicked against her leg and she suppressed a shutter that would show her mortification. "If you waited till spring and the snow had melted to catch us you would've caught the stallions in heat." Ezhno chuckled as a light flush passed her face, but it was gone in moments. Kel could see his disappointment about that. "Don't get me wrong, you walk past a few of them now and there'll be frisking for sure." He eyes her hips pointedly. "You may birth our kind and wouldn't be as hard to please as our women. One may try to mount-"

"Enough," she stopped him there. Kel knew this conversation would come up at some point. "I don't care."

"Well, that's fair rude." Ezhno told her contemptuously.

"What's rude is eyeing the Lady like so." Kel let herself cringe and close her eyes at the voice. She wouldn't show embarrassment when it was for Ezhno's amusement, but this was different. As Dom moved around a neighboring horse Kel let herself feel her humiliation. It was one thing for Ezhno to say these thing to just her, but for him to say them to her with Dom listening was mortifying.

Dom came to her side and draped his arm over her shoulders without permission. A few fillies had followed him and looked at her curiously. They had obviously not seen such a large woman in their life's, if they had even seen a human woman. One of them took a hold of the loose cloth of her pants and tugged, making them fall lower on Kel's hips. She giggled when Kel swore and adjusted them back into place. She pulled back from Dom's loose hold and glared at him. "Do you follow me wherever I go?" she asked in annoyed repartee.

"Yes." He replied off handedly, like it was common knowledge. "Do you often talk about reproducing with immortals you just met? You're too scared to talk about it with me, but you'll talk to him about it." He directed his look to Ezhno who was looking smug. Kel blanched. He just had to pull that up now.

"I wasn't saying anything."

"Good." Dom grinned brilliantly at her and Kel's knees went weak seeing his lips curl up. Damn it, she thought as he wrapped his arm around her waist as if to steady her and didn't retract his arm. She wished he knew what he did to her for just that moment so he'd just stop. I have the fort to watch, the immortals to track, things to do, knights work, Kel rambled with herself. I don't have time to think about…_that_. But apparently she hadn't the choice. Dom's arm tightened as he looked to the young centaur. "Blackhoof asked for your presence. He'd like for you to converse with a knight."

"Didn't I just?"

A noise erupted from Dom's chest that Kel could only describe as a growl. "He said converse, not torture."

Ezhno smirked and bobbed his head to Kel, claiming a victory in angering both of them. "It was pleasant chatting with you Lady Keladry." He looked to Dom who made the growl noise again. Kel could have laughed at it. He really was a cur. "Sergeant," Ezhno said before turning to rejoin the herd and find Blackhoof at a trot.

It was silent. Kel tried to craftily move from Dom's hold but only managed to provoke him to pull her closer to him making the fillies giggle more. Kel liked children, but at the moment she just wanted them to pass. She got her wish when one of the sparrows zipped past and the two chased after it, jumping to try to catch it. Dom watched them as they quickly kept pace under the bird. "You know what? Sometimes I myself would like two more legs."

"Why's that Dom, so you could shove another foot in your mouth?" Kel blurted out without thinking.

Dom feigned disappointment, shaking his head. "The Lioness is beginning to rub off on you, isn't she?" he teased. "Ever since she arrived you've been more temperamental then usual."

"If I had the Lionesses temper, Dom, you would only have one hand by now." Kel informed him, trying to tug out of his grip again. She looked around for any watchers. There were none, Dom had them hid securely between Hoshi and another Own's horse.

Damn him, she thought as he chuckled at her.

"You wouldn't do that even with her to prompt you. It's a known fact the Lioness has a soft spot for handsome men. Even look at her husband. A former thief now married to the Kings Champion when she should have had him arrested, that's devotion. No, you wouldn't cut off my hand." He twisted a piece of her hair, smirking. "You're just as devoted to me." She snorted and wiggled to free herself yet again. "Trying to run from me?" He asked innocently and tightened his grip making her squeak. "Nope, not happening. I don't want you running off to have some other man…thing mount you."

"Are all your relatives this pigheaded?"

Dom shook his head sadly. "No, only the men I'm afraid. The midwifes don't even have to check for our gender at birth. They just know if we're boy our girl if we have a snout or not. My mother dressed me in dresses for days before she realized I was just blessed with such a perfect nose unlike my poor unfortunate cousin."

Kel grinned. "You and Neal have the same nose."

Dom gasped and ducked his head, his hair falling in his face. He nuzzled his nose under her ear and Kel yelped in shock. "I'm hurt," he muttered, his breath warming her skin. "You compare my looks to that of Sir Meathead."

"You also have the same brows." She reminded him and he growled into her throat, tickling her with his lips. "You know," she said thoughtfully, "there's a full moon tonight. Will you sprout claws and a tail and run rampant in the fort? Is so I'd like to lock you outside the walls."

"Hmm…maybe, but I'd have to bring a hostage with me." He mumbled. Kel yelped again when he gave her a playful bite on the top of her ear. "I'd need a snack. You'd survive, but what life will you live after such trauma?"

She laughed at his suddenly gloomy voice. "What life indeed. Maybe Paush Poornima will spare you for one rotation."

Dom pulled his head back. "What?" he asked, looking more confused then necessary. Kel had to laugh again.

Kel looked at him in mock scorn. "How could you possibly forget? It was only five years ago." She huffed. "A month before I turned fifteen, May, if you forgot," Dom scowled at her for that comment, "we returned to the Bahzir for a bit before going to Corus to join the Great Progress. The night before we left they had us join them at the fire. They told us the old legends and taught the men the moon names. Paush Poornima for January. Magh Poornima for February-"

"How can I remember what I can't even say?" he interrupted her. "I can't even pronounce that."

"That, Dom, is because you're inadequate." She teased. Kel pronounced the name slowly for him, sounding it out. When he repeated it for her it came out like he had his mouth full of food. She said the other which only resulted in her getting spit on her cheek. She flicked it away making a face at him while he looked at her sheepishly. Kel said a phrase in Yamani and he repeated it as well, but with a better turn out.

"What did I say?"

Kel giggled helplessly. "Well, I said 'A courtyard common to all will be swept by none.' It's an old Yamani proverb. You said…um, 'A barn to commence adultery'." She looked at him with raised brows. "I don't know where you got that slogan from, but your accent was good."

She giggled again seeing his face. "Don't laugh at me." He pouted that ridiculous pout, poking out his lower lip. "What other proverbs do you know, Warden of all Wisdom?"

Kel grinned, eyes brightening in memory. "Mama would always tease Papa with the proverb, 'A good husband is healthy and absent.' He'd just laugh at her and say, 'A dog is wiser then a woman; it does not bark at its master.' That's when she'd hit him with her fan."

He chuckled. "Sounds like they love each other, being able to tease like that but still consider it un-offensive."

"They do." She was quiet then, thinking about them. She hadn't gotten a letter form them yet, but she hadn't expected one. It would take a while for the letter to travel that distance.

Dom saw her sudden withdrawal from reality and broke into her thought with a question. "Are there any old curses?"

"What…oh, yeah. There's, 'May your left ear wither and fall into your right pocket.'"

Dom chuckled again, drawing her even closer to reality and to himself. She was still at his side with his arm around her, but she didn't want to pull back anymore. Kel grinned at him. "There's worse. 'May the grass grow at your door and the fox build his nest on your hearthstone. May the light fade from your eyes, so you never see what you love. May your own blood rise against you, and the sweetest drink you take be the bitterest cup of sorrow. May you die without benefit of clergy; may there be none to shed a tear at your grave, and may the hearthstone of the dead be your best bed forever.'"

"Hmm…." Dom muttered, tugging at her burnoose so it covered her shoulder only to slip back again. He rubbed circles into her shoulder instead to keep her warm. The touch made Kel warmer then he thought. "Theses Yamani's of yours…they sound like a spiteful bunch."

"Oh, they are." Kel told him, her face serious. "Remember that around Yuki, specially at the wedding. If you ruin the fan dance she may just kill you."

"I've been getting better." He said and leaned closer to her ear again. "She says I'm already better then Nealan. So far I've only cut my arm and foot. He's cut…other places. Less convenient ones."

Kel laughed and turned her face to him. Her laughing stopped instantly. His face was so close to hers that the side of her nose was pressed against his. She let out as shallow breath, feeling him do the same. He had his head ducked slightly bringing his head to hers. It isn't much of an effort, she thought dizzily. He's only two inches taller then me.

Dom was looking strait into her eyes, contemplating what to do next. Reluctantly he disengaged, something telling him it wasn't right. Maybe because the men are around, he thought as he pushed back a chunk of her hair. Kel pulled her face from his hand and Dom let it fall to his side. Why'd she do that? She normally never moved from him when it was such a simple gesture. Did he make her mad, what did he do?

"I'm going to the rest of the Own." Kel muttered and walked away from him. Dom wasn't sure but it looked like she was rushing.

Dom thought over what he had done as they rode back to the fort. Kel was riding in lead with Raoul, quieter then usual. Once she looked back when one of the men said something to her and Dom caught her eyes with his the moment they crossed him, not letting them go no matter what. He stared at her, trying to read her expression before she turned away. What had he done? He couldn't find anything to give him a single clue in her face.

Kel jumped when Raoul said something to her. "What Milord?"

"That young centaur, Ezhno, he's an interesting fellow." Raoul mumbled. "I told them we'd come back soon, and if they need an ally that the fort isn't far away. They feel unrest is coming. I feel it to." He told her of the numbers of immortals the herd had seen in the area.

"So there are giants." Kel breathed. "And wyverns. Why'd they come here? We're still at war, or land isn't safe. Tortall isn't a low populous. Why didn't they go to Galla if they wanted to evade people? Why _here_?" She didn't want dangerous creatures where innocents could be hurt. Kel knew that Galla had less people and right now completely out of a war.

"Galla has too many steep mountains for creatures like tauros, spidrens, and centaurs. Too little food for giants and ogres and too cold for them as well as the wyverns. Tortall has woods plenty for them to hid and hunt in. They wouldn't stand a chance in Galla." Kel only grunted. As much as she disliked it she had to except that fact. "After the celebration, when the fort calms down again, I want us to go visit the herd again. Blackhoof agreed he'd help us try to clear the area of dangerous immortals." Raoul continued. "He wants nothing but for his herd to remain safe. That and he thinks it would be beneficial for Ezhno to interact with humans. He'll be leading a hunt with us some time in the next three weeks."

Kel didn't comment. She wasn't excited to meet the centaur again. "Does the King know?" she asked. "Where else are the immortals heading?"

"Giant Killer had them as well. I'm sure Steadfast and the others do as well. The King knows but there is little Jonathan can do but have us exterminate the rouges and make deals with the others." Raoul said warily. "They're calling it The Plague. We should be able to get it under out belts by the end of the summer."

Kel nodded. This would be a knights even for her. She'd be able to be the combat knight she trained to be as well as be with New Hope. The prospect lightened the weight settling in her stomach. Kel peeked from the corner of her eye to behind her and at the men. Dom was still staring at her, looking completely calm. It seemed almost unnatural how still he sat on his horse's back. His body was completely at rest, but his eyes were hard with thought. If he had his eyes closed anyone could have mistaken him for meditating.

Wolset noticed his sergeant's silence and waved his hand before his face, calling for him to be on the alert. Dom seemed to snap to himself and reeled back from the other mans hand like he had been slapped. Quickly he lost his balance and with a thump hit the ground. Quickly Kel called the company to a halt and dismounted, heading towards the fallen man.

She crouched by his side in the snow and put a hand on his shoulder when he tried to sit up. "You have a gash on you temple." She informed him. "Emmet!" Kel called over the company.

"Yes, Lady Kel?" A male voice said from her side after a few moments. She looked up to see the man next to her, his hands already glowing with his gift. "Can you make sure Sergeant Domitan doesn't die of blood lose on the way back and wont laps into a coma?"

Emmet nodded his head. "Aye." He looked at Dom who's face was flushed and pulled down in a scowl. "At least when Milord falls he keeps himself from injury." He teased. Emmet pressed his fingers to Dom's temple and cool magic rushed through to the other mans body. Dom wiggled at the feeling. He felt painful pressure on the side of his head and Emmet pulled back. "He's got miner head trauma, but it's a concussion never the less. He's dazed right now, but a feather could knock him out till he gets some rest."

"I don't have a concussion," Dom snapped, pushing the other man back. He tried to get to his feet but fell back when a wave of nausea hit him. "Shit," he swore and rubbed the side of his head only to make it ache more.

Kel stepped forward and rested her hand on Emmet's arm. "Thank you, I'll take it from here." She informed him and he stepped back, heading back to his horse. She looked to Wolset. "Take his horse to the back and put him on a lead, please." The man nodded and went to do so.

"I can ride just fine."

Kel looked down at Dom, a smile pulling at the corner of her mouth. "You can't even stand, Dom. I'm not going to let you ride." She crouched by him again and helped him to his feet before slinging his arm over her shoulder and leading him to the front.

"I'm _not_ riding with you," Dom growled. Kel looked at him and saw that his face was completely red, the color leaking down to his neck.

"You will," she told him sternly, shrugging more of his weight on her shoulder so he could walk easier. "I can pull rank if that makes you listen. If that doesn't work I could let you fall over right now and knock you out. I don't think it would be less degrading for you to ride limp on the back of Hoshi."

That quieted him and Kel helped him climb on Hoshi's back. Once he was settled and she was sure wouldn't fall Kel swung herself up into the saddle in front of him. Raoul was grinning at the lethargic sergeant in amusement before calling the company into motion again. Kel held in her laughter as Raoul rattled on, teasing and mocking Dom to spit him for the many times Dom had done it to him. He took it doggedly and rested his head on Kel's back.

The men chuckled seeing that Dom had fallen asleep while leaning on Kel. At the fort they pulled him down so Kel could dismount. He didn't stir. Kel frowned and walked with them as they brought him to the infirmary.

The infirmary still had men from Merric's patrol healing in the beds. The copper tang of blood still hung in the air as bandages were switched for more bandages. Merric himself was still in a cot, eyes closed as he slept. She figured he must have been given something to sleep because as the men loudly walked in he didn't stir. When Dom was laid down on a cot the men were ushered out by tired healers leaving Kel behind alone.

"Second time he's been brought here, pathetic." Kel turned to see Neal walking to them. He looked tired, his eyes framed by purple bruises, but he was grinning. "And he fell from the saddle, that's just rich."

"For you, I'm sure." Kel smiled weakly. "Emmet said he has a weak concussion."

Neal covered his cousin's head with a green glow and nodded before probing the rest of his body. "A cracked rib too, but that's easily fixed. Probably two days rest for the concussion though. His skull is properly bruised, but it doesn't look like he landed on that first. His arm will be bruised and ache for a few days. The cut is nothing but will keep bleeding if not bandaged. Other then that he's perfectly fine."

"Good," Kel said, her smile coming easier then before. Relief flooded her. "He wont miss being in the wedding."

Neal chuckled at his cousin's misfortune and went to get a bandage for the cut on Dom's head. Kel looked down at Dom's latent form. Blood was leaking onto the pillow under his head and already stained the hair that was flopped in his face. Kel pushed it back with her hand and smeared the blood away with her thumb. Bending down she pressed her lips to his forehead before straightening again. Turning she walked hurriedly from the infirmary, not seeing the healer watching her with arched brows holding a roll of bandages.


	9. Chapter 9

Matrimonial Rings

He slept through the night, but when Dom woke the next evening he remembered everything that had taken place. Turning on his side he ignored the pain and buried his face in his pillow. "Damn it," he muttered into the scratchy cloth and gripped the corners harshly, pulling at the fabric in frustration and humiliation. When he heard the seams begin to rip Dom loosened his hold and began muttering profanities. He couldn't have possibly humiliated himself more. Kel had seen him fall, had to take care of him like a small child. She was probably laughing at him still with the other men, remembering his face as it broke out in shock.

Dom turned on his back again and groaned. His back ached along with his right arm. His head throbbed to an uneven rhythm and the ceiling spun in his vision. Dom dug his nails into his palm and closed his eyes. He probably looked like an idiot, sitting motionless and just staring at her before falling from his gelding's back. Dom felt his stomach twist in embarrassment and wondered if he would be sick. He had been doing his best to look completely calm on the ride back, completely at ease and laid back. Internally he was spazzing, reading Kel's every movement and trying to decipher what they all meant. Dom had always thought women were strange in a way. All their decisions seemed unpredictable and random, every move made a second after thought. Dom knew women were confusing, but worrier women were far more perplexing then the average court lady. Each choice still seemed chosen at random, but somehow always intelligent and correct like they were born with the skill. Their movements were haphazard but still deadly accurate and sure, intimidating in every aspect. Being around them Dom felt that any moment one would decide to jump him, hold him down and press a sword to his throat. Kel wouldn't do that, it was against her nature, but she was still a woman.

Dom didn't understand women.

A gentle purr filled his ear and Dom turned his head. Domitan was rested on the corner of his bed, long erect tail waving in content. Uncurling his fingers Dom let the kitten nuzzle into them and scratched him on the chest. He let his eyes drift shut as the cat lulled him into a light rest. His mind wondered to different places, different times, before a jolt of realization shot through him. If Domitan was here, that meant Kel was not far away.

When Dom's eyes snapped open he struggled to sit up causing pain to shoot through his back. Collapsing back on the cot panting in pain he stared at the ceiling. There was no reason to make himself look even more foolish then he already had so Dom just laid still. He took Kel's example and worked himself into a tranquil state, letting himself melt into better thoughts. When he was better Dom sat up and rested against the wall behind him. Domitan crawled into his lap and thrust his head into the man's palm, demanding attention. Dom petted him as he scanned the room.

He hadn't noticed how many men had taken hurt from the patrol. It made him a bit shameful as he examined the injury's they had sustained and known he hadn't noticed. Men were wrapped in heavy bandages to help clot up deep wounds. Healers bustled back and forth with wash bins and cloths to clean wounds. Then he saw her. Kel was seated in a wooden chair next to a cot were a redheaded man laid. Dom noticed him as Merric of Hollyrose, the knight under her command. The conversation came to his ears and he closed his eyes again, listening.

"So we know there are satyrs out there." Kel muttered in thought. "The centaurs hadn't mentioned them, though I'm sure a small group of satyrses wouldn't take on a full centaur herd."

"Not that they're shy creatures." The young man's voice was curdled with exhaustion. Dom frowned. What exactly had happened during the patrol? "They followed us in the trees, keeping out of sight, and knocked several of my men out of their saddles with slings for their amusement."

"Are you sure they are satyrs?" Kel asked.

There was a pause and Dom was sure the man was nodding. "They were the goat-men. They looked like men, but had the hooves and legs as well as the tails of goats. They all had horns in their head too. A group of five of them followed the patrol after the spidrens attacked us. Thought us good entertainment."

"Do you think they'll be a problem?"

Another pause. "No," Merric finally answered. "They'll just be chasing the nymphs around and playing tricks." He made a snorting sound. "Gah! This doesn't sound right; I don't even believe what I'm saying it's so ridiculous!"

Neither of them spoke for a long time. Sounds of men and healers filled Dom's ears and he thought the conversation was over when Kel's voice rose again. "Alanna made contact with the King late last night."

"What's the news?"

"Wirms in the water at Pirates Swoop, phoenix sightings all over the realm, and even an Ice Drake killed in Tirrsmont. They all can't possibly be coming from Scanra, and the mages at the university are looking into possible spells to bring them here, _again_. More and more creatures we have never even seen are showing up and there might be more to come."

"No mage would be stupid enough to open the realms again." Merric muttered in thought.

"No, I don't think anyone opened it." Kel grunted. "Most of them even Daine doesn't know; neither does Numair or the King for that matter."

"Kel," Merric's voice was disbelieving and shaken. Dom was shocked at the tone. "I hope you're not thinking that someone has _made_ them."

There was silence followed by a creak. Opening his eyes Dom saw that Kel had stood, a healer rushing to take away her chair. Sternly she instructed the man to lie back down, seemingly dropping the conversation. When Merric protested she silenced him with a look and he laid still. "I've burdened your mind far too much as it is. Thank you for the report Merric, I want your written one the day after you are allowed out. When there's more information I'll be sure you hear it." She flagged down a healer who rushed over with a cup in hand. Warily Merric took it and drank. No more then a minute later he was asleep on the cot, mug still in hand.

When Kel turned around she spotted Dom sitting up in bed with Domitan in his lap. Dom was shocked to see her smile at him and walk over. Usually angry people didn't smile, or was she remembering the other day? "How are you doing?" She asked, sitting on the edge of his bed.

"Fine," Dom managed to get out, still seemingly calm.

He fidgeted when Kel reached out and rested her hand on his chest, indicating for his to turn so she could see his arm. He gritted his teeth realizing that he had been stripped of his shirt and turned for her. He heard her snort as she looked at his right arm that still ached. "Bruised was an understatement." She muttered. Dom turned his body to get a look at it. A nasty deep purple and black mess covered his bicep down to his elbow. He flinched when Kel just lightly ran her finger over his skin, not even pressing down.

Kel pulled back and shook her head. Getting off the bed she went to the other side and knelt down. When she came back up she held the jar of balm he had put on her. Perching on the corner of the bed again she began to rub it into his skin without him asking of it. Dom winced, but she was being gentle as she touched the bruise. "It'll be a nice green by tomorrow." She told him when she finished. "Anymore?" Dom shook his head, though he was sure there was some on his back, and Kel capped the jar. Dom still didn't speak till she lifted her hand and lightly touched the bandage around his head. "Might want this changed too. Neal didn't want to waist good magic on a cut, but it was still bleeding and Emmet didn't bother with it either. I'll get a healer."

She stood and turned, but Dom reached out and gripped her wrist. "Can't you just do it?" he asked. "I know Neal has taught you how to make a proper bandage and you did it before in the Own."

He saw her hesitate. "You want me to re-bandage you?" she asked to clarify.

Dom shrugged. "You're better then some stuffy healer." He saw her still hesitate and met her eyes. They were more green then anything that day with a light halo of gold around her pupils. Her thick lashes brushed her cheek as she blinked at his silence. He still hadn't released her and she was waiting for what else he had to say. "Please," his voice cracked and he inwardly scowled. He saw Kel's face soften and a frown pull at her lips before she nodded and turned form his grip, heading to get some more bandages. Why had she frowned? Was she still mad at him?

When she came back Dom slipped. "Are you upset with me?" he blurted. When she looked at him quizzically he recoiled. "Never mind. I didn't mean that."

Kel shook her head and sat down next to him again. She spoke quietly as she unwrapped his head. "No, I'm not mad. I just have a problem saying no to people who say please." She gave a half smile at that remark, probably remembering something.

Dom mustered up all his courage. "You were mad before."

"No I wasn't." She said off hand, tossing his old bandage aside. Dom was watching her face and didn't see the amount of blood the cloth had collected. Kel smoothed out the fresh bandage and moved to put it on him. Dom stopped her with a hand on her wrist. "You're going to start bleeding again." She moved to place the bandage over the cut again but he stopped her. "Dom-"

"Why'd you pull away from me?" he asked.

Kel looked at him in confusion. "What?" There was no trace of dishonesty in her voice or face. She really didn't know what he was talking about.

"Oh," he paused. "Well, um…." Gods, he couldn't have made himself seem any more stupid. "I just pushed back a piece of your hair and you pulled back was all. I thought you were angry with me."

Kel let out a soft laugh and even though she was laughing at him Dom felt relieved. "I was never mad at you Dom." She assured him, taking his hand from her wrist. "Now sit still."

Dom closed his eyes as Kel gently rewrapped his head. Her fingers were tactful as they danced across his brow, not putting too much pressure that would cause him any strain. "Was it because I made you uncomfortable?" Dom asked as he lifted his head again for her. She stopped in her motion for a second before continuing. "I'll stop if it upsets you. I don't mean to make you feel ill at ease around me-"

"It's fine Dom." She interrupted him. "I don't feel awkward around you." It wasn't a lie. Truthfully she acknowledged his behavior now almost like second nature. She was becoming far too used to his attention. She tied the bandage off and sat back, looking at her work before meeting his eyes. "Really, I don't."

Dom stared back at her for a long moment before nodding. Abruptly and with a little pain he grabbed her head and pulled her to him, kissing her on the tip of the nose before leading his lips down to her own. His mouth was pressed to hers, but neither of them made the initiative move. Dom smiled against her lips, his hand fisted in her hair to keep her in place. "Do you think they'd let me out now that I'm awake?" he asked calmly.

Dom released his grip on her hair, letting the fine threads sift through his fingers as she pulled back. Quickly she racked her fingers through her hair to make it settle some, looking around to see who saw. Healers continued to bustle by and men laid back on their beds. No one seemed to have seen the scene. Her eyes continued to roam till she saw the Neal's office door was opened a crack. Green fabric quickly moved out of view. "Neal said you needed two days of rest for the concussion. Otherwise you're fine."

"I don't need-"

"Just till tomorrow morning." Kel interrupted him, taking her eyes away from the office to give him a stern look. "You need another nights rest here before going back to work. If I hear you leave this bed-"

"He wont." Kel turned to see Neal standing next to her, his shirt the same green she had seen through his office door. She looked up at him with raised brows. "The messengers about to leave." He told her. "If you want to send out any letters do it now."

Kel nodded and stood. Giving Dom one more look she trotted off to get her letters. Neal looked at his cousin and tugged at the sheet, straightening out the wrinkles Kel had caused. "You seem better." He mumbled.

Dom looked at him suspiciously. "Yes. Kel helped with my bruises so that's a pain gone. Well, mostly." He amended.

Neal looked at his cousin's arm. "Ah, her bruise balm. Pricey stuff."

Dom froze. "What?" She shouldn't have wasted it on him.

Neal shook his head, knowing the other man's thoughts. "Alanna made it for her when she was a page. Gave her a bunch of stuff since she couldn't be there." He seemed flustered for a moment. "Dom…."

"Yes, Sir Meathead?"

Neal scowled at the name before his face grew harder. "I saw you just now."

"I see you too. Is there a point to this?"

"I saw you with _Kel_." Neal said through gritted teeth. He watched as his cousin stiffened. "You two seemed awfully comfortable together."

"We haven't been friends as long as you have, but still I've known her for long enough." Dom said, playing stupid. His stomach tightened when he saw Neal grin without humor. His cousin knew, what he knew exactly Dom wasn't sure, but still Neal knew something he wasn't sure he wanted him to know.

"I saw you kiss her."

"On the nose."

"And hold her to your mouth." Neal added and Dom had nothing to say. "Now," he said, studying his nails seemingly composed. There was a crease in his forehead that gave away him frustration. "I'm not going to forbid you from pursuing her in any courtship," he said in his usual drawl. It didn't make Dom any less tense. "Kel is a grown woman and can take or leave you without my input, but," he looked up at him, "that doesn't mean I don't have any. You make one mistake, disrespect her in any way; I'll make sure your chances drop down to zero. Oh, but it won't just be me. You've seen how my lovely Blossom handles her fan, and how the other knights wield their swords. Kel has friends Dom, lots and lots of them. In the Own, in the castle, all over the realm. You hurt her, they'll hurt you and blood kin or no I will join them. Kel is as good as a sister to me and I would gladly do you bodily harm if you offend her."

"Thanks for the warning." Dom said through his teeth. "But I don't-"

"I'm not looking for a confession Dom." Neal interrupted; his face and voice softer. Dom wouldn't look at him. "Pursue her as you wish. I'm just telling you that we wont stand for you toying with our Protector."

He turned and left before he could hear Dom's muttered, "I understand."

Work at the fort was mildly peaceful to Kel's distaste. There were little immortal sightings from the walls and another patrol wasn't to leave till orders from Lord Wyldon arrived. Nightmares came and went and Kel would wake panting. They would stick with her for only so long till Dom noticed her anxiety. He would throw his attention into making for forget and laugh. Kel would be lying if she said she didn't like it.

The day the wedding took place there was little she could do to avoid the preparations. A patch of area in the center of the camp was shoveled and decorated for the wedding. Kel was amazed how well it turned out. Yuki really could decorate an area. The entire scene looked frozen. The area was decorated with pale blue silks and cream benches. Everything was trimmed with silver and lined with blue. Yuki was very proud, within reason. The final project was gorgeous. Very contradicting to the fire of their costume.

Kel was scowling as she adjusted her cream obi. The whole fort was coming to watch the ceremony. They all wanted to look at the Yamani finery and gawk at the attire. The after party was open to them as well and promised to be very entertaining. And they all get to see me like _this_, she thought, looking at her reflection. The kimono was beautiful. The first layer was a dark scarlet that only showed an inch at the hem and sleeves. Over that was a plain cream robe. The final robe, she noted, matched Dom's tunic. It was gold with cream embroidered flames. She turned looking at herself. The kimono glittered and shimmered with her every move. The dress was beautiful, but Kel felt too…female. As silly as it sounded she didn't want her refugees seeing her as a woman. She wanted them to see her as she had been seen at the palace, a worrier and sexless. Her face was painted and her lips red. Her hair was pulled back in a bun with two strands left out to carve her face. She looked like a woman; there was no way around it.

"At least I'm letting you have weapons." Yuki muttered as she slid another pin into her hair. The tip of it was sharpened to a point, used for throwing at an enemy. "It's not like I'm leaving you disarmed."

"You're only doing that because if we suddenly were attacked I wouldn't be able to take command." Kel pointed out. "You won't even let me have a sword."

"You shouldn't be complaining." Buri spoke from the door. "I saw how many of those little Yamani toys you hid in that sash. You could take on the whole Kings Guard with that." She turned to Yuki. "Come on. You can't be late for your own wedding."

When Kel took Dom's arm to go down the aisle she felt his eyes on her face and looked to him. He was grinning like an idiot. She wanted to tell him to shut up, but he wasn't saying anything. She wanted to ask him what was so funny, but that was painfully obvious. Instead she settled on something even more childish and stuck her tongue out at him before walking down the aisle, past the rows and rows of refugees and visiting knights. Some she recognized as her year mates and smiled to them. They looked at her shocked. Kel could see in plain in their eyes. That made her smile falter.

Neal had the same face on throughout the ceremony and into the after party. "I thought the groom was supposed to be overly nervous." Dom muttered to Kel at the dinner. Kel had finally found out what Yuki had been doing with all her spare time at the fort. She had been in the kitchen teaching the cooks Yamani recopies and preparing the food for the dinner and party. Dishes from Tortall and The Yamani islands were splayed about the rearranged mess hall. The tables were pushed back to the walls and people either stood while they ate or sat. All but for the people who had been a part of the ceremony. The groom's men ad bride's maids sat at the front of the room with the bride and groom.

Kel turned to Dom who sat at her side. "Neal's been waiting for this day since he met Yuki. I wouldn't expect anything less." She looked at Neal's large grin. "Though, he could tone it down a little."

Dom chuckled and Kel looked to him again. As much as he denied it, he looked good in his gold tunic. Shinny, but good. He popped a chunk of meat in his mouth and Kel noticed he only had Tortallan food on his plate. When she asked him about it he made a face. "Are you kidding me? I had Island food at the palace." He shuddered, causing Kel to smile. "Either had raw fish or a pound of salt. You people like your rice too."

"I know what you mean. When we first were new in Yamani it seemed everything was made of fish. It just depends where you go for food." She turned to her pate and picked up a roll covered in a sticky syrup. "Here," she held it out to him. Kel sighed when he didn't move to take it. "No fish or salt, promise. It wouldn't kill you to try something new."

Dom hesitated for another second before grinning. Leaning forward he bit into the roll, lips moving against Kel's fingers and making her skin tingle. She almost screeched and dropped the roll, but recovered and scowled at him when he pulled back. "You're right. I didn't taste fish at all." He said smugly, obviously not talking about the food. "What is that thing called, it's really sweat." He motioned to the rest of the roll.

Kel tossed it on his plate and Dom ate the rest of it eagerly. "I knew you'd like it." She said and studied the room. Everyone was talking and laughing. The amount of wine that was saved up in the kitchen was being drank eagerly and it was obviously plain some wouldn't be awake at the usual hour. At their table Yuki and Neal were seated next to Dom and took every chance they got to move closer and kiss. Kel felt sick seeing their sugar coated cuteness and looked away. Alanna was talking with Merric in a heated discussion Kel couldn't hear, but both red heads looked determined to win for their cause. Faleron and Buri seemed to only share an occasional word as they ate.

When she turned her attention back to Dom she saw him eyeing her plate. She grinned. "Curious?" she asked.

"I must say I am." Dom murmured and licked his fingers, sticky from the roll. "That was better then I thought."

After Dom sampled every idem on Kel's plate, giving his critics on each, he presented Kel with a quarter of a turnover. "No," Kel said when he moved it closer to her. "I've already had Tortallan food. This was just your learning experience." He pouted. "You look ridiculous when you do that." She informed him.

"Ridiculously cute you mean," he corrected her, not moving the food. "Come on, you have no Tortallan food on your plate and now it's my turn to feed you. Has to be fair." He waved the turnover in front of her. "It's good." He grinned, like it was a joke only he understood.

Kel sighed and leaned forward. She did her best to not touch his fingers, but it was a useless attempt and she felt breathless when she pulled back. The turn over was filled with sausage and cheese, surprisingly familiar. Then she understood why he smiled at the words, 'it's good'. "You gave me one of these before." She tried to remember when, running through her memory. It wasn't like he had only given her food once. There were so many chances over the years. Even the first day she met him he had given her food. That was the reminder she needed. "When we were called out to Haresfeild, my first day with the Own."

Dom nodded and snatched another piece of food from her plate. Kel was able to see the red coloring before he closed it in his mouth and hid a smile in her hand. "What?" he asked, seeing her eyes laugh. His cheeks suddenly flushed with the heat of the food and he opened his mouth, trying to let the cool air sooth his throat. A laugh bubbled up from Kel's throat. Dom's eyes began to water and he grabbed his goblet of wine. Kel stopped him before he could bring it to his mouth. "I'm positive that's Yamani," she said, noting the sweeter tang coming from the cup. "They don't water down their wines like they do in Tortall. Here," she offered him the white rice on her plate. "This and bread helps more anyways."

After finishing her rice Dom ate two slices of bread and had a few concentrated sips of wine. When Yuki saw him she giggled. "You know, it's the groom and bride who are supposed to feed one another." She teased and Dom glared at her, taking another bite of bread.

The tables were moved out of the room when the meal was over and conversation grew louder as people broke into groups. Children ran underfoot and Kel found that she attracted a lot of them. The little girls stared at her and the other women's kimonos in awe of the colors and little boys tugged on the fabric, trying to figure out how they stayed together. Kel spoke with them for a while till Yuki pulled her aside and back to her room.

Quickly Yuki instructed Kel to change into a pair of dress leggings much like Dom's and a wrap around jacket that was secured into place with another obi that was smaller then her cream one. Kel moved around in the outfit. It wasn't as comfortable as her breeches and tunic, but it was an upgrade from the kimono. Yuki had Lalasa design all the kimonos so they were mobile, but that did nothing to the heat the layers of silk caused.

Yuki pressed Kel's fan into her hand and rushed her back out, whispering encouraging words. "It's not me I'm worried about." Kel whispered to the Yamani as they walked back into the mess. "I know I can throw a _shukusen_. It's Dom I'm worried about."

Yuki continued to lead her till Kel reached a gap in the crowd. "He knows more then you think," Yuki whispered before disappearing. Kel stepped forward and saw Dom standing in the center of the gap, open fan in his right hand. It glittered the same gold both of them were dressed in. Kel opened hers. It was the same.

People moved further back when they noticed something was happening. Dom grinned seeing her and threw the fan above his head, letting it cartwheel a few times before he caught it. He didn't even look up as he did it, the task seemingly effortless. He has be practicing, Kel noted as she mimicked the move and added an extra twist to her throw, making the fan spinal before she grasped the base. Dom raised his brows and grinned self-assuredly at her as he copied her throw.

The crowd grew fascinated as they began speeding up the tosses. Their moves became more advanced and they leapt for the fans rather then waiting for them to come down. Suddenly Dom spun around before his body went ridged, completely straight as it faced her. His fan glittered in the light as it flew to her.

Quickly Kel spun and threw her fan to him, catching his and throwing it back as she caught her own. They repeated the throwing, slowly raising the fans as they did and opening them. They spiraled in the air and flipped, but both of them caught the base of the _shukusen_. Both of them began to circle, staying directly across form the other, but their path grew shorter as they drew closer together. As they got closer the throws were sharper, more violent, and Kel was afraid that they would have to stop. But Dom never had a problem with catching the fan and throwing it right back at her which shocked her before she bubbled with pride for him.

The fans rose higher and higher before they curved back into Kel and Dom's hands. There was nearly two feet between both of them and they kept moving. The audience was shocked at how they moved; each step and flick of the wrist deadly graceful. It looked as if the two would coil together the way they were getting so close as they twined around the other. The fans whorled in the air and each time they caught them they went up again. Kel didn't notice that Dom had put a curl in his toss. She saw him catch his fan in one of his hands and hers in the other.

Kel stood baffled and Dom took the moment to his advantage. Tossing the fans up again Dom moved forward, pressing himself to her. Eating up the shock in her eyes he slipped his hand under her thigh and pulled her leg up in a fast movement, hooking it around his hips. Sliding his leg forward he kept it under Kel's so she couldn't pull back. With ease he caught the fans as they came back down and snapped them shut, the noise echoing through the silent mess hall. He presented them both to Kel's throat with a grin.

Peals of applause broke form the back of the crowd and flowed to the front quickly once they lost their shock. People whistled and Dom lowered the fans from Kel's neck. Grabbing her hand and lowering her leg he mouthed the word 'bow' to her before turning to do so. Kel quickly followed suit and ducked her head to the refugees.

Dom offered her fan and she took it, tucking it in her obi. "Dom…," Kel looked at him with appreciation. "That was…you were," she struggled; something Kel wasn't used to, "amazing!"

"He should be," Dom's smile grew when Yuki and Neal came over to them. Yuki hugged both of them, thanking them for doing the performance for them. Neal hugged Kel and clapped Dom on the back, grinning. Yuki turned to Kel and jerked her head to Dom. "I just let Alanna and Buri show him the dance so I could finish the preparations. When they dubbed him worthy the Sergeant wasn't satisfied and came trudging after me." She gave him a look. "Wouldn't leave me alone till I'd show him a few things."

"You didn't mind." Dom told her surely. "You said I was an excellent student."

Dom winced when she hit his shoulder with her fan. "And I gave you strict choreography, too. Which you didn't follow."

Yuki had to stop hitting Dom on account of the people coming over to the group; otherwise Kel was sure she would have kept hounding the man. Someone pulled out a violin and Kel found herself pulled into some sort of folk dance she had never done before. Three refugee girls were around her smiling and giggling. Kel recognized the four men were from the Own. Blonde Osbern took her as his partner and the four couples positioned themselves in a square. "What's going on?" Kel asked Osbern in a whisper. He just smiled roguishly at her.

The beat to the song was fast and the couples began moving quickly counter clockwise. When people began making calls Kel looked about confused. Osbern twirled her quickly to another man who embraced her after spinning away his own partner. He grinned and spun her to another man after they changed their position in the square. Now the square turned into two lines facing each other. The couples at the end switched positions and took up the spot the other one across from them had vacated. The two in the middle of the line traded places with the person next to them. Kel was confused as they began backing up and followed them till they were in a circle.

Following suit Kel faced her back to the person next to her. Promptly she was yanked to another spot in the circle and twirled in another set of arms. Her face was hot from the movement and she saw Neal cup his hands around his mouth as he made a call. The circle moved and Kel found herself with another partner at the lead.

The violin picked up pace and Kel felt her hair loosen from the sticks Yuki had placed in it to keep it together. More and more people were making calls she didn't know like 'counteract' and 'cover up'. The pairings changes by the second and Kel was always a second behind. Several of the refugees laughed at her expense. Let them, she told herself as she was tugged to a soldier named Alair. He spun her to Wolset who chuckled at her pink cheeks.

After following a call named 'create a column' and another called 'clear the way' Kel found herself back in Osbern's arms. His cheeks were flushed like hers and his hair damp with sweat. He was panting, but his face was lit with a grin. Kel looked dizzy as the music stopped.

"I need to sit down," she told him and stumbled off to her chair. Other dancers filtered onto the floor in pairs and appeared in Kel's vision as colorful blurs. When Kel got back to her seat she ducked her head between her legs and began to breathe in and out deeply, trying to bring air to her overly used lungs.

A few moments with her head bowed she felt a stir in the stale winter air, heard a tap at her side over the fiddle and laughter. Her head shot up and she saw two figures before her, both alien and familiar at the same time. No matter how big they grew, no matter how old they got, Kel would always see the two boys as slender youths in their page uniforms speckled with bruises. When she stood again she was wrapped in a quick hug by Seaver before he stepped back again, looking slightly sheepish.

Faleron, who stood at the other mans side, gave Kel a gentle smile. He was about to open his mouth to say something when Seaver interrupted him. "They've pulled me from Galla's border for a few weeks now." He informed her quickly. "I've been bouncing back and forth between needed forts. Last I was stationed with Wyldon." He tugged a letter from under his tunic, and Kel noticed it was soggy as well as his hair. He must have just arrived. He held the letter out to Kel. "He sent this, and also informed me that if you will send out patrols in this mess again, he wants you to use every advantage you have."

Kel inwardly slumped. _Every advantage_. Faleron looked at her knowingly, but it was clear, behind his guarded dark eyes, that he opposed the idea. He hadn't been there the day they had met with the centaurs, and he still wasn't convinced of their use to them and their neutral stance. Kel shook her head. It didn't matter. At the very moment it seemed the centaurs were their only advantage, and what was a better way of understanding what had driven the immortals to Tortall better them the immortals themselves?


	10. Chapter 10

Her Answer

After Kel finished telling Seaver of the events the news seemed to make him almost giddy, his dark eyes dancing with eagerness. He asked question on question about the centaurs and what Merric had seen. When Kel drew the information to the end Seaver jumped to his feet, a much different man then the quiet page she remembered him as. A new song had started on the violin and couples were twirling on the floor. "Dance with me," he called out and grabbed her hand, trying to yank her to her feet.

Kel wrinkled her nose jokingly. "You're all soggy." She complained when he tugged her back to the open gap on the floor.

"And you're sweaty." He retorted and pulled her into the dance.

Dom's fingers tightened around his goblet. Kel was very popular on the dance floor that night. After her knight friends danced with her for a few dances the Own began pulling her away, every man wanting his share. After the Own refugee youths approached her and offered her their hand, smiling shyly as she accepted their offer.

Dom didn't move to even bother asking for a dance. He would only be able to hold her for so long before another man came along and Dom wasn't sure he'd graciously give her away. Instead he stayed back and watched as she was pasted form man to man, her cheeks growing hotter and hotter. He outlined the rim of his cup with his finger as a refugee not much younger then himself spun Kel causing her to laugh. At least there hadn't been any slower songs yet. All of them had a speedy tempo and some even preformed in a group of people instead of single pairs. He wasn't sure what he would do if one of those wary eyed youths wrapped their arms around Kel's waist. He was positive it was nothing encouraging.

His face broke out in a grin when Kel was pulled into another choreographed dance. Dom watched them as they moved and had to admit the dances seemed far more entertaining then any of the dances at the Mid Winter parties. The dance was foreign to him, with a repeated sequence of steps in which a group of people danced in two lines. The dance was without regard of gender of the individuals and Kel was occasionally dancing next to another woman. It was fascinating to watch as the two lines faced each other, executing the steps at the same time. The foot movements were simple and Kel caught on faster then she had in the last group dance. Dom grinned to himself. At least this dance had no real physical contact.

Dom listened to the people around him as they watched and talked over the dance. Soon he began recognizing the steps as they were preformed, the refugees naming them off as the dance proceeded. Setting his goblet down, Dom merged into one of the lines, slowly nudging his way into a spot across from Kel. She grinned when she noticed him.

The group moved as one again and Dom followed them as they stepped a chasse: one foot moved to the side, the other foot is placed next to it, and the first foot moves again to the side. The lines turned so their backs were to the person across from them and they all raised their hands above their heads, clapping them together. Turning back around, they clapped down by their knees. Every one was grinning and laughing as they moved.

There were a few more moves before the violin stopped. One foot moves to the side, the other moves behind it, the first foot moves again to the side, and the second scuffs next to the first. Three steps being taken in only two beats of music moving to the right. They finished with a triple step forwards, starting on the right foot, with the second foot slid up to and tightly locked behind the first foot before the first foot is moved a second time in the same direction as for the first step. The stomping of feet filled the hall along with happy cheers. Laughter rose over the violin as it rang out in its final note and the two lines grew closer to one another in their final step.

Kel stood before Dom, smiling and panting, her mask seemingly lost forever. Her once perfectally made hair was loose with a few more strands of hair hanging in her face. Dom felt a bead of sweat run down his face. It tickled his hot and overlysensitized skin.

Kel reached out her hand and brushed back the salty water, her hand resting on his freshly shaven cheek. Dom's knees weakened to the state of liquid they had never been before. His lids grew heavy and he fought them from dropping into a half lidded state. He was her puppet at the moment, she was tugging his strings and he was at her comand. Her long fingers stroked him in a light, almost endearing matter. Dom's neck began to cramp and he ducked his head, butting it against her palm like a dog wanting to be pet. A groan grew in his throat when her hand was snatched back.

Opening his eyes to their fullest Dom watched as Kel was towed out of the room by Yuki's small frame. He grinned, straightening, seeing that Kel's eyes were still on him before she was pulled completely from the room.

Kel protested violently as Yukimi pulled the wrap haori, her hip length kimono jacket, from her body and insisted she wear the dress kimono. "You messed up your hair too!" Yuki exclaimed and tugged the gold plated brass fluttering bira bira kanzashi from Kel's hair. Kel yelped when it took a couple of strands with it. "I'm going to have to redo it."

Seaver and Merric snickered at her when Kel walked back into the hall after Yuki let her go. Her face went into its mask and she punched them both on the shoulder. Hard.

"You look very…," Faleron looked for the right words, his eyes drifting to the naked air to try and find them. "Um…."

"Girly!" Seaver said. He reached out and poked her red lip, pulling his hand back before Kel could hit him. He looked at his finger like he expected the lip stain Yuki had forced on her to rub off on him. Merric lightly touched the bira bira, afraid that if he put too much pressure on the touch the bead flowers and sculpted petals would fall off. He yanked his hand back like the thin brass cut into his skin.

"It looks like a water fall of flower petals are coming out of your hair." Seaver informed her, and this time Kel really got to slap his hand when he reached out and ran his finger over her freshly sculpted bun. He cradled his stinging hand to his chest. "It looks so…_pretty_." He eyed the brass beads at the tips of the long petal vine.

"They're right." Kel's heart throbbed at the sound of the voice behind her. Dom circled around the chair she had sat down in and looked her over with a favorable look in his eyes. "You look like a porcelain doll." He held up his hands defensively when she opened her mouth. "I never said you were one; just that you look it."

Even her annoyance couldn't curb her longing when she looked into his glittering eyes. Kel remembered the feeling of his blistering warm skin under her fingertips and her heart quickened. She dug her nails into her palm, creating small moon crescents. It was all she could do not to reach out and touch him.

The mood in the mess changed again as the violin slowed and softened. Kel knew what was coming, but she still stiffened when Dom offered her his hand. "I'm no good at dancing," she informed him. The pout that seemed to be becoming Dom's new bad habit worked its way onto his face as he looked at her, hand still held out. Kel shook her head, flustered. "Really Dom. I'm no good at dancing."

"You just were dancing Kel." H reminded her. "And you can't tell me they didn't teach you dancing at the palace." His eyes were glittering mischievously, showing his inner nature. Seaver, Merric, and Faleron were looking at him with raised brows before grinning to Kel. She didn't even take notice of them. She was focused on the man in front of her.

Kel had to laugh. "Yeah, I learned to _lead_ like the rest of the boys. I can't do it any other way, and what I did with the refugees is a completely different kind of dance. I just went where they pulled me and moved with them."

She looked up at his face. He was grinning. Taking her hand he yanked her to her feet and Kel collided with his chest. Dom wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her to him, and took a few steps back so they were in the space made by dancing couples. He silenced her protests with a finger to her lips, softer then butterfly wings at it stroked her mouth. Kel was quiet instantly. "Just follow my lead, alright? It's easy." He took her hand and positioned it on his shoulder when she didn't move to do so herself and took her other hand in his. "Ready?" he asked, smiling brightly.

For a while Kel did nothing but focus on her feet, but after a while the rhythm was the only thing she needed to guide her steps. Dom was right, it was easy. She looked up, and being this close to him she saw all the reasons she initially was attracted to Dom. A rush rocked through her body and her hand on his shoulder tightened without her telling it to. His hand engulfed hers, his smile was inviting and bold, and his eyes a bright, brilliant blue set under dark arched brows. His broad shoulders pressed against the fabric of his tunic, filling it out completely. Standing at about six one he was a man grown into his body and comfortable with it.

Dom looked behind him, looking through the people around them. He turned back to her looking amused and curious "What are you grinning at?" Dom asked. Kel wanted to hide her face, but that was impossible. The only way she could do that was burry her face in his tunic front. She laughed softly, and a tad bit nervously, at herself for being caught looking at him. Kel wasn't sure if it was the environment or something else, but she felt safe where she was. She felt capable of being open.

"You," she answered truthfully.

Dom raised his brows. "Really?" he seemed content with that. It was silent for a moment before he spoke again. "So you still get the nightmares." It was a statement, not a question and Kel nodded.

"I think I may have an un-diagnosable mental illness." She muttered in a half hearted joke.

Dom pursed his lips. "And have you thought over my offer?" Kel didn't respond instantly with 'no' like he expected. "Kel?"

"Yes, I have." She answered truthfully again, looking away form him. His offer had been the thought plaguing her for the past week and a half. It seemed like he was her last thought before drifting into nightmares that when she woke up she would wonder if he really could make them go away. She looked back to his face. He seemed shocked.

"And?" he prompted.

Kel bit her lip. Think Kel: is it really worth it? She thought silently. If it works, definitely. She answered herself. Could I or anyone else be harmed if I do this…? No, I don't plan to let anyone but Dom know. She looked up at Dom, searching his eyes. They were soft, patient as he waited for her reply. How will I feel after I've done this? Kel couldn't answer that, because she had never done anything like this before. It wouldn't kill you to try something new, she repeated herself from earlier in sour humor.

Kel buried her face in his shoulder, the only answer he needed. Dom rubbed her arm, muttering comforting words in her ear. Kel just nodded. She couldn't bring herself to speak; her throat had closed on her. That was fine. She had nothing to say. She couldn't think of anything to say. Longing had won out. Years of pining and yearning had crushed her will. Raw hunger washed over her and made her ache. Every craving, every desire, every wish made her body scream with a new heat. Kel's heart clenched, her pulse hammered. "Yes." She managed to croak.

She could have sworn Dom's hands were shaking. "Are you sure?" he whispered. His voice sounded sore and almost painful.

Kel's fingers tightened their grip. She wanted to hold him to her and sing her answer against his lips, but the best she could do was nod vigorously. "Yes, yes, yes, yes," she rambled in a heated whisper. She felt like an idiot, her knees giving up on her and her eyes closing themselves to his warmth. How many times had Dom touched her? Over the years she had lost count, but certainly she hadn't always responded like _this_. She was leaning on him, her body pressed into his. He was still clutching the hand he held while his hand from her waist had slipped down to the low of her back were her spine met her pelvis. It felt like bubbles were running through Kel's blood steam and her arms slacked from the sensation.

Dom couldn't get as good of a grip on her as he wanted, his muscles were too weak from shock and pure joy and self loathing that ran through him. His heart was beating wildly in his chest and they both had stopped dancing. Kel was still leaning into him, and Dom was concerned more over her hearing his rapid heart beat rather then some one seeing them immobile as they were, tangled in each others arms. Reluctantly Dom pulled her back and held her away from him, gripping her shoulders. He tried a calm smile. "Meet me outside in thirty minutes?" he asked.

Kel nodded again and Dom squeezed her arms not sure if he should leave her alone to dwell on her decision or if he should convince her to choose otherwise. Reluctantly he let his hands drop. Dom let his eyes linger on Kel's face before turning and joining in with a group of the Own. Adrenalin rocketed through him as he remembered that face. Cheeks flushed through the face paint, eyes large and unguarded. He remembered how his fingers itched against the slick silk of her kimono as her mouth parted slightly, her lips loosening from all tension.

He hung around the edge of the group of men, not listening to the conversation. He felt like nothing more then a young, green virgin. Dom looked down at his hands that were trembling at the aspect of touching Kel. It was ridiculous. He was a grown man. He had fought in wars and smaller battles for years. He wasn't even a virgin! He hadn't been for years, but he still shook. He had held Kel once or twice before just like he had a minute before, yet blood had pumped through his body faster then necessary. It wasn't that he was frightened. Dom was just unsure. In this was he doing Kel wrong, was he doing himself wrong? Heat rushed through him and he was excited and animated while at the same time he was uncertain and nervous. Never in his entire life had he been so doubtful of a decision, but here he was, practically ripping his hair out of his head over it.

His eyes flicked around the room and he saw Kel standing with the Lioness. A hand slid over his shoulder. "She's trying to set her up with her son." Neal's voice was amused. Dom wanted to hit him. "Makes sense, he's…what? Nineteen now? That's right; he was only a year younger then her age wise. Studied as a mage while his brother went to the palace when we were in our fourth year." He let out a low whistle, admiring. "I heard he's really good now, Thom, I mean. Aly and Alan are nice kids and all. Aly's a tricky little thing and Alan throws himself into his fighting, but Thom's more…I don't know. He's more mature then the other two. I remember as a squire sometimes it was him giving me lectures at Alanna's side when she wasn't going off at me. Being the Lioness's first born put more responsibility on him, kind of like how being the first official female page put responsibility on Kel. He was more settled then the other two as well, his mind wasn't all jumpy like normal kids. I saw him use his magic a few times, and Mithros, it was like watching Numair without wanting to claw his eyes out. For the two days that I had met the kid while he was on a break from his studies he showed me things with healing even Alanna didn't know! This kid, give or take five years younger then me, showed me how to practically put a severed arm back onto a body and make it work! It was amazing!"

Dom grunted, not happy. "You're married now Neal. You can't have him for yourself."

Dom didn't get the angry comeback he wanted when Neal chuckled. "Thinking of dying your hair red?" he teased.

"What?"

"Oh, you know." Neal leaned back against the wall, smiling dimly at his cousin. "There was Cleon, now Thom, and I always suspected that she admired Merric's hair. Maybe she has a thing for redheads. Really there is nothing the same about the two men other then that. You've seen Cleon, he's a giant. Thom is more slender, tall like his father, but lean. His hair is even darker then Alanna's and his eyes are kind of like Kel's, but with more green in the hazel. You know how Kennen has grey eyes, and I think she admires your eyes as well so really their color doesn't matter." He tugged at his chin, playfully measuring his cousin with his eyes. "You're actually a pretty good fix between the two of them physically. Not as bulky as Cleon, but have wider shoulders then Thom. All females like wide shoulders, regardless, but the hair! Far too dark for our Protector's taste!"

Dom let his head lull forward into his hands. "Will you forever torment me with this? Will it be your new past time to remind me how unattractive I am to her by talking about men that are more _appealing_? More _deserving_?" There was raw grief in his voice, something Neal hadn't predicted. It was like the man was morning a fantasy.

Neal pushed himself off the wall. "Look, you are deserving, alright?" He sighed. "I don't even think Kel did love Cleon. I mean, sure they acted as others did while courting, with exception to the whole secret thing," he smirked at that, "but Kel just didn't seem to…be into it." He finished lamely.

Dom snorted, lifting his head. "I'm not stupid, Nealan. I was with her during the Progress and I saw how she behaved when we left and her _Knight_ wasn't assigned near us. Her mind wandered, she wasn't as alert as she always was, she looked _lost_." He hated remembering. "She wouldn't look at me in the same way she used to. Something was different. She didn't even want to talk to me at times! When I would touch her just barely, just as a friend to a friend, she would move away or look some where else! She would pull out of my touches and just go back to work even when she was worn to the bone, even when I told her to rest."

Neal looked thoughtful for a moment before he sighed. "She was a little girl then, Dom. She was…fourteen when he even first kissed her. She didn't know what she was thinking; none of us knew what was going on when we were in relationships back then. She, predictably, just liked being courted. When Cleon told her he had to end it because of his wedding of course there was a little pain on her features, but she seemed more relieved then anything. Not a major compliment to Cleon I would think. He was rather upset over the split and wallowed for a good while before he started working things out with his wife. I actually felt bad for the poor fellow. He was so contrite over the fact he had to leave her, seemingly hating himself for it, while she just grinned and got back to work. She seemed to be working even better then usual even, like he was some _burden_."

"Ouch," Dom muttered and meant it. It sounded so cruel, so unlike Kel. "You said they acted like the average couple. Does that mean…?"

Dom was disgruntled by Neal's pause before answering. It left him wondering it he was really getting a truthful answer, though the reply seemed genuine. "That's something I really don't know. I know they had kissed, me and some of the others would leave then sneak back to hear what they were saying, and what we saw sometimes," he paused and looked at the other man, probably judging his expression, "wasn't excepted." He amended from what he was going to say before. He looked over to Kel as she laughed at the small knight next to her. "It's quite possible that it had…progressed into something else. Me and the guys weren't always around them and they managed to slip away every now and then." He grinned. "Not like it was very heard to find them again."

Dom's fingers began to cramp and he realized his hands were fisted. He stretched out his fingers. "Did…does she have the charm? Do you know?"

Neal shot him a harsh look but answered all the same. "I asked Yuki that once. She looked when they were in the baths and yes she has one. _Don't_ even consider testing it."

Dom held up his hands defensively, his face showing humor while his stomach dropped. "It was only curiosity. I don't think I would approve to finding her being so careless and not having one. Nothing is worse than a pregnancy scare."

"And you would know that."

Dom tried not to look as offended as he really was. "I resent that cousin. I am merely a flirt. That doesn't mean I bed every single woman I have playfully teased." Dom gave him a pointed look. "Before Yuki you were much the same though you seemed a little more coy over it all."

"I think you are just as coy as I was." Neal drawled. He held up a finger. "The real difference is that I grew out of it. You will too." He walked off to where Kel stood with the Lioness.

What was he talking about? Dom wasn't coy, or bashful, or timid, or any of that silly stuff. He wasn't some timorous little boy! Dom looked over to Kel and saw her laugh at something Neal had told her. His stomach twisted. He wanted to know what he was saying. Neal knew too much, and even though he was blood Dom wasn't sure if he would tell her or not. Dom didn't want Neal to interfere because if Neal did he would bring others with him.

Dom blended in with the other men better and watched as Kel made the Lioness chortle. His heart gripped for what seemed like the sixth time that day. It was drawing to an end of the thirty minutes and Dom announced his retirement to the men. Loud protests broke out from the drunk men. Offers for more drink and dancing weren't tempting to Dom and he turned them down easily, insisting that he needed fresh air and was considering spending the night up on the wall. The men's protests were loud enough to draw the attention of anyone in the room and when Dom left he looked to see Kel watching him. He grinned at her before exiting the hall.

Once outside Dom leaned up against the frozen wall and waited, his head tilted back. The ceremony was running late into the evening and it was already dark out. The sky was darker then the deepest water in the Emerald Ocean. An explosion of stars streamed out of the light provided by the waning gibbous moon. Thin almost transparent clouds slid over the moons glowing surface in Dom's vision and thick frozen tuffs of snow fluttered down to melt on his cheeks. It was a sad thought that these clear winter nights would come to an end. January was almost over and it would only be a few gentle February storms before March ripped up the Realm. It was simple to say that Dom was not looking forward to the increase in the wind and the snow melting. It was only on occasion now that they had mud, most of the time it was frozen under the snow, but going into the spring months the snow would begin to melt. Traveling would be harder and there would be mud slides.

Dom let out a clouded breath and let his worries dissolve with it. Closing his eyes he let himself drift for a while thoughtless.

Crunching snow and a soft voice drew Dom back into his body. His hands instantly became moist. "Sorry. I didn't want to leave at the same time to prompt suspicion."

"So devious now are we? What happened to my Kel?" He chuckled, liking how it sounded as 'my Kel' rolled off his tongue. He opened his eyes and turned slightly to let one side of his face peer at her. His throat caught and he turned the rest of the way around. "Goddess bless," he breathed, staring openly at Kel as she stood in front of him. Moon beams illuminated her skin were it showed and caused her hair to glitter with gold and bronze flacks. She shimmered where she stood, the light bouncing off of her robe causing the fabric to glitter. "You look-you look beautiful."

He saw her flush and Kel looked down at herself in disgust. "I look ridiculous." She informed him tartly. A blush crept up Dom's neck when he realized what he had said. Kel didn't take notice. "This entire outfit is nonsensical. It feels like I'm hiding in my own skin."

Dom cocked his head, pushing off the wall. "You look like you. You're just a little more…shinny then usual." He tugged teasingly at the gold fabric.

He smiled when the woman before him graced him with a laugh. She eyed his tunic. "You look rather shinny yourself." It was Dom's turn to scowl down at himself but Kel shook her head and put her fist under his chin, stopping him. When he looked back at her quizzically she pulled her hand back. "You fill out that tunic very nicely Dom." Kel blanched at admitting she noticed how his shoulders fit snuggly against the fabric. She calmed her embarrassment. "Don't complain."

They began to walk. "I suppose you're used to finery such as this," Dom said mockingly, tugging on his tunic front, "from living there and all."

"Not really. Yuki just went a little overboard on the costume since she knew Neal would let her. Normally weddings have scarlet candles and decorations in honor of Yama while the bride and groom wear white or cream. So technically this was more of a Tortallan wedding then she let off." She laughed softly, music on the wind. "These are more dress kimonos, though not extreme ones. Some can be really outlandish, the obis much bigger." She tugged the stiff band uncomfortably. "If she was being really formal Yuki would have dressed you men in kimonos as well." She chortled lightly at his dismayed face. "It's true. Some of the Noble men in Yaman would wear them every day. Most men just wore the haori, like what I wore during our dance. Commoners had it easy. The women just wore yukatas while the men wore happis or hantens."

"I got nothing out of those last two sentences." Dom admitted honestly turning to her with a grin. "Yukata? Sounds like you gagged on something."

She pushed him playfully. "It's just a linen kimono. Thinner then this one and lighter. They're for hotter seasons since they have no linings."

"Teach me to say something in Yamani," Dom asked abruptly. Kel looked at him with raised brows and he looked at her like a child begging for a cookie. "Please. You said my accent was good and Yuki taught me a few words already." He beamed proudly. "Neal taught me the swear words. Very useful."

"Trust Neal to learn that first." Kel muttered. "What all did Yuki teach you?"

Dom told her the phrases he had learned and the grammar tools he had picked up. He explained his struggle with nouns though he was quite good with his verbs. Kel assisted him with proper naming, starting with his own, and explained plurals as well. His accent was almost perfect surprisingly, the roll and slur of his tongue just right.

The conversation had slipped into different Yamani names when they reached Kel's rooms. "What's your favorite name you've heard? Out of all of them which one was the best?' He asked as she slipped her key into the lock and pushed the door open. A frozen wind rushed in as they stepped through the entryway and Kel hurried to shut the shutters. When she turned around Dom was crouched by the fireplace fiddling with a peace of flint. Kel looked around the room. Jump was still at the celebration, weaving around dancers feet, and Domitan was no where to be seen. "Well?" Dom asked, his back still turned to her.

Kel thought for a second. "Hitomi," she answered.

A spark set the logs on fire and Dom straightened. His shoulders were shaking with silent amusement. Kel took off one of her soaked fabric slippers and threw it at his back where it left a dark wet spot. Dom picked it up and set it near the fire to dry, catching the other one when she threw it at him and setting it next to the other. His eyes were laughing when he looked at her. "Is that a boy's or a girl's name?' he asked, voice almost bubbling with a held back chuckle.

"It's for a little girl." Kel replied. Her feet were freezing now and she was shifting from foot to foot. At least Yuki hadn't had her wear zoris, a sandal meant to be worn with socks or bare foot. "For a little girl with blue eyes. That's what it means."

Dom tapped his temple, his wide mouth smiling. "A name proper for my first born daughter. That is if she has my eyes, of course."

"Stealing my baby names now?" Kel joked. "Do you really plan on being a father?" she asked seriously.

"Someday, but for now I'm too young in my opinion." He perched on a chair pushed against the wall. "I think I would make a rather good sire. What's your favorite boy's name in Yamani?" he asked to change the subject.

Kel leaned against the wall next to him. Dom saw she had more then one fan on her from where he sat. "Daisuke, means lionhearted."

"Tortallan?"

"Gabriel for a boy and Aubrey for a girl." Kel answered, wondering how they got to this.

Dom looked thoughtful. "Those are very nice names." He grinned wickedly at her. "I think I'll steal them too." Kel slipped her bare foot behind one of the chair legs and pulled out, causing Dom to tumble backwards and slide down the wall. He looked up at her from his vantage point on the floor. His face was solemn. "Rude," he accused.

They were silent for a long while. Kel looked away form Dom every time he tried to make eye contact with her. After a while it got to be too much even for Kel's patience. "So…," she said hesitantly. "How do we-do I-" She gave up, looking away. The uneasiness was almost causing her physical pain.

Dom tried to lighten the sudden discomfiture with a chuckle, though a nerves one. "First we need to get you out of that." He pointed to her kimono. His heart tightened. "Honestly I have no idea how to make that happen."

Kel looked down at the obi and remembered the number of weapons Yuki had given her to use just in case there was a sudden raid. She pulled one of the fans she had out of her obi. "I think we ought to disarm ourselves before anything." She said quietly.

Dom nodded and stood, kicking off his boots to rid himself of the knife that was hidden there. After he had taken off his sword belt he turned to face Kel. To his shock he saw she was still disarming herself even with the large pile growing on the chair she had pulled from under him. Three fans sat closed on the chair seat. Leaning against them were a hand full of black throwing spikes. There was a black steal push dagger no longer then six inches; sleek, sharp, and serious. Counting Dom saw three silver arrow throwing knifes that were a miss match to all the other black metal but matched the four silver six-point throwing stars. Laid neatly next to them was a deadly black throwing claw, meant to rake the skin.

Without looking at him Kel slid a dual blade kunai from her wide sleeve. It was an overall fifteen inch weapon with four inch blades at each end. Dom's mouth slid open. "Were you planning an assassination of some sort?" he asked in shock. Kel reached into her obi and drew out a coil of thick wire, good for strangling. "I knew Neal was going to be a bit eccentric from the beginning, but I never thought-"

"Stop being dramatic," Kel looked at him and laughed. Dom snapped his mouth shut. Reaching behind her head Kel pulled out the bira bira, causing her hair to fall into her face making Dom's breath hitch again, and set the hair piece down with the weapons. That's when Dom noticed the lead sealed tip on the flowered clip that was as sharp as his sword point. "Yuki wouldn't let me have my sword or glaive." Kel continued, not noticing his observation. She slipped off the obi and Dom saw pockets and slits used to hold her weapons. "I needed some sort of weapon on me just in case something happened. Women of the worrier class always carry small weapons hidden in their kimonos or in blind sight."

Dom watched her shrug off the outer layer of her kimono which she draped over the back of the chair. Flipping the inside of her cream sleeve out Kel looked at the mental staples there that would cut into an enemies face if she were to hit them. Instead of spending the time and taking them out Kel simply pulled off the cream kimono leaving her in her last layer. Dom noticed her suddenly go stiff. She turned to face him, her kimono slightly open from the lack of her obi. Dom's eyes looked to her collarbone. Resting gently against her skin was a thin golden chain. The charm itself was hidden from him, tucked under the fabric of her breast band but he was sure of the use.

Dom looked to her face, meeting her eyes. It was clear what she wanted, she was nerves, shy, but the want was clear on her face. That need was pure enticement, a drug that rippled through his blood stream, and Dom took a step forward. The lure she had on him was strong and when she looked to her feet making her lashes fan her eyes the tempt grew.

"I don't really know what to do." She spoke quickly. "I've never-I haven't…I don't know how to do this exactly." She let out a breath. "Do I lie down or something? How do you…."

Dom took a step closer to her and tilted his head to the side, bending so he could get a look at her hidden face. A smile slid over his face when he realized she was blushing and fighting for her mask. "We're not going to rush into this Kel." He told her softly, his nerves growing as well. It was real work to make his own words comprehensible. "You don't just go straight to intercourse."

Kel flinched at the word, but she looked up at him all the same. Her face was the same color as her robe. "I don't understand."

Dom felt a jitter run over his flesh and ran a hand through his hair. "You don't just…there's such thing as fore-play." He looked away before turning back and meeting her eyes again, willing her to understand. She still didn't and Dom gave up on trying to find the words that would make her comprehend what he was trying to tell her. Rather he took the approach he had used the night he made his offer. Taking in the rest of the space between them quickly he swept her into an embrace. Her body was ridged for a moment, obviously over the fact she was in nothing but a open robe, but she soon folded into him without resistance. Sweeping his hand up her arm Dom let his fingers lightly trace the side of her neck while his mouth went under her ear. "See?" he whispered against her skin. He felt her shiver against him and her nod.

Kel's brain was jumbled. Things seemed to be moving faster while the room grew smaller and hotter. She remembered the back of her knees hitting the bed what seemed like a minute ago and a moment later Dom pulled his lips back from her neck. He sat back and Kel waited for her fuzzy vision to clear. When it did she was honored with the vision of Dom's bare chest. The only thing was she never remembered there being a pause in him kissing her neck for either of them to pull it off. The last few minutes all seemed mixed into one.

She noticed he was smirking slightly, tugging his bottom lip in thought. Kel looked down and blushed deeper then she had before. Crossing her arms over her bare chest she met his eyes trying her best to hold her mask. "What?" she asked, her voice shaky.

"Just admiring the goddess's handy-work." He murmured and a smile tugged at Kel's lips against her while. Dom chuckled and she heard how genuine it really was. Smiling brightly Dom rested some of his weight on her again and held her in an embrace, not kissing her neck or whispering in her ear. He just held her to him, his head rested in the crook of her neck. It was relaxing for him to be there, though; she was embarrassed she hadn't realized she no longer was wearing her breast band.

Timidly Kel pulled her arms out so they wouldn't be separating them any longer and rested them on his back. His skin was searing against her own. Lightly, hesitantly Kel ran her fingertips down his bare back, feeling the years of sword work and training against her skin. Her hands stopped moving when she thought she heard him sigh. Moving her hands again she lifted them and cupped his neck with one, her thumb softly running over his skin while the other went to his hair. The dark brown threads flowed over her fingers as slick as silk. Silently she let her fingertips gently explore his memorable yet unfamiliar body. Bravely she let her lips brush his neck as his did hers.

That seemed to prompt him. Things began to move fast again and Kel didn't move to slow them. The odd sensation and sounds of skin on skin filled her. Kel was trembling with a rippling feeling that flooded her as Dom rose off of her again, balancing himself over her with his arms. She didn't have to look to tell they both had shed the rest of their clothes, she could feel it just fine, and she was too afraid to even look to clarify. Instead she shut her eyes and focused on her shallow breathing.

"I'm going to have to put strength behind it to enter." Dom warned her softly. He brushed her hair back from her face with his hand, caressing the side of her head gently. She moved closer to his hand, admittedly scared. "Do you want to stop? It'll hurt." She shook her head, eyes shut tightly. "Are you sure?" he pressed.

Kel opened her eyes and looked at him, burrowing into his very blue eyes with her hazel ones. "I'm sure," she croaked. She tried a casual shrug, which wasn't all too casual thanks to their position. "I've felt pain before this, I'll deal."

Dom hesitated for a moment before nodding and positioning himself over her. "Any point of time you want me to stop, just say so and we'll quit. It's on your word," he murmured to her in a torn voice. Kel closed her eyes, waiting for the impact he would have on her. She felt him rest a little more of his weight on her and he rested his head on her collarbone, his lips pressed to her skin. Then she felt it. Her virginal barriers being broken through and she gasped; her eyes flying open in shock at the pain she had known was coming but just didn't anticipate the intensity. "We can stop, I can stop," Dom breathed raggedly. He looked like he was having a difficult time himself, holding in the urge to go faster.

Kel shook her head. "No, keep going." Through the pain and brimming tears she felt her face heat up as she blushed, unable to hold her mask. It was embarrassing to hear the words. "I-I want you… to go in all the way." She closed her eyes tightly again, biting the inside of her cheek. "Please."

She felt more pressure and pain and bit her lip down, squeezing her eyes tighter. She wouldn't make as sound. If she was going to look her pain, she wouldn't sound it. "I'm sorry," Dom whispered against her skin making her body tighten even more. Kel felt a build up in her lower stomach before she was suddenly rocked with a new feeling that sent her soaring. She groaned uncontrollably and let her head fall back heavily. It hurt, but the pain felt right.

Dom rolled off of her and laid at her side, wrapping her in his arms and pulling her closer to him. He met her tired and hazy eyes and his own showed slight regret for his action that had hurt her. Kel's body was trembling in his hold, her breathing irregular. She stared back at him before the corners of her mouth quivered. He thought she was going to tell him to simply leave till she smiled and put her arms around him as well, resting her palms on his back. "Thank you," she whispered, voice still a little cracked.

Dom let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding and lent down, kissing her forehead softly. He whipped away one stray tear that ran down her cheek. "You're welcome, and I'm sorry for the pain."

Kel shook her head tiredly, making her hair tickle his nose. "No, I liked it." He drew her closer to him then, elated but at the same time miserable. She liked what he could do for her, but she'd still didn't love him.

**My first apearance out of…ten chapters now! I decided it was about time for at least one short authers note so here it is. I just want to say that this is as gritty as it gets in this story, sorry if I disappoint. I'm not going to write…lemons? Limes? ...Whatever! The only reason I put in the last bit (fine the sex scene) is because it just seamed like a real occurrence to me. I wanted it realistic in the way that it wasn't the most romantic and she did feel pain. Probably, as in really really not going to happen, there will not be other chapters with scenes like this in them. I want this to be a T fic. So maybe a high rated T, but still T.**


	11. Chapter 11

Manticora

She never thought it would be as submissive as it was. Sex. Kel had thought it was the equilibrium of a relationship for so long, but now she wasn't sure what it was. All she knew was that she liked it. Liked it a lot. It had hurt yes, but there was something fulfilling about it. She felt whole in a way. When she opened her eyes to Dom's sleeping face the next morning she didn't move. Unlike before she wasn't terrified by the feeling of skin against skin. Rather relaxed by it. A tranquil feeling filled her and she closed her eyes again, resting her forehead against his.

"No nightmares?" She hadn't known he was awake. Kel pulled back and Dom stared at her groggily, his eyes hazed with sleep. She shook her head. There were no nightmares, but there hadn't been a dream either. Dom grinned. "Good." He said and pulled her closer to him, kissing her first of the forehead before pecking her brow and the tip of her nose. She thought he might have moved to her lips but he stopped there, pulling his mouth back to burry his face in her hair. "Are you going to get up?" He asked, referring to her early morning glaive practices.

Kel shook her head. "Too tired." She moaned and hid her face in his warm shoulder. His fingers danced down her spine making her every nerve skip.

"Then go back to sleep." He advised and pulled the blanket up higher on them, partly covering their heads. She smiled and nodded before closing her eyes to let the sleep wash over her again.

When Dom was sure she was asleep he pulled his head from her hair and scooted back some to see her face. She was tired, he could tell, and her body would be sore. She couldn't have timed it better for their night together. It would be a day of rest after the night before, and work would begin again tomorrow. Her body needed to repair itself from the new use, the irreversible tare he had put in her needed to rest undisturbed. Dom knew he should have regretted taking her virginity, but with her next to him he couldn't.

He thought of the things he had wished to say to her, contemplating the comforting phrases he longed to whisper to make the moment pass more memorably. He wanted to tell her she was everything to him, would be for life. She had been such a good friend to him and he wanted to tell her how it had progressed into something more. This is a bitter sweet moment, he thought as her slumbering breath warmed his cheek. I have what I wanted, I thought I would be somewhat satisfied, but I'm not. He looked at Kel as she slept and the vacant feeling in his chest ripped open further. He cringed at the feeling and reached out to her, placing a hand on her hip gently and pulled her closer still. She was warm against him, but it felt like she was laminated in a seal of glass, separated from him still. He watched her mouth murmur something in her sleep. He wanted to hear what she had to say, know what she was thinking, but most of all he wanted her mouth itself. The territory was for a lover and a boundary he couldn't bring himself to pass. He longed for it more then anything in the realm, but he would leave her lips to be marked by her true lover, not just whatever he was.

Maybe, in time, he would become her lover, an actual lover, a proper one. It was a far fetched thought, but Dom couldn't help but think it. Desperately he held on to the fantasy as he closed his eyes. Maybe he could change her mind. Maybe he could get her to see him.

Kel opened her eyes again hours later but this time not to the tangle of limbs and warm breaths, rather to the nipping cold at her bare toes. The comforter was rumpled over her and Kel moved her hand to reach out to Dom. Turning her head when her fingers didn't make contact with anything she saw nothing at her side.

Lead shot up her spine and she sat up on the bed, holding the blanket to cover her. Dom was gone, his clothes, his boots all gone. It was as if he had never been there, but he had to have been. She could still smell him, his scent lingering in the blanket.

Kel pulled herself from the bed and gasped in shock and pain. She was so_ tender_. She leaned against the edge of the bed for a bit before pushing herself to her feet. Standing she swayed and closed her eyes as the corners began to fuzz in. Opening them again she saw the mess that was she sheets. Her mouth slipped open slightly. Blood was…_everywhere._ She didn't think she could ever get it out again.

Looking down she saw she herself was smeared with blood, her inner thighs coated with it. She hadn't known it would be that awful! Sure she knew there was pain involved, but _blood_? Was she hurt? Would she need a healer?

No! She shook her head, banishing the thought. She would never tell anyone.

Her heart fell in her chest. He was gone. He had just gotten up and left, not waking her up or leaving a note. Kel crossed her arms over her chest when she was run through with the familiar frozen sword. She wouldn't think about it. She couldn't fall apart over a man.

"And last night…," she forced her eyes to stay open. Tears slithered down her cheeks. "Last night meant nothing."

She moved, ignoring the pain, to the bathing tub and stopped in shock. It was full, the water still creating a steam in the cold air. Kel didn't ask, she didn't have the voice, and slipped into the water. She leaned her head back and the tears slid down her cheeks, running into her hair and making dark streaks to the back of her head. Kel didn't feel them, she didn't feel anything. Her body was numb and silently she rubbed the blood from her body, tinting the water pink.

I'm such an idiot. She couldn't control her self disgust. She should have known he wouldn't stick around for long. Last night was just what it was. One night. She should have known it would all end the next morning. The soft caresses, the sad and friendly eyes, they were as good as a dream now.

How could I have let myself do this? She looked at her hands. They were trembling, streams of water sliding between her fingers. She'd let him get to her. Dom had been a weak spot for a while, for _years_, and now she had given way to him. How would she look at him tomorrow? Would he even take her seriously after last night? Kel held back a sob. She didn't want to blubber over it, over him, so she suppressed it in hope the feeling would fade.

When she stood drops of water ran torrents down her body, getting the floor wet. She ignored it, drying herself with a towel and finding a shirt to slip into. She looked at herself in the bit of mirror on the wall. Her eyes were red and raw, tears still trickled down her cheeks, and her skin was pale. She brushed her hair and teased it, but primping herself wasn't a distraction in anyway. She felt something rip, not like it had last night or in her nightmares, but something ripped in her chest and she slumped. At the moment she thought she was going to cry till her face collapsed, but she shook her head and busied herself.

Tugging the sheets off the bed she piled them on the floor. Looking them over it was obvious they were un-repairable. With a heavy sigh she kicked them aside and pulled out she extra set from under the bed. She has just pulled on the mattress protector when the door opened. "You're up!"

Kel's shoulders went ridged and she slowly turned to see Dom closing the door with his foot. He turned back to her, grinning and holding something. It was a plate full of food from the wedding. "No one's moving out." He said, setting the plate down on the small table in the corner. Kel watched him, not moving. "I'm glad you bathed. How're you feeling?"

He turned to look at her and Kel turned back to the bed, pulling on a fresh sheet. "I'm fine." Great Mother he was sweet. She glanced over her shoulder at him. "You drew the bath?"

He nodded. "Figured you'd want one pretty badly, that and you'd be hungry." He grinned and pointed to the food. "The cooks aren't even out. I was able to sneak in and take what I wanted." Kel looked at the food, seeing that there was a large pile of the caramel rolls on it with other sweets.

Kel looked away and back at the bed, pulling on the comforter. She didn't deserve this, she didn't deserve him. Just a moment ago she thought he had just abandoned her when really he had just gone to get her food. She bit her lip, thinking of him leaving her. The thought surged a choked sob that she couldn't hold in and the ripping in her chest began to burn. She gasped, her hands shaking and she dropped the comforter. She sat on the edge of the bed, her head ducked as she tried to control herself.

Dom was on his knees in front of her before she could get a handle on the tears and pain. She saw him hold out a hand when one of her tears rolled off her nose and he caught it on his broad palm. "What's wrong?" His voice was tender, almost hurt in itself. The tarring intensified, stinging like salt was thrown on the whole created. It hurt more for him to be upset, especially if she was the cause.

Dom put a fist under her chin and forced her to look at him. Morbid as it was part of him didn't want her to stop crying. The moisture shimmering on her cheeks made her seem human. Attainable. _Real_. When she snuffled he couldn't help but let the corner of his lips curl up. So maybe she still didn't seem completely human, to him at least. He had never heard Neal mention her seeming godly. At the moment Dom thought the sky would open up in sympathy for the tearful girl, shedding its own tears for her grief. He thought the ground would break out in tremors to match her trembling lips. She sure was having that affect on him, his eyes filling with their own moisture at her crumbling frame. Kel didn't brake down. If she did there was no hope for a man like him.

"Please don't cry Kel." He brushed back a tear but another just took it's place. "Did you have a nightmare when you fell back asleep? I thought this would work. I thought I could stop-"

"I did-didn't have a nightmare Dom." Her voice was strangled with held back cries.

"Then what's wrong? What happened?" He cupped her face, his palms becoming slippery and he cradled her head in his hands. He held her in such a dominant position, being able to turn her head sharply at any moment and snap her neck, and she felt so fragile to him. He didn't want to have such a leading pose. He wanted to touch her in a way that wasn't dangerous, but he couldn't think of one. She seemed so breakable. Anyway that he touched her Dom felt like he would snap her. Kel wasn't breakable. This wasn't right. "Please Kel," he begged. "Don't cry. What happened?"

"_You left_."

Dom's heart shattered. He gathered Kel in a hug and she folded into him gratefully, tucking her head under his chin. Her body shook as she continued to weep. He stroked her hair, rocking back and forth slightly like she was nothing more then a child. "I'm so sorry." He murmured. Dom pulled her back and looked at her face. Her eyes held their sweet sadness rather then the void of emotion she blocked him out with. His eyes slipped from hers, passed her pink nose, and settled on her lips. He could feel her leaning closer to him, see her lips part willingly for him. Dom couldn't resist her wish and his need.

Hands holding her shoulders firmly he pulled her to him, his lips sliding over hers. Senses heightened. He felt his pulse increase rapidly. The nerve endings of his lips burned and the world stopped its rotation. Everything narrowed down to Dom and the woman sagging against him. His body rippled with her soft moan, trembled as she slid her hands under his shirt and they balled into fists on his chest. A fire ignited in the back of his mind when his mouth opened against hers and they slid together to be met. He was at a loss for breath after a moment of warm interrogation of the new territory, but it was Kel who broke away first with a gasp for breath.

"I'll never leave you." He barely got the words out before her mouth was on his again. Their lips moved quickly against one another, but still not seemingly fast enough. Her hands slid over to his back while his fisted in her hair. A moment ago it had been only them, now it was just Kel. Her smell. Her taste. Her feel against his palms burned through him. He felt nothing but her. Only when she began pushing up the hem of his shirt did he pull back.

"So soon?" He questioned. Dom couldn't solidify his voice to more then an uneven whisper. Her lips tickled against his while he spoke. Kel nodded eagerly and pulled him back to her.

It wasn't till three days later did Aiden's and Osbern's squads with Kel and Raoul meet up with the centaurs. Kel, mounted now on Peachblossom, looked sidelong at her silent riding companion. Ezhno was looking forward without regard for her presence. His steely features were lit by the little light bouncing off the snow. His brow shadowed his already dark eyes, his lips were shut seamlessly, and he never twitched.

Some of the centaurs wore beaded necklaces; a filly had given her one, and sashes around their shoulders to block their bare skin from the wind. Ezhno had a sash of deep purple over his shoulder, but not to protect him from the cold. Kel saw a dagger imprint under the cloth. He already had a bow over his shoulder, a long knife in his belt, and a Scimitar attached to his hip. Why would he need another weapon?

It was just then did she realize that he was looking back at her. "It's rather rude to stare." His voice was clipping and Kel had to fight not to let him see her distain.

"I was just wondering where you got the sword."

"Yes, I did steal it." He answered, confirming her suspicion to that part. Ezhno looked forward again, staring at the hollow darkness before them. They had been at this all day, but still he didn't seem tired. His eyes were sharp and flicked from shadow to shadow. Kel saw as his hand slipped to rest under his sash, like he was trying to get warmth from it, and watched as his fingers curled around the blade. "We raided towns." He continued. "There were, on occasion, soldiers there for your silly war. Never very many since most of the towns were small, so they were an easy enemy."

"Seems a bit harsh," Kel mumbled as she looked out at the darkness as well. "Taking a dead mans weapon, that and killing him in the first place." Dark shapes danced before her sight. Confused weather they were real or not she wrapped her hand around Phoenix's hilt and squinted. Maybe she should have Neal check to see if her eyes were alright.

"I had every right to kill him." His words were tight like a vice. "He followed us from leaving the town and caught a colt in a bear trap. Planned to sell him at auction," he slid the dagger out of his sash slowly. "I killed him before he could put a lead on the kit. Blackhoof insisted I take the sword to use the next time-"

He was cut off when one of the shadows leapt forward, coming towards Kel. She unsheathed Phoenix but it made no difference. Ezhno was in front of her before she could blink. A strangled scream came form the creature that had pounced and Kel shuttered; her stomach knotting. The scream had sounded like a _man's_.

The screaming died and men surged forward. Kel felt Raoul place a hand on her shoulder, steadying her. She looked up at him and nodded, telling him silently she was all right. Dismounting she moved to stand next to Ezhno to see what it was he had attacked.

Torches were lit and passed around. In the flickering light Kel saw the creature and gasped. Around her she heard men equally surprised and disgusted. A creation between a man and lion was capped with red blood at her feet. Kel crouched down next to it. The creatures jaws had hinges that let it hang open completely, its mouth going from one side of its face to the other to pass through large amounts of food. Its teeth were broad and pointed at the tips. They didn't look like metal or human teeth like she had seen on other immortals. Instead they looked like bleached bone, completely white and strong. The rest of the head was completely human and by the look of it male.

Kel looked over the finer details. The fur was a golden color, stained bronze from the blood, and was thick around the chest. The body was well muscled yet slender. At the end of the long tail there was a stinger like a scorpion. Lifting a paw she carefully looked at the nails and blanched.

"Raoul," she called. He hunkered down next to her and she pulled the paw out for him to see. "The claws aren't silver. Neither are the teeth."

"What does it matter?" Ezhno sounded uninterested in the discovery.

"Silver nails and teeth are the sign of an immortal from the Realm of the Gods." Raoul told the group. "This _thing_ has neither. Either he was a mage experiment gone wrong or something else." He looked up and nodded to one of the men. "Bag it. They'll want to look at it at the University where they have the drake."

The next morning Kel stumbled into the mess with purple bruises under her eyes. Taking a seat next to Alanna she accepted a plate of food from Merric. "It should be at the university in a few days or so. Hopefully it won't start to decay as quickly as it would in hotter weather."

"You look tired." Faleron told her in concern. Domitan was sitting on the table next to Alanna and mowed.

Kel pull down her fork and rubbed her eyes. "I stayed up last night writing reports. The King wants one, Wyldon wants one, and even Numair wants to know what happened. By time I finished them it was light out." She scowled down at her food. "I need to go back and speak with Ezhno to find out what he saw then rewrite them."

"Why didn't you just wait till you spoke with him so you wouldn't have to write them twice?" Neal asked.

"That's not the way I do things Neal." Kel muttered darkly into her plate. Finishing up her food Kel quickly and silently dumped her plate and left the mess.

The snow was soft under her booted feet as she padded her way to the stables. A low wind whistled a hollow tune in her ear as it ruffled her hair. Kel wrinkled her noses as a rouge strand tickled her face. "I'm going to have to get it cut soon." She mused to herself.

"I wish you wouldn't." A voice floated to her ear.

Kel stopped and turned, peering through the light flurry of snow that had started earlier that morning. A dark shadow swiftly collected her in an embrace and familiar lips tugged on hers for a response. She obliged them gladly, allowing herself be led to a more sheltered corner. "Why not?" she managed to ask when they broke apart.

Dom rested his head on her chest. Above my heart, she thought. He'll be able to hear it beating, that's for sure.

Dom reached up a hand and cupped her neck, feeling her pulse against his fingers. Another sign she was real. "I like it longer. Frames your face, plus," he tweaked a strand that fell on top of his hand, "it's soft. Fun to play with."

"I have to go." She murmured when he slid his hand under her open jacket and looped his arm around her waist. "I need to catch up with the centaur herd."

Dom's head had been rested on her shoulder, nose nuzzling against her neck. He pulled back to look her in the eyes. "Alone?" She nodded. Dom shook his head. "No, I don't like it. You should have a squad or someone to ride with you."

"I'm only going to be gone for a while. Five minutes to find them, maybe an hour or two to talk with Ezhno, then ride back. With Hoshi it'll be no problem." She slipped out from in between him and the wall, tugging her hair back into place.

Dom reached out, taking her hand in his and spun her around. Kel looked surprised as she faced him, her mouth slightly parted. Taking advantage of that Dom kissed her deeply, pulling her close. His hands trembled, but he worked to hide that by locking them in her hair. He didn't want to admit that he was hurt. He had fallen sleep in her room the other night, curled up in the blankets alone and waking up to her face in the morning, but she hadn't said a word. She never mentioned being attacked by some _creature_. He had already known, the men wouldn't stop talking about it, but she never went into detail. Kel had never said a word about it even while he leaned against her desk, petting Domitan, and watching her write up the reports.

He felt Kel respond and that helped a little. The touches, the caresses, made it seem like she would tell him if anything like it happened again. For a while it made it seem like she knew he cared.

What if she cared? What if he told her the truth about him? How he felt for her and what he _really_ wanted.

She drew back slowly and his hands lingered in her hair before sliding down to rest at his sides. Dom studied her face. Her eyes were lidded, her lips supple and bruised from kisses. Something burned in her eyes. Something that made his stomach twist and churn.

"Kel…Kel I-"

"I'm sorry Dom." She cut him off. Dom visibly slumped. "I have to leave now." She leaned forward and gave him a quick peck on the lips. "I promise I'll talk to you later, but I have to leave." She hesitated for a long moment. "I'm…I'm sorry about last night."

Dom looked at her flustered. Had she noticed? "What about last night?" He asked stupidly.

Kel fidgeted, inching further away from him and looking at the battlements. "Nothing. Just that my thoughts were elsewhere." She fiddled with a riding glove she pulled from her belt. "I just want to figure this out." She looked up at him and gave a weak grin. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to trouble you with my burdens."

"No trouble at all." Dom waved her off, though, her last statement troubled him. Did she think he did not care? He looked her in the eyes seriously. When she tried to look away he caught her face between his hands and held her, meeting her eyes squarely. "I've told you this before Kel. You can talk to me. I know you know you can. Upset, angry, scared, any reason. Don't shut me out. You don't need to."

"I'm alright-"

"No you're not!" There was a sudden firmness in his tone. "You wouldn't be having these nightmares if you were fine." He looked at her and Kel though t for a moment he looked bemused. "You won't tell me what really happens in them, either." He dropped her face and took a step back. "Why not?"

Kel's head began to pound. "They're my prob-"

"Problem?" The confused look was gone, replaced by irritation maybe even fury. "That's just the thing Kel. If it's your problem it's mine as well. I-I'm your _friend_." The word made his throat itch. "I just want to help."

"You're being ridiculous." Kel waved him off. "Dom, you're starting to sound like Neal."

"Then Neal is finally starting to sound smart!" Dom burst. "Do you think I'm the only one who's noticed? They all know, even the people who haven't been around you in awhile. They can sense the change!"

Kel pursed her lips. "What?"

"Merric, Faleron, Yuki, Raoul, Buri, Neal, even Seaver who was here for no more then two days!" He looked at her incredibly. "You said before that you dreamed of memories with the Own? Of Scanra?"

She nodded mutely.

"Maybe you should ask for leave. Take a break; go back to Mindelan for a while. Maybe make some good memories to cover up the bad ones."

I was only a suggestion, but Kel still buckled at the thought. "No."

"Just think about it-"

"No, Dom." Kel said determinedly. "I'm not leaving New Hope till I'm ordered."

"You can't possibly live like this!" Dom sputtered. "I can help you forget for a night and morning at best, but the thoughts that are causing the nightmares are still there. Kel, even I've had to take leave for a while because I couldn't cop-"

"I'm not having trouble coping!"

"Then what is this!" Dom's temper went off like a bomb of Blazebalm. He threw him arms over his head in a very Neal-like gesture. "Why else would this be happening? Why-"

"Dom?" They both turned. Fulcher was standing no more then five feet from them looking dazed. "Dom, Milord would like a word with you." Dom paled uncontrollably. The thought of Raoul knowing anything about Kel and his relationship was terrifying though Dom was well aware that he wasn't. The closest Raoul thought of them was as friends or maybe Neal got to him and told him of his interest in the Lady Knight tough Dom was sure Raoul wouldn't mind.

"We're not through here." Dom replied tersely.

"Dom," He looked to Kel. She was staring at him forbiddingly and dropped her voice to a curt whisper. "Just because Milord says he would _like_ to have a word with you doesn't mean you have a choice."

He wanted to scream in frustration. She was right and he hated the fact. Not because she was right just what she was right about. "Fine." He huffed. "We'll talk later." He met Kel's eyes and saw her resentment. "_You promised_," he whispered. It came out as more of a hiss.

Reluctantly Kel nodded. Dom lingered for a moment before turning and leaving with Fulcher.

Kel stood there for a moment before she noticed the sun had moved in the sky. It was already noon and she needed to get the reports updated by the end of the night to be taken by the next messenger. Shaking off the thoughts of Dom she trotted to get Hoshi.

It didn't take long to find the herd. When she dismounted Ezhno was moving through the herd to meet her, Blackhoof trying to draw the attention away form the solitary human. "Let's do this fast." Ezhno huffed. Kel was fed up of dealing with piqued men. "The younglings always get riled up when there's a human around."

Ezhno seemed annoyed with her questions. Like they weren't worth the effort. When she asked him how he detected the creature as a threat he practically snorted out loud. "The way it moved." He sighed when he look said she needed more then that. "The creature kept repositioning itself. Bending over to get a good look, hunkering down to hide from sight, lifting its rear to spring. It…he…," Ezhno seemed flustered on what to properly call it. He snarled, surprising Kel. Surly he wasn't that confused. "He had the characteristics of a predator, not a prey." He amended. "And by all points the quarry was chosen to be you." He wrinkled his nose. "Though I don't know why. He probably wouldn't get any meat off of you."

Kel looked at him oddly. Most people would describe her as muscled. She shrugged it off. It was most likely different for centaurs who were wrapped in both human and horse strength. "Do you have any thought on what he might have been? Where he came from?" She asked as she jot down what he said.

"We have or suspicions."

Kel glanced up from her paper. "And?"

He sneered at her. "Wouldn't you like to know?" he pestered.

Kel's face was smooth as she took on her Yamani Lump stature. "The crown would."

She saw his lips twist and Ezhno looked away. "I doubt the crown would have much interest, but," he sighed heavily and turned back to her, "as the lady wishes." He said it mockingly, but didn't get any satisfaction from her calm face. "There is a beast," he went on glumly, "said to be bred by the water in the River Drell. The beast," he corrected himself. "The_ monster_ is pictured in old legends to have a treble row of teeth beneath and above." He indicated on himself. "It's said to have the greatness, the roughness, and the feet of a lion. His face and ears are of a man; his eyes grey, skin red, and with a tail of a scorpion casting forth sharp pointed quills."

Kel thought back to the creature now on its way to the university. At first sight the skin and eye color wasn't apparent and she hadn't the chance to get another look. The sharp teeth she had seen lined up with his story as well as the lion's body. Myth it may be, but it seemed possible that they could be the same creature. "What is it called?" she asked, waiting with her quill.

Ezhno looked surprised that she wanted to hear more and in his dark eyes she could almost see that he was also pleased. "Manticore." He told her. "It is called a manticore. The legend speaks of their fondness of flesh. 'Although the realms are full of divers ravening breasts, yet none of them are tilted with a title of man-eaters: except only the Manticore.'" He seemed to quote from the old tale.

Kel wrote quickly and looked back at him. "Do you think it's possible?" she asked. "Maybe a mage summoned it or made one to resemble the myth."

Ezhno shrugged. "Very possible. The creature doesn't match the tale perfectly. By how the story goes you can tame them by bruising their buttocks." He sounded amused by the thought. "It's so they can't work with the stinger. That was the first thing that I tried and he nearly got me in the face with it." He rubbed his nose, for the first time looking his age. His eyes sharpened and he dropped his hand. "Are we done here?" he asked crudely.

Kel nodded and blew on her paper, drying it. She didn't waste her time getting back to New Hope. Kel wanted to finish her reports before supper and the sun had moved again. She shared a few quick words with Blackhoof before mounting up.

The old centaur looked up at her with amused and aged light eyes. "He likes you. An oddity."

Kel looked at the centaur in confusion. "What? He _likes_ me?" She glanced over at Ezhno who had rejoined the herd and making an effort to not look their way. "You're mistaken. Ezhno if anything detests me."

Blackhoof shook his head, smiling. "I know Ezhno and he's akin to you. He's an odd stallion. Doesn't like to admit when something isn't appalling or awful. He would rather think of all humans as bloody monsters." He saw Kel's still disbelieving look. "I know Ezhno." He repeated. "I raised him as my son when we found him. He's fond of you."

Kel's ears missed the last sentence. "Found him?" she asked. "He wasn't part of the herd?"

Blackhoof just smiled and waved her off, moving to join the herd again. "Till next time Protector."


	12. Chapter 12

Are You Happy

Kel flexed her cramped, ink smeared fingers. The reports were on their way to their destinations and the pounding in her head had lessened. Wiping them off on her breeches she stiffly moved through to her room to find Dom reclined on her bed, head propped on the wall. His boots were kicked to the floor, his jacket hung over a chair, and his tunic with it. He was relaxed, the lacings of his shirt loosened and his hair mussed, but his eyes were keen on her the moment she walked into the room.

Kel knew he still wanted to talk, it was plain by the determined look in his eyes and the set of his jaw, but she walked past him to the dressing room. Tugging off her breeches she slid out of her own tunic and shirt. Placing them aside to remember to wash she pulled on her night shirt. When she stepped back out Dom opened his mouth to say something, most likely a grievance, but she cut him off.

"You die." He looked at her stunned, his mouth still open but the words limp on his tongue. "In the dreams, you die. Every one dies."

Dom moved over on the bed, allowing her space to sit down next to him. She did but didn't fold into him. "A never ending war, no victory, no remorse." Her lips tightened. "You put yourself in the way of a killing machine's claws to be shredded. Raoul got a lance through his chest. Everyone is slowly slaughtered in ways I've seen since I was a page and ways I fear. People who don't belong on the field, people who do, it doesn't matter. I've seen Tobe," her voice cracked. "I've dreamed he was killed on field with me. The refugees, old friends, and villagers are there fighting. And I try to make it stop. I try to change the dream. It's like the whole time I'm screaming at myself to stop, but I never hear because I'm in the middle of it all." He felt her tremble slightly, but she held her mask steady. "It lasts all night. It feels like it lasts for a night, not just a short dream that I'd forget in a few days. Before I told you it hurts. It really does. The moment my eyes open I feel frozen. I feel every blow that I took in the dream until I think I'm really going to die. But then I don't."

It was mute in the room for a long moment before Kel turned to face Dom. Her eyes were hollow, her lips pale. "Are you happy now?" she asked.

Slowly Dom went numb. The dead feeling started at his heart and spread through his chest, down his arms and to his fingers. He reached out his frozen hand to rest on her cheek, but Kel pulled away. "No," he said, his voice slightly raspy. "No Kel I'm not happy."

"No?" Kel asked. Her mask began to slip slowly and Dom's deadened body crippled further. Bewilderment and perplexity colored her eyes though the rest of her face remained neutral. Trepidation and worry were barely visible in her stare. "What do you want from me Dom?" She asked weakly, her voice rendered to a whisper.

Commitment. Adoration. Sentiment. Emotion. Fervor. _Love_.

"Nothing Kel. I don't want anything from you." Dom said rather then listening to his whim. "I just want you to be able to trust me. I want you to tell me things, even if you think I have no interest." When he moved to touch her again he was glad to see she didn't move back from him. "I _want_ to be part of your life Kel. I_ want _to know what happens to you and I need to know if you're in trouble or hurt or frightened or anything that upsets you. I'd love to hear the things that make you happy as well, not just things like this." He took a moment to go over what he was going to say next. "Kel, you know I care about you. You understand that, right?"

He watched as heat rushed to her cheeks. "You've said so before." She mumbled quietly.

"But do you believe it?"

He saw her struggle with herself. "I know." She finally answered. "But you don't need to worry for me. I'm not your problem, I can handle myself." She smiled at him. "I'm a big girl Dom."

He grinned back at her, lightening the mood. "I know. But that's not going to make me any less anxious."

Kel shook her head. "I'm a good girl," she said jokingly. "You don't have to worry about me getting into trouble."

Dom looked at her thoughtfully. "There is a saying. Good little girls make extremely wild women." He looked at her accusingly. "You're no longer a little girl, Keladry."

She pushed his shoulder. "I've never done anything considered _wild_, Dom."

He arched his brow. "Really? I thought you've been on an unruly rampage since you turned eighteen."

Kel turned her body so it was pressing into his. Grinning, she slipped her arm up his. "How so?"

"Well, for one you helped build a camp, which is an extreme really considering your carpentry skills. Then you go temporarily insane and race off the Scanra to save a group of refugees which resulted in Milord having to secretly send my sorry excuse for a squad after you. Not to mention that Esmond fellow, Seaver, Meathead, Hollyrose and his cousin chased after you followed by little Tobe and Owen. You really began to get a following when Sergeant Connic and his group joined Neal's rescue party. Any way, then you kill two threats to the Tortallan crown and return to Tortall with the abducted children and refugees. Not only did you run a wild rampage but the punishment was to simply build a new refugee camp which would be your second already and only at age nineteen." He took a deep breath then let it out and gave her a smoldering look. "Not to mention the past few nights. That is just another example of what happens when twenty years of innocence explodes."

Kel gave him a measuring look, her lips pulling into a smile. "Well, I knew I had_ some_ fans but Sir Domitan I never knew you were one of them."

"I'm hopelessly devoted." He teased, wrapping his arms around her and rolling over so she was on top of him.

Kel dropped the small reserves of her mask. "I'm not sure I remember what happens when my innocence explodes." She murmured before his mouth caught hers.

Kel's legs were putty when she tried to stand what seemed, to her, like hours later. She let herself fall back on the bed and jostle the mattress, causing Dom to chuckle. She swatted away his fingers when he ran them up her stomach and sat up, grabbing her night shirt and pulling it back on. She swatted him again when he mumbled a complaint.

"It's too cold." She told him as she lay back sideways on the bed. Dom nodded and tugged on his breeches, falling back next to her. "So, what did Milord want?"

Dom looked at her incredulously. "After what we just did _that's_ what you want to say." He shook his head, smiling. It quickly turned to a frown. "He wants half my squad to go after the riders to the capital and Mastiff. He doesn't want any attacks on them, especially the one headed to the capital." He rubbed his eyes, suddenly tired. "We leave tomorrow."

He looked over to Kel when she didn't say anything. Slipping a hand around her shoulders he pulled her to him. "I'll be back soon. A week or less."

She sighed, snuggling into his side. "Just don't kill yourself, alright. I don't want to loose any men. It's bad for the camps defense."

"Is that all you think of me as, Protector? A soldier?" Dom teased.

"Yes." She said solemnly, but there was humor under laying her tone.

Dom made a noise between a growl and a purr in the back of his throat and Kel yelped when he tucked his long nose under her jaw. "Are you sure?" He mumbled into her skin, hot breath sending ripples through her nerves. When Kel repeated her earlier answer she squirmed when he made the noise again causing his lips to vibrate against her neck. His hands slipped up her arms, holding her down to the bed. "Tell the truth Kel."

"So maybe I like you a _little_ more." She wiggled under him and Dom let his hands run from her arms down her sides, making her shiver. His fingers dug into her hip bones and he pulled her closer to him. Kel gasped at the sudden memory of them a few minutes before.

"I need more then that." Dom grinned. Kel's hands fisted at the sound of his voice and her beating heart. Damn it, he was enjoying this. Worse then that so was she. Her heart fluttered and her eyes stung as a hollow tone filled her ears.

All chaos broke out inside of Dom. He held her harder then he had before, his need tightening around her. His hands moved from her hips and he sunk his fingertips into her hair. He felt her body reacting under him without meaning to, her leg pushing against him to tug down his breeches. He looked at her face and saw the fire begin to burn in her eyes, the fire he was denied every time they were in the act by her closed lids.

When she shut her eyes Dom lifted himself completely off of her, holding his body over hers. A smile tugged at his lips when he heard her groan in exasperation. "Open your eyes." It came out as more of a command then he meant it to, but she complied. The chaos took over his mind as he looked into the swirling bits of green and brown. He felt his heart try to rip itself open, words butting their way to his lips. He hushed himself against her collarbone and felt her arching forward.

In mid kiss Kel took hold of his shoulders and pushed him back. Dom grunted and looked down at her, his eyes feverish. She avoided his gaze, keeping her eyes downcast as she wiped the corner of her swollen lips with her finger. "I thought you came here to talk." The corner of her mouth twitched and she was sure he caught it, figuring she was teasing him.

"You're no fair." He huffed. Rolling off of her he collapsed on the bed. "But you're right, I did."

"Well?"

Kel watched him as he pushed his hair back from his face, her fingers itching to do it herself. "What did the centaur tell you?" He asked as he readjusted his rumpled breeches. They hung low on his hips in danger of falling off when he moved.

Kel leaned back, catching her breath and righting her shirt. "The creature, he called it a Manticore. Apparently there is an old legend about it." Looking at the ceiling Kel relayed everything Ezhno had told her. She shrugged. "Really right now it could be anything. But oddly enough I believe what he said. I think it's the creature from the story." She frowned. "There's something about him that worries me." She admitted.

"The Manticore?" Dom asked. He turned his head and caught Kel's face. "Oh, so you mean the centaur." He grunted; a noise of disgust she never heard him make before. "Of course. What did he say?"

Kel shook her head, her hair fanning out on the bed and a clump flopping into her face. Dom's fingers twitched and he raised him hand only to get it off the bed by inches before putting it back down. "It's not like that. Just something Blackhoof said about him. They apparently found him. He wasn't part of the herd. Well, he has been for a while now. At least Blackhoof made it sound that way."

"And that bothers you?" Dom asked, looking a little lost.

Kel shook her head again, and this time Dom couldn't stop his hand from brushing back her hair. She turned to face him, smiling. His heart sped till her face went solemn again. "Blackhoof mentioned something about how Ezhno would rather think of humans as monsters then decent people, but then he says Ezhno's friendly to me. That he likes me." Kel saw Dom as his head snapped to the side. She made a face. "I didn't mean like that and neither did he. Blackhoof was just implying that he doesn't totally hate me, which I'm not even sure is true."

Dom nodded stiffly, his jaw set. Why was he scared about loosing her when she wasn't even his? He shook his head at himself inwardly. He was a mess to fall for a dreamer. "Out of the company, Kel, Ezhno would probably take to you the most. Actually most would." He tried a smile but it felt brittle and fake on his lips. He held out his arms, offering her warmth and comfort. "Come on, it's late."

"I'm going on a hunt tomorrow," she said firmly as she settled into his arms. It was almost like she was ordering herself to do so. Dom suppressed a chuckle. "I want these immortals gone." She sighed as she rested her head on his outstretched arm. "I hate how everything's suddenly complicated. It feels like I was still just the Owns squire last year. It feels like the war shouldn't have progressed this far." She buried her face in his shoulder, muffling her voice and forcing Dom to be soundless so he could hear. "I'm so tired. I miss the days when we laughed at nothing and just had a good time."

"That's part of growing up." He smoothed a hand over her hair only mussing it more. "Those moments still exist. You just have to look and work harder to find them." He kissed her on the lips gently, so sweetly Kel began to tremble. "Go to sleep." Dom advised and cocooned them in blankets.

Dom pecked her on the lips the next morning as he stalled walking out the door. "What are you telling them?" Kel asked. She knew that the Own slept close. They would know if he had left or never showed up.

Dom chuckled. "I didn't even need to make up a lie for them. They already assumed I made a lover out of one of the refugee girls." Kel looked at him with a raised brow and he shrugged. "I never said anything to them. I just let them believe it."

"Which is as good as lying." She sighed, letting her head lull to the side. She shook herself to wake up more. "It doesn't matter. It's not like I want them to know." Dom's face showed his obvious hurt. A sudden pang of regret hit her and she became frantic to reassure him, but why would she have to? He shouldn't care if they knew or not. He wasn't courting her. Another pang hit her.

Before she could say something his face took on the frozen, passive expression that made her stomach tighten with dread. "The men are nitwit, ignoramus ganders." The frost in his voice made Kel stiffen. "They haven't noticed a thing. Neither have any of your friends or the refugees. Your good name won't be sullied."

"What good is left of my name, that is." Kel added. She clasped her hands behind her back to keep them from giving away any of her emotions by rubbing her forehead or reaching out to touch the cuff of his shirt. "It's not just my reputation I'm worried about Dom. It's yours too. I know not everyone in the Third likes me. I don't want you loosing friends because of this." She waved at the air between them.

"Friends that can't accept that aren't friends of mine."

A smile tugged at her lips. "Well, you still need their respect. To work together you need them to listen to you."

"Just because I'm sleeping with you, they shouldn't be upset!" Dom's control buckled and he shouted. "You're far more respectable then any of those fat-headed-"

Kel covered his mouth with her hand. "Dom, please." She met his eyes squarely. "Calm down. They can't be that bad." She let him go.

Dom took in a deep breath and let it out as a sigh. "Let's just say if ignorance was really bliss they must all be orgasmic." He relished the look of shock that flicked across her face and chuckled when she hit his arm.

"Why in such a mood lately?" She asked, keeping her voice light. "Are you upset with me for something? Was there something else I said?"

Dom's face was regrettable and Kel almost wanted to cry out in relief. He wasn't mad at her!

"It's not you, Kel." He rubbed his face. It _was_ her actually, both of them really. His last reserves of self-discipline and control were running thin and there was the chance that at any point of time he would grab her and shake her so hard her eyes would roll to the back of her head while he screamed his fidelity. He had built a wall around his heart, but it had fallen while he slept with Kel curled in his arms. He needed time to collect himself again.

He looked at her and smiled but it didn't help much. His eyes said the saddest apology the world had ever seen which made Kel spike into misery. His sadness was suddenly hers and they both felt terrible. This was a fantasy, they were with the person they loved, but why was it killing them?

Because none of it was real.

"Kel, there was something I wanted to ask you last night that I forgot in all the…-" He broke off not knowing what to say. "Well, when we got distracted." He grinned.

"What?"

The grin faded and his face was slowly freezing over. "Why didn't you tell me about the Manticore when it happened? Why didn't you tell me you got attacked yourself instead of having the men tell me? I didn't know what to believe and what to ignore. You know they lie through their teeth about immortals they've seen and they came back spouting about some crazy thing that sprung for your face. They never said anything about wounds or bones. All they would talk about was how terrible the corps smelt and how fast Ezhno had been."

Kel fidgeted, moving from one foot to the other. "I'm fine Dom. You can see that for yourself."

"But that doesn't answer my question." His voice was steely. "Why didn't you tell me? You had all night to say something."

"Because if you didn't know then you couldn't care." Her voice was pitched low, hoping he would miss the words and just not say anything. She was out of such luck and his fingers slid under her chin, lifting it so they could stare into the others eyes. Kel flinched and pulled her face away. Dom let her go without protest.

Kel moved further from the door and Dom. "You need to get down there else wise you'll be the last to show. What'd they ask then?"

Dom grabbed her arm when she turned and tugged her back to him. He let himself fill with ecstasy as her breath warmed his neck. He kissed her pleasantly, gently folding his lips over hers. When he let her go Kel glared at him. "You like doing that, don't you-" Dom pressed his mouth to hers to silence her. In truth, he did like twirling her around for a kiss.

He let her go and watched her dazed look for a bit before collecting his things. Before he opened the door he kissed her warm cheek. "I want to care, Kel. I _do_ care. And I find pleasure from it." He squeezed her awkwardly around the shoulders in a one armed hug. "Be good, and don't kill anyone who doesn't deserve it. If I come back and fine an extra scar on you I'll be very, _very_ upset."

The moment Dom left the room his stomach tightened and his mood soured again. He had to take a moment to collect his breath. If he didn't he would hit the first person who came up to him. Lately it seemed he was just starting fights just to feel something. It was like he had to feel the blood rushing in his veins to know it was there. He looked down at his hands and the crescent scars carved into his palms from his nails. He listened to the noises coming from Kel's room, leaning against the wall next to the door. There was the sound of soft foot pats and a few taps. She was using her glaive, he was sure of it. He was starting to grow familiar to the sounds of her practice dances seeing as he woke up to them a few times.

He looked down at the shinny pink scars again. Kel was cool but cruel in a way. Dismissive to the thought that he might actually care about her more then something to just keep him warm. She was completely able to hide her true distress from him. It was going to make him sick with worry about her on the rode.

The horn called and he could almost hear the men complaining. Pushing the last of his thoughts of Kel back he ran, taking the back ways to the barracks to get his things.

Kel didn't wait long to go out on a hunt. She strapped her glaive to her back, hooked Phoenix into her belt and began to saddle Peachblossom. That was when Raoul found her.

"I ran into Dom this morning." He commented casually, leaning against the stall. "He was running a bit late to meet up with his men." Kel just looked at him blankly, knowing he was going somewhere. Raoul pushed back his thinning dark curls. "He mentioned you saying you were going out on an immortal hunt." He grinned, his eyes dancing. "Aiden's squad is getting their gear on. They'll be down here in a bit to get their horses then you'll be heading off to meet up with Blackhoof and some of the stallions from the herd."

Kel looked at him incredulously. "Raoul…sir, no. I was-"

"Going to go out alone?" Kel was silent. "I'm getting Drum. Don't even bother trying to ride out ahead of us. There are people on the wall watching for you." He walked off.

Sure enough when Kel waited at the front gate there were men watching her from the wall. By time they met with the herd she was simmering with annoyance. She saw the centaurs that were to go with them. Raoul dismounted and went over to the group of man-like creatures. Most of the men stayed mounted, though some did merge with the rest of the herd to talk while they waited for Raoul and Blackhoof. Kel slid form Peachblossom's back, her nerves fraying while she listened to the squads banter. Any other day she would have joined in with the jokes and laughter, but that morning she didn't want to be one of them.

Per usual, when Kel blended with the herd she was pulled into one of the groups. A few jittering mares took a hold of her arms and butted up against her as fillies pranced around them. The mares gabbed questions about the fort, the attractive squad, and the capital city where she trained. It wasn't hard to tell, at times, that she wasn't just talking to foreigners. They pushed against her as they led her to a patch of ground clear of ice and snow, shaded from the bright sun. Settling there they reached out to play with her hair, touch her skin and smell her clothes like she was an exotic article. Their curiosity reminded her that they were liminal beings, not only human but a beast as well. Being a part animal hybrid, with a fraction of their behavior still matching that of a wild and untrained horse, Kel was considered an oddity to them.

She saw them pull out beads and strands of thread from pouches. While they continued to chat the mares took strands of her hair and began braiding them, entwining the colorful threads and beads with the hair. One of the fillies took her hand and studied her fingers before making a bracelet of sweet grass around her wrist. With nimble fingers she pulled out more and more grass from another one of the pouches and laced them through the bracelet. The little centaur girl twirled the grass around one another and Kel's hand till it reached her fingers. Her little fingers moving fast she worked the woven grass into a fingerless glove. Taking Kel's other hand she did the same.

Kel pulled back her hand and wiggled her fingers. They moved freely and the grass surprisingly made her palms warmer. She looked at the little filly that flipped a tuff of sun bleached hair from her face like it was a forelock. "Thank you." The centaur smiled and Kel was surprised by the sharpness of her teeth. She looked back down at her hand again.

Suddenly the mares around her stood, moving away from Kel. She looked around at them, noting the pointed grins on their faces. Kel looked at the little filly that had gloved her hand. The girl was giggling sharply as she trotted to hide behind a chestnut mare. She peeked behind the older female's tail, peering impishly at Kel.

Kel barely got to her feet before she felt the group begin to rumble and hear some of the herd shout. Turning around with a frown she saw that the crowd around them rip open. A youth pulled up snow and ice and he raced to them, grinning and laughing with glee. He looked over his shoulder and Kel saw another stallion follow after him, racing to keep up while another pushed out of the herd, equally gleeful.

"Catch up!" The first centaur yelled to them. Kel stood there in shock, watching them race straight to her. She wasn't expecting him to grab her and when he took her arm she screamed, turning so it wouldn't dislocate from her shoulder. With little effort the centaur half turned his human body, grabbed her under her other arm with his other hand and dragged her onto his back. Withdrawing his one hand he held her down with his other to keep her steady while he galloped off, heady away from New Hope and the herd.

Kel slipped from his hold and turned so she was no longer on her back. She tried not to teeter on the centaurs back or to scream. He was going so _fast_. Faster then she had ever gone on any horse.

She hadn't even gotten a chance to sit in a proper position before she felt an arm wrap around her waist. She yelped when she popped from the centaurs back, but not like when she was jousting. The only pain was the pressure on her ribs as the arm around her tightened and dragged her onto another back.

The wind burned in her eyes and she shut her eyes against stinging tears. The centaur now carrying her laughed heartily and changed direction, making Kel jostle on his back. She wrapped her arms around his human waist to keep herself on.

"You'll have to go faster then that!" The centaur called to the one who had formally been carrying her.

"Not as fast as you'll have to go!" She heard him call back.

The centaur carrying her grunted and she felt them slow till he stopped. Kel slid from his back but when her feet made contact with the ground her knees gave way and she fell forward. Silently she thanked the little filly for the odd glove like grass hand warmers. She hadn't noticed how tightly knit the strands of grass were till she noticed they didn't rip or fall apart as they ran across ice and gravel. Dom wouldn't have a reason to be upset over another cut on her palm thanks to them.

"We were just playing keep away." She heard the centaur and looked up to see the last person she wanted to.

Ezhno barely glanced at her before he looked back to the younger centaur. "With the human?" he asked frostily. Kel shuttered. It reminded her too much of Dom when he was being unreceptive.

The centaur's voice sounded like strangled defiance. "We were just playing around."

"She's weak. She's not like others of our kind. Just because she's light enough to ride doesn't mean you should throw her around." Kel looked at his disbelievingly. He looked at her from the corner of his eye and she thought she saw amusement. He turned back to the youth in front of him, probably no younger he was then by two years.

"You wouldn't let us go on the hunt." He snapped defensively. "We just wanted a little fun." The other youths nodded agreement, casting glares at Ezhno.

Ezhno snorted, blowing hot air in the other's face, and pushed past him as a horse would do to a misbehaving colt. He reached down and took Kel's arms like the others had, his grip surprisingly gentle, and hoisted her onto his back. "That was Blackhoof's decision. If it were mine I would gladly let you come. The herd seems to be getting a bit too thick in my opinion, and you would make good bait to lure any adversary to us. But Blackhoof insists on keeping you away from the action so you can safely stay with the herd."

When he turned to head back to camp Kel stopped him. "Wait," she struggled, her head spinning. "At least let me sit up right. I can't take riding like thing."

She could feel Ezhno roll his eyes through the back of his head. "Very well, but get situated quickly. They're going to think something happened."

"Like what?" She asked as she swung her leg over him so she was straddling his back. If felt weird to sit like that on him, knowing him and having had conversations with him. Sure she spoke with her horses, but they never talked back. "That I was kidnapped by a group of your stallions?" She watched the younger centaurs as they galloped back at a faster pace.

"Precisely." He muttered as he sped up his own pace. Kel panicked briefly before she gripped his shoulders, holding herself steady. "I don't want to be the one to blame if your men start setting fire to our things."

"The Own wouldn't do that." She protested, her voice tottering on violence. She heard Ezhno huff. "We've worked with centaurs peacefully before and the men are already taken with the herd."

Ezhno looked over his shoulder, dark eyes glittering as he looked her. "It looks more like we've taken to you." He glanced down at the grass clad hand gripping his shoulder, then her braided hair. "But that doesn't mean a thing. Are you saying you've never killed one of my kind?"

Kel gritted her teeth. "I'm sure you already know that I have." His lip gave a satisfied curl and he faced forward again. "But," Kel continued, "I remember you mentioning killing one of my kind as well. Why would it be wrong if I did the same?"

"I had a reason." He seethed. "He was taking one of our young."

"And I killed a centaur, the only one I've killed, because he stole on of our young. A little girl that he had tied in ropes and carried off during a raid. It was a fair fight if not him having the advantage of hoofs to kick out with. I fought him on the ground with my glaive while he fought with a cutless and throwing-axe. I was blinded for part of the fight when he kicked dust and rock in my face. He got to kick my stomach into my throat, and I got to sink eighteen inches of blade into his waist."

She felt his spine harden at her last words. "And when was this exactly?" He asked.

"Around six years ago when I was fourteen. We were in Harefield and I was blocking an escape route from the town when there was an attack. He had taken the child and along the way obtained a baby griffin." She caught his eyes when he glanced back at her. "I had my reasons too. We're not that different."

He chuckled, the noise supposed to sound harsh but only succeeding to come out stale. "A noble child has little to recognize with a wild immortal."

Kel pursed her lips. "Well, you got me there. But The Girl, Lady Knight, Protector of the Small, and Yamani Lump have a lot to recognize with an immortal."

"Such as?" he sneered.

"People have tried to get rid of me before." She twirled a soft, white feather one of the mares had attached to the end of a braid. "I've been a stranger in a foreign realm. I'm the girl who wasn't wanted for so long." She grinned. "The girl who didn't have a place, didn't belong, wouldn't do what she was supposed to. I changed that. I found where I belonged." Kel shrugged. "Just like you. Joining into a family you didn't know and now learning to be the next herd chief-"

Kel was cut off from what she was about to say when she was jerked forward. Ezhno had stopped in his tracks and reached back. He wrapped his fingers around her ankle and yanked her from his back. Kel gasped as he held her by her leg just above the ground, the muscles in his arms barely straining.

"_Shut up_." He said through gritted teeth. His eyes were hard onyxes looking down at her with distain. "Who told you that?" Kel bit her lips together, a silent refusal. His hand tightened on her ankle and she felt her bones whine as they groaned together. "Tell me."

"No one told me anything." Kel said while she tried to push her hair back from where it tangled in her face. Her arms fell limply over her head.

Ezhno tossed her unkindly back onto his back and began moving again before she could get situated. She held onto him, gripping into him with her nails. He didn't seem to notice and barked a scornful laugh. "Stupid, prideful humans. You never learn when to keep your mouths shut."

Kel didn't reply to that, proving him wrong and keeping her breakfast down. Ezhno ran right up to Blackhoof and Raoul when they rejoined the herd. Kel slid from his back and teetered a little, blinking to shed the tears caused by the wind. Her ankle throbbed but she didn't take any weight off of it, too prideful to show it hurt.

"Well," Raoul didn't seem amused and neither did Blackhoof. They both shot Ezhno a look like it was his fault the stallions had decided to play with the human girl. "Let's hunt."

**I would have posted sooner, but I was on vacation. No one can party like a drunk person can party. Well, it's actually more entertaining to be the only sober person around. And the only person who can stand upright. And the only person who doesn't drown in their drink.**

**By the way if you're having issues imagining the immortals, in this fic and in Tam's stories, I hope you do realize she didn't make up half of them. I've learned that people have been deluding themselves to believe so. If you need a visual you can just Google them sillies. Some of them don't go by the names in the books, like a Stormwing which is really a Harpy, but a lot do. A Manticore has pics too, but I'd stick to the illustration in **_**The History of Four-footed Beasts. **_**That is the illusion I used, not the stupid animated looking ones. Just, like, look it up on Wikipedia.**


	13. Chapter 13

…**I couldn't wait to bring Dom back in the next chapter, so I brought him back at the end of this one! Enjoy, and click the little purple review button at the bottom when you're done. I miss my reviews! You've been dropping like flies around Peachblossoms butt, but still the same number of hits…weird.**

Imposed Communications

"How can this be?" One of the men muttered loudly as they bagged another manticore corps. Kel was at Emmet's side with one of the men's head in her lap. She held him still as the healer pulled the barbs from the man's arm where the manticore had stung him. He said they were not poisonous, but the man suddenly went stiff in Kel's lap as Ezhno had claimed he would. He stopped fighting Emmet as the stall from the stingers flooded into his bloodstream, paralyzing him.

"These things are nothing but legends, how could they possibly be here!" She heard the man again.

"Because," she growled, her exasperation with the men bubbling over, "when you use the term legend you are referring to something that may or may not be true but still has significance that it is remembered."

She looked down at the man in her lap. His eyes were wide, glassy with fear, while his mouth was open from a scream that was now choked back. "When you use the term myth you are referring to something which is not entirely true yet still is claimed to be literally true."

"I don't see the difference." Someone Kel couldn't see complained. "What are these things?"

Kel looked over at the three black bags that held the other manticore. Ezhno answered the man, his voice bored. "Myths are simply false reality. These things seem real enough." He just glanced at the paralyzed man. "These are considered legends because of the fact that they could be real, as we are seeing at the moment, or they could be magically made by one of your mages." He turned to look at Kel. "Do you think you've had enough for the night?"

"This was supposed to be an immortal hunt. Spidrens, tauros', hurroks, not these things. We can't do anything about them till I get word back form the king and Wyldon." Ezhno just blinked at her, not caring. Kel sighed. "Fine, yeah, we should head back." She let a few of the men lift the man from her lap and strap him to his horse. "They'll be complaining in an hour about empty stomachs anyway."

The Own moved out before them, leaving Kel and Raoul to deal with the herd. Kel waited for a while, leaning next to Peachblossom away from the herd, while Raoul talked with Blackhoof over what they had seen. Her eyes just flicked over the herd, taking in droopy eyes and fusty colts. She could make out one of the stallions who had grabbed her. He was smiling while he flicked an irritated mare with his tail making her snort.

She saw Raoul as he walked back to her and Drum who pawed at the ground impatiently. His eyes rested on her for a second before flicking to something behind her. Kel felt a tug on one of her braids and turned. Ezhno's face was right in hers, stepping over her boundaries just as Dom had. Like he had done to the young stallion he blew hot air in her face, filling her nose with the smell of sage and lemon grass while making her cheeks burn. She used her mask to cover her discomfort.

"He told me what he said to you." There were razors cutting into his voice. "You don't know half the thinks you think you do."

"What are you doing over here lad?" Raoul said as he got closer, speaking to Ezhno like he was just another man from the Own.

"Just came to say good night to my human." He replied with a smile at the big knight. Kel looked away form Raoul and back up to look at Ezhno. Amusement danced in his dark eyes, but the hand he rested on the top of her head was heavy. He tousled her hair and bent his head so he lipped her ear, something Peachblossom or Hoshi would do. "Good night, Mundane."

Kel pulled away from him, trying to make her movement seem normal and not threatened. "Good night." She said blandly, keeping all terseness from her voice. She mounted up on Peachblossom, ignoring Raoul's look.

"So," he asked when they left the herd and headed back to New Hope, "you two are friends?"

Kel didn't look at him. "Not exactly." Raoul made an accusing sound, something between a grunt and a murt like Domitan. Kel wanted to laugh and would have if she hadn't known his thoughts. "It's not like that either!"

"Then how is it?"

Kel let her head lull to the side, forcing her eyes not to close. Last night she hadn't gotten more then three hours of sleep with Dom as a distraction. "It's not what it seems."

She could hear the smile in his voice. "And how does it seem?"

"What you think it is."

"And what's that?"

Kel grunted. "Raoul, you know what I mean. Contrary to, oddly enough, popular belief Ezhno does not like me. If anything he hates me."

"Sure, sure." She could hear the disbelief in his voice, but didn't say anything more.

Kel was in the stables, whispering to Peachblossom, when she felt the air grow heavier with another person's presence. When Peachblossom snorted she turned to see Alanna leaning against the open stall. She grinned at Kel, eyes dancing. There was a piece of paper in her gloved hand. "I got word that I can leave." She said cheerfully as she stepped into the stall, hanging back form the testy horse. Alanna held up the paper. "King's orders. I'm headed out to the coast tomorrow morning and will be off the docks by nightfall." She sagged against the wall, and Kel thought she might start singing with joy. "I don't even care about the fact they're boats! I get to go up north again instead of hanging back here. No offence." She added quickly after the statement.

Kel shook her head, throwing a blanket over Peachblossom's wide back. "None taken. Personally I would rather be here then going back to Scanra."

Kel laughed when the older knight rolled her eyes. "Yeah, but you have work to do here. Others, such as myself, do nothing but hang back while going on a few hunts. You already got to have fun in Scanra," Alana's teeth flashed in a wide grin, "now it's my turn."

"I hope you enjoy yourself." Kel said as she picked up her weapons and followed Alanna out of the stable. "But won't you miss George?"

Alanna's smile sagged a little, but still remained. "I always do, but he has his work too with keeping Pirate's Swoop under his hand while I'm gone." Something flashed in her eyes as she said that. "I'll be in Scanra for only a while though, and then it's back down to Frasrlund on the border. They think it'll go under siege in a few more months."

Kel nodded and they spoke on and off, getting their meal together and sitting down. The mess was nearly empty, the men already having had their food and gone off to rest from the hunt. "Who is it?" Alanna asked out of the blue.

Kel had to stop herself from grunting the question. "Who is what?"

A sly smile tugged at the Lionesses lips. "The man that has caught your attention of late." She laughed softly as Kel tried to cover her surprise. "We noticed you've been starting to act a little…_drifty_ for a while now."

"_We_? Who all knows?" She covered her traitorous mouth when she realized what she just admitted to.

Alanna set her tankard down after taking a sip from her cider. She smiled kindly at the flustered Kel. "Just us girls. Me, Buri, and Yuki started noticing something a little off around the time we started getting closer to the wedding. So…," she drew her question out, "who is it?" She saw the look on Kel's face and raised her hands. "Fine, fine. Don't tell me." She leaned forward on her elbows. "Do you love him?"

Kel was shocked by the question. "Isn't it a bit early for that?" She asked.

Alanna shook her head, her red curls flipping and tangling. "Not by that face." She said, pointing to Kel's head. "Not by the way you've been acting lately."

Kel was looking down at her hands. "How do I know if I'm right about this or not?" she asked her palms.

Alanna leaned back again, taking another sip from her cup. "Well, how do you feel?"

Kel spoke as she thought, biting her lip. "Excited," she admitted, "but still relaxed. He makes me feel so vulnerable having so much power over my opinions, but then so strong from his support. I feel comfortable around him. I feel like I can be myself. I want to bring him everywhere I go. Include him in every thing. I miss him when he's not around. I can't wait till he comes back. I tried to suppress it, but I keep thinking of talking with him. I keep thinking of playing with him and kissing him." She blushed, embarrassed she admitted to that out loud and to herself. "In my head I keep making plans for when he comes back. Keep thinking of ways to get him alone so I can keep him for myself. My mind keeps having these stupid urges to do silly romantic things, stuff I've never even thought of before. Things that are completely not me."

Kel looked up when Alanna didn't say anything. The knight was grinning. "Don't laugh!"

"I'm not laughing." Alanna assured her, chuckling under her breath anyway and making Kel fist her hands. She reached out and patted one, softening Kel's grip. "What do you two do together?" she asked seriously.

"We talk." Kel's cheeks flushed when she thought of the other stuff.

Alanna raised a brow. "About…?"

Kel slumped on her bench, propping her head up in her hands. "He gets me to tell him things I don't want to all the time. He's so tricky." She remembered back to a conversation they had one night. "Once he got me to admit to slipping in oil that some pages put on the floor outside my room when I was training. He laughed for hours about that and apologized the whole time he did so. He gets me to tell him what I'm thinking, even when I don't want him to know, and old fantasies and silly things. We talk about the war, about our families, and what we want to do after we leave here." Kel shrugged. "Stuff."

"Well, I know I don't have the whole story, but it sounds pretty serious to me." Alanna drummed her fingers on the table. "So, how is my old squire taking you being courted by his cousin?"

Kel froze. "Dom isn't courting me." She whispered.

Alanna raised her brow again. "He's not?"

Kel rested her head on the table and closed her eyes for a second before opening them again and sitting up straight. "It's complicate. Please don't tell him. Don't tell anyone."

Alanna frowned. "I won't, but what do you mean he isn't courting you? Have you-" Kel nodded. Alanna made a huffing sound and pulled her hair behind her ears. "I wont tell Neal, but you have to promise to get things sorted out with Dom. Find your boundaries. You're a young girl, Kel, and you have a lot going for you, but you're not mature enough to just throw your heart into this. If you're not careful he might break it."

Kel nodded and stood. "By the way," Alanna called after she had dumped her food. Kel looked back at her to see she was smiling again. "A messenger came around midday with a stack of letters for you." Kel glared at the older woman who lazily toyed with her spoon and ran to get the letters.

They were piled on her desk and she counted them, six in all. Opening the first she was elated to read her mothers crisp, clean writing. Her first letter from them. She read through it slowly, picking out unfamiliar names and places, reading the events that her mother described in great detail. Everything seemed familiar and foreign at the same time. Ilane spoke of places with glittering water and calm skies. Beautiful willows and soft purple mountains. Part of Kel ached to remember what it had been like there, but so much had happened since.

Her mother wrote of old friends Kel vaguely remembered. She mentioned another letter from a friend who chose to write and once Kel had finished reading she found it in the pile. A few memories sparked as she read and a smile pulled at her lips. Before moving on to the other letters she pulled out paper and ink and responded to the two letters in great detail. The one sent to her friend was a bit longer then the one to her parents, being as she was fitting in so many years, but she told her mother and father about the manticore and immortals.

She set the letters aside to be signed and sealed later after they were dry and opened a letter with Daine's name written on the front. A smaller note slipped out and landed on her lap, small and messy writing telling her Daine had slipped it in. It simply said that the baby was healthy and kicking every five minutes while complaining over the fact she couldn't leave the castle. She mentioned Princess Kalasin's wedding to the Emperor of Carthak and a few other things Kel just barely skimmed over.

Kel just quickly read through the other letters, her eyes growing heavy with sleep. Wyldon and the King pretty much repeated each other on orders for her while giving little information of the war's progress. All Kel knew was that it was getting thick up north even with the snow. Setting the letters down on her desk without replies, she knew they would simply send her another letter in a few days, Kel reached for the last letter.

The paper was creased, the page water stained. When Kel read the name she grinned. Sergeant Domitan of Masbolle. She ripped it open and read hungrily, still not expecting much.

'_Me and my men are out in the cold as requested. We should be in Corus in a few days by the progress we made today. I'll admit to pushing the lads a bit hard, but damn them to the Black God if I freeze my arse off it will be their fault._

_Ran into the messenger on the road as he passed us. Naturally he had to be searched before we let him pass, hope you don't mind, and we went through his letters. Hope you enjoy your letter from the parents and don't scowl. I didn't read it. Also who is this Kiyoshi sending letters to you? I'm not even sure if that is how you would spell the name._

_It will snow tonight. I'll be thinking of the warmth of your body next to mine while I cuddle with my saddle bags. To repeat my statement from this morning I want no cuts on your skin. Take care of yourself._

_Love Dom'_

Kel's ankle throbbed when she stood, holding the paper. She ignored the pain and read his farewell again. The casual use of the word was just that, casual. Or the love for a friend, but it still made her heart flutter ridiculously.

She felt stupid for doing it but after she finished she got up and changed, the letter never forgotten. When she lay down in her bed it was clutched in her hands, her fingernails denting it and holding it tightly. Closing her eyed she hugged her pillow to her side, a momentary replacement for an old presence.

The next morning Kel saw Alanna off. Before she left the older knight leaned down from her horses back and pulled the charm out from under Kel's shirt. Fisting her hand around it purple fire threaded through the metal. "Don't take that off." She advised and let it go, sitting straight again. "George got me to take mine off, and all it takes is one time. I admit I love my children, but you're still too young."

"Twenty isn't young." Kel protested, but still nodded agreement.

With little to do at the camp but wait for reports or hunt Raoul dragged her onto Hoshi's back. Briskly he informed her that they wouldn't be on the hunt today, that they wouldn't bring the men, and that she would remain silent.

"But Sir-"

"No but Sir." Raoul interrupted her forcefully. She looked up at him like she was a squire again and saw his serious, commanding face. The only obscurity was the elfin smile dimpling his cheeks. "I like the herd, they're good people to speak with and Blackhoof said he wanted to show something to me yesterday."

"Then why bring me? Why not one of the men?" Kel complained, stalling when she moved to get her things. Raoul threw them at her and she barely caught them as they collided with her chest. She glared at him, glad her sword wasn't one of the things he had thrown.

"They like you, and frankly I like you more then the men." He grinned at her and winked. "Don't tell them."

Kel pushed through one of the saddle bags he threw her and pulled out the grass woven gloves. Balling them up in her hands for a moment she forgot they weren't leather. Slipping them on the gloves fit her exactly as they had as the filly had made them.

Raoul glanced at her form the corner of his eye. "Well, come on get going. We don't have all day."

"Close to," Kel muttered but began to attach her bags to her saddle, making sure she didn't forget a thing.

Raoul left her it seemed as soon as they joined the herd. He should have just gone alone; Kel thought as she dismounted from Hoshi and led her to where the herd kept their horses or 'slaves'. She had just finished when one of the mares approached her. Kel recognized her from the other day as one of the mares who had braided her hair. She offered Kel a smile making her cheek bones more pronounced. Her pointed teeth were visible to Kel and made her stomach squirm. "Hello, I'm Favorblossom. Just Blossom really." She greeted, still smiling. "It's nice to see you around again."

"Raoul and Blackhoof seem to be becoming good friends. Your chief had something to show Milord and he brought me with him." She swung her saddle bag over her shoulder and held out her hand. "Kel," she introduced herself.

Blossom just stared at Kel's offered hand. Leaning forward she sniffed the palm before she began circling her, flicking Kel with her tail. She twined around her and looked at Kel side long. Prancing off she rejoined the herd, but looked over her shoulder to see Kel hadn't followed. "Come, come. We wouldn't want a repeat from yesterday, would we?" She winked wickedly.

"You don't think they'd do that again?" Kel asked as she caught up with her. She held her stomach, not recovered completely from the other days ride.

Blossom shook her head. "No, they probably won't go close to you today."

Kel frowned. "Blackhoof wasn't that mad about it, was he?"

Blossom laughed, causing a few older centaurs to turn and look at her. She simply bared her teeth to them and butted Kel forward. "It's more Ezhno they are scared of."

"Understandable," Kel muttered as she plopped down in the spot she had sat the other day. A stallion was sitting there as well with the little filly that had made Kel her gloves. Looking at them she could count the similarity between them all, making them out as siblings. Honey blonde hair marked each of their heads, though the stallion's eyes were a darker color then his sisters.

Blossom began gently tugging out Kel's braids once she was situated. "It's not just the fact that he's…well, callous-"

"Heartless." The stallion put in, obviously guessing their conversation.

Blossom shot him a look. "Shut it, Dill."

Dill? Kel thought. Something must have given her away, or he was used to it, because Dill looked at her. "Don't ask. The name itself is no better then the nickname." He pointed to the little filly. "That's Bena."

Kel smiled to the little girl, but she was too focused on something in a tattered sack to notice they were even speaking about her. Kel looked back to Dill. "I haven't seen you at any of the hunts."

"That would be Ezhno's doing." Blossom huffed.

Dill reached out and hit his sister, soft but still hard enough to make her scowl at him. "Blackhoof's too." It seemed to be an old fight between the two of them. Kel decided to hang back and listen, feeling her head grow looser as the braids and beads were taken out.

"Blackhoof wouldn't have cared if you went. He wouldn't have kept the rule if Ezhno didn't enforce it." She snorted. "One of the only things he'll agree with Blackhoof about. Probably just to spite others for fun."

"It makes sense." Dill muttered, shaking his head and causing his own braids to flop over his shoulders. "We wouldn't want to risk any of the young stallions before the end of spring."

Blossom wrinkled her nose. "I still think that the thought of you fathering any of the year's colts is disgusting."

Kel choked on a laugh when Dill's neck burned red. Blossom gave a pointy grin and looked down at Kel, running her fingers through her now loose hair. "Wouldn't you? He's my brother! I don't want to think that one day I'll turn around and see him frisking one of my friends."

"You're being mean Blossom." Kel turned to the bored voice and saw Bena glance up. She had more sweet grass in her hands and she grabbed Kel's arm, beginning to weave more onto the gloves already there. She didn't look up from her work as she spoke. "Even look at him. His face is brighter then Papa's head after being out in the sun for too long."

Blossom laughed and Dill scowled at her. Kel smiled when he poked his tongue out at her. "They're always like it." Bena mumbled to Kel. "Once or twice they'll take a break for ten minutes till they start up again."

"Bena's just so much more mature then us." Dill rolled his eyes.

"Actually, she kind of is." Blossom admitted, grinning. "Benny-baby can actually use what magic she has." She crooned to the filly to earn another glare.

"So centaurs do have magic." Kel thought out loud.

Dill shrugged, undoing one of his braids only to tie it back up again. "From the Horse Lords and only a little of it at that. Benny's got enough that she can actually do something with it. See," He nodded to Kel's hand.

"This had magic in it?" She asked the filly.

Bena smiled faintly. "Only enough to hold it together and make it strong."

Kel watched her as Bena's skilled and slender fingers wove the grass between her fingers and up them, making the glove complete. She finished the fingers on the second hand and began knitting the grass higher up Kel's arm to make the glove longer. "Seems like it would take a bit to me." She muttered.

"Benny's more modest then most of you humans." Dill informed her. "Those'll be as thick as dragon hide when she's done. Better then a falcon carrier's gloves."

"Thank you," Kel said to Bena. She just shrugged, looking at her work.

When Blossom asked a question about the King's Own a while later both Bena and Dill snorted, though only Dill said anything. "Don't even try to cover it up with one of them." He accused. Kel looked at him, tired of constantly getting lost in the conversation.

Blossom tilted her chin up, her lips thinning. "I don't-what do you mean?" Kel watched her lip twitch after she said that, like she was regretting she had.

"I've seen the ways you look at him." Dill was grinning. Looking to her side Kel saw so was Bena. Apparently this was funny. "It's-ow!" He cried when Blossom hit him. Bena began giggling sharply, her shoulders shaking but her hands steady.

"You shut your mouth or…." She never finished her threat, looking up and away form her brother. Kel followed her gaze and saw Ezhno shouldering his way through the crowd towards them.

His eyes flicked over Dill, lingered on Blossom for a bit, before meeting Kel's look. "Blackhoof wants to show you something." He said gruffly, looking uninterested and annoyed.

"I'm not done quite yet." Bena muttered, not giving Kel her arm back as she finished with a glove. Kel flexed her hand with the one finished glove on it. The grass didn't even itch. "Wait a minute, please."

Ezhno blew out a shot of air. "I think what he wants is a bit more important then whatever you are doing to the Mundane's hands."

Kel spoke to him as she observed her finished hand. "I doubt it seeing as there is no hunt today and Raoul came here for personal reasons. I'm sure whatever Blackhoof needs from me can wait a moment without him caring."

Ezhno's face pitched red and he opened his mouth to snap something, but Bena let Kel go before it escaped his lips. "Done," she proclaimed. "Don't worry about getting those wet or anything. They'll hold."

Kel stood only to have Ezhno snatch her arm. She contemplated bending his finger back till he let her go, but decided against it. She smiled to the siblings. "I'll talk to you later." She managed to say before Ezhno began pulling her off. She saw Blossom's eyes linger a moment longer then the others and her thoughts clicked.

Oh, that's what Dill meant.

"It's rather foolish and discourteous not to come when the ambassador of the group you are meeting with calls for you." Ezhno said without letting his grip loosen on her.

"Blackhoof doesn't seem like the kind of man to follow the sort of etiquette that ties down humans." Kel retorted. "And wouldn't it be just as rude to drag around one of the ambassadors of another group of human's trying to work with you?"

Ezhno looked back at her, face blank. "Maybe Blackhoof is the sort of man who ties himself down by your human rules, but I for one don't." He squeezed her arm tightly before letting her go.

Kel wanted to rub the spot where his fingers surely left bruises, but refrained herself from doing so. "I didn't need you to tell me to know you don't follow etiquette." Kel said nonchalantly, following him. Ezhno only snorted.

When Kel came up to Blackhoof he smiled, not seeming to care about the wait at all. He was talking with Raoul animatedly about some of the weapons the herd used. "Sir Raoul mentioned that you used to live in the realm where this weapon originated from." He offered her a white oak tonfa, tapered on both ends and short. "Can you us one?"

Kel heard an undertone in the question as she ran her hands over the smooth wood. It was a question of her skill, a polite one, but still an assumption she may not be as able as she was said to be. She looked up and met his pale gaze with a smile. "Would you like a demonstration? I haven't used one of these for a long time, but I still remember most of what I learned."

Blackhoof seemed interested and nodded. Moving to a position with as much space around her as possible Kel took the other tonfa from Blackhoof. Holding the handle grip tightly, but still slack enough that it could come, she crouched a little. Tonfas, she remembered, were preformed in practice dances like her glaive during practices. To start out she did the first move she was taught and snapped her hip, swung her arm, and flicked her wrist. The Tonfa whistled through the air at a speed that would crack an opponents jaw if it hit them. She jabbed out with her right tonfa using the forward end. While she did that her other hand swept the weapon in an over head blow, then swinging in to jab from the side.

The wood twirled, not as fast as she could get her glaive but still at an impressive speed. Kel controlled her movements; not wanting to slip on the iced ground or knock the tonfa's together making them splinter.

She stopped after a few minutes of continuous blows and looked back to Blackhoof. He was grinning as well as Raoul. Ezhno, however, was frowning.

"Show me how to do that." He more or less demanded, reaching out and taking one tonfa from her. He held it wrong, gripping the main body rather then the provided grip.

Kel shook her head and corrected him, moving his hand to hold the handle then letting him do the same to the other. "Holding it like this is more sturdy. If you grip it like you did before you'll most likely drop it."

He nodded and did as Kel said. For a moment his pride seemed to be pushed to the side.

Kel wasn't surprised when Raoul wanted to go back to the herd the next day. Kel agreed to go with him. While he talked with older members of the herd in Blackhoof's circle Kel talked with Blossom and her siblings or showed Ezhno how to use the tonfa's. She even taught him a few sweeps with her glaive, though she had to change them a little for him to use.

Every time she worked with him Blossom watched with or without Dill. Her brother would normally do something to make her hit or scowl at him and only stay for a while before he became bored. Bena never watched Kel as she worked with Ezhno, but she did talk with her after or before. One day she had given her a cloth bag full of ground leafs and dried berries before Kel went over to where Blossom was talking with Ezhno, well, more like arguing. She had her arms crossed across her chest and was glaring at him. Ezhno was just smirking.

"It'll help with any sleeping problems you have." Bena explained, gesturing to Kel's droopy eyes. "Mix it into a tea and drink it before you go to bed, but I advise you not to use it often. It makes your body as good as immobile for six hours. You won't move or dream or think. Nothing but rest."

Kel coughed, inhaling too much of the powder when she took a sniff. "It's like a drug?" she asked suspiciously.

Bena shrugged. "If you mean the medical sort, yes. It could become addicting, but that's another reason not to use it much. Don't use it twice in a row or more then three times a week."

Kel nodded and kissed the filly on the forehead. "Thank you Benny." She murmured as she tucked the bag away in a saddle bag, forgetting it as she walked to the two fighting youths.

The days dragged on and turned to a week before being followed by another. Hunt after hunt brought down more manticores, loosing track of the other immortals, and never creating a dent in their population around the area.

Kel glanced at the forgotten bag of tea powder for a moment from where it sat on her night stand. She looked away, dismissing the thought of getting a break from her own thoughts with a drug. Her fingers began to itch with the urge to use it, just once, but she ignored it and walked into the privy.

Her feet made a hollow noise against the floor as she trudged into the room. She pulled on a night shirt she had left draped over the rim of her empty bathing tub and brushed her hair and teeth.

Kel pulled back her hair; it was really getting too long, so much so that it just brushed her shoulders. The little square mirror on the wall showed her reflection. She scowled. There were dark bruises under her eyes and on her lids. Her lips were a dark color, red almost, from the dry air. Soon they would start to chap, they already hurt. Her eyes were red rimmed clashing with the purple and peach of her skin.

She was tired down to her marrow. She could feel her veins pulse in her wrists and neck, her breaths quivering slightly as she let them out. Kel closed her eyes before opening them again. She stared at the duplicate of her pregnancy charm. Slowly she flipped the clasp with a nail that she hadn't cut in a few weeks, long and rectangular now, and the fine golden chain pooled into her open hand. Face blank she let it slither between her fingers, falling noiselessly to the floor.

She didn't need it. Not when she would only be sleeping. If she could even get there.

Kel tossed in her bed, covering herself with the thin sheet while the comforter lay rumpled on the floor where she had thrown it. The room was smoldering and stuffy, the fireplace roaring with an inferno that heated the confined room till Kel was sticky. The heat snuffed her already thin breaths and she finally sat up and opened the shutters. A chilled wind swept into the room, tugging at the flimsy cloth covering her and tossing her hair across her face. Domitan, who had been sleeping on the bed, meowed a protest and jumped to curl up on the discarded comforter where Jump was already rested.

The sky was a sickly dark pink though it was past midnight. Electricity shot from one hazy rose colored cloud to another, dancing in the sky in thick tendrils to slender vines. Thunder cracked and she felt fingers inside her chest, curling around her ribs and splitting them apart like a person opening a book, but instead of the binding giving way effortlessly pain shot down her spine and numbed her to her toes.

The pain dulled her senses and Kel didn't hear the door open. She heard it when the latch fell back into place as it closed and spun, looking around in the flickering light. Dom stood there, staring at her without restraint, in front of the door. His chest was bare and pink from the chilling wind. She saw his hair was wet and heavy in places like it was frozen. Looking down she saw he had no boots, too. His feet were bare and pink just as his chest. In his arms he held a bundle of things. He dropped them to the floor and she saw his two saddle bags, his boots, and a rumpled bit of fabric she guessed was his shirt.

He took a step to her, his hands quivering. Without thinking Kel swung her legs over the edge of the bed, getting to her feet. "J-just got in." She realized he was shivering. Quickly she started to move, throwing another log into the fire. She turned to close the shutters, but hands stopped her and turned her around. She looked up at Dom. "N-n-no. Kel, I'm f-fine."

"Dom you're shaking." She began rubbing his shoulders, then took his bicep and rubbed it between her hands. "That's not considered _fine_ Dom." She looked up at him and met his eyes. Slowly her hands stopped their movements. His eyes were devastating. The usual impish sapphire now glittered an electric blue she had never seen, like someone had dropped food dye into the iris to somehow make them bluer. They reflected the picture of the sky outside her window behind her. Shards of pink played along the whites of his eyes while flicks of purple stained it where they mixed with his blue irises. She saw tinny specks of pale yellow from the brighter stars and thunder rolled again outside. Her heart continued to thunder even after it stopped, rattling in her ears unsteadily. Lighting flashed across his eyes, but rather then feeling the heat from the electricity she felt it from him.

Dom stared back at her, eyes smoldering. His eyes were a cold fire flickering as he wrapped his hands around her elbows, pulling her up closer to him. She saw the lightning crash through his eyes again, but his own heat overpowered it and made it seem just like another one of the stars, far and slowly dying. She saw a swirl of different things when she looked up at him. Need, like there was a necessity he hadn't had for a long time, and longing were ablaze under his lashes so strong her head swam. His lips curled, like he found something amusing, and Dom pushed himself up against her harshly, puffing out his chest so more of them would touch. His body slid over hers, parts touching that sent her reeling.

Kel gasped, the room beginning to shrink before her eyes. "I meant to say something." Dom told her between kisses. "But I can't remember what."

Kel mumbled something like encouragement as his hands fisted around her hips. Her nails dug into his back, the intensity and excitement overpowering her. She responded with enthusiasm and almost rage. He made her need him. He made her suffer without it being his intention. As they fell back she let her frustration reign as did he.


	14. Must read Life or Death!

Death to whoever doesn't read this

**Death to whoever doesn't read this! (All off you, my readers, reviewers, flame throwers, ex…!) Important note, questions, and answers!!**

**Cough, shuffle through a stack of reviews and emails**

"**Hello my readers, haters, and fellow Tam enthusiasts. I am in the process of creating my next chappie, but as you can imagine there are a few complications…well, not really." Smiles at camera and winks. "Writing is the easiest form of literature, especially in this style. If I was writing in Elizabethan slang it would be harder, but, alas, I haven't needed to do that since the end of ninth grade. Darn.**

"**Returning to the topic at hand," cough, "my writing. It seems like I've been collecting a few questions on the past chapters…emails have been flowing so much my mail box shut down." Scowls at the screen "Thanks fans. Now…let's recap on the questions."**

_Ezhno…I don't like him. You're not going to make Kel fall in love with him are you?_

"**Well, I am truly sorry that Ezhno is a douche. Really, I am but there is little I can do to stop him. See, he is based on a friend I know and is rather…fatheaded. Ezhno never listens to me when I write. He kind of writes his own appearances. But fear not little computer breaking minion, he is not and will not fall in love with Kel. Kel will not fall in love with him. Period. **

"**I may not have said this before, it has never been officially written down, but this story it a…K/D. There, I wrote it! Happy? Yaaaaay!!" Coughs and straightens tie "Sorry about that. Next question!"**

_Do you plan to kill Dom off before he tells Kel? What's taking so long?!_

"**Now, for a moment after reading this I started thinking and for a moment I wanted to kill Dom." Screams while running away from angry reviewers "Sorry, sorry. Let me rephrase that. At the moment I wanted to kill Dom just to spite this email." Crickets and loud yawns "See? Isn't that better then violence?**

"**Dear ones, I do not plan to kill our beloved leading man. Why so long you ask, why, I'm just proving my power over you. See how long I can keep you around and deny you what you want…." Cackles at the bad joke "I'm only kidding. The real reason is because I hate when Fics rush into love so suddenly. In Lady Knight they were friends. At that friends who flirted, but friends. But in the story the third person POV is focused on Kel, skimming over her friends, and our sexy blue eyed man. In the books in never mentioned what Dom was thinking, so there fore I consider this fic rather realistic in the ways of Tammie Toes.**

"**But do not fear. I have already written out the scene of the confession, but, my dears, remember I'm a fan of conflict. There must be shouting!"**

_I love that you do POV's on both Kel and Dom, but you need to put a breaker between the two when you switch them on and off._

"**But, sillies, I have no idea what you are talking about." Smoothes back hair with a sly look "I've never done a POV on Kel or Dom. You see, sweets, when you do a POV (for the ones who are confused that is point of view) you do it from that persons observations and narration meaning the character is reliving it in a memory or telling you what happens as it goes. With that the story would have the words "I" and "My" and "Me" and "Mine". But seeing as it isn't in POV's I'm using the words "Hers" and "She" and "They". **

"**Tamsies writes all her books (with the exception of Miss. Cooper) in third person. It is when there is a narrator watching the characters as the tale plays out. Picture Mithros or some god watching them from the other Realms or something. But the difference in this story is that not only are they watching and hearing Kel's thoughts, but Dom's as well. I think it just makes the story a bit fuller."**

**Now for what you've all been waiting for…**

_Is Kel going to pull a Juno and get Preggers?_

**Bigger writing for this is important!**

"I am very displeased with you my readers and haters. Do you consider my magnificent self to be so narrow minded? Do you think I'd just turn this in to the plain old fic? Kel becomes pregnant and falls into Dom's arms, weeping over the fact she could no longer fight and he had no love for her? Or did you think I would make her fight? Did you think I'd have her and Dom live happily ever after and Kel gives birth on the battle field?" Gags at the thought "No! No, no, no, no! I want there to be pain in this story. I want it to be real! In my mind I see it as this. Sex hurts. So far it had done them both some mental damage, but what physical damage will it do to them?

"As creepy as it sounds I have done some research on this all. I've even talked with my friends about it. Who talks to their friends about what you feel _after_ you slept with some one, not how it felt during the action?" Shrugs "Me. From the guys I've talked with they all say they can't get that girl out of their minds; that is if they really loved her or cared about her at the time. They all claim that they couldn't focus, others weren't as important, and they couldn't look at other woman the same way. To them it's like the more they get the more they want.

"Now, ladies, we all know the down falls to sex. Even you virgins! Pain on occasions, sickness, and mood swings. Then there is the big uh oh. The big bulge. The tap tap tap inside you gut. That's right.

"Babies."

**Don't throw fruit at me for the thought of Kel being pregnant!**

"But this story is very diverse. At the moment I could go several ways. Right now, I will not tell you too much, but this is it. The moment of truth.

"Should Kel be pregnant?

"The way I see it isn't that she would suddenly need to slow down, relax and tell Dom. No, I see it as speeding up. But, then again there are other ways to take the story. The thing is I put those possibilities in there to lead in and make her pregnancy more…interesting in the end. Like your idea Kelly Masbolle. I do plan to tie that in later."

**It all comes down to this.**

**Review and put…**

**A **_if you don't want Kel to be pregnant._

_**Or**_

**B **_if it will be okay and she pulls the preggers._

**Vote now!**

_(Sangfly)_

_Heather Love_


	15. Chapter 14

So what, filly8

**So what, filly8? I like to wear a tie. They're cool even on chicks and it matched my rainbow suspenders. Damn sexy. But how did you know I was a girl?! Have you been stocking me or read my profile?! How terrible!**

**But really, it's just the fact that people with less junk write better. Isn't it hun? No boy would write a story like **_**this.**_** No offence to anyone, but I've found guys under the age of twenty-five completely idiotic. Someone prove me wrong! Please!**

**Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight! (Go Mama Mia!)**

Wyverns

"My back hurts."

"Well, my hips hurt. We're even."

Dom lifted his head, the action seeming to be too hard a task and he set it back down. "I said I was sorry about that."

Kel snorted. "But do you regret it?"

A slow smile spread over his face and Dom shrugged. "How could I possibly?"

"Thought so," she muttered, finger combing his hair as he closed his eyes, head on her stomach. The feeling of Dom lying so contentedly on her bare skin felt odd, odd but comforting. "Do you want a pillow or something?" She asked hesitantly.

He muttered something, his voice too thick for her to understand but she saw the grin pull at his lips. "Nope," he turned his face in, pressing his lips to her flesh. Kel shuddered. "I'm quite comfortable where I am. You make a damn good pillow."

Kel's lip quivered as she fought to hold her face. "Well, I need to get up. Either you get a real pillow, or get up as well."

Dom wrapped his arms around her, pulling himself on top of her further. "No."

"Dom!" she sighed in exasperation. "I should have been up hours ago. It's far past dawn now and we have work to do."

Dom just looked up at her and smiled, fingers still firm around her. Even with the number of times he had seen her like she was, Kel still tingled as his breath warmed her chest. He grinned wider, probably hearing her heart pick up. "What is there that I would possibly _need_ to do today, Commander? I just arrived back last night with your letters."

Kel tried to sit up, but he refused to move and she fell back onto the mattress. "You have my reports?" She snapped, trying not to shove him to the ground while she struggled to get out from under him. "Dom, I need to read them."

"You have all day." He muttered into her skin. Dom felt her go stiff under him and suppressed a groan. "Really Kel, no one would care if you took a break for one day."

"I don't need a break." She protested. Dom met her gaze and recoiled a bit. A few minutes ago he couldn't get her hear one thing he said her head was so high in the clouds, now her eyes glinted. Her chin was set and there was a serious air around her. "Where are they?"

With a sigh he rolled off of her. "They're in my saddle bag, I don't know which one. They were too thick to fit in my pockets so don't even bother with my pants if you find them."

He watched as Kel quickly got to her feet. She dropped down to her knees at the side of the bed, trying to shield her body from his view as long as possible. That didn't stop him from noticing the bruises. His lips tightened. They were worse then the few she had gained from her fight with the tauros'. They speckled a sick green he hadn't seen the other night over her ribs. An old yellow band was wrapped around her ankle, healing but still wan. On her shoulders and neck there were fresher dark purple knots. Dom licked his lips. His mind shifted back and forth between two possibilities. One, she had been with someone since he left and those weren't bruises on her neck, though he doubted that with her being prude even to him still, or two; she had been an idiot and hurt herself.

Kel dragged her night shirt over her head and pulled one of his bags her side, riffling through it. "It would do you good to keep your things neater." She muttered as she pulled idem after idem out of the bag. She had a switch knife and a comb in one hand after reaching in and a dirty napkin in the other. Making a face she tossed the napkin and gently set the other objects down. "How do you find anything quickly? Raoul would have killed me when I was his squire if I kept my things like _this_."

"I like to keep some things messy, some things neat." Dom muttered back form the bed. Thinking to annoy her once she looked up at him he crossed his arms behind his head and sped his legs. "Take for example my room in the sergeant's quarters. My bed at the moment is crisp and made. There isn't a thing on my nightstand, but I have a pile of letters under the mattress and broken quills in the drawers." He shrugged. "My mother calls me a pack rat."

"Your room wouldn't be clean if you actually stayed in it for a night."

Dom gasped, clutching his heart though she couldn't see it. He watched as her shoulders shook and knew she had guessed that's what he was doing. He smiled and rested his arm behind his head again. "Are you tiring on my presence?" he asked, half serious. It was true. He had been there every night he could since the agreement. "Do you wish to pursue another's?"

Kel snorted, not looking at him as she continued going through his things. She gave up on the one bag and switched to the next. "And what other could there possibly be?" She spared a looked at him and caught how he was laying. Color burned into her face, tightening the skin of her forehead and cheekbones. "Dom!"

"Hush now." He grinned, letting his leg fall from the edge of the bed and press to her back. He moved it, trying to push up the back of her shirt. "It's hot in here. Do you expect me to let myself burn up under the sheets?"

She smacked his leg lightly and scowled at him. He was grinning boldly at her, his eyes twinkling slyly. She couldn't look at his face and averted her eyes. Her muscles tightened till she winced. Looking away from his face wasn't the best idea. It only caused her to allow herself to let her eyes roam over his exposed body.

Heat raced through her veins as her heart contracted and sped up, but her muscles cramped and she couldn't turn away or get up. Her eyes were fastened to him. His perfections and imperfections. The red marks where he must have been stricken recently, very possible her doing, the white lace scars that glistened over his skin that already glittered, and the small dimple he had received from an arrow. His scars stood out as a wed over his smooth and sweaty flesh, each coming close to touching one another before there was a large break where he was protected by armor or thicker leather. His arms were a tangle of muscle and battle treasures. Older ones, the white lace, were hidden behind newer bright pink scars that shown silky in the light. Smooth as satin if she ran her fingers over them.

Dom grinned and worked her shirt up to her shoulders with his foot. His eyes flicked over the bruises there.

He seemed soft and hard at the same time and without meaning to Kel's eyes flicked up to his again. The gentleness there only made the burning strengthen and she opened her mouth but only to let a croak ebb from between her lips. His hands were as quick as his smile and she was on the bed again, cradled on top of him.

He took her hands of leather and held them to his chest, above his heart. They turned to silk in the touch and he eased his mouth over hers. "Rest a while." He muttered between kissed. "I…just got back…. Being ignored…so easily makes….me….feel…."

He didn't bother to finish, his fingers lacing into her hair. He felt her fingers lightly stroke over his chest, felt her heart pulse even though her arms. She felt alive. She felt at peace, a completely different person then who had been lying next to him the other night. He could feel the anger on her then. He felt her need slip over him, her raw passion.

The passion now was different. The rush was slow and steady. Her fingers didn't claw into his back. Dom's eyes drifted shut, becoming heavy. A magic was hanging in the air. It wasn't like his cousin's and uncle's gift or the tricks players preformed with slight of hand on the streets. It was more powerful, striking him down to the core. The room was no longer that. There were no walls holding them in, hiding them from the world. He could have been holding her in front of the whole camp at that moment it felt so open.

His hand rested on the swell of her hip and Kel pulled back from his mouth, still lingering before resting her head in the crook of his neck. Her breath washed over his skin and Dom counted her breathes, but they began to slur together. She ran her finger over a nick he had received his first year in the Own, tickling him, but Dom didn't move. He couldn't convince himself that such a human action as moving was appropriate at the moment. He felt as though they were floating in a stall in time. That if he was to move it would make the universe start running again.

He lifted his hand, telling himself over and over again that nothing would happen if he did, and placed it on her head. His fingers laced into hr hair again, stroking it back from her cheek. He felt her sigh into his neck and snuggle closer. It was alright. She wasn't going to leave him anytime soon. He had been wrong.

But he hadn't.

A horn broke through the heavy air and Kel shot up, tumbling off of him. Dom sat up and the horn called again, calling them into position to battle.

He hadn't even thought of moving when Kel raced to her dressing room. Dom jumped off the bed, hunting for him lion cloth and tugged it on. He managed his breeches before getting lost in a search for his shirt. A minute later it hit him in the face after he lifted his head up from looking under the bed. Kel had thrown it to him, her other hand working on the clasps of a breast plate. Dom ogled at her. She already had chain male and plate on securely.

"Your chain male is in you saddle bag with the rest of your uniform." She told him briskly. "No point in you going to the barracks. Your swords in your belt from the road still along with a battle axe, yes?"

Dom nodded.

"Good. Put this on." She shoved his gloves to him. They weren't gantlets, but the leather was thick and would hold. He looked at Kel's own hands, confused to see grass woven around them up to her elbows. She threw him tunic at him. "Move!"

Dom watched her as they both stepped into the light outside. Her movements seemed purposeful, like everyone else's business was pitiful in comparison. With every step she took he felt a thunder ripple from her, making him shudder. Her hand moved to the hilt of her sword and wrapped around it, but her muscles never twitched to pull it out.

Kel seemed completely oblivious to the power that radiated off of her. Her eyes were focused, steely and burning with the determination to make the horns stop their call. She grabbed a man as he passed by in a rush, wrapping her hand in his tunic and pulling him to her. Dom pitied the man's panicked face as he met Kel's powerful gaze. "Where are the Own stationed? I have a sergeant who needs to find his men."

The man gave Dom a look like he had lost them and with that his command. "Answer her." Dom said through gritted teeth, hand slipping to his own sword.

The man grunted and directed Kel. "Commander Keladry, the Own are stationed to the flank of the camp to the east where the problem is."

Kel licked her lips and nodded. "And the problem, Sir?" She let him go.

"Wyverns." He said before trotting off again.

Dom looked and sure enough a yellow cloud rose steadily over the walls, creeping in to make his throat itch. He turned to Kel and watched as she swiftly unsheathed her sword with a fight to the death expression in her eyes. She took off at a run in the direction the man had said the problem was at. He followed behind her, baffled and awed.

Really, he shouldn't have been surprised by her determination. Never in his entire life had Dom met anyone as kind, and as cold, as Kel. She would kill for these people. Die for them. Part of him told Dom she would die for anyone. Her life meant to so little to her that Kel would stand between the rottenest of men and their death, determined to add years to their futile lives. It was another thing that made her soul so much more absolute then his for if it was his life he was risking for a life already wasted, Dom was sure he would move out of the way.

Kel separated from Dom once they arrived and moved to Raoul's side. "We have no mages strong enough to hold back the poison." Kel said quickly, knowing the fact already form the several checks she did over the fort. "We'll just kill them off as safely and quickly as possible. Where's Neal?" She asked, looking around at the men. "Where are the wyverns?"

"He's on the field with the rest of the men." Raoul looked at the wall. "A refugee with a weak gift for foresight said he saw them coming over the lit sky. If anything that means day, but the only problem is we aren't seeing them, only their fog. This could go on for hours before they show their faces and by then the whole camp'll be choked out."

Kel's mind gave a few steady clicks before deciding. She caught a man from the Own as he trotted by. He was young, a newer recruit, around seventeen. "Locate Nealan of Queenscove in this," she gestured to the men, "mess. Tell him he is to be stationed in the healer's wing under command of Keladry of Mindelan," she glanced to Raoul and he nodded, "and Lord Raoul of Goldenlake and Malorie's Peak. If he still refuses use force. I want him there and saving his energy."

The boy's eyes widened, guessing what a fight it would be to get the stubborn noble to leave the area, and he nodded his head. "Off with you," Raoul waved him away. The boy looked to Kel and she nodded, dismissing him. "So, what's keeping Nealan from the fight?" Raoul asked when the man had left. "Scared of his wife?"

"If that were the case Raoul I would have to deal with Buri too."

"Aw, but you could take them both." He joked without conviction. He was well aware how determined his fiancé was. If she wanted she could pull him from a fight, but being a warrior herself the thought had never passed her mind. "They're both little shrimps."

Kel thought of the short K'mir and Yamani faces if they were to hear that comment. "Short, and fans of pointy objects." She reminded him. "I'm only going to keep Neal out of this so he has the strength to check the refugees and fighters afterwards. So he can treat the ones who inhaled too much poison." She looked around. "Where is Buri, anyway?"

"Holding Yukimi hostage. Neal promised Buri six gold nobles if she could keep her from fighting. I think fighting is the easier task."

Kel nodded, not really listening. Her mind was whirling in thought and battle tactics. The horn called again, but this time not for a fight. "Friends are riding to the gate." Raoul managed to say before Kel took off at a trot, racing across the camp.

She received a number of odd looks as she wove her way through buildings and people, running the whole while and taking back ways. "Sorry," she yelled as she accidentally knocked shoulders with a man, but she didn't stop to see if she had knocked him over.

Kel ran like she had been taught to, strides long and affective. Her breathing was measured, not taking in so much breath that her lungs pealed with pain, but not so little that they shriveled.

Shooting around a bend and almost tripping she saw them. Ezhno and a group of ten other stallions stood by the open gate. Kel hurtled up to them and slowed her pace when she was within twenty feet. She walked slowly the rest of the way, seeing the grin on Ezhno's face.

"Need back up?" He offered, actually sounding friendly. She saw the tonfas tied to his belt with a leather strap. He had a bow over his shoulder and his sword at his hip.

"How'd you know?" She asked, her brain still ticking in thought. In her mind she was counting over the number of fighters. The possible areas for there to be an attack. Right now they had a problem with the majority of their fighters being in one place. "I just heard the horn myself not that long ago."

"Raoul sent us a messenger." He tilted his head to a boy who was leading his horse back to stables.

Kel lips twitched and she nodded. "Right. What weapons do you have? All the men."

"They all have a long bow. Some have knifes and swords."

Kel nodded, mind still reeling. "And the range on your bows?"

Ezhno made a face. "Far better then any you Mundane's use."

She ignored that comment, seeing as she had no interest in fighting with him at the moment. "Well, I'm going to set you with a group of archers. Get yourselves ready here. Do you need arrows or-"

"We have that covered."

Kel nodded. "Alright. Remain here and a group will come to join yours. When they do I want you in lead." She smiled when his face took on shock. "I've seen you fight and command before. You take charge and lead them around to be stationed at the east side outside of the camp walls. When I give you the call shoot your arrows up at a forty degree angle. That's_ important_. If the any of my men try to do anything early or you see them shooting wrong take it as a chance to knock them around. They may not want to listen to you, but they have to."

Ezhno thought over for a moment before he asked, "Why forty degrees?"

Kel licked her lips. "Arrow shower. Use all the arrows you have, if they miss they can just be collected later, and if you get a reaction _get out of there. _Run the men back into the walls, that's yours included, if there is any movement after that."

He nodded, understanding. "And the call?"

"You'll know what that is once you hear it." She waved down a runner and whispered to his quickly to have a group of archers called to the gate under her orders. When the boy took off she stood facing Ezhno again. "If the men choose not to listen to you just say I'll put them on latrine duty for a month."

Ezhno smiled and opened his mouth. "Kelly!" A shriller voice interrupted him and he shut it with a scowl, looking over his shoulder to where Bena pushed through the men with massive bags under both arms. "Where do you keep your sick?" She asked, standing impatiently at Kel's side.

"Bena," Kel said, stunned. "What are you doing here?" Kel glanced at Ezhno to see his jaw was set tightly.

"She insisted." He said though his teeth. "Bena is as good if not better then any healer. She wont tire and unless she runs out of supplies-"

"Which I never do." Bena interrupted, hoisting the bags up higher in her arms. "Dillies here with even more things. I brought more then enough."

"Dills here?" Kel asked, beginning to feel like it was some odd sort of house warming. This was like their official welcome into New Hope and they were bringing a present for sick people while fighting.

"Yep." She heard Dill as he came through the men, standing at his sister's side. Well, considering the size difference it was more like hovering. He grinned, his braids bouncing. He carried even more bags, some being strapped to his back. A heady bitter smell rose from them. Herbs. Lots and lots of them. "I'm here mainly as her pack mule."

"You're my assistant too." Bena reminded him and Kel suppress a laugh. The filly turned back to her. "Where do we go?"

She quickly instructed them to the healer's area and apologized for not being able to show it to them herself. They nodded and turned to head off to work. Kel looked to Ezhno again. "Any others?" she asked. He grunted and she grinned. "Good."

Kel sprinted back to where the men were stationed and called out orders, spreading them out over the ramparts. She broke off a group of ten men with bows and had them placed in the central camp where there was more open ground. They were instructed to shoot if anything looked like it would enter the camp. Men on the walls had pole arms at hand. They all gripped a halberd, guisarme, or voulge.

Her feet made almost silent thuds as she trotted around the ramparts, making her second circle. She would stop on and off, looking around at the men like a curious rodent before continuing forward. She smiled back at the people giving her amused looks and ignored the ones who arched their brows to her and scoffed. At the moment she wasn't really interested in what they had so say about her.

Kel's eyes skimmed around again and she dug in her pocket. There was nothing more she could do to get them ready and she drew a small wooden object from her breeches. Folding it in her gloved hand for a moment she leaned over the east corner of the wall. Bending over the edge carefully she looked down. She saw them there, pressed to the east wall out of sight of anything that could be around the corner. Raising the wooden whistle to her lips Kel blew a long harsh note that cut through the air.

She heard a barked word of command and watched as a few bow snapped to attention at once. A few men looked up, like they didn't believe there was a call, before they went back to their task. Kel watched as arrows were pulled back and loosed, watching as a black mop she knew as the top of Ezhno's head jerked around to shout at some of the men who still hadn't gotten the message.

Black arrows pierced the air, flying higher then the camps walls but getting ground under them as they traveled at an impressive speed. Kel followed them intently as they showered down into the ticket, waiting.

She got an irate and marred cry that shattered her bones in reply. Suddenly the camp broke into action and she ran to a place left for her on the wall. "Poles in hands!" She yelled. "Don't let them get too close!"

Large leather bat wings clawed at the sky as a serpent-like creature rose into the sun, followed by six others. Unlike its cousin the dragon they only had hind legs with eagle talons and were relatively smaller. Like dragons they had the same strength and ferocity, but lacked in grace, magic, and intelligence causing them to die off easier.

Kel pulled her glaive out and readied herself to swing. She took a moment to let her eyes flick to those around her. A wyvern advanced on one of the men, lashing out with its barbed tail to hit him in the face. The man ducked, dodging it just barley and another swung. Seeing its attack was thwarted the wyvern pulled back, flying higher in the air to shoot back down for another pass.

Kel swore as she was knocked down to the ground, her shoulder burning like a flammable substance lit. The pain didn't subside instantly; or at all for that matter, but she dragged herself to her feet and readied herself again as the anther wyvern shot down at her. There was an arrow sticking between its neck and jaw, oozing crimson blood, and another lodged in its eye. The skin was leathery, an almost beaded pattern, and not as shielded as a dragons scaled hide.

It lashed out at her, swinging its tail forward to strike her down. Her hands moving swiftly over the wood Kel swung in a hooked arch, clipping off the monsters tail. With a scream the wyvern pulled back, blood pouring from it now. The final bit of flesh that held the tail on ripped and the tail hit the wall to leave a blood stain as it fell to the earth.

Kel looked down the wall as the wyvern readied its charge again to see that the archers were still there, firing at will. She frowned. Only a section of them were there, all human, and darting back and forth out of any edict. She only managed to see two dark figures merge into the group to cause shouting before she had to turn her head back to the creature making a pin line for her.

Kel waited, hands gripping the wood steadily. In the back of her mind she whispered notes to herself that she wouldn't hear till latter. How the wood of her glaive didn't slide from her grip even with the grass wrapped around her palms. How her grip actually seemed stronger. How one of the shadows she had seen race into the archers was far lighter then the other. How she would need some one to help her clean the walls or enlist someone to do it if she was too busy.

To her back she heard a scream from the archers in center camp, but her mind was focused on the creature that was fifty feet from her. Thirty feet from her. Ten.

When it was within her reach Kel thrust out and up. The blade sunk in as far as possible and before the wyvern could pull back Kel twisted her wrists, crouched and buckled her knees, and ripped through the side of its neck. Suddenly the beating wings went limp and she dodged it, yelling fro others to do the same, as it fell to clip the corner of the stockade before falling to join its dismembered tail.

When she heard the scream again Kel turned around just in time to bring her arm up in a futile attempt to protect her face. A larger wyvern swung down at her with its tail as it shot by and the blow landed on her forearm before the creature flew up again to make another dive at a group of men.

Pain shot up Kel's spin as she was flung back, the speed of the wyvern putting power behind the hit. Her head snapped back as she hit the ground, her neck giving an audible crack. Her breast plate bit into her and Kel felt as it was torn away, the fastens broken. She heard as her shirt tore up the seams as she slid on the floor till the back of her head hit the protector wall making another cracking sound.

At the moment Kel had no desire to get to her feet again, but she heard her name being said over the men. She turned on her side and slowly lifted herself to her knees, palms flat on the floor. Thick syrupy liquid trickled slowly down her temple and her stomach rolled. The view around her spun and all she could make out was the stained floor, smeared and painted with her own blood. She winced and took her weight off of her arms, sitting on her calves. The shoulder that was hurt throbbed terribly and she ground her teeth together to hold in a hiss.

Fingers rapped around her shoulders and heaved her to her feet, making her move forward. "No," Kel panted, detecting the direction she was being led. She turned her head to see who had her, but blood spilled into her eyes. "I'm fine. Whatever it is it's just a nick."

"Commander Keladry, I can not understand you. Your words are slurring together." She recognized Qasim's desert man's burr, the thick sound of his words. She felt herself being swung up, arms wrapping around her legs and shoulders. She winced as fire laced through her, but she was unable to tell if it started at her head or her legs. She couldn't see, the salt in her blood making her eyes sting and pinch themselves shut.

Qasim lowered her a little, his hold not slacking and she guessed he was crouching down to avoid being hit. "I'm fine." She tried to protest but he didn't loosen his grip on her or reply.

She felt herself being passed on, another pair of warm wet hands taking her. Guessing where she was Kel didn't move, afraid if she did whoever held her would drop her over the wall. "Take her to Sir Nealan." Qasim instructed whoever held her. Kel fought the veil of blood to get a peek, but it was a never ending stream. "She was hit twice with the barbs. Make sure he treats her right away and be careful. She landed oddly on her leg and got a pretty hard blow to the left arm. Both are probably broken."

"I didn't break anything!" Kel yelled and choked, blood welling to her lips. Her ribs were on fire and her head swam. "I'm fine."

"What is she saying?" A new voice asked, probably the man holding her. All Kel could see was red black and white. "Did she break her jaw?"

"I didn't break anything!" Kel said again and thrashed a bit.

"No, I think she's just angry." There was almost amusement in Qasim's voice.

"Damn right I'm angry!" She choked again.

"Get her out now. She's already going into shock." Kel felt herself being thrown over a shoulder, an arm holding the back of her thighs to a man's chest. Her ribs screamed and her head drooped. Opening her mouth she groaned. "Go, go!" Qasim urged.

Kel let her eyes remain closed as they descended the ladder. Nassau rolled up and she pushed it back for later. It was hard to suppress as she felt herself bob as the man ran. "I'm fine." She said through gritted teeth.

The man ignored her.

"This is a sanatorium not an opium den! Get that smoke out of here!" Kel heard Neal's familiar voice cry. "Ugh! What is that? Are you burning hair in here?"

Kel felt warmth envelope her as she was brought into the infirmary. The air was thick and damp, nice compared to the dry frozen wind that carried the wyvern's breath to her nose. The room smelt like the herd. It made her muscles loosen.

"It's dried valerian root and stinging nettle. Mixed together with shiitake and lit it makes a smoke that if inhaled could remove tar from a persons lungs. It should ward off the poison from any of our lungs." Kel heard Dill retort.

"Kelly!" A shrill voice cut through the air and Kel was sure that everyone who had the ability to jumped. The man holding her did. "What are you waiting for? Go on, lay her out over there!" Bena's shrill voice made the man move. "What happened?"

The man repeated what Qasim had told him and his retreating footsteps were drowned out by the sound of hoofs as Bena and Dill moved around her. "Kel." Neal breathed. He sounded scared. "I don't have anything to treat her! Not when the poison was transferred straight to her blood stream."

She felt a damp cloth wipe over her face. "You brace her leg while I work, and calm down." Bena's voice was commanding, but the hands that cradled Kel's head gentle. "We'll need her breathing easier to tape her ribs. Dill, get me the yellow bag. The one with salvia lavandulaefolia in it. Also I need some phytolacca and oregano for the bacteria. Also get rauvolfia serpentna, pawpaw, and the purified extracts of the hibiscus sabdariffa I took earlier."

"And what do you plan to do with that!" Neal cried. Kel pictured him throwing his arms over his head. "Rauvolfia serpentna is toxic! I don't even know what salvia lavbla-bla-bla is!"

"Shut it Mundane." Dill growled. "Benny knows what she's doing. Plants work differently for her. She can use them better then you could wish to."

"I need a needle and a band as well." Bena said as though they had never said a word. "Do you have water boiling yet? Could you get me cup before you begin her brace?"

"What do you need boiling water for!" Neal snapped. "Tea? She had poison in her blood! No tea will help that!"

Bena's fingers pulled up Kel's lid. Everything was blurred and darker. Kel's breathing quickened and she couldn't calm it. "I don't plan to make tea, idiot." Bena snapped back. "I need to let it absorb a few things and cool before I inject it in her system."

"You're planning to sedate her?"

"No," Bena's fingers danced over Kel's brow, feeling her clammy skin. "Like you said some of the herbs are toxic. The toxin's cells will eat away at the poison. Then I'll inject her with another tonic to dispose of that."

Neal was silent, thinking it over. "It wont hurt her?"

Kel felt Bena pull her hand back. "Oh, it'll hurt her. I'll need the toxins in her for at least two hours before I put in the tonic. They'll nip at her, burn quite a bit, but it would be far better then letting the poison swirl in her. Two hours with poison Kelly will die. It takes twenty-four hours for the toxins to do any damage and far before that point she'll be full of the tonic. That'll dry out the toxins within an hour."

"No herb combination could possibly work so fast. They can't possibly stop immortal venom!" Neal shouted in disbelief.

A sharp pang went up Kel's shoulder and she groaned. "Neal," she tried to say but she finally heard how slurred her words really were.

The room was silent; the sound of breathing and flicking tails reaching Kel's ears. "Stick to what you know, Mundane." Kel strained to hear Dill's quiet growl. "Bena knows this. Your treatments may not cover what's happening to Kelly, but ours do. A talent-less mage has nothing to compare to Bena."

Talent-less? No one had ever called Neal talent-less with his magic. He hadn't studied in it as much as he had with his combat techniques, but no one had ever implied that Neal was poor with handling his gift. Not when they knew he was blessed with teachers like his father, the Lioness, and Master Numair.

A snarl rippled through the air and Kel felt a little unease at the sound. Since when did Neal snarl? "Fix her. Help her. Do whatever you need to and I'll help." His voice was strangled. "Just don't let her die."

"She won't." Bena said assuredly. "Now, pass me my things and get to work on her leg. We have a lot of work to do before we can get to her shoulder and ribs." She sucked in a breath and let it out. Her breathing that followed after was shallow. "Dill, help me drain her lungs."

**Ermm…guess I'm going to have to fit that other part in the next chappie. Only some of you know what that is….**

**Thanks for the reviews, and sorry for the fake chapter…hehehe. Sixty reviews. You've been holding out of me people! Humph. I normally get far less then that. Last chapter it was about fourteen which is the highest I've gotten. The chapter before that was like six.**

**That's it.**

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	16. Chapter 15

Healing

"Just give her the reports Neal." Bena snapped. "It's not like she can read them while lying back with her arm flat, and she'll be full of tonic soon enough."

"You can hold up a piece of paper with _one_ hand, you know." Neal grumbled as he snatched the papers his cousin had brought to the infirmary before he left on a patrol. Kel watched her friend through hazy eyes as he slowly headed back to her, taking his dear time. But, then again Kel didn't plan to harp at him much more now that she was getting what she wanted. Neal wasn't in the best mood over his nice clean infirmary smelling like a spice rack.

Fire laced down her arm when she lifted it to take the papers but she didn't drop it. She would be taking the tonic in a few minutes and she wanted the last moments she had with coherency to read a brief bit of what Wyldon had to say.

She got to the second sentence when the needle sunk into her vein. Warmth, beautiful soft warmth, flooded into her veins and the papers slipped from her hands to flutter to the ground. Neal bent over and collected them as Bena rolled Kel's sleeve back down. "We should use this every time she overworks herself." He muttered to Bena.

"I can still hear you." Kel slurred. "And I will not. Drug use is disrespectful." She reached out for the pages again. "Gimme. I can still read them."

Neal rolled his eyes and gave them back to her. He waited expectantly as Kel tried to read the print as it swam in her vision. Turning the pages sideways she started to rip them but Neal snatched the pile away before the tare could run into the letters. "Stupid words," she muttered, laying back.

Though she had only had a few ounces of wyvern poison in her system to begin with it still fried her to the marrow. The first time she had been hit with the tail she took a barb into the shoulder that stuck, sending the poison into her system. The second time she had been hit on the forearm where her skin was protected by her glove. Dill was right; they were as thick as dragon hide. They didn't tare.

As the tonic swirled around in her veins and cooled her simmering blood into a soft heat Kel watched the others interact. Bena and Neal were talking between one another about Bena's herbs and how when she used them they were stronger. On occasion they would snap at one another, but they were relatively behaving. Dill was wiping blood from himself again.

While the toxin had run through her veins in a blazing excruciating fire Dill had ranted for two hours to distract her while he went around the room looking at other patents. His constant voice was another thing that wore on Neal's patience.

"I ran out when I heard what was going on." He had told her when he had mentioned he was with Ezhno when he dragged her archers back into the camp. "I didn't like the idea of them being out there still and Ezhno leaving them behind. It was probably not the smartest plan to put him with stupid humans. He doesn't have much patience for that." Neal had snorted and sent Dill a glare which slid over him fluidly. "I knew if it was one of us out there he'd go after so I ran and he followed, obviously. Ezhno doesn't have much on me other then age and dominance. When I said I wouldn't head back till the Mundanes were in he had little choice."

"That was stupid." Kel had hissed through gritted teeth. It was the best she could do to speak without screaming. "Did you even think before hand?"

Dill only had shrugged at her. "I actually like being motivated by the burning desire to do something. I like giant leaps. They're fun, because they scare everyone around you." Hearing him Neal snorted again.

Now in the small bed Kel drifted in and out of understanding. Her thoughts made scene to her one moment then lost their meaning the next. "Neal?" she called.

"Yeah?" He looked at her from where he was sitting with Bena standing next to him, catching his breath from the healing.

"What do you think Peachblossom is thinking about right now?" She asked seriously.

Neal squinted at her, confused. "Err…his fondness of my flesh?"

"It's just the tonic talking. Kind of makes her a little harebrained." Bena said, getting up to hand Kel a cup of tea. "It'll wear off in a while."

"I am not harebrained and thank you." Kel said as she took the cup. Without thinking she drank the green liquid and gagged. "It feels like I have a horse shoe in my throat." She gasped.

There was a soft knock on the open door. "You should have figured out by now to be careful with anything they have you drink in this room." A familiar and soothing voice said. The soft gentleness of it rushed over her in a steady heat, more relaxing then the tonic. Looking to the door she saw Dom duck through the frame. "How is she?" He asked Bena.

"Domsies!" Kel's voice trilled. Her eyes were lidded and on the verge of closing. "You're back!"

"It's just the stuff she's taking. All things like this have a crash. She's probably got a few more minutes to her." Neal explained to Dom before he glared at Kel. "It's just spearmint and hibiscus flower. Drink it." He chided her.

"How many flowers have you had me eat today?" Kel muttered into her cup as she choked down the tea. It wasn't like the others she had taken when she was in a healer's care, but the taste was so strong it made her throat tighten. "Will I turn into a dandelion like you Nealan? Will Cleon begin calling me Princess Flower?"

Dill snorted back a laugh.

"You've had at least a bushel. That's far more then most Mundanes." Bena answered her, ignoring the rest of her question.

Dom stood in the doorway still. He cocked his head in confusion. "Flowers? You're using all botanical medicine? Are you doing phytotherapy too, or are you using the whole plant." Kel stared at him stupidly and Dom grinned at her. "I randomly quote Neal to see if people understand me." He sighed. "They never do"

"I understand you, idiot." Neal snapped, but he was grinning. "She's eating whole plants to keep her system balanced, but she also has a toxin and tonic flowing through her veins as well."

Dom looked at Kel's face. Her skin was pallid but for two rough patches of pink in her cheeks. He looked at her flustered. There was the biggest smile on her face he had ever seen, but something screamed wrong. He wanted to tell her not to waist her emotions now so she'd have them later when she was fully sane. So she'd have them when they were real. "Maybe you should try to sleep a bit Kel." He suggested. "Sounds like you've got a lot going on."

"But I want to read my reports." She whined, sounding for a moment like Neal. "I think you need to sleep. You're the one who just came back from the road yesterday. Traveling then a fight. You must be the tired one."

"But don't you like me Kel?" He grinned. "Why would you wish for me to be gone?"

"I don't want you gone!" He flinched at the volume of her voice, but it sounded perfectly fine in Kel's own ears. Then again, the rush of blood going to her head felt right as well. "I never ever want you to leave. I want you to stay here forever. Yes, I do like you…I just don't know why anymore."

Dom frowned at her along with the others. "What do you mean?"

Kel giggled a sound too shrill to belong to her. "I don't know what I think about anything anymore." She propped herself up on her elbows shakily. "You could remind me."

By the glint in her eyes Dom had a pretty good guess what she meant. Tempt choked him as a fire lit his cheek bones, coloring his face brightly. He glanced at Neal from the corner of his eye to see his cousin looking at him with his brow furrowed, but he had his hand raised to cover his grin. The blonde male centaur wasn't bothering to hide his amusement and chuckled loudly. Dom glared at him before looking back to Kel.

"I think its better you get some sleep." He advised, eyes flicking to Neal then back to Kel.

She smiled at him sweetly, a natural smile, and something inside Dom cracked. It took him a moment to realize it was his knee grinding against the bone as they suddenly went slack. It was impossible for him to go unaffected by her. "You have the right to your opinion." She cooed. Her eyes were out of focus and the green a little too dull. "And I have the right to think you're stupid."

"I thought you liked me."

"I do," she was grinning boldly now, "but that doesn't make you any less stupid."

"You know your mean when you don't know what you're talking about." Dom was rewarded with a laugh and smiled back at her. Well, he could make her laugh. He couldn't stop her from hurting herself, but he wasn't a totally useless thing.

A green tinge crawled up into her ashen and almost colorless face and Kel slacked back on her elbows. "Ow."

"I knew there'd be a crash soon." Neal said, getting up. He gently pressed her back into the bed. "Dom's right, kinda. You should probably let your body do what it wants and sleep."

Kel groaned in protest but her eyes fell shut. Her body seemed to stop functioning suddenly and she lapsed out. Dom sucked his lips together looking at her. It wasn't right for her to be completely still. Normally she turned in her sleep, muttering on occasion, and tangling herself in the sheets. Now she was perfectly still.

"She's doing better then the last time I saw her." He muttered to no one in particular. Seeing her that first time had been almost unbearable. Kel was good at hiding things, but he could see the pain in her eyes. Her face had been completely red then, the fire that was burning inside of her licking at her from under her flesh. It was easier looking at her now when there were no tubes in her mouth or needles pushed under her skin, but before he had to keep telling himself warriors got hurt. Kel would make it through. "I can understand her better, at least."

"She's lucky to be alive." Dom looked to Neal, hearing the new quiver in his voice. Neal was slack in his seat, his face the same colorless as Kel's. Now that his friend was asleep he let down his own mask. "Her ribs pushed in on her lungs. She was choking on her own blood for a while. If that second blow had cut her skin, if she would have gotten anymore poison in her system, Kel would have died. We had to clear her lungs and tape her before going on when we found out they were flooding. By the time Bena got the toxin in her she was in mid fever." He jerked his head to Kel. "Feel her."

Dom's brow furrowed and he moved forward, pressing his palm to Kel's forehead. It was cool, chilly even. The temperature matched the color of her skin. Not a fever, far from a fever.

"The toxins did that." Neal said, guessing what his cousin was thinking. "They burned her, I know they did because she cringed, but she got a chill. Started shivering all over."

Dom swallowed hard. "Will she be alright?"

"Now, probably." Bena's strident voice answered. "The tonic is washing out her system now. Should be done soon. Her body'll hurt in the morning, but it'll be like the poison never touched her."

Dom looked at Kel, still on the cot. Her leg was braced loosely, her arm in a sling that rested across her chest. She didn't seem like she would forget this soon. Maybe the poison was gone, but that was only half of it.

Without looking over his shoulder Dom carefully moved in the little space there was on the bed, wedging himself so his back was leaning against the wall and his side clipping into the bedside table. He laced his fingers with Kel's, looking down at her. He heard one of the centaurs snort and stomp, but ignored it.

"She'll be fine." Neal assured and Dom nodded curtly, not wanting to hear them. He didn't need their comforting words. All he needed was to see the colors in Kel's eyes again.

It was dark still when Kel's eyes fluttered open. The infirmary was on the verge of clean, fewer herbs scattered on the floor, and mostly empty. "Go back to sleep." A voice whispered from above her. "At least for a few hours."

But that wasn't a voice that should tell her to relax. It was almost physically impossible to do so when she was around him. Looking up Kel blinked at Dom. She felt his fingers squeeze hers and looked at their joined hands before returning to his lovely face again. Shadowed in the dark she couldn't see the bruises under his eyes, much to Dom's relief.

Kel raised her brows, causing her head to spike in pain. "Did they run out of beds?" she asked, scooting over to give him more room.

"No, but this one has always been my favorite and you were already accommodating it. I figured you wouldn't mind." His teeth flashed in the dark.

Kel pointed to an empty bed a few rows down from them. It was the same one she had seen him laying in when she brought him in after staying out in the cold that night. "What about that one?"

Dom scowled at the bed, the memory coming back. "I rather like this one better."

Kel shrugged, finding that it was a bit difficult. "How are you feeling?" Dom asked tentatively. "Neal said it was…a close call."

"Neal over exaggerates." Kel waved it off. "But, I can honestly say I have never ever felt this way. My veins feel empty. It's weird. And my bones feel light like wood."

"Maybe the toxins burned away a little of your body fat." He poked her stomach, pushing up her shirt a little to twirl his finger in her belly button. "Hmm…maybe."

Kel coughed, tasting copper but not as strongly as before. "Then he and Benny can make a fortune off of this. Court ladies will pay pounds of gold for this torture of a weight loss miracle."

Dom gave a sad half smile, lifting his hand to trace the yellow skin around her still sallow lips. "I doubt it. Kel, you look _terrible_."

She scowled at him. "How kind of you to say so. I was starting to think you didn't notice." He chuckled and she gave a smile of her own. "Then they can just sell it for what it is. People could either suffer through wyvern poison, or this. I say they're both even, but that's just me."

"You smile like you're so tough." He teased, then sighed. "The scary thing is that you are."

"Nah, I'm just stupid." Kel said, hiding a flattered blush. "First time I was hit I was too busy paying attention to something else rather then the fight. Then I didn't step back and rest when I felt the stinging, the poison, in my shoulder. When the other wyvern was coming up I heard the screaming, but I didn't think anything of it. That earned me a fractured fibula and a snapped collarbone."

Dom nodded, his face lightheartedly solemn. "You're a danger to yourself and should be stopped. Starting tomorrow I will not have you leave your room or office. Neither will you touch your sword again. Pointy objects seem to be your sore spot recently." His face softened. "But really, I never want you to think you're anything less then amazing."

Kel smirked at him. "Oh really?" She shook her head. "How about starting now I read my reports." She saw Dom wrinkle his nose. "No, no complaining. I've been trying to do this all day but every one who shares a blood line with you has been stopping me."

"You know," he said, lifting the papers from the table next to him. He held them away from her so she couldn't reach them and fanned himself. "There's this great little tool that the gods gave us, and that's this little switch in your head that just goes, 'mmmmmfuckit.' Mine just got stuck this morning. Well, now I guess it was yesterday morning. You should try it some time. It really-Mithros Kel!" He nursed his bruised arm. "Why must you hit so hard?"

"My self control slipped." She muttered, taking the papers from him before he could think to move them away further. "Now, hush."

"No," he pouted and she almost laughed. "I want to know why you had to hit me."

"I'm just hard core like that, now shush. You're going to wake someone up."

"You already have." A soft voice muttered, on the edge of sleep.

Kel glared at Dom. "Sorry," she muttered and poked Dom. "Be quiet."

He raised his hands in a defensive position. "Some gratitude for sticking around to make sure you lived through the night."

Kel looked down at the papers in her hands, squinting in the shallow light provided by the waning moon. "I intend to live forever." She muttered as she read. She pinched his hand, making him wince. "So far so good."

She read for a while more, her brow furrowing in confusion. "What?" she whispered to herself. She felt Dom's grip tighten around her and tried not to wince. He must have felt her tense because his grip went slack. "Wait," she murmured when he took a breath to say something. She read further into the letter, flipping to the next page.

"You're _killing_ me here Kel." He whispered back after a long silent moment. "I'll be dead by the time you finish reading."

"You're close to death already." She muttered, a smile tugging her lip to make it crack.

"Kel," he growled.

Kel sighed. "Fine," she passed him the letter. "The king is sending Numair. He didn't write news or anything, just that. He wants Numair to look over the area where we're finding most of the Manticore and immortals." She picked up Wyldon's letter and read. It wasn't much better and she set it aside. "Six days. He'll be here in six days." She leaned back, resting lightly against Dom's arm. "I'm not sure about how I feel with having him here away from Daine and their baby."

"Daine has the whole castle at her dispense, including Duke Baird and the rest of the healers in the infirmary. She'll be fine if anything happens."

Kel shook her head vigorously. "It's not that. She won't go into labor now. It's just that I don't like to think that he's here when he could be there. You know? I'm not sure if there is anything here that will help with this immortal manticore thing." She sighed, feeling silly. "How would you feel? Being separated from the one you loved."

His mouth twitched and Dom tried a smile. It was brittle on his face and not worth the effort he put behind it to keep it in place. "Like you and Cleon during the progress?" He smiled smugly when she tilted her head up to look at him. "Don't think I didn't notice."

"I think this is a little different." There was coldness in her voice. It wasn't bitter, but a little annoyed like what he was talking about had no relation to the topic. "Daine and Numair love each other."

Dom bit the inside of his lip and nodded. "So I'm guessing-" She nodded. "I just thought-"

"Dom," his brows came down at the tone in her voice. She sounded almost amused and tired. "I'm not the type for love…not really." She was smiling, at herself he guessed. "I've been fickle since I was young. Crushes, things like that, but not love." If she thought she sounded silly before, now Kel was being ridiculous. "I don't want to ruin this for them."

Dom looked at her a little surprised. "Kel, it's his job. It has nothing to do with you. The king is the one separating them."

Kel sighed, wanting to change the subject. Cold air dragged slowly into her lungs, sharply going down her raw throat. "Yeah, I know." She said as she exhaled, her voice tight.

Dom let the silence between them hang for a long while, thinking over what she had said. It didn't sound right. Kel fickle? That just was the complete opposite of her. There was no one as stable as Kel. No one as rooted.

He decided to break the mute that stretched between them. "I don't understand what you meant before. When you said I was close to death. Do you plan on killing me?"

She moved her arm that was out of the sling and ran his nails down her arm lightly, leaving behind fine white lines. Gently Dom wrapped his arm around her, careful of her shoulder and ribs. "I simply meant you're an old man." He heard a yawn in her voice and smiled though she wasn't giving him a complement. "You're closer then me."

"By six years."

"Six…long extensive years." She said, turning her head and smiling into his arm. "Catching up on Raoul."

"You're nice today." Dom muttered as she began to relax and slip further under the sheets. "First you call me stupid, then you hit me, and now you're calling me old. Why so mean?" He looked down to see her eyes were lidded, closed completely. He hadn't been able to see their color in the dark, but he knew it was still there.

"Because, Dom, I'm a girl. It's what we do."

"And you do it well," he muttered, but Kel missed it as she fell back to sleep. He sighed and pulled his arm back. He had killed himself staying up so late. He needed to get back to his own bed, though, he was tempted to stay. The infirmary needed bigger beds.

The air was chilly outside once Dom had stepped out of the door way, and he felt a shadow follow him into the dully lit camp. Soft foot falls made him pause his own walking to let his follower catch up.

"If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it." Neal said as he passed by his cousin. Dom fell into stride with him, headed to the Own's quarters. "Nearly alone, the closest you'll get to it with her, in the dark. She whispers how she has never loved another in her life, telling you she was incapable, and what do you do? Rather then saying you could change all that you ask her if she wants you dead."

"Kel isn't incapable of loving and she never said that. You were listening?" Dom asked, bristling.

"Did you ever see me leave my office earlier?" Dom thought, and bared his teeth realizing Neal had never left. His cousin laughed. "Every word including the 'I never want you to think you're anything less then amazing'." Neal mimicked Dom's voice, making it too high. Dom punched his shoulder, grinning despite himself. It was odd how he changed around Kel.

Neal glared at him and dusted off his shoulder like a bird landed there. "Kel may have never said she was incapable, but she thinks it. Listen to her voice when she talks, idiot. Not just the words."

"So, you're helping me now?"

"Nope." Neal changed his direction and strolled away from his cousin. "I just wanted to taunt you. Never really get the chance much anymore." He called over his shoulder as he blended in with a shadow.

Dom gritted his teeth together before continuing to his bed.

Kel wasn't allowed out of the infirmary for another four days. It didn't matter really. There wasn't much for her to do outside her bed that she could do without standing. There she slept, listened to verbal reports, and read the written ones. New Hope had sustained a few damages as a wyvern got past the archers and took out a few lodges before being put to rest. Merric was in charge of the physical duties for leading New Hope and reported to her nightly, telling her of the structures being rebuilt.

He was good, telling her almost every detail about the process, but Kel's brow still creased in concern. She didn't like being bed ridden and when the camp was in the aftermath of an attack. Every time she would try to get up she was pressed back down to the bed.

"Kel, really." Merric sighed when she pushed herself upright when he walked in. "Just hang still for a while longer. One more night of this and Neal says you can get up again. It's only been four days."

Kel stayed up as long as she could before falling back on her pillow. "That's easy for you to say." She muttered to the ceiling. "You get to stand on your own two feet without trouble."

He cocked one pale golden brow. "For now, but I've had my moments." A smile pulled at her lips briefly as she remembered. Merric sat on the edge of her bed a little awkwardly and pulled his legs up, crossing them. "And you only have to sleep till tomorrow morning. Then you can run around and break your legs all over again." He smiled.

Kel nodded with a sigh. "That is only if Neal comes for his silly final healing before the sun sets again." She glanced to her open window to see the setting sun. "Thanks." She said without looking at him.

Merric told her of the progress and said goodnight before shutting her door behind him. Kel bit her lip and drummed her fingers while she thought. His report was shorter then the usual ones. Building was going swiftly and easily with little accidents. If they didn't get any snow they could be finished in a week or so.

Constantly Kel stole glances at the bag of tea that was set on her night stand. Her mind was whirling with thought. What were they finding out at the university? What did Wyldon wanted her to do about the immortals? What was happening with the immortals?

She thought of Bena's words when she gave her the sack. '_It makes your body as good as immobile for six hours. You won't move or dream or think. Nothing but rest.'_

Rest at that moment seemed like a luxury. Kel may have to lie in bed all day, getting up only to use the privy or change, but her muscles never relaxed. Neal kept reminding her that he had New Hope watched. That Merric was doing a wonderful job and she needed to sleep, but Kel couldn't. Every time she closed her lids she thought of something else, something wrong that could happen. It was driving her crazy and she knew she was doing it to herself, but there was nothing for it.

Nothing but being able to be a nonentity. One cup would allow her to be nobody. To have no thoughts. Her fingers burned and twitched with desire, but she held it back. Non-existence was one option, or she could just wait till the sun was fully set to have her preferred and safer drug.

She watched as bands of gold and copper turned bronze then red. Slowly the color faded to a dull pink that was washed away by a dark blue. The atmosphere thickened with stars that winked and shimmered as they fell. The dark blue grew stronger till it was black.

Bodies moved back and forth on the walls, on patrols. Looking at the sky again Kel made a mental note to sign up for night watch when she was able. The February sky was devastating in its beauty.

Kel heard her door slide open but didn't look away from the sky. "Are you asleep?" A whisper just barely crawled to her ear before dying. Kel turned her head to look at Dom. The door was partly open behind him, ready for him to exit through. Seeing her move a grin spread over his face and he kicked it shut the rest of the way.

"I still think your being silly." She muttered as Dom pulled off his boots. "You have to stay up late to even get in here discreetly and leave early so Neal won't catch you. You're going to fall over tomorrow and it'll be all my fault."

"But I want to be here." He assured her, wigging out of his tunic. "I'm tired of sleeping with a pillow clutched to my chest."

Kel's hands began to shake a little, but she hid them under the blankets. "I won't be able to do anything _fun_ tonight." She reminded him. "Neal put some stupid leaf Bena gave him in my tea and I get dizzy if I sit up." She hated Neal. She made another note to kill him when she could stand again.

Dom flashed her a smile as he climbed next to her. Softly he pecked her on the cheek before curling around her under the blankets. "Well, I'm here for now and I'm here for you…that's enough."

Those words let Kel's mind drift into an actual restful state. When she opened her eyes again the next morning she sucked in a surprised breath. The presence at her side was gone along with the blue eyes, but emerald spheres looked down at her. Suddenly the resemblance between Dom and Neal shown bright and Kel stopped breathing. Looking at Neal's face felt so wrong. His being there wasn't right at all.

"Forget about me?" He asked, leaning back. Kel looked around quickly and saw that all traces of Dom were gone. Neal wasn't paying attention to her search. "Sit up. Five more minutes and you can kick me as freely as I know you want to."

"I don't want to kick you I want to kill you." She muttered as he pulled the blankets off of her. For a moment she froze as he frowned at her bed.

"Have you been tossing in your sleep?" He asked, gesturing to the wrinkles in the sheet next to her and the corner where the cover was pulled down. Dom must have been in a hurry.

Kel looked at him with a smooth face. "Are you stalling? Come on Neal, I want out of here!"

He grinned at her, "Fine, fine," and put him hands on her wounded leg. Kel hated slow healing but Neal had insisted on it. Feeling slowly came to and she couldn't suppress the anxiety. When Neal let her go again she was pulling herself from the bed, pushing past him. "Slow down Kel. It's barely seven in the morning. What could there possibly be to do?"

"Building," she called shortly from her dressing room as she tugged on breeches and tunic. She stumbled as she came out putting on her boots.

"Kel, I don't think they'll need your help." She ignored him and left Neal in her room as she trotted down the hall, getting used to the feeling again. "Kel!" Neal called again and swore. Quickly he locked her door and followed after her. "At least eat something first. You just had a healing!"

As much as she detested it Neal was right. In the end she passed the building site and went to the mess with him. "Cheer up." He commanded as he loaded his plate. "You're out of bed at least."

Kel glowered at him as she fought her stomach and lids. "There's still little I can do."

He grinned at her knowingly and when Kel fell asleep on the table next to her food he had her sent back to her rooms. He enlisted Faleron's help getting her there.

"You know she's just going to be angrier when she wakes up." Faleron muttered as Neal opened Kel's door. He carried Kel's latent form through the frame and waited for Neal to pull down her covers before laying her down.

Neal shrugged. "It's not my fault she responds that way to healing. Some people can take it better some worse." Faleron gave him a look. "Oh, come off it Fal. Do you want her to get better?"

"Yes, but I would rather not have her try to kill you when there are so many witnesses." He smirked at Neal. "Though, I'm sure the punishments wouldn't be as dire since you'd be the victim, Meathead."

Neal gawked at him friend. "That's it! No one is allowed to ever call me that name again!" He shouted then quickly looked at Kel. She turned on her side. "Gods," he snorted. "That girl sleeps like the dead." Looking to Faleron who was still smirking he pushed the man out, following him.

Kel woke the next morning to light shining in her eyes. "Sakuyo laughs!" she snapped, sitting up right. She didn't even waste time rubbing the sleep from her eyes before she got dressed and ready. Glancing out her window she growled, it was already on its way to being noon. Why hadn't anybody wakened her?

First thing Kel thought to do was check the damage on the parapet. There were a few, some split beams where a wyvern had crashed, but not many. Still they were a weak spot and if hit hard enough would put a hole in their defenses. She'd need to write to Lord Wyldon to send more wood if they hadn't enough in storage. It was that or risk having her men attacked while out chopping wood.

Majority of the mess was cleaned away and Kel frowned. It was hard looking at the affects of hard work when she wasn't involved and knew others had worked harder because of that.

She circled the wall, looking over New Hope from above. Not many places were taken out during the attack, but she saw the ones that had been were torn down completely and started form scratch. Frames had already rose from the ground just like Merric had described and paneling was being added.

"Interesting how fears as simple as heights can be washed away," a voice behind her muttered. Kel turned halfway before spinning around completely. "I heard you had an interesting encounter with a new kind of curative."

Kel looked up into Numair Salmalin's dark eyes. She took a step back and bowed a gesture to which he returned. "Master Numair," she straightened, "I didn't know you had arrived."

He grinned. "You were sleeping. I didn't want to disturb you with my presence." Oh, she was so going to get Neal for not telling her.

"She wouldn't be the first you've disturbed." A joking voice came from behind the tall man. "He's rude isn't he? Hasn't even made introductions yet and I've been standing here for, oh, five seconds. What would mother think?"

Numair's jaw tilted. "I was getting to that." He assured. He looked at Kel a bit sheepishly. "Harailt of Aili called me to the university to meet him in his office before I left for the road. Really, he didn't give me an option-"

"See what I mean by rude?" Kel looked flustered as a redheaded man came to Numair's side. He was tall, lean and maybe half an inch shorter then Numair. Dark lashes shielded his green eyes from the wind that was tugging loose snow around them. He flashed her a grin, one very familiar. "He makes it sound as though I'm not wanted."

"You're not," Numair grumbled, meaning for only the other man to hear but it reached Kel's ears. "What were the rules I told you about?"

The man laughed, still smiling. "The lady can hear you Numair." He held his hand out to Kel, taking hers and brushing it with his lips like a court lady's. "You're a friend of my mother. It's nice to finally meet you Keladry."

Kel was confused and looked to Numair. He sighed. "I'm sorry for his behavior. He's his father's child." The redheaded man grinned wider. Numair put a hand on his shoulder. "The Lioness's son, Thom of Pirates Swoop."


	17. Chapter 16

Sigh…hello out there little computer world

**Sigh…hello out there little computer world. I cave people, I truly do. I'm not the sort of person who likes to take help, but if any one wants to be my beta tell me. I have no idea how you become a beta or whatever so you'll have to kind of tell me.**

**And Yes, I know how silly the title is.**

Ducky and a Broom Closet

"My teachers want me to get some field work before they let me get any further in my studies." Kel looked up at the tall young man, still a bit flustered over the fact that she had to. Not many people were that much taller then her. He looked back at her with eyes almost the same color as hers and grinned the same smile she had seen on Alanna's husband and Thom's father when he attended any of the palace parties that the Lioness was forced into. "I'm taking it as it is and coming here isn't the worse place to go. At the moment it's probably the best with this new manticore thing and your connections with the centaur herd. I know a few of my friends in the capital were ready to throw their tomes at my head when they found out Harailt wanted me here with Numair. They won't let any of the student's touch the corpses you sent, but I don't think Numair will mind if I take a look at one while we're here."

Kel leaned further into the barricade that surrounded the edge of the parapet. She had learned over the past two hours that talking with Thom was fun and much like talking to Neal. He would snap in and out of a scholarly daze, making jokes one moment then pelting her with a million thoughtful questions. At times it made the conversation a little overwhelming.

Kel looked away from him and out at the frozen grounds beyond New Hope. "I'm sure he wouldn't, Numair is a reasonable man and it would be pointless to let the bodies go to waste. Every hunt we go on it seems like we end up with at least five of them attacking us."

"And when is your next hunt?" Thom asked enthusiastically. "And when will you be seeing the herd again? I'd like to meet them." She glanced at him and saw he was smirking slightly. "You'd think by now I'd get tired of this stuff. When I was ten I had a friend that was a _dragon_. My mother's the Kings Champion and I've grown up with some of the most influential power heads in the realm. I've been helping as a healer since I was six and warrior mage since I was fourteen. And yet I still never get enough of this."

"What do _you_ think is going on with these immortals?" Kel asked. Thom's opinion seemed important at the moment. Like he said he did have a lot of experience with magic and immortals. Plus he had Numair around to explain more thoroughly to him. "Why do you think all these new ones just showed up suddenly and there are more of the older ones? They can't all be coming from Scanra."

Thom's thin lips twitched in thought. After a while of silence Kel thought he hadn't heard her when he spoke. "The gods took a few back into the realms before it was sealed." Thom said as he leaned against the barricade next to her. She looked at him as he watched the edge of the woods with his hands clasped before him. "Not all of them were gone though, as you know. Spidrens, stormwings, tauros', ogres, centaurs and the like, but the wyverns and other were sent back. Now," he tapped his thumb on the top of his hand. "The way I see it is they might have only agreed to keep them in the Divine Realms for so long. Gods are tricky and can put double and triple spins on their word and promises. They may have taken the immortals away for a while, but they could have them return whenever they liked."

"But why?" Kel asked, confused. "Why would they plague us with these problems? Has Tortall offended the gods?"

Thom chuckled. "I don't think it's a hard job to offend the gods, but I think they have other reasons."

Kel frowned. "And?"

"And," he continued, "I think they may have sent the immortals here for our own good."

Kel's spine snapped straight in surprise and Thom had to steady her so she wouldn't fall. "What?" She looked up into Thom's laughing face disbelievingly. "Our own good?"

"Yes, our own good." He repeated as they settled against the wall again. Kel watched him from the corner of her eye, looking for signs he might truly be insane. Thom ignored the look. "It makes sense to me. Tortall isn't the only realm with immortals showing up suddenly. The Copper Isles have reports of sea creatures in their waters as well as the Yamani's. Scanra has plenty still even with their flow coming into us. It is my opinion that they sent them here for good reason. Tortall has gone from one war to another in around eight years. That isn't much time considering, and the chances of us going into another war with Scanran and Carthak rebels once this main battle is over is very, very likely."

Kel sighed when he paused. "And?" She prompted him again. "I still see no reason."

Thom looked at her amused. "Give the silly humans something to distract themselves with on the home front and they'll leave their equally silly neighbors alone. Really, it's quite simple. If Tortall focuses on their immortal problems and the problems inside their borders they won't have the chance to start any wars. Same goes for Scanra and all the other realms. Some, such as the Copper Isles and Yaman are less involved. The Isles at the moment are in no condition to create a war when they are brewing one up with themselves and the Yamani's are making peace with their enemies rather then trying to take their lands, bless their gentle hearts for that." Kel laughed. "Now, having the immortals around doesn't change a lot of things. It only makes having a war a little bit more difficult."

Kel thought it over. He was right; having the immortals out did make running the camp a tad bit more difficult and raiders must have been having a hard time getting past the creatures seeing as they hadn't attacked for a long while. She sighed and propped herself up on her elbows. "Maybe," she granted him.

Thom shrugged. "It's a theory. Not a complete one, but a theory."

A muffled shout came from inside the camp walls and Kel frown. Glancing to Thom she saw him go over to the other side of the parapet and look down curiously. A bright smile lit his face and Kel moved to see what he was looking at. Neal was standing at the foot of the wall, waving his arms up at them.

"Ducky!" he called. "Bring Mother down with you and get some food. The Own will have a squad coming in soon and they eat like pigs. If you don't hurry up it'll be all gone."

Thom glanced to Kel and raised a brow. "Mother?" He snickered and she scowled at him.

"Ducky?" She shot back. "At least my stupid nickname makes some sense. Neal must be loosing his touch."

Thom sighed as they headed to the stairs. "My mother calls me Duckling still. Started calling me it when I was three and hasn't stopped, cursed woman."

Kel thought back to how Thom had latched onto her even after Numair had left to speak with Raoul. "Aw, now it's making sense. It suits you."

Thom grumbled. "If you weren't a girl I'd hit you for that."

"I'm not a girl, I'm a commander." Kel retorted as they reached the bottom of the stairs.

"A female commander, if I remember correctly." Kel looked up to see that Neal hadn't been alone. Faleron, Merric, Dom and Wolset were at the bottom of the stairs. Wolset grinned at her. "A big, tall, powerful female commander."

"Oh, shut up Wolset." Kel said once they reached the group of collected men and headed to the mess. She grinned wickedly at him. "Remember, I'm bigger then you."

"Everyone's bigger then Wolset," Dom retorted. The group snickered at the reddening man as they made their way through the camp.

"So, Numair said you got a special kind of healing for your wyvern wounds." Thom said as they reached the mess. It was the first in a long time Kel sat at the head table. Thom was seated next to her as a guest and Merric on her left. Neal sat next to him while the mess slowly filed. Thom was looking at Kel now, his body turned from his meal. "How so?"

Kel shrugged. "I wouldn't call it special, just different."

"We used almost completely botanical medicine on her." Neal informed him, hearing them Over Merric's shoulder. "Most of the healing was done with whole plants and their extracts. We used a little healing on her leg and collarbone for the bones, but the internal bleeding and poison was stopped by Bena. She's a little centaur girl with a knack for herbs."

Thom looked at Neal. "Oh?"

Kel sat and ate her food quietly as she tried to pull meaning out of the two men's words. She got lost every few seconds when they threw her off with a word she had never learned before. Aromatic, phenols, tannins, alkaloids, phytoalexins. Her head began to spin as they chattered back and forth over uses and things they had learned. She skipped between snippets of conversation as she filled her stomach. "…using the plant hormone ethylene…kill invading cells…deploys superoxide…glucose moiety attached to an aglycone…." They both shared back and forth, but Kel never listened long enough to get the whole sentence and the words loss their meaning.

"Did her heart take any damage?" Thom asked, his words finally coming out sensible. "It must have been working over time to get her thickened blood to her cells. How did you get it to stop from convulsing too much?"

"Valerian. Bena mixed it in with her tonic last minute when she saw Kel was getting too close to a cardiac arrest. Valerian helps with nervous disorders and can ease hypertension. The herbs she has are about ten times stronger then any I've ever used and Kel's heart went back to normal in less then a minute."

Thom frowned and looked to Kel. "Do you mind?" He asked, holding out a glittering hand.

Kel looked at it for a moment, reluctant to let him touch her with any kind of magic. She wasn't a fan of the results of magic on her, but it was already winding down to the end of the day. It wouldn't be a bad thing for her to get a little boost to put her to sleep.

Kel shrugged and let him take her forearm. "Go ahead; just don't mess around in there too much."

"Don't worry. I'm just going to probe around a bit to see what the damage was." Thom assured her as a pale leaf color spread up Kel's arm. It was warm and tickled over her skin making her shudder. Thom pushed forward and she felt as it flicked around in her chest, tickling as it roamed up and down her throat.

She sighed as the green magic slipped from her, but frowned when she saw Thom's face. He was frowning as well, his brow furrowed as he looked at her. "Odd," he muttered.

"What?" Neal pestered him. "Come on; inform us of your little find. She's alright isn't she?" His voice tweaked up with a little panic. "I thought she was fine. She seemed healthy when I probed her the other day."

"No, no she's fine." Thom said. He leaned forward and took a grip of Kel's shoulders, pressing his ear to her heart. Kel froze under him, arms lifting to push him back but not touching him. He was muttering under his breath, counting down her heart beats. He pulled back and grabbed her wrist, feeling her pulse. "Her heart is stronger." He whispered to himself.

"What?" Neal was on the edge of his seat, prepared to pull the man from his friend. "What are you doing?"

"I'm just checking her heart." He assured Neal and started counting down her heart beats again. "It's almost like the tonic strengthened her heart muscles." Thom balled his hand into a fist and lifted it so Kel could see clearly. "Here," he ran his fingers over one side of his curled hand then another, "and here. That's about where you're right and left ventricle are. Do you know what that is?" Kel nodded slowly, trying to remember back to her training. Lindhall Reed had taught them biology and had mentioned something about the heart, but she only could remember the main arteries. Thom didn't seem to notice her slight confusion. "The muscles covering them are tougher then usual. Still flexible to allow it to beat freely, but strong. Seems like a large horses heart more then a humans."

"I don't know if that is a compliment or insult." Kel muttered and tugged back her arm that he was still holding in his other hand.

Thom grinned at her, letting both his hands fall into his lap. "Sorry, it was just an observation. No insult intended."

"Yeah, yeah," Neal muttered, pulling Thom's attention back to him. "Now…."

Kel picked up her tray and left to empty it with a muttered goodnight, sensing that what her friend had to say would consist of even larger words she wouldn't be able to put together. Merric didn't seem to want to listen either and took his tray, moving over to sit with the Own where his cousin had chosen to sit.

Dom saw Kel leaving and gave Merric his spot, going after her. "Hey," he panted, catching up with her. "How you feeling?"

"I'm as healthy as a horse." She snorted. "Really, I'm fine." Glancing at him from the corner of her eye she could see the slumped shoulders and his uneven steps. "Are you alright Dom?"

"Yeah," he said but it wasn't very comforting. He rubbed the back of his neck and turned his head, making his neck crack. He winced at the sound. "I just slept funny last night."

Kel frowned. "You slept in your bed didn't you? You should have been comfortable with all the space."

Dom thought back to the night before. He had completely rolled of his bed without Kel there to keep a hold on. Waking up on the floor that morning with a knot in his neck was not enjoyable in the least. He was becoming too used to waking up to warmth at his side. To a stable pillow that never slipped from under him and something to hold onto. Just the promise of her comfort made Dom grab Kel's hand and start to trot, tugging her behind him.

"Dom." Kel tried to say as he pulled her along. Her voice was uneven as he changed his direction abruptly. She tried to get her feet more securely under her, but every time she did he would throw her off again making people look after them curiously. "Dom slow down."

"Can't," he puffed, clouding the air with his breath. Kel looked up at him oddly, trying to make it so she could straighten up completely but he tugged her more fiercely forward.

She grunted. "Dom, at least tell me what's wrong!"

"Can't. Run faster."

They ran against the parapet and Kel looked around, trying to see where he wanted to go or even if there was a place they were headed. The sky was just turning that shade between purple and pink, inching its way closer and closer to twilight. The quarter moon was carving its way into the sky but still a distant glowing sketch. People were still shuffling through the snow going back and forth carrying water or just walking before going in for the night.

Kel looked up as they passed into a shadow and finally saw where they were headed. A dark area was created in the corner of the parapet where a small overhead went over the edge of the wall, making it a few feet wider. Kel didn't expect the little alcove that led down a small flight of wooden stairs. Building New Hope she hadn't seen the little extension and guessed it was added on from a mistake turned into something useful when the wall was put up.

The room was freezing, being dug partly into the icy ground, and wooden. Her feet scrapped over the dirt floor as she squinted around in the dark. The light was completely blotted out now, not just shadowed.

"Mysterious, dark room. Being dragged away against my will with no one I love knowing." Kel muttered as she looked around. Feeling against the wall she felt broom poles and other cleaning tools. She back up into the center of the room again when she hit a bale of hay pressed into the corner. "Are you planning to kill me Dom?"

"Killing would be much too quick." He muttered, his voice louder then she had expected. She jumped, turning around to bump into him. Dom caught her, steadying her with his hands on her shoulders. His hands slipped down to her elbows. "Slow and tender is better then hot and fast."

Kissing Dom there in the darkness was like nothing else. An emotion rocketed through her and her throat scorched with the feeling. Blood went screaming to her head as her heart beat its way out of her chest. The feeling swirling in her veins was indescribable by anything earthly. It could only be described by something so physically impossible it was ridiculous like swallowing a star or sliding down a rainbow.

Then again, kissing Dom had always seemed impossible. He couldn't be attracted to her. It was a law of science somehow. There was a castle full of unscarred, clean, well bred women that he could choose to wed or court. Not that what they were doing was in any way courting, but it no longer seemed to be just for her nightmares. In fact her nightmares seemed to be shoved aside by the sudden increase in activity happening to her as well as the camp. Once and a while she was able to remember a few after they happened, but they were beginning to blur into nothing.

What had been happening between her and her friend, what was happening at that very moment as Dom drew her to sit across him as he sat back on the turned over hay bale, was something completely different then their deal. Sure, she relaxed into his hold and leaned into his mouth like always, but it was different. There were no dreams to banish away, no memories to forget. There was nothing but Dom, his hands, and her nerves.

So, maybe he needs this too? Kel thought it as a question, feeling the hunger behind Dom's lips grow and his grip around her tighten. It made sense in a way. There weren't many girls around when a solider got lonely, and dealing with the refugees would be a hard hand. Only one or two of the men dared to bed a girl in a village or camp, because being so far from Corus none of them had the charms. No one had to leave the Third from a pregnancy scare, but it could happen.

With her Dom was safe. With her he hadn't the need to go through nights lonely or in the cold. In a way she was both disgusted by the thought and relieved. They would be even. He would be doing her a favor and she'd be returning it.

The cold air stung at her skin, making her hair stand on end. Dom's hands moved under her shirt, cupping her stomach warmly. She shivered at the contrast and curled into him further, not even thinking about the fact that she was sitting on his lap like a bar trollop or the fact that anyone could walk in on them. She concentrated on the feeling as it rose again. Concentrated on Dom as his teeth grazed her lower lip before he pulled back completely to rest his head on her shoulder.

Dom wrinkled his nose as the smell that was stuck in her shirt. The bitter electric scent of magic clung to her and a growl began to brew in his neck, remembering where it had come from.

"That was some move the Lioness's son pulled on you." He tried to say nonchalantly as he toyed with her growing hair. In a way to relieve himself of his annoyance Dom bit her neck lightly but still hard enough that there'd be a mark in the morning. Kel shivered against him as he pressed his long nose against her cheek, kissing her along the jaw line hungrily. "I guess I can't blame the kid for jumping on you, but he should have at least waited a day or so. Guess you won't need me for this anymore."

"Thom was just probing me to see what Bena and Neal did. He got a little…excited and forgot for a second he was sitting in front of the camp and not in a classroom." Kel murmured, barely registering what he was saying as his teeth nibbled at her skin again.

Dom ducked his head further, hiding his face in her chest shamelessly. "I don't think it would be appropriate for him to press himself on you in any other place, especially in a classroom."

His lips tasted like salt from the brush of her bare flesh. It was almost mind numbing, making him forget his job outside the small room. He tasted her along her neck, sinking his teeth in her skin every once and awhile.

He groaned in protest when Kel pulled back. He held her as long as possible till she pulled away from him completely. "What's wrong?" he asked, trying not to whine.

"We're in a _broom closet_, Dom."

"So?" He stood, wrapping his arms around her waist and topping her head with his chin. He rocked them back and forth, like they were dancing. "No one comes here when the ground is frozen. It gets too cold."

Kel shivered. "That's not what I meant. I know no one's going to see. It's just…."

"Yes Commander?" Dom prodded when Kel didn't continue.

She sighed, letting her head rest on his shoulder. It was becoming too heavy to hold up in the first place. "I don't know. It doesn't feel _right_."

Dom pulled back instantly and held Kel by her shoulders as she teetered forward. "This doesn't feel right _here_, or with me?" Dom asked, concerned that he had pushed too hard for once. It was only expected. For weeks he had been tugging on her boundaries, pushing them closer and closer to her. It was only a matter of time till he actually stepped over the line.

"No." Kel shook her head quickly. "It's just…I don't know. This doesn't feel right. Not you or…here or anything really." She chewed on her lip, trying to find out what she wanted to say. "This, what we're doing, just feels wrong. Hiding in places then walking around ten minutes later like nothing just happened. Keeping things from Neal and the refugees-"

"Are you suggesting we tell them?" Dom asked, actually liking the idea. The thought of confessing where he stood was tempting, but when he opened his mouth to speak again he felt Kel's hair brush his cheek as she shook her head once more.

"No! Like I said before Neal would kill you then me and the rest of the camp. If they- if anyone knew they'd think that we were courting, or that I'm promoting you for…_you know_." Dom had to stifle a laugh. She still couldn't say that one little word. "If Wyldon found out we'd all be dead. He wouldn't hesitate sen-"

"Kel, hush." Dom stopped her. "You're going to give yourself a nosebleed. I wasn't serious."

"Well I am!" Kel snapped and stomped her foot. Instantly her cheeks burned. She sounded like an upset noble woman. She blessed the dark for its ability to hide her blush. She wasn't sure if she could hold her mask at the moment, she was too scrambled.

Dom sensed her confusion and rested his hand on the top of her head. "What is it Kel? Really? What do you want?"

Kel sighed. "Let's just get out of here." She suggested, grabbing his hand.

"And go where?" Dom asked as they stumbled to find the way out.

Kel turned and grabbed his head. Quickly she kissed him before looking around again. "The only place we can go."

Dom grumbled the next morning and turned on his side, eyes opening to look around Kel's room for the briefest of moments before shutting them again. Tinny claws cut into his arm, pinching him. He groaned and shook his arm, but a peeping filled the air while the claws tightened in his flesh.

Dom reached out over the sheets and threw his arm over Kel's side. "Your birds!" he mumbled in complaint. "Why don't they sleep in?"

"They're hungry." She grumbled, detangling herself from his arm. Dom made a sound between a gurgle and moan. He pulled his arm back around her, the other joining the first to try and pull her back to him. She looked back at him sleepily to see he had dragged his body halfway upright just to get a grip around her. "Dom, they need food."

"They can eat when we do." He murmured into her side.

Kel shook her head. "They want food now. They won't be quiet till they're fed." She tried to pull away again but she ended up dragging Dom half way over the edge of the bed. "Dom!" She pulled at his grip, but only managed to get his arms to migrate down to her hips where they latched on tighter. She wiggled, trying fruitlessly to make him let go and to straighten her night shirt. "I have to get up anyway. I can't stay in bed all day."

She looked at his face to see him look back at her suddenly crestfallen, his eyes full and glittering with tears. She blinked at him, trying to fathom where he had learned to cry on cue. "Keeeeeeeeeeel." He whined. "But…but aren't we the bestest of friends? Why would you leave me?!" Kel tried to pull away again. He tightened his grip. "Can't you feel our bond? It's strengthening as I speak!"

Kel tugged on his arm, but it was no use. Finally she settled on slithering to the floor to try and slip out of his hold. She only ended up dragging him off the bed completely and on top of her.

Dom let her go and flung himself at her, trying to hug her. Fighting off his arms Kel scooted away on the floor while Dom followed, still half wake. Crawling on her hands and knees Kel attempted to escape Dom's clutches, headed for her office door. Neither of them once thought to get to their feet.

Light from her open window shown in Kel's eyes, making it hard for her to see and she only felt Dom's hand around her ankle as he lunged forward for her. "Leave me alone!" she cried, kicking back with her good leg in an attempt to hit him in the face.

"But Lady Keladry!" he protested, sounding like Neal. "Our undying camaraderie! You're letting us be torn apart by a few sparrows!"

Kel managed to grab the door frame to her office before Dom started pulling on her ankle. Her fingers cramped as she tried to pull herself forward. "I'll never let you touch a hammer again! If you get up I'll make sure that every fort in Tortall doesn't let you do one bit of carpentry." Dom threatened.

Kel sighed. "Dom, really. They need their food. Thirty seconds is all I'm asking for."

Kel let go of the door frame and Dom dragged her back to him, laughing like a little kid. Collecting her in his arms he smothered her with his mouth. "Thirty seconds?"

"Thirty seconds." Kel assured, color rising him her cheeks when she noticed he was in nothing but his loincloth.

He nodded his head and released her, lounging back on her bed while still sitting on the floor. Kel quickly moved into her office and filed the little trays. The sparrows chirped happily as they landed around her desk, shedding their feathers over the floor. Making sure their water was good she shuffled through a few papers before going back into her room.

Dom was still on the floor, his clothes scattered around him. His head was rested back while he stared at the ceiling. Domitan was curled on his lap. Dom petted him absently as the kitten made a loud purr. "Your floor's cold." He said without looking at her. "My loins are frozen."

Kel was about to comment that she didn't want to hear about the condition his_ loins _were in at the moment, but something pounded harshly on her door. Dom perked up at the sound, his head snapping to the door.

"Kel!" Both of them stiffened at the sound of Neal's voice. The pounding got louder. "I know you're awake! You never stay up past dawn and it's been three hours since the sun met the horizon. Put down the paperwork already and open the door."

"One moment!" Kel yelled back, trying to sound normal. Quickly she went around the room, picking up Dom's clothes and shoving them into his arms. She grabbed her breeched from last night and pulled them on, tucking her nightshirt in. Dom was looking at her, his eyes huge with surprise. Kel jerked her head to the dressing room and Dom nodded, ducking into the room quickly.

Kel looked around the room one last time before she turned the knob and let the door open. "Nealan I…." Three pairs of eyes looked at her. Kel was too shocked to notice how each set of eyes looked at her differently. Merric stared at her with confusion showing in his blue eyes, Neal looked like he would laugh, while Thom was plain impatient. "I just wanted to do a bit of paperwork when I woke up and it got a little carried away." She leaned against the door frame. "What do you all need?"

"Master Numair wanted to go out with your next patrol, which is leaving in ten minutes." Thom informed her, obviously trying to conceal his anxiety. "He was hoping you would be attending."

"Yeah," Merric added. "So he wouldn't magic Neal to be quiet."

Kel looked to Neal. "You're going? What about the infirmary?"

Neal waved her off. "They have Luca and the others. I'm a has-been and Bena gave them her freaky miracle herbs. They'll live without me."

Kel nodded. "I'll meet you at the gate. Five minutes I promise." They nodded and Neal dragged Thom away who was scowling. With a sigh Kel closed the door.

And turned right into Dom. "What are you doing out here?" She panicked, wondering if they had caught a glimpse of him before the door was shut.

Dom had already pulled on his other clothes and was scouting out his boots. "I made sure their backs were turned. Don't worry Mother." He teased as he pulled on a boot and scowled. Pulling it back off he saw it was Kel's and tossed it on her bed. "I wouldn't have to worry about that if you were a court lady." He looked up at her, grinning to make sure she knew he was joking.

Kel rolled her eyes and grabbed one of his boots that was sitting practically in front of him. She tossed it to him without warning and it thumped his side. "You can't pin it on _me_. I haven't made the mistake of putting on any of your clothes. So far you've torn two of my shirts because your shoulders were too big to fit in them."

"You need smaller clothes." He informed her, cupping the back of her head and kissing her forehead before he grabbed the door knob.

"Smaller?" Kel looked up at him. "But-"

Dom grinned. "So I can see you through them." He said with a wink. Kel flushed but he never saw. Dom had already disappeared through the door.

Shaking her head at his early morning silliness Kel got her clothes quickly and began to dress. Once she was ready she grabbed her glaive and sword, heading out to meet up with the other warriors.


	18. Chapter 17

…**I was going to send this to you Kelly Masblablabla (like I'm going to take the time to write your oober looong name) but I was so happy I just had to post it!**

**THE CONFESSION PEOPLE!!**

Disarray, confusion, pain

Kel had to bite back the urge to kick Peachblossom into a trop just to entertain herself for a moment. Going on a patrol was a welcome, she needed to get out of the camp, but Raoul and Numair hadn't mentioned meeting up with the herd.

Probably guessed I wouldn't have tagged along if they told me, Kel thought as she ran her fingers through the braids Blossom had made in Peachblossom's hair.

Next to her Merric groaned and drummed his fingers on his horse's saddle. Kel looked at him from the corner of her eye and saw him glaring freely at the herd, his pale brows drawn. "I guess they didn't tell you either." Kel commented.

Merric turned to her with a shrug. "Pirates Swoop wanted to talk with some of them and Master Numair said it wouldn't hurt." He snorted and looked forward. "I hate mages."

Neal stood up in his stirrups and leaned forward while holding the horn to smack the back of Merric's head. The redheaded man turned to scowl at the healing mage.

"How could you possibly be mad at me?" Neal asked tartly. "I'm the one who has been insulted."

"I didn't insult you." Merric snapped, rubbing his head. Kel rolled her eyes and looked away form them back to the herd, but it was impossible not to hear their fight. "I simply stated my hatred for Mages."

"Which is an insult to mages such as myself," Neal retorted. Kel could practically feel the superiority rolling off of Neal and she pictured the smug smile that was surly on his face.

"You're a knight first then a mage then a scholar." Merric replied angrily. "The only time I hate you is when you're being mage-ly. The rest of the time you're scarcely tolerable."

"Says you thou beslubbering motley-minded callet!

Kel rolled her eyes at her friend's retort and looked down when something bumped her elbow. Dill grinned up at her and nuzzled his head into her arm, pushing his head under it like a colt wanting to be pet. He pulled back and flicked Peachblossom with his tale. "Come on." He enthused, skipping out of Peachblossom's way as he aimed a kick. Dill looked to the herd then back to her. "Ezhno's been acquainted with your new, tall friends. Already threatened to kick the bright one."

"Thom?" Kel asked and suppressed a snicker when Dill nodded. Of course Thom would want to talk with Ezhno, but she was sure the centaur didn't return the curiosity.

"Blossom's with them too. Already got Ezhno railed in a corner." He bat his lashes and pitched his voice higher. '"Love is patient and kind not jealous and boastful. Love is not rude or arrogant.'" He snorted, blowing a cloud of cold air out. "I have no idea what she was trying to get at with that. Bena almost fell over when she heard her."

Kel glanced at Neal and Merric to see they were still fighting. Looking back further into the group of men that were waiting for the mages to finish up she saw Dom with Fultcher. Like his cousin he was squabbling with the other man.

Gods, _men_.

Kel slid from Peachblossom and left him un-tethered, knowing he had no intent to run off. When she walked off with Dill they spoke back and forth like old friends. Dill was animated as he laughed over Blackhoof's argument when he found out Ezhno had left the archers behind. They were approaching the other centaurs and Ezhno caught a few of their words.

"He wasn't that mad." He glowered at Dill before turning to Kel. "They wanted to stay behind and shoot. Thought arrows would be enough to take down one of them."

Kel looked around and almost burst into laughter seeing Thom had a head full of braids. He twisted one between his fingers and winked at her when he noticed her looking. Kel smiled and looked back at Ezhno. "So than, die trying?" She waved off his answer. "No one was hurt. It was a one time thing and you aren't under my order. I'm grateful you were even there to help."

Kel turned to Thom again. Blossom was at his side, pushing yellow beads into his hair that clicked together when she ran her fingers through the braids. "So, what have you found out about the herd?" She asked him lightly, ignoring Ezhno's annoyed growl.

Thom's face brightened, making him look like the suns child with his bright hair and darkened skin. In absolutely no way did he look like a scholar who were normally pale and rounded. "Ezhno wouldn't let the mage touch him." Blossom said, with a glare to the stallion, before Thom could open his mouth. "I let him probe me with his gift."

"Their build is amazing." Thom gushed, practically like a court lady over her dress. "Like the Stormwings they have half human organs and half animal. Their esophagus is the same as a human's but the stomach's that of a thousand pound horse holding up to four gallons…."

Thom rambled on for the longest of times. Kel caught that their intestines were that of a horse as well and around fifty feet, but the rest she drew a blank. As interesting as the information seemed to Thom Kel couldn't help but think it was rather dull. Blossom pulled harshly on one of his braids when he started rambling about the reproductive system.

He looked up at her sheepishly. "Sorry," he mumbled while Dill laughed. Out of the corner of her eye Kel could see Ezhno fighting a smile.

Thom looked back to Kel. "They're not prey animals. Not like horses with their fight-or-flight instinct. Rather then them having the first response to a threat as to flee for safety they defend. Like humans can change a horse's nature to that of a fighting war horse the human part of their brains have permanently locked on fight mode." Thom turned to Ezhno. "Who's your alpha stallion?"

"Blackhoof." He replied without a second thought.

"For now." Blossom reminded him lightly. She ignored the look he cast her, talking with Thom. "He's getting too old for the job. The herd needs someone younger and stronger to take the role. Alpha, our chief and leader, must fight off both predators and other herd males to keep our group as one. When we move he brings up the rear to watch for attacks and push stragglers to keep the group together. Making us a herd is his main job. Spring is coming. Mares will start to stray to find other stallions with better presents if he doesn't get a stronger hold on the herd."

"His hold is fine." Ezhno gritted. "A few more years-"

"Months." Blossom looked directly at Ezhno, both forgetting the others presents. "A few more months. The moment the snow thaws the herd will crumble and you know it. Blackhoof's been exposed to weather, predators, and other's challenges for _years_ now. More then a decade. He needs to retire. He's lived a long, venerable-"

"Enough." Ezhno's voice was heavy. Thick with his authority.

"You're his successor-"

"Enough!" He was yelling now. Kel was tempted to take a step back, feeling the power in his command ring in her bones. His straight ability to make the herd sway under his words was apparent in his voice. "That," he said slowly as he tried to push his voice lower, "is not your place."

"It is and you well know it." Blossom seethed back at him. "As part of the herd and family its my right to speak of our flaws. A few more months and you know he'll step down weather you like it or not. If you don't accept we'll only have Hawkinsa and that's no good." Blossom turned, nodded respectfully to the rest of them before trotting off into the herd quickly getting lost from their view.

Ezhno waved Dill back when he took an advancing step. "I'll talk with her. It's not like you could say what she wants to hear." Ezhno commented dryly, looking off at the herd where Blossom had entered, his dark eyes skimming over the crowd to find her. Looking to Kel he nodded like Blossom had and slowly took after her, parting the herd as he past them.

"Is there something I'm missing?" Thom broke the silence that hung between the group. Dill and Bena both smiled and turned to each other, making kissy faces. Thom waved them off. "I got that…wait. Does this mean you don't pasture breed?"

"Who's Hawkinsa?" Kel asked abruptly.

"Alpha female." Bena answered her. "When we move she's the one who leads us. She chooses where we stay and the places to eat and drink. The only problem is that while she does that the herd needs protection. Blackhoof isn't the strongest of the stallions anymore and struggles with being Alpha. With the new immortals his job is nearly impossible."

"Ah," Kel nodded, the argument clicking together.

For over an hour or so she simply listened to Thom and Bena talk back and forth, Thom grinning every time the filly sparked his interest. He's going to have laugh lines at a very young age, Kel thought as she leaned against Dill's flank, letting the stallion play with her hair. She was getting so used to being around them it didn't even bother her when they sniffed her and stroked her skin.

Looking at Thom Kel had to hide a snicker. No doubt laugh lines would just make him more appealing rather then less. Make his happy nature even happier, if that was possible.

Conversation stopped when Ezhno rejoined the group. He was precise with his words, saying frankly that the humans were heading out with a group of stallions he'd be leading under Kel and Raoul. "You're coming too." He muttered to Dill who grinned at him. Ezhno wouldn't look at his cheery face. "Since you've made it obvious that you'd do…_right_ by the herd and Mundanes in a situation you may come with."

"Mundane?" Thom muttered while Dill laughed happily, pulling Kel onto his back.

She didn't kick or try to hit him, but she complained. With a sigh Kel gave up when Dill said he'd just give her a ride back to her mount after making a comment about her gaining some weight. Though she was larger then most human girls she was still small to a centaur, just not quite a toothpick.

"I think it's their mean name for humans." Kel answered Thom's question, untying the loose braids Dill had put in her hair. She tried not to giggle as Thom's beads made soft ticking sounds and he trotted to keep up with the centaur's long strides and failed miserably, laughing behind her hand.

"We don't try to be mean. Well, I don't." Dill said happily, shooting a look at Ezhno. Comically the older, more regal centaur stuck his tongue out at him. That caused another strand of giggles to ebb from Kel's lips. Dill smirked at Ezhno and continued as they approached the company of men that was beginning to mix with the stallions. "I call you Mundane as an endearment."

"So when you called me Mundane and talent-less you were saying it lovingly?" Neal asked, catching their conversation. "How nice."

Dill snorted at him. "No, when I call Kelly Mundane I mean it as an endearment. When I call you Mundane I mean it as an insult."

"And when Ezhno says it, it's always an insult." Kel muttered as Dill lifted her from his back, his hands cupped under her arms to lift her up like she weighed nothing. The fact that he could do such a thing made her glare at him from atop Peachblossom. He but smiled at her.

When Raoul came to her side he was giving her the same look he had given her when he asked about her and Ezhno's _friendship_. She scowled at him, muttering.

From the back of the company Dom hung low to the rear, not wanting to be around the herd. It was impossible not to glimpse them though, which he didn't mind, but he did his best to avoid talking to them. Silently he watched the golden haired stallion that had been carrying Kel chatter with Neal, his face holding something close to mockery.

Without a thought before hand Dom looked to Kel, a habit that he never managed to break. He snorted, seeing the redheaded mage hop onto a chestnut to ride at her side opposite of Raoul. The man certainly didn't have a problem with making a joke of himself, letting Kel tug on one of the bright braids on his head.

Fire swirled furiously in his abdomen when the mage, Thom, caught her hand and held it to his puffed out chest. By the way Kel snatched her hand away and swatted his shoulder he was teasing her. Flirting.

Dom looked away to his saddle horn, but his thought wasn't on the worn leather.

He wouldn't have to puff out his chest like that if he had more muscle. And his hair wouldn't be as bright if he got out in the sun a bit more to darken that pale skin, Dom thought sourly of the man. He tried not to choke on his own bitterness or let his face become pinched.

But, then again she does like redheads. His thought continued. His arm lifted to allow his fingers to thread through his own hair, the dark locks falling into his eyes. If only they were lighter. If only the almost microscopic tinge of ginger that was in his brown locks was stronger….

"Agh!" He dropped his hand quickly, glowering inwardly at himself while his face only showed slight disgust by the curl of his lips.

He was acting like…like a woman.

No, he balled his hand into a fist. That's not fair. Kel would never think like _this_. He looked up to just glance at the powerful, compelling woman who sat straight in her saddle, patently waiting for the riding group to get ready. Quickly he looked away again.

Kel may not think as he was, but it was hard for him not to. Dom had noticed before that while he rode next to Kel he actually seemed shorter for she had a longer waist then him and he the longer legs. The man currently at her side hovered over her both on horse back and ground. Was that it? Did she like her men taller then her? It would make sense for her to want someone who could dwarf her so she wouldn't have to try to do it for herself. Dom at her side was an equal, if only a few inches taller. Neal had said he was a good measure between Cleon and Thom, but what if Kel really didn't care about how broad a man was? What if she liked a slight, tall one rather then a pair of shoulders?

And his hair! Every night Dom stared at the dye he had bought in Corus wondering weather or not to use it. He knew the men would make a fuss about it, teasing him and making up names, but that was just one thing. It would wash out as well and dull in the sun. His hair would grow to make dark lines at his roots while the ends of his hair frizzed. What if Kel thought the color looked odd on him?

The thought made Dom hit his head with the first thing he could get his hands on: his flask. The impact didn't help much and he took a gulp of the brandy the container held. He might as well be giggling in a dress at the moment. Thinking about hair color, physical traits, and other frippery was for young girls with nothing to do but marry. He was a soldier, a sergeant, and had worked damn hard to get where he was over the years. He didn't have the mind or time to worry about what color matched his skin tone or what his sweetheart would prefer….

Dom smiled a little then, thinking of Kel and calling her that name. His sweetheart. Like Cleon had been, but different. Better. Not as a burden but a person who was welcome at all times. He took another swig from his canteen as the group moved forward. Without much effort he fell to the back of the party further, riding between the extra horses being lead by tethers. Gripping the hilt of his sword he pretended to be on the alert, watching the rear of the group. Rather he was staring ahead with a glazed look in his eyes, his mind wandering to thoughts and places other then the wood they were creeping into slowly.

Leafs that were hidden under the frost crunched under the horse's feet while ice patches shattered and twigs snapped. Still, Dom's mind drifted. Thin branches reached out dangerously close to his face, close enough to cut his flesh or his eye. Still, Dom's mind drifted. Short shadows created by the noon sun quivered as a breeze pulled at the thin trees, making snow thud from their peaks to the ground. Dom's finger barely twitched.

His head lifted when he heard a sound. An eagle calling a cry that was almost a warning to all that moved through the area. Others lifted their heads as well, almost the entire group. Too distracted to hear the shifting of claws on snow no one could stop the shadow as it lunged from the dark, aiming for the weakest in the train of humans and immortals.

Dom.

A horse's scream made him turn just in time to be thrown from the saddle from a heavy weight hitting his chest. He managed only a shallow howl of pain as he hit the ground before his mind drew to a blank. Teeth sunk into his left shoulder, tarring away his mail and shirt with little effort. Dom's mind snapped to when the manticore tore into his flesh, pulling back his skin to reach the thick meat that was wrapped around his arms and shoulder. With his right hand Dom groped for his sword, feeling it in the scrape board still. Drawing it quickly he hacked at the creature's golden furred back without mercy, cutting into meat and ribs.

Over the roar in his ears Dom heard the group go into an uproar. Feet hit the ground, crushing the snow harshly as they ran to gather around him, but none of them moved to aid him. There was nothing to be done. Go too close and the manticore would snap his neck to finish him off quickly or they'd be cut by his fierce swings.

Dom struck a winning cord as his sword sunk in between two caps of the manticore's spine. The creatures movements instantly stopped, it's spine broken and it's heart ceasing to beat as nerves shut down. Dom didn't shove the thing off of himself, there wasn't the time and he hadn't the strength in the first place. Instead two of the men lifted it from him, but they had to stop for a moment to pry the manticore's mouth from his shoulder.

For a moment Dom just laid in the snow, letting it melt under him. The group stayed back, giving him his space to retch or catch his breath. Finally he pushed himself up with one arm and looked at his shoulder, but he saw nothing but a bloody mess, not even sure if there was an arm left under the large stain.

The sight of his own blood never made Dom sick and he was perfectly fine till the fire began to lick up his side. He gasped, head spinning as the pain grew. Suddenly the urge to throw up was on him and he turned to his side, emptying himself violently. He yelped as he leaned on his tattered arm, but was choked back with more bile.

Dom forced himself to him hand and knees, letting his left arm hang limp, as he vomited to no end. When all contents of his stomach were gone he began to spit up water and blood mixed with stomach acid that burned his throat worse then the vomit had. The fire in his side spread up to his other arm and he fell forward, twisting himself to the side to avoid landing in his waste. Something gouged into him where he landed and he bit his lip hard to stop from crying out. Panting he rolled off of that side and turned his head to look at the pained area. Five sharp bards penetrated his mail over his ribs, thin as lock picks but stiff. He moaned, recognizing them as the stingers on the manticore's tail. The poison sent a fire through his core, scorching in from the inside out.

Suddenly the urge to vomit was on him again as the redheaded mage dropped to his knees at Dom's side, green light collecting in his palms. The air buzzed with magic as the Own's mages sent their gifts into the air, searching the woods.

Kel followed Thom and took Dom's head just as she had done for the other men that had been attacked. Resting him gently in her lap she pulled out her handkerchief and wiped the vomit from his mouth and cheeks, cleaning the bite he had made in his bottom lip. Her heart throbbed ten times faster then normal and thundered in her ribs. Dom looked back at her, eyes beginning to glaze over. He opened his mouth as if to say something but froze, eyes locked on her face and mouth still parted as the poison locked him with its stunner.

Kel held him up as Thom let his magic swirl around Dom's shoulder and over the rest of his body. She held herself back from asking if he'd be okay. She knew he'd be, just like the other's who'd been attacked from the hunting groups.

"We need to get him back to the fort." Thom said calmly and whistled for one of the men to ready a horse. They'd need to tie him to keep him on. "The bleeding will stop, but I can't do anything for infection and poison right now. That'll take a while and I think we should get out of here soon. It looks like the mages picked up something bad."

Kel looked up and heard Numair swear loudly. _Very_ loudly. He stomped past a few men, snapping words to them that sent them jumping back, headed to Raoul after glancing at her for a moment. Thom chuckled. "Yep, something up. You're lucky you have your hands full at the moment or he'd explode on you."

"Master Numair doesn't explode." Kel said without conviction and flinched when she heard Numair's voice rise from where he shouted at Raoul. Thom chuckled again.

When the men lifted Dom onto a horse's back Kel stood. "Send half of the men back to the camp ahead with Sergeant Domitan." She instructed Aiden who nodded. "We'll be back shortly with the rest. Would you inform Ezhno that the hunt will be cut short and he should go back to the herd?" Aiden frowned at the last bit, but nodded all the same.

Turning around she thought to see Thom prodding at the manticore corpse, but rather he was looking off at the few Own mages that were strong enough to sense for other manticore now that they were looking for them directly. Kel watched the mages as well, seeing they were all jumpy and flustered like Numair.

Thom glanced at her and cocked his head in the direction of the mages, moving toward them and meaning for her to follow. Reluctantly she caught up with him and walked at his side silently. Thom passed the mages without a comment and Kel hesitated before following him further. A path had been made through the woods and Kel instantly caught the copper tang that was floating in the air.

Blood, but not fresh. She couldn't push it aside with the title of Dom's blood on it. She could smell the difference on the wind as it whipped in her face. It was milder, not as strong and a bit bitterer.

She had been walking behind Thom as he led her down the narrow, broken path. When he stopped she pressed around him, looking at the brush before them. Instantly she looked away.

The snow had done little to protect what was left of the corps, though there was very little to protect. The flesh that still clung loosely to the bloodstained bones was bloated and saggy. Majority of the meat was gone along with the fat. Bits of things still decorated the bashed skeleton, but it was rotten and turning on itself.

Kel pinched her nose quickly as the wind carried the smell to her. She gagged, turning around for a second to collect herself before looking back again. Thom had moved forward without hesitation, not even covering his nose from the smell. He snapped a stick from a nearby tree and pushed back a flap of remaining skin that now resembled leather. Insects spilled out of the corpse as it jostled and Kel fought her stomach.

"My mother would have screamed her head off, if that makes you feel better." Thom commented coolly as he continued to poke the body. Setting the stick down a few minutes later he picked up something a few feet away. Holding it up to the light Kel saw it was a bone. "There's bite marks." He remarked lightly. "Sharp ones." He shrugged a bag from his shoulder and set it by the body, loosening the strings to open it. Gently he placed the bone in the bag and pulled out a pair of gloved. Sliding them over his hands he began packing up the rest of the remains.

He only looked up when Kel dry retched. "You're face is pallid." He said bluntly, his eyes slipping back down to the body. He continued to place the rotten shell that once had lived in the bag. "Go back to the camp. Tell Numair I've already started."

Kel didn't argue and returned back to the rest of the group. Numair seemed relatively calm and she told him what Thom asked. He didn't seem surprised. Rather he muttered something about being that age again as he shuffled off to meet the other mage.

With a sigh of relief that she was away from the corps Kel moved to Raoul's side and asked what Numair had told him. "It's him," he stated bluntly and Kel's head snapped to face him before she calmed her face. "It's the mage who made them. I_ knew_ they couldn't be god made."

"How does he know?" Kel asked, keeping her voice smooth.

Raoul's lips thinned. "Even with only a scrapping of the bloke left he could see the bond between the manticore corps and the man. Tied together with magic even in death." By the look in his eyes Raoul didn't seem to like the idea of being attached to someone forever. Kel had to admit she didn't either.

Kel looked over to the flustered mages and confused soldiers who were looking impatient and eager to leave. "Why would he do it?" she looked up at Raoul. "Why create something that'll turn on you? What could have possessed him to do something so stupid?"

"We live with fairy tale creatures now Kel." Raoul said without looking at her. "For years before the immortals walked the earth again mages and scholars have been infatuated with the tales of creatures created by the gods that had been locked away. It was only a matter of time before some powerful mage would try to play gods and do something like this, make his own creature." He glanced at the corps of the manticore, still lying in the snow. Kel signaled for a soldier to bag it. "He probably heard of the manticore story Ezhno talked about. Probably thought they were marvelous creatures." He shrugged. "His stupidity led him to his own death."

Kel sighed. She just wished whoever this man was didn't have to bring others down with his fantasies. People she loved….

Waiting to see Dom again was _murder_. Kel had gotten back to the camp as soon as possible, but he was still being treated. Then he was sleeping. On her sixth trip to the infirmary an annoyed healer told her that he was resting in his own bed. Her heart thumping Kel rushed to the barracks and the sergeant's quarters.

The barracks were oddly empty, all the men at dinner. The empty bunks and messy bags felt odd with no one to claim them. The Own's barracks were never empty. There was always someone there.

That just made Kel fly faster to the sergeant's room, remembering there was only one person in particular she wanted to see. But Kel froze at the door, her hand clasping the cold knob tightly. What if he still was sleeping? She should come back later; let him get his rest….

But something in the room shifted followed by a regretting hiss. Kel turned the knob and slipped into the slightly smaller room. The beds were like the ones in the infirmary rather then bunks. On one in the corner a very pale Dom rested stiffly, wrapped in bandages and blankets.

Quietly Kel closed the door behind her and patted closer to him, trying not to make a noise. He heard her when she was less then three feet from his head. "Wolset, if you want to poke me again I'll cut you down with my sword the first…." He had turned his head, his voice drifting as he looked at who it was to see him.

Kel moved closer slowly, like just seeing her walk hurt him. Carefully she perched herself as close to him as she dared to get on him bed, making it so he didn't shift his weight. In the end it was a fruitless attempt. She had managed to say, "Why does Wolset," before Dom pushed himself up and covered her mouth quickly. It lasted but a second before he fell back again harshly, panting, but she could taste the teas he had been taking on her lips.

"Gods." He whispered, his eyes closed while his face was a mixture between tranquility and pain. "Oh gods Kel. I love you."

Dom's eyes snapped open, suddenly aware of what he had said. He turned his head slightly to glimpse at Kel. She just stared at him, shell shocked. No, what have I done? He screamed in his head. No, no, no, _no_!

Kel continued to look at him, mouth slightly parted. "Wha-what?" she stammered.

There was no turning back now, and he knew it well. "I…I love you." She still stared at him, her shock plain. Dom watched as her face changed in worry. He had expected surprise of course, sympathy, definitely regret. Part of him wished to see relief and acceptance, but what he saw was completely unexpected. Rage. It was plain her eyes and his heart turned cold. "Kel-"

"How long?" she interrupted. Her voice was as steely as her eyes. Dom bit the inside of his cheek till it bled again when he watched her hands clench into fists on her knees. She didn't stand from her perch on the edge of his bed, and he attempted to sit up only to wince back down.

"I'm not sure." He admitted, looking at the coverlet over his bandaged body. Dom wasn't lying. He wasn't sure of the exact date that it hit him; it was more of a slow recognition. "During Scanra, maybe before even. All I knew was that you were the kind of woman I wanted. The kind I needed." He looked at her again, her face still a cloud of unshed anger. "I don't expect anything back, Kel. I'll live with friendship," he winced, and not from his wounds. "You don't have to say you love me too."

"Expect anything back, huh?" He looked at her. Her voice had been laced with an icy sarcasm he had never heard her utter before. Her hands were white, her face flushed, and her lips pressed together tightly in a thin line. "Why is that Dom? Because you already got everything you wanted?"

"What? No, Kel it's not like that. I _love you_." He stressed the words. "_I_ love you," he repeated like she thought he was talking about someone else. "I still do, always will."

Her jaw clenched. "You _idiot_," she hissed.

"I'm so sorry Kel-"

"I loved you." She continued as if he hadn't begun to speak. "I would have said yes to whatever you wanted. That's probably why I did to your _deal_." She spat the last word. "Is that how it is for you? Sex comes before love? Did you want it so bad that you couldn't bother to tell me?" Her eyes shifted over his face, reading him. "You never were going to tell me. Were you? Or did you just think that sex was more important?"

"Kel, I wanted to," he said weakly. "I wanted to scream it, but our friendship-"

"Friendship?" She laughed dryly.

"Our friendship," Dom insisted, "was more important. I couldn't loose you."

"So is this how all your friendships work?" Her voice was too pleasant and he winced at the false cheer. "Is this how you get your court Ladies? Games, manipulations, pretenses, _pressure_? What promises did you make them, how long did you stay? How much money do you get as a bed-warmer in Corus these days? I looked it up once as a page when I was told that was all I was but now I-"

"Kel, please." Dom begged. "I didn't manipulate you."

"Well you sure as the gods didn't do it for the reasons you told me! Did you?"

Dom withered in self disgust. "I saw how you relaxed around me, how you slept better. I thought it could help, that I might be able to stop-"

"But that's not all, is it?" Kel interrupted. Dom looked at her, and there was obvious resentment in her features. Something in his chest split and his wounds burned once again. There was no use.

He closed his eyes for a moment before opening them again. Painfully he turned to his side to look at her straight on. She deserved that much in a conversation like this. "I needed something Kel. Not sex, just…feeling. I let myself think that you felt the same or that after a while…."

"I'd fall in love with you." Kel finished his statement and stood. She wouldn't look at him. "I can't fall for someone who lied to me Dom. You've ruined it. _We've_ ruined it." She took a step away from him, then another.

"I'll make this right Kel, I promise." Dom scrapped desperately for something to stop her movement to the door. "I'll do what it takes, just please."

"How do you plan to do that?" she yanked open the door, her face cold. He saw her chest begin to rise and fall quicker, signs she would start sobbing soon. Luckily the barracks were all but empty at the moment. A first in a long time.

"I don't know." He was frantic as she turned again. "I'll make it right, someday, but not now! I can't now. Please just-" his voice cracked. "Just say you don't hate me. _Please_."

"I can't. I'd love to rise above this Dom, _really_, I would. But I can't." She stepped out and closed the door behind her. With little regard to his bandages Dom crumbled to the ground, falling from his bed and his throat closed with sobs.

Something churned inside of him. He was nothing but a useless object. A friend. She had many friends already, what was one more? He doubted she would even want to look at him now let alone be his friend. A bed warmer. He had offered his body to her, his heart, but she no longer wanted them. She had taken his offer thinking of it as just that, but the moment she found his heart was involved Kel had dismissed him. Now he was just a burden to her like Neal had described Cleon. An old memory that she'd rather forget.

And she should forget me, he thought in pain. What could I offer her? What sort of caretaker am I to treat her like this? I can't even protect her from herself. I can't even protect her from _me_. The Protector of the Small needs a stronger second-self then a soldier in the Own. A powerful noble or knight or mage who could keep her from killing herself, not the second son of a well standing fief that ran from home to fight in the Kings Own. Not a man who couldn't even think for the slightest of seconds she could have cared from him because he was too stupid to let the thought settle. Not the man who tricked her to make his own fantasy seem real.

Dom frowned to the frozen floor, tears burning his cuts and his hands throbbing to the rhythm of his thumping heart. She deserved better, the blood beating in his ears whispered. She deserved better.

And he didn't deserve her.

Kel was on her knees outside the door, her emotions getting the better of her. Rough cries ripped form her chest and she smothered them quickly. She couldn't stop the tears though and they shattered on the floor beneath her. She had thought she had been falling away with him, finding a place better them where she was at. Now she knew she was only falling away, falling apart, while he went the other direction. Getting up she moved quickly to her rooms where she could breakdown in silence.

She clutched her stomach, feeling the need to heave the moment she stumbled into her room. Kel fell to her knees on the cold floor, hiding her face in her hands. She let herself remain in sobs for a moment before she shoved them back, creating a pain in her stomach. She thought of a lake, calm and smooth with no rain rippling its surface. She thought of the shinning surface, the soft flowing movement of the water.

She sat up, she was a calm lake. She needed to be.

Looking around the room everything she saw reminded her of the times spent there, reminded her of _him_. The chair he threw his clothes on, the table where he set the food after that first night, even the bathing tub reminded her of him! The biggest reminder sat in front of her. The sheets were still rumpled on the bed from them being interrupted that morning, pillow fallen to the floor.

Kel jumped to her feet. She needed to forget he had ever been there. Quickly she stripped the bed and remade it, pulling the sheets so tight it seemed like the mattress was made out of wood.

Suddenly her hands stopped mid action, her stomach feeling the need to heave again but this time more violently. She just barely made it to the privy before her stomach rolled out her last meal.

Empty and tired she slipped to the floor, her hot cheek resting on the cool ground. The fight, Dom, the sickness was warring on her body and her eyes sealed themselves shut without her telling them too. Her head began to grow lighter and she slipped into a light doze.

She woke up no les then an hour later. Her limbs felt heavy as well as her lids. Parting her lips she tasted copper as they cracked. Heaving herself to her feet she walked blindly back into her room.

It was silent in the small area, no sounds of another person creeping around. Her door had remained shut, the shutters closed as well. The bed was still made perfectly, making her aware that Jump and Domitan were out with her friends.

She didn't feel right in this room. Every thing in it was calm and still, but her heart was racing and her head spun.

Her eyes flitted around the room and stopped on the bag rested on the bedside table. Kel's fingers twitched. She never used it before. One time wouldn't do anything.

She sat down on the edge of her bed and opened the bag. The powder looked the same as it always had the several times she had opened it and contemplated actually taking some. She sniffed it, the grains burning the inside of her nose.

She felt herself relaxing already and readied a cup of warm water. Judging how much to put in she used as much as she would with green tea. She watched, interested, as the powder dissolved in the water rather then settling at the bottom of the cup.

Sweetness flowed into her mouth as she tipped the cup back. It swirled in her cheeks for a bit before sliding smoothly down her rough throat, settling in her stomach. She waited a moment, testing it, before taking another sip. Her muscles loosened, heat filled her. She felt her movements become sluggish. By the fourth sip she no longer realized where she was. When it was gone she no longer cared. She was focusing the little she had to focus on the sweet tender feeling pulsing through her veins. Kel felt as her lips grew heavier, as the cramps in her neck and calves lessened, and as her eyes closed.

She didn't hear the cup as she dropped it to the ground, didn't hear it crack. She fell back heavily, the blankets on her bed rumpling and plain cotton feeling like silk over her skin. Part of her mind wanted to fight back against the thick haze, but it wasn't strong enough. The rest of her body called it on and she drifted so deep in sleep she didn't bother going under the sheets.

**Squeals! Yaaaaay! I've had this argument and breakdown written **_**forever**_**, but it's been a long time coming. Ha! Take that Joker! Get him Batman…and your bat things!**

**(Cough) Well. Yeah.**

**So I made Kel take a drug. And I made Dom get attacked. And I made Thom touch dead thing. (Screams for that!!) Hmmm…kinda long chappie too, but I love it.**

**I need your opinions people, because otherwise I only have my own. You want to hear what I think when I type a story?**

_**Oooh! Let's add that. Oh! Make them stripers! Talk for three pages about that guy's accent. EVERY ONE GET DRUNK!!**_** PENIS! **_**Evil cackles!!**_

**Yeah, I know. Damn my teenage mind! Damn me to hell!!**

**(Cough)**

**Review!!**


	19. Chapter 18

Don't make her sleep with Thom…alright

**Don't make her sleep with Thom…alright. I wasn't going to but, hey. **_**He's Thom**_**. How can you **_**not**_** imagine sleeping with him?**

Face It

Waking up that morning Kel felt better than she had for a long while. Her body was relaxed, loose. She tilted her chin up, looking at Domitan who was sleeping on her chest. Feeling her move his eyes opened into slits. With a muttered meow he licked the tip of her nose and turned around, going back to sleep.

Kel sighed and sat up, her movements feeling more fluid from the sleep even though she had slept oddly, half off her bed. Domitan growled and moved to lie on her pillow. Looking around the room silently she saw everything was the same, but for the broken mug on the floor. Frowning, she got to her feet and looked around for something to pick it up with while avoiding getting her fingers cut.

She had just thrown away the last of the mug when there was a light tap on the door. Kel scowled, her brow creasing. For a moment she stared at the door, dreading who was behind it. Could she face them? Though she was oddly revived from the long nights sleep Kel still felt dirty. A kind of grime coating her skin that could never be washed away.

Kel looked to Domitan. "What do you think?" she asked without expecting an answer. Obviously she didn't get one and Domitan rolled away from the sound of her voice. Kel sighed, her head spinning slightly. "I can't avoid it." She muttered to herself and yanked on a fresh set of clothes.

When she opened the door Kel was granted with a…surprise visit? Maybe it wasn't such a surprise, seeing as she had known Yuki was still at New Hope, but she hadn't seen her friend since her wedding. Kel had just thought Neal was being selfish and keeping the woman to himself, but now it seemed the Yamani had made a prison break.

Yuki smiled at her, her arm tightening around the basket she held. Her eyes were sad. "I'm leaving at noon." She announced as Kel stepped back form the door frame to let the other woman walk into the room. Jump pranced over to greet the Yamani. Yuki set the basket on Kel's bed and scratched Jump. Kel hid the tea when she wasn't looking.

"So soon?" she asked when it was out of sight. She sat down on her bed, feeling uncomfortable hiding the tea from her friend. It wasn't as though it was…bad or anything. She juts didn't think it was good. "I've barley seen you your entire visit. You and Lalasa both. Plus Raoul is hiding Buri from me as well!"

Yuki smirked, Yamani mask loosened. "That's what you get when all your friends have lovers." Kel was about to open her mouth to say Lalasa didn't have a lover when Yuki gave her a knowing look.

"No!" Kel smiled. "Who is it?"

Yuki opened the basket she had with her and drew out a set of plates she set the out on the bed top. Kel watched as her friend unwrapped a serving of Udon and laid it out on the plates before poring a sweet smelling red sauce over them. In a cup like bowl she poured out a rice-gruel and past it to Kel who took it, letting the Kayu in the cup warm her hands.

Yuki took her time before answering, popping a piece of sashimi in her mouth. "She met him at the wedding." She said once she had finished chewing and tipped the basket so Kel could see all it contents. With grilled chicken on skewers and fried pork cutlets they had a hefty meal to eat. "He's one of the Own…no. He's their standard-bearer. Kind of small, shy man; perfect for her." Yuki offered Kel a Gyoza; a dumpling filled with minced vegetables and ground meat.

Kel took it, but it fell from her fingers to leave a grease stain on her bed cover. Yuki muttered in Yamani, dabbing at the dark blotch with a handkerchief. "Lerant," Kel sputtered, not believing her friend. "_Him_? How?!"

Yuki looked at her with her thin brows raised. "You can't have all the men to yourself Keladry. Lerant is a fine piece. He'll do well by our friend."

Kel softened, becoming ashamed of herself. "I just never took Lerant as a relationship sort of man…or in any way romantic."

"It doesn't seem that way." Yuki muttered innocently as she lifted a dumpling to her lips. "I haven't seen either of them the past few nights…."

"Okay, please…," Kel sighed. "Could we discuss something else? I suppose this will be my last time speaking with you for a while?"

Yuki nodded. "How about we discuss why you don't have a man yet yourself. Neal has told me a few have shown interest…what's this?" She sat back, studying the younger girl. "Kel's blushing?"

Kel turned her head before looking back, her mask in place. "Can I tell you something Yuki? You need to promise never to repeat it."

The other girl smiled, sealing her lips. "Not a word." She promised. "Now, what is it?"

It was hard to talk about at first, telling her best girl friend about her old and new crush. It got easier as the story went on and Yuki frowned, brow creasing at the part of Neal's bachelor party. The frown washed away to a smile when Kel _briefly_ told her about what had happened after the wedding. "Let me finish." Kel said quickly as Yuki began to giggle. Her friend quieted when she saw the look in Kel's eyes. Rushing through the rest of the story Kel ended with what happened the night before, with the exception of her using the tea.

"Do you suppose I deserve this?" Kel whispered to her hands when she finished. "I know what I did was stupid, but he loves me. Or he says he does. Where's my happy ending? You found one…why can't I?"

Yuki was frowning, twisting her handkerchief in her small hands. "I think you're being too hard on him Kel." Yuki murmured quietly, looking to her lap. Obviously she didn't want to say the wrong thing and was worried for her friend. "If you think on it, you used him too."

Kel sat up straight. "I did not!"

Yuki looked at her levelly and Kel hunched down a bit. "You wanted him, just like he wanted you, and you used that silly deal as an excuse. You let your desires win out just like he did."

"It was his idea in the first place." Kel muttered, but she knew Yuki was right. "You don't understand. He told me it was for _me_, not him! He had told me the whole time that it was all for me when it really was just to keep himself satisfied. He manipulated me Yuki. I can't just forget that."

The Yamani girl chewed her lip. "Kel, but you-"

"I didn't make shallow promises." Kel interrupted her friend, knowing what she was going to say. "I _didn't lie_. He did."

"But you didn't take his offer for the reasons he was giving it."

Kel bit her lip as her eyes began to water. "I don't know why I listened to him Yuki. He was my friend. I thought…I thought he'd never feel that way. I thought maybe he could help, that maybe I'd feel better and I did. He did help me forget, but only for a while.

"And I wanted him so badly." Yuki was shocked a her friends mask split down the middle and a tear escaped. Yuki grabbed her and hugged her friend tightly as she shook. Kel was raked with emotion again. "I couldn't say no. I wanted this for years, but I didn't want it _like_ this."

After a dozen or so shushes and long rocking Kel pulled herself back, wiping the water from her face and neck. She felt like an idiot, but what do you do when the one who can stop you from crying is the one who made you start? When her hand slid over her collarbone she touched nothing but flesh. Her eyes watered as she pulled back the lacings, looking frantically. "No, no, no, no!"

The charm was gone, still rested on the stone floor of her privy.

Two weeks later Kel was found by Neal pacing in her office. Her friend watched her as she twirled on her heels, more nervous then he had ever seen. She had been becoming sick of recent, vomiting up her every meal and loosing weight rapidly. For days he had watched as the muscle was eaten away for energy.

"You can't live like this." Neal sighed. "Let me look at you at least, you've never fought me so much before. Honestly Kel, this could just be a bug. Do you want the whole camp getting it?"

"It's not a bug." She snapped; her face full of emotion. Neal was startled. He had never seen her present herself so. Kel tossed him a piece of thick parchment with neat writing over it.

Neal read through it quickly, his brows furrowed. "Oh!" he yelped, startles as he read, 'must evacuate before the coming week or measures will be taken'. He looked up at her, not reading on. "You've been reassigned?"

"I've been _dismissed_." She took the paper back and Neal watched as she tore it in half.

"Kel," he began but she turned from him. "Kel, please. Listen to me! We knew it was coming. You were assigned to build New Hope, not run it."

"I know," she replied stiffly as she slid her sword into the sheath at her hip. She turned and left before he could say more, calling to him. "I'm off for a ride."

Thankfully no one was in the stables and she saddled Peachblossom quickly. It was when she rode out to the gate that Dom grabbed her reins. Kel glared openly at her horse, feeling no need to hide her face. Emotions throbbed through her faster then ever and her body was raked with frustration when her horse didn't rear at the intruder for once.

"Kel," Dom panted, obviously he had been running. "Neal says you're going out of the fort."

"Neal is correct, Sergeant." She saw him flinch. "Let go of my horse. He does have a tendency to bite and I'm not promising to stop him."

"Kel, this is ridiculous." Dom shouted. "You can't go out there. Gods know what could be in those woods. There may still be some Manticore alive."

"You are misinformed about our situation." She told him bluntly. "The Manticore were only males, no way of reproducing. With their creator dead their numbers had depleted greatly."

She tried to steer Peachblossom away, but Dom held the reins tight and the horse whinnied. "We may not have killed them all in the hunts." He grunted as he tried to pull the large beast back to him. "Kel, please. Why are you doing this?"

"Why not?" She snapped. "Would you deny any other a ride, or is it just me you detest?"

Dom let go, shocked by her words, and Kel kicked Peachblossom into a trot before he could regain himself. The gate rose and she galloped out, not raising the hood to her burnoose. It whipped behind her like a lash, but she made no move to tame it. At the moment it matched her temper.

She rode for little over an hour before she even began to slow her gelding. The wind had cut through her fogged mind. It cut through her confusion. She wasn't ready to leave. She wasn't ready to let the refugee's go.

She wasn't ready to be a mother.

Kel shoved the thought back, needing all her effort to do so. She didn't hear the branches break. She didn't see the spidren as it threw her from the saddle with a slender, hairy leg. Kel scrambled back in the snow, avoiding Peachblossom's hoofs as he kicked at the immortal advancing and dodging the green silk hurtling at her from the creatures spinner.

"You idiot!" a voice cut through Peachblossom's cries of anger and the spidren's shouts of hate. Hazel eye's watched as a dark figure broke through the woods shadows and the spidren's head departed from its body. Acid shot from all directions as the creature fell and Kel hissed as it splattered against her face and in her eyes.

"Stupid…ignorant…Mundane…." A voice was grumbling. A familiar voice. Kel looked up from her spot in the snow to see Ezhno kicking against the dead spidren's flank with his foot. There was a crunch as he broke through the exoskeleton and he pulled his hoof back quickly as blood began to pool out. Without comment he wiped his hoof clean in the snow.

"How did you get here?" Kel asked, trying to sit up. When she managed it she reached up and held her bleeding head. It throbbed to the rhythm of her pounding heart. "Only Neal knew-"

"Who told Raoul, who told Blackhoof, who sent me." He smirked at her, coming to her side. "I'm an excellent tracker. Here." Kel looked up, her hand still holding her bleeding head. Ezhno had his arm outstretched, offering her a chunk of wood. He sighed when she just blinked at him. "It's willow bark. Put it in your mouth and chew it to keep off the headache."

Kel nodded and accepted the small slab of wood. When she placed it in her mouth and bit down it crunched, a sour sap hidden under a brittle shell sticking the wood to her tongue and teeth. Ezhno must have seen distaste on her face because he ordered her to keep it in her mouth and swallow once it was chewed thoroughly.

She did and sharp bits still cut down her throat. The sour taste lingered in her mouth, but slowly the throbbing in her head dissipated. "You have magic?" she asked and Ezhno shook his head.

"It's herbalism, not magic. It's easier to get drugs and medicines from plants than from you Mundanes. While you go to a healer with a slight gift for healing with a brewing disease, spend your coppers for their service, we just use what is at hand. Simple things, like the bark from a cinchona dried and powdered into a bitter grain, can stop illnesses like malaria. Consumption of a certain poppy plant will relieve a person of physical pain for hours. A paste made from extracts from peppers that contain capsaicin can sooth pain from viral diseases that cause rashes like herpes zoster. Cumin in hot milk can help a cold while boiling them in water to make tea helps stomach problems and birth. We all don't have the gift like Bena, but herbs still are strong in themselves."

"Really?" Kel put a hand on her stomach. It had been acting up on her lately, heaving up her breakfast right after she had it.

Ezhno raised his brows. "Expecting?"

"Oh, no." She shook her head vigorously. "Just an upset stomach sometimes."

He nodded, turning to look at the dead spidren. "We should head back to the herd." He spoke with his back to her. "Get you looked at to see if there's any serious damage and get something to sooth off the poison we have touched. We'll send messengers out to get some of your men to collect the corps." He turned back to her, watching her as she stumbled to her feet. "You can ask one of the mares about the cumin, if you wish. They'd know where to get you some even in the snow."

She nodded, mounted up on Peachblossom, and followed him as he navigated his way through grounds she didn't remember. It was quiet for a long while before she asked about the herbalism again, truly interested in it. He didn't seem to mind talking about it and surprisingly knew a lot on the subject, things she knew Neal would be interested in. She learned the medical uses for plants and food she hadn't known could do anything but ward off hunger or make a pretty smell like; artichokes, petasites, ginger, milk thistle, magnolias, peppermint, oregano and other things she had heard of.

"So, if I put honey on a wound it would help?" She asked disbelievingly.

"It could help fight against some infections yes, but I still think it would be a bit of a hassle to bring a jar of it where ever you went. We mix it in with dried camellia sinensis leaves, which help scaring and rot, and a few other things till they make a sort of gel. See." Kel turned her head to see he was holding out a small wooden container filled with a yellow-green gel. The odor wafting off of it reminded her of green tea and her bruise balm, tangy but bitter. Ezhno pocketed it in his sash.

"So, do you always eat wood when you get a headache?" Kel asked, half serious.

Ezhno smiled at her, actually smiled, and Kel almost fell from Peachblossom's back. "No. Usually we use the flower-herb feverfew, but seeing as the frost wiped them out we have to make do with what we have."

"Which leads to splinters in your gums?" Kel muttered. It was silent again and she couldn't stop the words as they flooded from her lips. "Stop me if I'm being rude, I don't mean to be, but where are you from? I mean before you were part of the herd. How long have you been with them?"

She thought he wasn't going to answer, that he just ignored the question, and looked away. When he spoke it wasn't terse or annoyed like she had expected. "I'll tell you the story later." His voice sounded candid and Kel turned to see the herd in the distance. "Right now there're more important things to do."

Kel thought Ezhno was avoiding the topic of his past as fillies swarmed around her, but he waited for them to finish and pulled her aside from the heard, walking slowly so she'd be at his side. "Why must you know this?" he asked.

Kel shrugged, for once feeling blunt. "Curious."

Ezhno glanced at her from the corner of his eye. "You've changed." He lifted his head. "You even smell different."

Kel wrinkled her nose. "I thought we were going to discuss you."

Ezhno sighed. "It isn't much of a story. I was a colt of another herd, a rival in Scanra. They weren't as strong and large as our herd now and the famine got to them. The fillies and colts lived the longest, surviving…" he glanced at her again, eyes mistrusting. "We survived by what meat we had at hand."

Kel stiffened for a moment, understanding his meaning. They had eaten others of their kind. It was so wrong, but what else could they have done in a famine? Human's had a tendency of going to such rash measures as well.

"I was the only living one when Blackhoof began pressing into our old territory, thinking use all dead." Ezhno smirked. "I tried to kill him. Threw a knife into his shoulder when I was aiming for his throat. For that I got three arrows aimed at my chest, one at my heart." Kel blinked, not expecting that. How could he have lived?

"Blackhoof stopped them." Ezhno continued. "He pulled the knife from his shoulder and threw it to the ground before me, telling me to throw it again and aim my best. Rather than that I threw my hardest and it splintered his collarbone.

"He had me do that for two hours, till his chest was smeared with blood. After that he only laughed and called for me to have some food. I wouldn't eat. I thought he had poisoned it. He called for me to have a blanket, and I discarded it thinking bugs had been sewn into the fibers.

"I stayed with them like that for two years, not taking their offerings and finding my food around them in villages and the wood. I had tired to run, honestly more than once a day, but it was always Blackhoof who caught me and brought me back over his flank. I tried to kill him more than once, cut down his limbs with traps and snares, but they never worked. The old charger was too cunning and turned them on me. I broke both my back legs twice from my own trap and while immobile I was forced to take their kindness. I would have starved myself, would have let myself die first, but Blackhoof wouldn't' allow it.

"Hawkinsa practically forced fed me," he smirked. "I would spit the food back out, but then she would only scowl me for it and have me eat the already chewed food. She tied knots in my hair and brushed them out when I couldn't move away, playing and beading my hair like the mares of the herd now. With her I watched them more, I listened.

"By the time I was fifteen I was finally able to beat Blackhoof at something. I had gone for a gallop in the woods and he followed, running at my side to watch me. In a matter of minutes I had out run him, an hour later I could no longer see him behind me. When I trotted back to the herd he was there, grinning like the old fool he is. He clapped me on the shoulder, squeezing it like a father. Like he was my sire.

"You see, Blackhoof is sterile." Ezhno explained. "But he was a great Alpha. The herd had decided that he would have the choice of the season's colts, that he'd be able to choose the strongest as his apprentice. He did choose from the season's colts, but just not from his heard." He smiled to himself. "Blackhoof chose me. The whole thing was a test. The famine, the attempts at murdering him, my running away, it was all part of his trick. The bloody con had several of his stallions stationed around my herds feeding ground, killing and stealing all our game to create our famine. He purposely starved them, forcing me and my other yearlings to defend ourselves. I was the one who survived. I was the one he chose to be his successor. The years he allowed my to try to run and kill him were his training! He was allowing me to do it on my own, figure it out on my own, but on the day I had out run him he told me what he wanted. What I needed to do."

"And he's been openly training you since?" Kel asked, running over to story in her head. Blackhoof was more cunning than she gave him credit for. Ezhno nodded. "And when do you think you'll be taking his place? Soon surely-"

Ezhno snorted out a wet breath. "He's still young, considering. A few years more."

Kel glanced at him, eyes measuring the look on his face. "Blossom said months."

"Blossom is _wrong_." He snarled.

Kel smirked and looked away from him. "You know, just because he is no longer Alpha doesn't mean he will no longer be there. Every leader needs an advisor. Our king had several; his Queen, the Champion, Lord Gareth, and even my Lord Raoul. You'll still have him," she glanced at him slyly, "and even Blossom will be willing to help you."

Kel watched as Ezhno's shoulder's stiffened with satisfaction. "Blossom's too stubborn."

"She's passionate."

"She won't listen to me."

"Sometimes that's a good thing." Kel smiled up at him and they stopped their walking. "Sometimes I wonder if she's the only one who speaks freely to you. It seems so. She's not afraid to tell you what you don't want to hear. She's not afraid to tell you what needs to be done."

"Blossom argues with me." Ezhno shook his head, hair flopping into his face. "We fight."

"Yet you calm her back down again." A rash warmed his cheeks at that.

Kel opened her mouth to add more, but a shrill voice cut through the air. "Kelly!" Bena called wildly as she trotted up to them. Blossom wasn't more then two strides behind her; face bright with a smile. Ezhno's face flushed further and Kel grinned.

"What is it?" Kel asked when they stopped before them.

Blossom engulfed her in a hug, surprising Kel. "I knew you smelt different!" she cried happily, her eyes filling with moisture. "So, late September! Will you not still be here?"

Kel blinked, pulling back from the young mare. "Lord Wyldon sent the call for my departure already." She looked to Bena. "What is this about September?"

"You're leaving-"

"Ezhno, leave us for a moment please." Bena cut off her sister. The stallion stared at her, a little shocked by the blunt demand. Bena glared at him. "Go on. I'm sure Blackhoof will like you to tell him what happened so Lord Raoul does not assume the worse when he arrives."

Ezhno snorted and turned from them, flicking the filly in the face with his tail. Bena growled at him. "You disserved it." Blossom snorted. "He is your senior."

"He's yours too." Bena snapped, but turned her attention away from her sister to Kel. A smile broke across her face and the little centaur placed her hand on Kel's stomach. "Nine months."

Kel's heart rate sparked and no matter how hard she focused she could not raise her mask. Over the past couple weeks wholes had burned into her guard, raw emotion fighting against her will. Now it was difficult to even divert her glassy eyes.

So she was a mother. She wasn't just sick. Kel's head swam as her stomach lurched. She wished she still was ignorant of the other life. She wished it were still possible to pretend that it had never happened, but now with Bena and Blossom cooing like doves while asking questions about care and shelter and love it was impossible. She was a mother, and she was only twenty.

Something in her mind clicked together, her commander and humanitarian instincts taking over her judgment for the better. Her options were clear, that she knew. There were thousands of different options before her still, and she planned on taking the one that suited her best.

"I don't know the father," she whispered when the question came up. Anger boiled in her veins still, sick loathing swirled in her mind, but she would not bring Dom down with her. He had the own still, he had his reputation. What he had done he had done out of love, no matter how much it hurt them both. He didn't deserve to have his life end for her.

"Where will you live, if not New Hope?" Blossom asked her eyes as glassy as Kel's. "We're going to miss you."

Kel smiled at them both. "Well, I plan to stay at Mindelan when the baby is ready to be born and a few months after that." She shrugged, making light of the topic. "Till then I plan to stay on the field. Maybe go to Frasrlund on the border. They've been under siege and should be meeting a stalemate soon. They'll need help and it'll be good to see more of my fellow knights, not that I won't miss the refugees."

Blossom's brow furrowed. "Fight and carry a baby? You…you can't possibly-"

"For a few months," Bena nodded gravely. She gave Kel a disapproving look. "If you fight till you give birth…the muscle will be too thick. The baby would be damaged, possibly dead. Weather it lives or dies, if you have too much muscle and your walls are hard you could die from birth Kelly."

Kel frowned. "What does that have to do-"

Bena was on a streak of cutting people off. The filly didn't seem to care for manners. "Your body needs to soften, carry some fats for the baby's and your own sake. Fighting will make your body hard," she poked Kel's arm, "like you already are. The baby won't pass well."

Kel nodded, understanding. If she wanted this life inside of her, mingling with her own, to live than she needed to do her best. The Lioness was a mother, she managed with Thom. Though she had had the Baron to help her with the raising, Kel had her own family.

Kel lifted her head at the sound of falling hooves. Raoul, face burning red, trotted into the herd. Two Own members followed behind him, first aid attached to the back of their horses. Kel sighed and turned to her friends. "He should be broiling about now. I've never seen his face so bright."

"Protector," Raoul called, voice cutting. Keladry flinched under it. She felt as though she were a squire again, insignificant and young.

She smiled apologetically to the centaurs before her. With a half smile she pressed her finger to her lips. "Shhh on the baby news, please? It's too new." She reassurance them when their faces gave away their thoughts. "I'm planning to tell them, just my close friends though. I'm still going to be a knight; I just can't protect others as I'm doing now."

I can't watch an entire refugee camp and hold this baby. There's not enough privacy!

Kel mounted Peachblossom when he was brought to her. She needed to get back to New Hope, find Neal, and explain some things. Hopefully her friend would listen.

**I'm trying to ease myself back into this story. Sorry for the hold up. Schools sucks, I have to read Billy Shakespeare, swear in French, and keep the boys out of my pants. You think Kel has men troubles, she only has one! Try three and she'd die from epilepsy!**

Sorry if you don't like the writing or the chap is too short, I just need time I guess. I've fallen from my groove people! I beg forgiveness! It took me 58 days in counting to update!!!


	20. Didn't mean to get your hopes up

I'm sorry for not updating this story for, like, over half a year. But now I know I will not right any longer for it. So far into the summer every day has been taken up by something or someone. Me and my hubby are getting serious. I don't have the time for lesser writings like Snarls.

I'm glad you all like it. I'm still getting reviews on occasions and it's favorite almost twice every day. My inbox is flooded with mail because of it. Really, I was only just bored last summer. I didn't expect this as the result.

I relinquish ownership of this story to whoever wishes to continue it. I knew when I paused in writing I shouldn't have. Now I'm into different books and different writings (none of which I publish through this website). So have fun with it.

Bye bye

Heather Love


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